Intent to Grow [Guild Wars 1]

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“Hmm, I wonder if it’s possible to revive the soul.”

roka of air open
Two years ago, I decided to make money.
Last year, I tried to make money with drawing. I failed.

The stuff didn’t sell. It didn’t sell because I didn’t draw what everyone wanted. And I didn’t draw what everyone wanted because I barely even drew what I wanted. Why don’t I draw what I want? Even when I want it? Because I think I’m doing what I want, but that’s not what’s really happening.

On 2023 Dec 25 I decided on my new year’s resolution: have fun drawing. Not ‘make more drawings’, not ‘make better drawings’. ‘Have fun drawing’. Fun comes first. One of 2023’s NYRs was to “solve the world problem”: why do drawings sometimes feel like characters and stories and worlds, and why do they sometimes feel like lines and colors and suffering on a page. NYR 2024 was the continuation: the difference between those two states is fun. Worlds are created when the drawing is fun. Probably. That was the bet.

The bet was a new bet. I don’t have fun: not in drawing, not anywhere. Not purposively, not reliably. In the first place I had never known what fun meant, until that month, when I came up with a definition. Fun: is fulfilling the original objective. Set an objective, realize the objective, arrive at the objective. That is “fun”. This requires properly defining the desired purpose, and knowing my current position in real time. I have historically been bad at both: I don’t know what I’m doing, nor do I know how I’m doing. Either are both have always shifted: ‘that doesn’t count’, ‘it’s okay thats fine too’, ‘it gets worse before it gets better’. I needed to fix it. If I have fun at drawing, I can make better drawings. I’d never had fun before, I never thought fun was important. But maybe it is important. And if it is important, I’m going to solve it where it’s most important to have it first. If I have fun, then I can draw worlds, then I can draw more, then I can draw what I want, then I can draw what other people want, then I can make money drawing. The logic looked good.

That bet has been going well. Drawing has gotten faster, more fun, more clear. Many old problems now have solutions, including problems I didn’t know I had. I’ve tried drawing a few pieces, failed, got depressed, and got back up and solved them, much faster than before. Soon I’ll have comfortably applied having fun to the idea of drawing itself enough to be able to post sketches and simple drawings and “incomplete”s. It’s clear people enjoy rkgks and wips, and I know why they enjoy those. I think after I can do that, working on big pieces will be easier. ‘Big’, after all is a feeling. So is ‘Complete’. It’s not some number or set of technical achievements.

This post though is not about drawing. This post is about a sidequest.

Having decided to have fun in drawing has apparently caused me to automatically decide I had to have fun everywhere. In whatever I was doing. I thought I’d have to manually export fun from drawing and push it elsewhere. I didn’t. It arrived first.

One month ago, in the middle of March, I noticed my current position had a problem. It’s something I’ve noticed many times, but this was the first time under the model of “current position”: I browse the internet too much. Hours of pointless refreshing and scrolling. What’s the objective? Undefined. What’s the current position? Unbounded time. And I don’t even like what I’m looking at. Even things I do like looking at like anime girls, I’m not looking at them – I’m just downloading them into the correct folder. What? What am I doing.

Why do I do this? I think this is because I have Moon in Sag H3. Moon is soul is reflection of light, Sagittarius is wanderlust, House 3 is gossip and talk. Moon in Sag H3: I like listening to wandering talk and seeing wandering images. The infinite feed of wild schizos on 4chan and twitter and youtube have got me by the astrological balls. What would solve this? Every weakness is a corresponding strength: Moon in Sag shaped problems have Moon in Sag shaped solutions.

I now have a solution. At least for now. But not in a Moon in Sag way, I don’t think.

Opposite to Moon in Sag H3 I have Mars in Gemini H9. 7 degrees, so no aspect, but I’ve noticed a lot of things along these lines before, so maybe 7 degrees is close enough. An aspect implies some of a different planet and sign has commentary on a given planet and sign’s matters. Mars is the planet of energy and action. Gemini is the sign of trade. House 9 is the house of higher knowledge. Opposite means opposes, conflicts, counters, solves. An opposite aspect implies it’s possible to solve Moon in Sag type problems with Mars in Gemini shaped solutions.

I think this is a Mars in Gemini kind of story.

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White Album 2: Song of the World

White Album 2 is the second time where I’ve asked not “how good is it”, but, “is it the best”.

To say something is “good” is to say it meets my standards. This in turn implies my standards are better than the piece. This time, they were not better. They were not only not better, the piece had parts of me in it, showed how things play out, and then showed a better way in real time. There are many stories that have changed me, but with one exception all have been material I worked with later in retrospect. This makes it unclear how much change is for other reasons, and how much change is because the story said so. The first story that made changes in real time, where the longer things went on the more in tune I got, was Muv-Luv Alternative. White Album 2 is the second.

This is about White Album 2, the visual novel, and my thoughts on it as a whole. The VN as a whole will be referred to as WA2, the first third and anime as IC, the second third as CC, and final third as CD. Ten years ago I watched back-to-back the first 7-9 episodes of IC, then the rest as it was airing. Last year on release of the english translation I read part of IC, up til the first sleepover at Kazusa’s. A week ago I read the rest of IC, CC as Setsuna > Koharu > Chiaki > Chiaki True > Mari, and Kazusa True of CD. For CC Setsuna was my blind arrival; my choices were entirely motivated by reaching Kazusa. The other routes were ordered consciously. I think it’s the best. For the other endings of CD I’ve read commentaries.

My opinion two weeks ago was IC has the best pilot episode of all time and 8/8 overall. My current opinion on IC is, for anyone uncertain, the anime can be watched in place of reading IC: watch the anime, then skip to near the end and play the final few scenes to get familiar with the layout and pacing for CC. The anime adds the events of side content “From When The Snow Melts To When It Falls Again”, and is overall better than the VN, except for the OP, where it is very much the reverse.

The first half of this post is written such that it could be used as a reading guide. It doesn’t contain any spoilers in the sense that any thing discussed is already revealed by the anime or VN in its opening scene and official descriptions, but I think the best way and the only real ‘no spoilers’ is to do things blind, here it is also true. I think WA2 teaches people how to read itself well and guides are unnecessary (if anything, guides are worse than events, because guides reveal patterns rather than points). The second half does contain spoilers. The pictures at the end I think are disconnected enough to spoil nothing, but I also picked them because they lay out everything. I think someone with no knowledge of WA2 could get a good grasp of what it’s about and still enjoy it after. Like watching a trailer.


White Album 2 is known as a drama/romance with a love triangle. The main characters are a hastily assembled group performing at the highschool festival, and then they have relationship problems afterwards. The characters and writing are subtle, detailed, and realistic. This is an accurate overview. of events that occur in IC. It can be said this is what IC is about.

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Two Orders of Magnitude, Please

One year ago 22.06.04-05 I wrote a declaration of intent.

I was not satisfied with suffering 40 hours 50 weeks 50 years for no purpose and no result. What was the point? I could see nothing there that I wanted.

What do I want? A lot of things. Most are probably things I will never have. One of these desires is to continue drawing Kaori once a year. This seemed simple enough. Was there a way to live where that could also be a reality?

This past weekend 23.05.26-28 I tabled at an anime convention for the first time.

My local convention is Fanime in San Jose. The one I went to was Anime North in Toronto, 2200 miles away, on the other side of the continent, 1/12th of the way around the world. More than a few people questioned this decision for more than a few reasons. I chose to go because it was the first one available to me. I needed to retrieve the results. I needed to find out what this endeavor looked like for real.

I found out what it looked like. I found a lot of things. So many things.


First, the most important thing, the original reason I came here: Did I make money?

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Again

“Accounting is a superpower.”

Alrenous

This is my financial statement and prospectus of my existence.

The alternate title is “time”, but this name was used recently in a private file on the same topic with a slightly different objective, of “slave sealing the slave hole forever”. That one was retrospective. This one is prospective. I’m going to be reusing or reference a decent amount from there, but reordering is also making something new. So this gets the next closest name. What is the next closest name? “Money” is not good. “Accounting” is ok, but it’s the tool and not the aim. After some deliberation, as far as I can tell, this next closest name is “Again”.
So “Again” it is.

I need money.

What is the point of money?
The point of money is to eat, the point of eating is to live. I can’t make enough off the land available to me to eat. This is because I live in the domain of a city. To eat, I need money, to acquire money, I need to trade. In other words, business. Every city-dweller runs a business. Most today run businesses with a single client. This is called a “job”. Jobs are what get most people money.

What does my job history look like?
This is what’s on my resume:

  • K12 A+/B- student
  • college degree in mechanical engineering
  • nothing
  • draftsperson of shop drawings
  • more nothing
  • maintenance department shop clerk
  • even more nothing
  • cable quality checker.

“A+/B-” was not a mistype. My homework grades were 100 0 0 0 100 100 100 100 0 0 100 0 0 0 0. It has extended beyond school. It will continue.

The next item on my resume will be nothing. This is because I need time to think again.
The item or two, hopefully not three, after that will be entirely unrelated to engineering.
The item after that, the objective is, will be nothing. This item will be the last.

What is the important distinction between people?

When people introduce themselves, in america (I’ve heard it’s different elsewhere but I don’t live “elsewhere”), it is their job. “I am a [job]”. Their job is their identity; “identity” is the word for “what a person thinks is the important distinction between people”. Jobs are seen as instances/downstream of “career paths”.

Why do people think of careers as the important distinction? School said so. Parents said so, college said so, news said so. And time says so: you are the habits of your five friends (astrology: H11’s H3 is H1), a fortiori, you are what you toil for eight hours a day (H10’s H4 is H1, search “turning the chart”). If you spend 8h/d, or 2000h/yr on something, and someone spends 2000h on something else, the distance increases at a rate up to 4000h/yr. If it is true to get to the higher positions you need 10,000h or more, then calling it a ladder is accurate: you need every step to get to every other step. Selecting this as identity would be a coherent line of reasoning.

It is a line of reasoning I do not agree with. I do not believe this is the important distinction.

I think the important distinction is the 8h/d. I don’t think this is the correct name, as it invites things like 9/9/80 (9h 9d 80h/wk), 10/4 (10h 4d/wk), and any number of others I haven’t heard of that are all the same in my accounting. I will call all of them 40/50/50: 40 hours a week, 50 weeks a year, 50 years a life. More accurately for millenials (Pluto in Scorpio) it is 40/50/60 but that seems like a worse name so 40/50/50 it is. The important distinction between people is those who are 40/50/50, and those who are not.

Why do I think of 40/50/50 as the important distinction? It’s because I know what work is.
It’s not from being a neet, I’ve been a neet three times. This time is the first time this thought has arrived.

What is work? Work is an action that has a net positive output.
What is net? Net is desired minus undesired. In order to determine net, the action must end.

This is the totality of “accounting”.

What do you want? What don’t you want? Combine them all, get the result. Accounting.

What you want is what you will tend to get. This is a truth. It is also true that the more you get into anything the more you will learn about it – new costs, new benefits, new categories and measurements. From time to time the equation and balance needs to be checked again. The scales must be weighed.
Weighing the scales is called “making a decision”. Deciding and weighing are the same thing.

What do I think work is? I think work is anything that leads to me doing less work.
I’ve always thought of introductions and tell-me-about-yourselfs as stupid questions because “I am a [job]” has never made sense to me. I refused to answer “what is your dream job” as a kid, “I am an engineer” has never left my mouth, and hearing “You’re the engineer” has made me want to puke. But it occurred to me, for a time, I did answer a question like this, in a way I like. In League of Legends, 2012, both normal and ranked games. If that time and place were an in-person professional scenario, I would have said something like this:

“Hi, I’m korezaan. I play support.”

I “play” support. I “am” not a support.

I play support, and in LoL S2/3, that happened to mean I was in lane with the ADC warding and things and that thing is what other people call “support”. What I do, is I play support (I went from Bronze 1 to Gold 4 playing ~purely support).

What is “support”? Support is a modifier. Could be supporting anything. What do I support?
Most people think of themselves as a job. I think of myself as a job eliminator. I am a systems improver. I support improving systems: I work to eliminate work. Work broadly is anything with a net positive output. I have a stricter subset: the rate of increase must also increase. In calculus this is called the second derivative, in physics this is called acceleration. I think of work as that which increases the second derivative: things that accelerate the value per unit work. First derivative/velocity is boring.

Value/Position though is very interesting.
The hierarchy of achieving output/value/position is as follows:

  1. no work
  2. decreasing work
  3. cheap work
  4. constant work

The second category, which is the second derivative, can be done with everything. Every thing can be done better. The first category is gifts from god. These commonly come in the form of ideas, but there are things which simply happen for free. Sunlight is a common one. Fresh air is another.

The third category is finding good deals. Velocity. The realm of general human action.
The fourth category is where jobs are.
The second category is downstream of the first.
The first category is downstream of prayer, which is just telos.
Telos is “I want that”. That’s it. Ask and ye shall receive. What you want, you will tend to get.

Why do I know what work is?

I know what work is because I know what I want, and what getting what I want looks like.

I can show you a picture of it, because I have a picture of it. It looks like this:

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Demand for Propaganda

You cannot con an honest man.

Information is a kind of product. It is bought and sold, through middlemen, which is why it is called “media”. Information which is not demanded is not produced. This applies even to information that is purely collected: if you don’t care, you won’t look; if you don’t look, you won’t see. Naturally information that is manufactured purely for the market is also subject.

This law does not change.

The current example is “fog of war” “overdrive wartime propaganda”. This law does not change.

The primary risk in delegation/trade is receiving lies.
The primary counter should be better personnel selection. This text is about an alternative method.

Every lie is designed for a certain end. The end is to meet the demand.

Q: “I want to hear X”
A: “X is true”.

Lies are detected by changing Q and seeing if A remains constant. “Is the story consistent?”.
Consistency is generally framed as “with respect to reality”, but that is the very thing we are attempting to extract, which makes the model circular and useless, unless we are there to see it ourselves, in which case we don’t need to be asking about it. Here what is changed is not perspective and position in reality, but perspective and position in the mind. Change what you want to know.

It is not “asking different questions”. Wanting to know different things may result in asking different questions. but frequently many interests can derive a suitable solution from a single answer to a single question. This is possibly because people are inherently different and there will always be some difference between the answerer and the questioner.

If the answer remains constant, that is to say, appears in the expected shape in the new perspective, then it is not a lie – as far as you can tell. It is entirely possible the answerer outranks you. But this is what it means to check something. Someone better at “verification” runs this same path, only with more experience. If someone outranks you, there’s not much you can do. If you are reading this though, you outrank most of the peasantry. Literacy is uncommon, comprehension less: If it does not remain constant, it is a lie.

The easiest way to detect a lie is to naturally have no demand for what the answerer is producing. This is why magicians and teachers work most poorly on kids.

Beyond this, you can simulate lack of demand, either by manually invoking it (literally: “I want something else now”), or by doing things at the “wrong” time.

Doing things at the “wrong” time, that is to say, doing most things at the right time and catching most lies at the wrong time, is rather trivial as long as your job is not “journalist”. Interests and attention derive from position, and everyone, even factory line workers and NEETs, has different positions. Pay attention to your position, and you will have interest patterns that differ from others. Have different interest patterns than others, and you will detect when they lie.

This technique has a prerequisite of approximately zero field-specific experience.

In other words, to detect a liar, you must not be a liar yourself.
Alternatively, if someone habitually gets fooled, you can be well assured, they habitually lie.

You cannot con an honest man.


“If you’re reading it, it’s for you.”

TheLastPsychiatrist

“In a few weeks we are all going to forget how confused we were & remember only the parts that turned out to be “true” per a group narrative. Nature of the mind.”

Nemets

“As Alrenous likes to say, “My middle name is “No One””.
Most utility is derived from other people. Being contrary imposes a cost. Are you deriving a benefit from that cost? Unless it’s your job / you’ve decided it is your job, it’ll be no, and thus the position will not be held.

Costs and benefits are concepts meaningful only when there is an objective. To have an objective, or to believe that people operate on objectives (teleology), means that you think the world has people that aren’t doing what the lord is telling them to do.

If you were being faithful, you would be able to cite some “principle”. Thus you must be not only a traitor, but a usurper – ‘it takes one to know one’. In other words, invoking teleology, objectives, or costs and benefits, is equivalent to saying the lord is illegitimate.”

22_02_25-26

“Well said. Unlikely that anybody would hold on to a costly position that they derove 0 benefits from just because of principle”

Sharsrain

“Principles” are heuristics are tools. Tools are for achieving objectives. “Position” in large part is systems, i.e. how/what you hand off to other people. Who you spend time with determines who you are, and media penetration is the same as reach of the state. Adherence to “principle” is the mark of a retainer. The question then becomes, is your lord any good to you.

22_02_25

“occasional reminder that in a fog-of-war/psyop environment this thick, many of the events that people are endlessly using for take fodder on here may well not ever have happened

one recommendation here: if you’re determined to stare directly at the psyop, find some pro-Russian feeds to watch (alongside the pro-Ukrainian sources that are mostly feeding Anglosphere media). comparing and contrasting the two can help isolate the stupider flights of fancy”

Dedicating Ruckus

“.@Logo_Daedalus is right that this is the moment when everyone reveals his true self, where he stands in the world. from a theoretical perspective it is a moment of absolute clarity, like when the stars arrange themselves into a perfect alignment, you see where everything stands.”

Landshark

“This is the beauty of cheating: they can’t say “we didn’t mean this back-door to be used by you, we placed it for someone else”.”

Greedy Goblin

“People soyfacing at the Ukrainian government telling 14 year olds to make molotovs and throw them at approaching russian tanks are completely disgusting and sick in the head. No, that’s not noble or brave or patriotic, it’s utterly wasteful lunacy.”

Tinkzorg

“Thoughts and prayers” is used mockingly, but it’s incorrect. This is because the speaker does not know what a real thought or a real prayer looks like. Specifically: inability to discern a liar. Saying a liar is telling truth (“they’re sending thoughts and prayers”) is a lie.

Similarly, “spectator sport” is also a misnomer. Sports fans generally don’t care about other teams, let alone other sports. You know who looks into things that have nothing to do with them? What do we call people that talk about things that are none of their business? Exactly.”

22_02_25

“dawning on me reading this ukraine stuff, it’s not that i’m immune to psyops, it’s that i am immune to its effects in this case. “this is the beauty of cheating” – all lies are designed for a certain end, and if the end does not match then it has no effect. ukrainian news continually highlights the suffering of women and the heroics of men and the shittiness of russians. i don’t care about any of these. i want to know what the troop movements are. it’s not that when everyone looks left i look right or that i have some special truth-sniffing ability. would i know if the lines on the maps are lies? no. but it so happens this does not seem to be the standard journoprop doctrine in this case. as a happy coincidence, this means they smell bad because they’re running on a completely different axis and thus i tend to find out why.

it seems to me ability to change interest in this sense will almost always be vastly cheaper, short of being there to see it yourself, than finding whether or not something is explicitly/technically “true”.

i think this is your one guy’s ‘demand for propaganda'””

22_02_26

“The ad lets the women become beautiful without selling them anything. It lets them win. It lets them win. It endears them and you to Dove, it makes you feel more sympathetic to Dove, like it’s an ethical beauty products company, like it’s Lawful Neutral. It gave these women its confidence; it gave you, the viewer, its confidence.

And then– spoiler alert– it will screw you and take your money.

[…] You may feel your brain start trying to piece this together, but you should stop, there’s a twist: where did you see this ad? It wasn’t during an episode of The Mentalist on the assumption that you’re a 55 year old woman whose husband is “working late.” In fact… it’s not even playing anywhere. You didn’t stumble on it, you were sent to it, it was sent to you– it was selected for you to see. How did they know? Because if you’re watching it, it’s for you.

TheLastPsychiatrist

“Too many people of my acquaintance place a lot of stock in Hanlon’s Razor, specifically because their immediate thought after running it is “… But nobody could be that stupid.” Evil is not a great model for explaining bad results much of the time. Stupidity has same problem.

McKenzie’s Razor and Shaving Cream: Don’t attribute to evil what you can explain by emergent behavior in complex system.

You should aggressively update your estimate on whether a system is bugged or not by inspecting whether the system delivers sensible outputs given its inputs.

This is instrumentally useful for technologists because you probably spend a lot of your time around very smart people and very bugged systems, and therefore you will not prematurely rush to conclude “Hmm that there black box has smart people operating it; probably flawless.””

Patrick McKenzie

“Emergent behavior in a complex system” is a fancy way of saying “Real behaviors in real life”. Are people only to be judged on explicitly declared intent in simple linear scenarios? Then what is the point of knowledge?

Teleology is real and your intent will (always be) revealing itself.

There is no “oops” and there are no “accidents”.

20_04_24

“It’s both invigorating and frustrating to me to see how quickly we’re capable of distributing vaccines when e.g. a temporary blip in power availability takes out a freezer and threatens them thawing. Institutions discover trivial ease of administering 1k+ shots in a day.

“Why frustrating?” Because why did we need an emergency to discover that capability? We had an emergency that was already an actual, demonstrable threat to human life in every town with a busted freezer. It was the covid-19 pandemic.

Why do we tolerate such mediocrity, up and down our response effort? Why will we tolerate it tomorrow?”

Patrick McKenzie

“Do you want to know?

You don’t want to know.

You don’t want to know, you want to look like you want to know, and you will get exactly what you want.”

21_02_16

“Marx was right about false consciousness, except it’s already pro-communist, not anti-communist.

“I can’t stop re-reading this anecdote about the U.S. military trying to teach rural Afghans about taxes and they’re immediately just like “no, that’s theft” lmao”
@porterburkett12

Jacques Ellul’s demand for propaganda is real.”

Alrenous

“you know it would really be something. how do i put this. people are the results of their choices. epigenetics is real. everything is 80~100% hereditary. people are dumber today than they were a hundred years ago. this is because everyone has decided to be stupid and evil.”

22_02_17

“It is a principle of the art of war that one should simply lay down his life and strike. If one’s opponent also does the same, it is an even match. Defeating one’s opponent is then a matter of faith and destiny.”

“A person who does not want to be struck by the enemy’s arrows will have no divine protection. For a man who does not wish to be hit by the arrows of a common soldier, but rather those by a warrior of fame, there will be the protection for which he has asked.”

Hagakure
Yamamoto Tsunetomo

“I’m not really interested in truth. Truth relies on consensus and evidence; it is by definition ex post facto.

I’m interested in what truth is before it is truth.”

The World Beyond Words
18_01_19

“Every cheat is an inbalance in the game. Every inbalance can be exploited. The exploit is the ultimate proof, everything else can be disproved. I can write essays about a hidden door in the wall, I can use lot of evidence, I can be as careful as I am and I can still be wrong.

There is one unquestionable way to prove the existence of the door: open it and walk trough it.”

Greedy Goblin

Ideas are Tooling

“2017 : ?
2018 : ideas are equipment/systems
2019 : ideas are gods
2020 : ?
2021 ? ideas are tooling”

2021 Apr 14

DS 59A2 Kaori

I found a lot of new technologies this year. I felt I should write them down.

I haven’t written a blog post in a long time. This is somewhat of a shame. There is a utility to writing reviews or reports, which can only be done at some length (text) from some length (time) in a permanent format. Twitter has a length limit, conversations online or off are impermanent, and at least my diary does not normally reflect much past the day in question, certainly not with any deliberate structure. I have not written posts partially because the aforementioned types have eaten them up, partially because when I have been doing such reviews in drawing they’ve tended to be wordy and not useful, and partially because my blog is on WordPress and WordPress’s UI has gotten more useless every time I look at it. For this last problem I’ve become aware Typora can write in Markdown and then auto-convert to HTML which I can largely c/p without dealing with WordPress. This appears to work so this piece should be publicly available at completion. If not I intended to write this anyway. There’s a diary type I have for things like this.

These are some of the things I’ve found this year. The list is partially sorted for presentation effect.

> DocFetcher
> I don’t serve the machine, the machine serves me
> Steno
> Eye-rolling / Sweeping
> Sweeping, Hedge-Trimming, Dishwashing
> Soap, Sponges, Vinegar, Dried Meat, and Raw Eggs
> Music shapes emotion
> Physiognomy is real
> Evil is real
> The truth is always overdetermined
> Proper shapes / timings are real
> Tiers of Information

— It turns out I wrote a lot again. I had wanted something nice and short and to the point. Instead it’s nice and long and there’s already a nice flow and I don’t wanna cut it. Hopefully it’ll be like AMITJ; read once and the thing gets conveyed forever.

The quotes/pictures were added afterward. They’re spread across the piece this time but like AMITJ they’re echoes (or what I say is an echo of them), so you can skip over and it makes little difference. The main reason why I didn’t put them all at the end this time was several sections I don’t have any references so it felt better this way. In any case this sort of thing is apparently the way I like to do sources. I wish there were an easier and better way but this is what’s available and how it appeared to me this time.

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Drawing: Study List, Extended

What is a drawing?
What is drawing?

What do I know about drawing?

DS 31 loli three christmas

The short answer is in my drawings.

The longer than short answer is I try to think about everything I do, I naturally overthink things to begin with, and drawing is something I have done for some time. “How long have you drawn” has a few different answering paradigms, some people make the number bigger for one reason, some smaller for another. In context of this post the relevant numbers are December 2014, when I found measuring and art became a knowable skill, and October 2019, after which I’ve reliably drawn something every day. Between those two dates was a slow ramp-up from once every week or two weeks and peaking at maybe five days a week, but only some hours a day, never really liked doing it, and never really made anything. October 2019 I participated in a spinoff of a niche version of Inktober, the art event where you draw one thing every day according to the public script. I did FGOctober’s Jacktober on a whim and decided I’d make a full color piece every day. At the start I had no idea how color worked. I’d used colors a total of 3 times before, all of them colorpicked from their original picture. This or floundering would be how the first half of Jacktober’s colors were picked. By the second half, I had some idea of what was going on and tried playing around. Some of them didn’t work out, but a good number of them did. At the end of those 31 days, I had 31 pieces completed. In the previous 5 years, I had 10. More importantly, I had a better idea of what a drawing was. Or perhaps I didn’t have the idea to ask that question before that.

The long answer is this post.

The main body of this post is a list of items in two categories. The order of the categories is in descending order of importance, the order of the items is semi-random. This list has changed over time, adding and removing items, occasionally changing orders because I can’t remember anything and things going together means it’s more likely I will remember them. The list can change every time I change note files, at which point I copy the list from the previous file and review it. The list is at the top of every note file. Every time I draw I take notes, usually in review, though recently they’ve been more things I’m currently thinking while I’m drawing them. Things which are recurring important themes that I remember to elevate get elevated to the list.

This is a technical point: I use Notepad++ for text. Being able to say “[89]” and be able to refer to the thing I said on line 89, rather than typing all that out again on the current or a different file, makes a lot of things easier. Autotabbing makes it visually clear what idea is a set of what. If you know nothing about coding, learn about “nesting”, it’ll be worth your time. Some things are better faster, or in certain ways. This is a theme.

Also technical: I’ve worked with pencil and paper, and digitally with a Wacom Intuos Pro Med in SAI and CSP. I had a Wacom Bamboo at some distant point. Beyond these my knowledge of mediums in drawing is what I saw in art classes for kids and what I see on Youtube or Twitch from time to time. This pathing has had benefits and costs. This is a theme.

After the list’s items are some things I think are worth opining publicly on that I’ve heard here or there. They are placed at the end not because they’re less important than the list, if anything they’re way more important because if you have paid any attention ever in online art discussions some of this stuff has probably been drilled into you and thus fixing them is paramount. They’re at the end because a) it’s easier for me to say my ideas first, which even if you don’t agree with them becomes easier to see alternatives to standard discourse, b) presenting the other guy first means exactly the opposite of the benefit of a) happens, and c) I don’t like repeating myself. Some things are better repeated less. This is a theme. Also I’m wordy enough as it is.

The following is what appears at the top of my notes file for the week of 20_07_03, lines 1-53. WordPress or HTML have inserted differences of space before/after the two categories and a space between the last item and the linebreak. Otherwise it is identical.

STUDY LIST (review every file!)
what constitutes a drawing?

things i want

intimacy/love / friends/lord
light of god
life as worth living: effort leads to results
peace
sex
production is prereq/servant for research
composition
color theory – esp. skin. giant color shifts also interest.
shape-details – level of abstractions

structure reminders

there is no such thing as a provisional drawing.

Q: “i dont know how to do this”/”this is a problem”, A:”today is the day”
how can i understand what i am doing more clearly to reproduce it more reliably/quickly?
try new things and play with it. imagine a different way things could be done.
improvement is four parts: desire, search (chance), implementation (ideologos), speed (pathing).
heaviest carries usually cost the least. ideal is maximizing followthrough
the important thing is not the line you just drew, but the next line that is now possible
question properly formed gives the right answer: look for different questions, not different answers.
you can’t have all possible choices in the same picture
if you constantly block yourself, then that’s what you will recognize as “good” and “real”.

do things in the order that feels best, not in the order that makes sense.
pulling from ahead is different from pushing from behind

“draw a cool thing” constitutes of “draw”, “cool”, and “thing”. “draw” is one of these things.
details are not extensions, they are existant things.
hierarchy to detail, beauty, and thus also care
if you respect the details, the details will respect you.

studying requires being ready for the thing in question, and looking for it at that time.
stoppage is generally a constraints problem: either excess of irrelevants, or lack of necessities.
what you want is what you will tend to get. so want nice things.
if you ask the big questions, you will tend to get the big answers.

flow = mobility = attention = a river in the jungle
getting to flow: have an idea strong enough that everything is followthrough
staying in flow: keep the idea in mind, find a path to it through what turns out to exist.
flow is probably “every action is important”.
expectations without judgement: most important thing is to keep desire intact
execution is a subset of search: start with what you know

picture relies on you, not you on it.

internal search (what feels right) and external search (what looks right)
emotion, vision, tempo, technicals
shape-details separate from color, emotion-pose-proportions separate from composition

understanding < ability < reach

— — —

The below are my comments and extensions for a slightly broader audience than just me at time of writing.

At some point in the indeterminate future I plan to find and organize and write the true patterns and principles behind them and call it “The Art of Flow” or some such name, but that may be some years away, as it was between the time “The World Beyond Words” was named and the time it was written (and then corrected/extended as “A Mountain In The Jungle”). Or it may not happen at all since crystallizing is itself a big effort and if I actually completely succeed at it, I will probably not write the solution but look to solving the next thing instead. I am writing currently because for the past some days the gods or spirits or some such things have been bothering me to write something about it now. This is what I have, extending it is what I can do now, and so this messy list with some repeats is what I shall do.

— Having finished now, this is as long as AMITJ. Although the below items are not in any particular order, the commentary was written sequentially. It is possible that it makes more sense in an order I didn’t write it, or makes sense just fine jumping around from one list item to the another, but this has really eaten up a lot of my time and I don’t intend to give it significantly more budget so I am not checking those cases.

[1] STUDY LIST (review every file!)

It was originally called “study list” because it was a list of things to study. “rendering styles”, “composition”, “clothing folds”, other technical things.

Studying is important: learning is fundamentally copying. There is nothing new under the sun.

Technicals largely do not appear anywhere in my notes anymore because they largely cannot be named. Put a different way, naming them largely does not help me do the thing I would want it to do. In the first study list one item was “clothing folds”. This is not helpful. What is helpful is another line in the same list: “pidjun stream, “lets draw arknights continued”, 01_18, ~2:08:00, sleeve rendering”. That’s also clothing folds, but it’s actually usable. It is the difference between goods in hand and typing a $ sign.

In the first study list there were also 3 categories: “things to study”, “things to study 2”, and “things to keep in mind at all times”. The first has changed. The second was to be specific places to study things like the stream vod time above, but became too numerous to bother keeping. If I want to learn something now, I just pick some picture that looks alright, seems within my reach, and start looking at it. Seeing a picture for 0.5 seconds is different from 5 seconds, is different from 1 minute, is different from 5 minutes. It is in a very real sense a different picture in each of those durations. The third category is the same, just renamed.

I don’t change the name “study list” because I don’t have a better name and don’t care to look around for one. It serves its purpose fine.

[2] what constitutes a drawing?

This is the question to answer.
It is my understanding that the answer is the skeleton key; the garden of eden.

It’s probably better as “what constitutes drawing”, but this is nitpicking. They are the same thing. Get out what you put in, reap what you sow, etc. It would be very odd if you could do one thing and actually get something else. The world is complicated, but it is not that complicated. It is knowable.

Sometimes I forget it’s there.

[3] things i want

[4] intimacy/love / friends/lord
[5] light of god
[6] life as worth living: effort leads to results
[7] peace
[8] sex

You need to know what you want.

I tried being cute and tricky here at some point, but like technicals they’ve been progressively removed because they do not actually point to or do the things I have them around for. “Everyone wants sex” does not mean they can admit it to themselves. What can you admit to yourself? Honesty aside for a moment, your mind has limited space. What occupies that space is of utmost importance. Drawing between 2014_12 and 2019_10 was spent almost entirely on grinding body parts because what I wanted was to do “something”. “Something” is exactly what I got. If I had wanted “sex”, I would’ve gotten something different. I would’ve at least noticed how much I actually wanted sex, and from that initial query, consider maybe a few other things I want more or less.

These days it is a trope of villains to openly ask the hero what he wants. This is wrong. It is nobles that ask directly what is wanted. It is peasants (villain’s etymology is medieval latin, “villanus”, for “farmhand”) that beat around the bush and play stupid little games. Play stupid little games, win stupid little prizes. There is one audience that’s always there to hear what you have to say, and that audience is you. You are there for everything you do. This is a theme. (All instances of “you” are in fact “me” first and “you” maybe; this applies to everything I or anyone says. You should do this, you should do that – what do I know about you? Who are you? But I know a lot about me. Things that “need to be said” are needed most by the speaker’s two ears.)

It is possible that “What do you want?” is the central question bar none, drawing or not (this is a theme). Perhaps it is more illustrative to model it as “Which god do you serve?”. If more than one god, in what order is your pantheon?

I think beautiful sexy ladies is important, but I’ve tried a few times, and it turns out I don’t actually care too much about seeing them being fucked, or showing off for the same ends. Seeing them do those things is nice, but having to make them do that reveals a different story. I started drawing with women because that was the obvious thing I liked visually. That is what I have now to work with. But the more I’ve done, especially with color, the more I find I care about other things. This is why “sex” is the fifth out of the five verbalized items.

[9] production is prereq/servant for research

I have a tendency of trying to separate improvement and production.

The idea that things can be figured out cleanly and completely before the first step of implementing is wrong. This is true even if you have a complete picture in front of you and are just copying it directly. You cannot do a thing before you do it, any more than you can not do a thing and also be doing it. This means that various technologies, understandings, methods are always incomplete and slightly incongruent with all the other pieces: you know how to do one part well but not the next. Yes. That’s how it is. You will never have a master-planned city, not if you want it to work or be beautiful.

“Research” thus means both making the final result better on some axis (e.g. color, anatomy, etc.), which is the fanciful and somewhat abstract aim, as well as making the various different ideas that come together somehow to make that final result come together more smoothly, which is the more visceral and true aim.

How is this research done? By producing things. There is no way to figure out how to feel better at doing the real thing except by doing the real thing. This applies to technologies too. I recently found out that what constitutes a good hairstyle also includes taking into account the nose, jawline, and ears. I had thought of hair as something plopped on after the head was complete, but that day I was copying a certain character from a certain artist over and over and that on top of vague memories of others told me that it wasn’t possible. I was getting the hair right, everything “hair” was accurate. But something was still wrong. So there had to be a different way. This is a theme.

[10] composition

I thought I liked sexy women and pinups. I like other things more, like dramatic shots. Dramatic shots have something to do with composition.

Visualizing as composition is primarily opposed to visualizing as objects. If you want to have a shot of a person with the lips at the top and upper chest at the bottom, you shouldn’t need to draw the whole torso or the whole head. For a person this doesn’t matter much either way; the cost of a 2~3 rough shapes and then cropping out the rest is negligible for the benefits it conveys. For an environment it seems too costly. It can’t possibly be that the entire space was drawn in 3D first and then cropped or simplified down, it’s too expensive. No one actually draws horizon line first, vanishing points, focal etc. etc., I don’t care what they say, I refuse to believe it. There has to be another way.

Current main idea is they build off the frame of the picture. However vast an environment or dramatic a shot, as a picture it is still a rectangle. If I try moving the rectangle here or there, the feeling changes. Therefore, the first known is the orientation of things relating to the rectangle is important. This thing on the ground here may be the top of a large circle. Can I start by putting a vaguely curved flat line a quarter of the way from the bottom? I can. Is this easier than starting with the horizon line and the cone of vision? It is.

[11] color theory – esp. skin. giant color shifts also interest.

I understand enough of what I’m looking for that I can say “color theory” to myself and remember what it is.

This is not color theory as anyone I’ve heard talk about it except by distant relation. There might be a word or so for what I’m looking for, but a) I doubt it, and b) I’m certainly not finding it by google. Gurney is a good help but his tome isn’t everything. To cover the scope of reality would have a tome for every line in Gurney’s tome, and another tome for every line in that tome. I’m looking for something to do with color and I know what sort of general form it will take. YouTube artist tutorial X can help me at the same chances that I’ll win the lottery: it’s not zero, but I wouldn’t find it because I was looking for it. An older example: for a long time trying to start using colors and even grayscale gave me a huge problem, but everything I found was on “rendering” and “lighting”. I didn’t give a fuck about those. I wanted to know what the fundamental differences and uses of “blobs” were as opposed to “lines”. I’d only ever drawn in lines with pencils and then digitally; what do I do with these “blobs” that can come in different opacities and different sizes? How do I make these “blobs” do what I want? But no one talks about this.

I am so tired of hearing about things to do “if you’re a beginner” / “just starting out”. But we’ll get to that at the end.

[12] shape-details – level of abstractions

“Shape-details” is my personal jargon. If there’s a word out there for it, I’ve never heard about it.

The basic explanation for lighting is one you’ve probably seen; a ball that’s half lit half in shadow and with a number of words and pointers on it. Light, shadow, midtone, terminator, highlight, useless, bureaucracy, checklist. It is my impression that a significant proportion of people come away from this not understanding how to light things because a common indicator of amateur digital art is a very large airbrush over the general region that’s in shadow, esp. if the color of the shadow is just set to black. Shadows don’t look like this, yes. But clearly that’s what people got from the ball explanation because it’s not like they like this result either.

“Shape-details” is my current understanding of lighting. That light things are light and dark things are dark no one needs to be told, that highlights are some angle of incident math physics something something I don’t think anyone actually gives a damn but isn’t actually too big a deal at the moment, and colors are big enough a problem that it’s easier handling semi-independently, so: if we start off with just one level of light and one level of dark, what do we know? I know in anime I like things are commonly two tones, light and dark. What else does anime do about it? Well, looks like they come in hard shapes. Things that don’t “have” hard edges have hard shapes anyways, like triangles in hair or other shapes in clothing folds. It’s difficult to draw lines around fuzzy blobs, but it’s pretty easy to draw lines around shapes. “Shape-details” are all the shapes that aren’t forms or outlines that will be filled in because they are highlights or shadows. They don’t particularly adhere to any rule other than cool, though at the beginning for general guidance and at the end for checking, the general form that is being lit will be considered.

I am probably just retarded and to many people it is obvious this is how you’d approach lighting as babby’s literal first step. I’ve been told I do things pointlessly laboriously, like ‘trimming lawns with scissors’. It’s true. But I also keep track of which stones I’ve turned, and once they’re all turned, the fool has persisted in his folly, and becomes wise. “There has to be another way”.

Or so I’d like to believe, but I actually found it because I’d noticed over the course of some pieces that trying to figure out the final form and final color/value in the same step felt really mushy and time-consuming so I’d try out separating them, with the final form coming first. I liked it. There are some things I don’t like about it, but it’s currently as a base to improve rather than as a foreign opponent.

It’s probably cheaper to notice that even with real life things things are pretty flat and simple most of the time. If you look at a person and think about what you see, they don’t have a billion hairs on their head, they have hair. Their belt or pants around their waist makes an approximately flat line, so you curve a flat line rather than trying to flatten a cylinder ‘because waists are cylindrical’. A lot of shadows on their body are basically hard shapes, clothing folds generally don’t matter. This requires having achieved final victory over the realism demon or having never encountered it. If you don’t have this, but lighting makes sense cheaply some other way, then it’s probably because I’m retarded, or at least retarded on this topic. Or it’s my tendency to trim lawns with scissors. “Or” means both. This is a theme.

“Level of abstraction” is older personal jargon. It refers to levels of simplification (from realism) where all components make an acceptable result, e.g. realistic hair works okay with anime faces, but the other way around basically doesn’t. Shape-details are inside that structure. Three other obvious levels of abstraction to using shape-details for lighting are are: lighting only major forms, broad airbrush, and simply single tone for everything and not bothering with shadows.

[13] structure reminders

“Training deals not with an object but with the human spirit and human emotions.”

The Tao of Jeet Kune Do
Bruce Lee

[14] there is no such thing as a provisional drawing.

Everything is always for real and everything has always been for real.

It is better to think of all drawings as for real than to think you can hide certain things by not showing it publicly, or not drawing it, or not [something]. All drawings are for real. There is always at least one audience that sees everything and from that audience you cannot hide.

Provisionalism, or as is more hip to say these days, “Simulation”ism, is how learning stops. I’ve known for a long time that copying is the path of improvement, but I’ve copied many things and didn’t get much from them because when things didn’t turn out well, or worse, when they did turn out well, at the time I was doing it I said to myself “it’s just a copy”. “It’s just practice”. Same with the years spent grinding various body parts. I should be a master at least at those parts, but I’m not. Part of this is because memory fades, but a lot of it was because I didn’t take it seriously.

The idea was, when I want to make something, I will be able to put all these parts together perfectly. Note this is not a true premise in itself, integration is itself a skill (an “art”), but for entertainment we can grant it. That was still 5 years spent making a total of 10 pieces. Are there only 10 things I would’ve wanted to do in that time? Every day I spent getting good at “anatomy” was a day I spent not making a full woman I wanted to see. What is the desired ratio between seeing more beautiful women drawn, and making any particular one or any particular part more beautiful? This is a question. The clock is ticking. The clock will always be ticking, and every tick you are standing on your answer.

Take yourself seriously.

“To think that a man has but 50 years to live under heaven. Surely this world is nothing but a vain dream.”

Oda Nobunaga
A Chef of Nobunaga

“Normally, those people would never wake up from their fantasy worlds.
They live meaningless lives.
They waste their precious days over nothing.
No matter how old they get, they’ll continue to say,

“My real life hasn’t started yet. The real me is still asleep, so that’s why my life is such garbage.”

They continue to tell themselves that.
They continue.
And they age.
Then die.

And on their deathbeds, they will finally realize: the life they lived was the real thing.

People don’t live provisional lives, nor do they die provisional deaths. That’s a simple fact! The problem… is whether they realize that simple fact.”

Tonegawa
Kaiji: Gambling Apocalypse

[15] Q: “i dont know how to do this”/”this is a problem”, A:”today is the day”

The day before Jacktober I decided I would make one drawing every day, even if it was a stick figure. The first day of jacktober I wanted to remake a meme, which was in color. The end of the first day I decided every day would be in color. Obviously it would not be a stick figure, I can do that in under a minute. The time allotted is a day, or more than a day, if I work ahead. There is more I can do. What can I do? Well, one of those things is now color. How do I color? I don’t know. Why don’t we find out?

“Today” was traditionally an adverb.

[16] how can i understand what i am doing more clearly to reproduce it more reliably/quickly?

The simpler and more elegant understand is better because it saves time. There is a realm of useful ideas that lives and dies long before standard ideas can run out their results. This pattern is fractal: the puresr and more effective thoughts are, the less they can be verbalized, even in our own minds. They are ever more fleeting. They can only be observed, and at some point, the only hope is the hope to be able to observe.

If one attempts to verbalize them, it comes out as an unending mess. Like this post.

“The next point is when we try to guess a new law, whether we should use the seat-of-the-pants feeling and philosophical principles. “I don’t like the minimum principle”, or “I do like the minimum principle”. Or “I don’t like action at a distance” or “I do like action at a distance”. The question is to what extent do models help. And it’s a very interesting thing. Very often models help, and most physics teachers try to teach how to use these models and get a “good physical feel” as to how things are gonna work out.

But the greatest discoveries, it always turns out, abstract away from the model, it never did any good. Maxwell’s discovery of electrodynamics was first made with a lot of imaginary wheels and idlers and everything else in space. If you got rid of all the “idlers and everything else in space”, the thing was okay. Dirac discovered the correct laws of quantum mechanics simply by guessing the equation. And the method of simply guessing the equation seems to be a pretty effective way of guessing new laws. This shows again that mathematics is a deep way of expressing nature, and attempts to express nature in philosophical principles or in seat-of-the-pants mechanical feeling is not an efficient way.

I must say it’s possible, and I’ve often made the hypothesis, that physics will ultimately not require a mathematical statement. That the machinery will ultimately be revealed, just like one of these other prejudices.

It always bothers me, that in spite of all this “local” business, what goes on in no matter how tiny a region of space and no matter how tiny a region of time, according to the laws as we understand them today, takes a computing machine an infinite number of logical operations to figure out. Now, how could all that be going on in that tiny space? Why should it take an infinite amount of logic to figure out what one stinky little bit of space-time is going to do?”

The Character of Physical Law
Richard Feynman

“The priest Tannen used to say, “People come to no understanding because priests teach only the doctrine of ‘No Mind.’ What is called ‘No Mind’ is a mind that is pure and lacks complication.” This is interesting.

Lord Sanenori said, “In the midst of a single breath, where perversity cannot be held, is the Way.” If so, then the Way is one.

But there is no one who can understand this clarity at first. Purity is something that cannot be attained except by piling effort upon effort.”

Hagakure
Yamamoto Tsunetomo

[17] try new things and play with it. imagine a different way things could be done.

rin luvia useful assumption
ilya don't think imagine

Prisma Ilya

[18] improvement is four parts: desire, search (chance), implementation (ideologos), speed (pathing).

I don’t remember how I came to this. I have the notes and I have something that can search files but I’m not going to look for it. It’d take forever if I did that for every one of these because I literally have all the records.

The primary thing this counters is that improvement comes via determination or time. I’m all for having the right telos but the standard narrative here is dickwaving and chest-pounding. Improvement itself has a structure, and that structure was not taught at school no matter how much people like to say they teach you “how to learn to learn”. No, you didn’t.

Determination is “desire”.

Time is one of two parts in “Search”. There are some things you just won’t find, the chance is too low, it was not ordained for you, etc. You are going to make do with what you can find in the time you spent looking, or you won’t do anything at all.

“Ideologos” is the logic between ideas. That is the short version and probably sufficient for most purposes. The many different things you believe have to work together, and making them work together is itself a skill. The slightly longer than short version is in bits and pieces throughout this post. The long version is “A Mountain In the Jungle”.

“Pathing” is how it’s done at the time it’s being done. I believe the popular word these days for this concept is “tacit knowledge”, but this glorifies “knowledge” and thus I don’t like it. This stuff is not “knowledge, except it can’t be said”. You might as well say “fire, except not hot”. Just say something else. I think “pathing” is a good word. Where things are for me is to a large extent known by my feet.

Oh I remember the thing that preceded this now.

“all things that can be done are easy. there is no specific value in toil and suffering, the value is in purpose. things that are done are done by people who find it the easiest to do that rather than anything else.

have you ever seen anything that inspired you? has anything that inspired you, been remembered, even 10 years later?

that was done.

therefore that can be done.

find the path.”

[19] heaviest carries usually cost the least. ideal is maximizing followthrough

If you are thinking about something a lot, it is probably not going to be the most valuable piece.

[20] the important thing is not the line you just drew, but the next line that is now possible

There’s a number of things condensed in here, I don’t remember them all.
– Certain lines cannot be found before other lines are in place.
– All drawings are for real, there is no point in rejecting the past.
– Emotions are information. Bad emotions are not failure, they show the way by their opposition.
– Look ahead not behind.

[21] question properly formed gives the right answer: look for different questions, not different answers.

One time I was trying to figure out how to make clean lines without spending so much time. The archetype reached was the shape of “T”. Two lines are intersecting, one stops at the other, question: How to make the one that stops, stop at the right point, rather than overshooting or undershooting? Overshooting means erasing, which means hitting up against the other line; undershooting means obvious gap. The people I asked said I was overthinking it. I didn’t think so, since that’s what my lines were doing. I believe it was suggested to make lines thicker, which would be a solution but I didn’t like it, or to not worry about it, it’s not like perfectly clean lines are actually real, which I understand the concept of, but that’s not what I was seeing as my results, or feeling as I was drawing it.

The solution came offhand when talking with an art streamer and he mentioned how he doesn’t use stabilizers. Stabilizers are digital corrections for wobbly lines, the feeling of which is that the line becomes very heavy: they are hard to turn and hard to stop. I had forgotten I turned stabilizers on and turned them up; at the time it was the obvious solution for making plastic on plastic feel more like pencil on paper. After a short time trying it out as a solution, this largely solved the real problem. Starting and stopping became a lot more precise, precise enough that it didn’t matter. There were some other tweaks that also helped this that are not important to discuss, but they were also “unrelated” technicals.

The essence of search is imagination, not logic.

[22] you can’t have all possible choices in the same picture

One picture shows one thing in one way.
If you want something different, you will have to draw another picture.

I should note just in case it helps: the length of comment I have for any particular line isn’t proportional to how important it is. Generally if I have a lot to say about something it’s because it’s missing some component. If it is perfect and important, usually I say nothing (unless I happen to have a story). All of this is “structure reminders”: stuff for which I don’t need to remind myself of, or which I can’t find a verbalization for, have no entries.

[23] if you constantly block yourself, then that’s what you will recognize as “good” and “real”.

It is said that artists of any field tend to be moody people.

This is me imploring you to do that. You need to think of yourself as moody.

Just as whatever you intend to draw will appear on the page, so will your emotions. More importantly, certain emotions make certain things possible. Put another way, there will be times you can’t do something you were able to do some other time, and a good number of those times is going to be because you felt a certain way. You have feelings about how this or that works. You have feelings about the day or your place in the world. All of this matters to what comes out on the page. If you cannot recognize emotions as a higher power or as a deeper compass, you will run around cargo culting unrelated solutions to the real and usually simple problem. “All the low hanging fruit has been picked” is cope. This year I discovered off a miso soup bag a new way to open plastic bags. I didn’t believe it until I followed the instructions on the bag. And yet there it was. The brand is Marukome. There is always some other simple improvement to do.

It is worded this way because the most common problem for me is self-blockage. It may be a different problem for you. Almost all the time the reason why I do something I don’t want to do is because some other part of me is stopping it, saying “but” and then some large number of reasons – that I don’t actually care about. It’s usually “but what will other people think”.

A popular example I’m aware of would be skinny women with large titties: “But where are her organs?”. The correct answer is “I uh don’t give a damn”. The best answer is to draw more skinny women with large titties. If you are in this general area, the titties are large and the waists are small because that makes the pp the big pp and what makes the pp big is what is king. Things like organ placement may be vaguely important to you, but that’s a decision you make, not others (note: “question” and “decision” are synonyms). If you feel the waist could use some width, add some width. If not, don’t.

This principle extends. The example here is crude ‘because’ it’s popular, there’s already standard terminology for it. The closer you get to real problems the less words you are going to have for them. Big titties and missing organs are at the level of shapes: broadly, boobs versus ribcage. But it’s not actually only those two. Just as nose jawline ears inform hair, so too do other parts of the body inform boob size. The ones important to me are head size and arm width. There is nowhere this principle ends. You should strive to find out how each stroke feels to the next. Putting down the instrument at the start and pulling up at the end feels different physically, why shouldn’t it feel different emotionally too? This is something you can’t rely on others for.

Anything that has standard terminology is dead fish.

“I don’t like Facebook Trending’s way of talking about popular things on the internet as “surfacing”. It feels like a wrong and misleading way to talk about it. Not just the internet, but any information network in general.

The “web” visualization makes a lot of sense, and a “sea” is fine too, as long as the idea is that you’re a fish and not a surfer. “Surfacing” in a “web” is nonsensical; “surfacing” as a fish basically means you’ve been dead for a while. Which is actually correct some of the time, especially when they’re talking about normalfags catching onto memes, but in general it’s not the right word to use, especially not for information that’s on the tip of everyone’s tongues.

“Viral” is overused, but fairly accurate. The operative concept is that an idea has enough penetration to go through multiple number and types of networks at an abnormal speed. Other words that work are “hot” and “electric”; heat and electricity are understood to go through just about everything.

Then again, Trending is trying to become news, and news is about dead fish, so I guess they’re accurate.”

“I’ll go ahead and download it.”

“Why don’t you buy paper books? E-books lack character.”

“Is that right?”

“Books are not something that you just read words in. They’re also a tool to adjust your senses.

“Adjust?”

“When I’m not feeling well, there are times that I can’t take in what I read. When that happens, I try to think about what could be hindering my reading. There are also books that I can take in smoothly even when I’m not feeling well. I try to think why.

It might be something like mental tuning.

What’s important when you tune is the feeling of the paper you’re touching with your fingers, and the momentary stimulation your brain receives when you turn the page.”

“I feel kinda discouraged. When I talk to you, I feel like I’ve been missing out on something all my life.”

“You’re reading into it too much.”

Choe Guseong, Makishima Shougo
Psycho-Pass

“Ted Holman, a Team Leader in the body shop, argued this way:

“I don’t think IEs are dumb. They’re just ignorant. Anyone can watch someone else doing a job and come up with improvement suggestions that sound good. But they don’t usually take into account all the little things that explain why, from the worker’s point of view, they couldn’t work. And it’s even easier to come up with the ideal procedure if you don’t even bother to watch the worker at work, but just do it from your office, on paper. Almost anything can look good that way. Even when we do our own analysis in our teams, some of the silliest ideas can slip through before we try it out.

There’s a lot of things that enter into a good job design. Little things can make a big difference, like how high or low the stock is placed or how the tools are organized or where the hoses are. The person actually doing the job is the only one who can see all those factors. And in the U.S., engineers have never had to work on the floor – not like in Japan. So they don’t know what they don’t know.

In the typical U.S. plant, you never even saw the IE – they stayed in their cozy offices upstairs. They never talked to workers about how to improve their jobs.

Today, we drive the process, and if we need their help, the engineer is there the next day to work on it with us.”

Smith put this contrast in a broader perspective:

“In most plants, management assumes the “divine right” to design jobs as they see fit. And in the U.S. auto industry, workers have historically agreed to that in exchange for higher wages. Management was willing to pay a ton of money to the workers to preserve its prerogative.

But in practice, the old way of setting standards was just ridiculous. An Industrial Engineer would shut himself away in an isolated office and consider how long it took for somebody to twist their wrist and move their arm in such and such a way, and calculate from some manual and try that way to come up with a task design. The IE would take this “properly” designed job to the foreman. The foreman would not his head, but then said “screw you” to the IE’s back and redesigned the task to his own liking. Then he’d take his task design to the worker and said “Do it this way or you’re out.” The worker would not but would pull the same trick on the foreman. In the end, the job got done however the worker could. When the boss walked by, the worker might pretend to do the job the way the foreman had told him. Everybody involved knew this was going on but no one cared to do anything about it.

Multiply that game by the number of shifts and the number of different people involved and you’ve got a process you can’t control. You can’t build a quality car like that. You can’t even go back and improve the process, because the IE lives in dream world, doesn’t have a clue how the job is actually done, and doesn’t have any impact. The foreman’s impact is also zip. Nobody talks to the worker even though he’s the one guy who can do something about the problem. Nobody wants to listen to him. That’s basically how most of the auto industry operates even today.

So you can see why standardized work is so revolutionary.

And why most IEs are pretty uncomfortable with it!””

The ‘Learning Bureaucracy’
Paul S. Adler

[26] do things in the order that feels best, not in the order that makes sense.

“Makes sense” usually means closer to a verbalized system.
In event of conflict, the default winner should not be the verbalized system.

[27] pulling from ahead is different from pushing from behind

Carrot and stick are not interchangeable. Each has their use.
You will notice how you treat yourself eventually.

[29] “draw a cool thing” constitutes of “draw”, “cool”, and “thing”. “draw” is one of these things.

There is something I tend to forget and this is one way to remind myself of that thing.

A common way of thinking about drawing and imagination is that there is some fully formed idea ‘on the other side’ and the only problem is “I’m not in the mood” (coincidentally they don’t take emotions seriously) or “I don’t know how to do it”. The latter means something like if their brain was hooked up to a computer it would just exist. This is a nonsense model. Computers aren’t magic, not matter how black box they may appear to you. If something like hooking up a brain existed, someone would’ve had to design that hardware, someone else would’ve had to design that software. You would still hadveto interface with it. The difficulty would not be zero, it would be lowered. How much lower? Nowhere near as much as you think. I’m sure people in the past thought the same of computers too. Working with paints on canvas has so many more difficulties than tablet on computer, the most obvious one being it’s financially more difficult. How many more artists now exist? A lot. Infinitely more? No. I’m here writing this aren’t I?

As much as I am trying to make this technically- and field- independent, these are all results of my technical knowledge and background. All things are results of technical implementation, and we should be careful to remember it exists. There are things we have and have not done, and they allow us certain ideas.

Example: Recently I drew some clouds. Before that, I couldn’t imagine how they would be done. When I think of clouds, I think of the clouds I see in Ace Combat. How could I make something like those videogame clouds on a canvas? I couldn’t. Not with the tools I had. Or so I thought, but then I decided to google “how to paint clouds” or something like that, and saw some old woman with paint brushes and a canvas mix up a few opaque colors and then just do it. Clouds aren’t opaque? I mean, I guess. But there were things that looked like clouds on her canvas, I could do what she did on my digital canvas, this is better than whatever I had before, what more can I ask? This isn’t to say I can’t ask for more, but the question is always “compared to what”, and a lot of things can’t be compared to until you try them out, and they usually don’t follow any logic expected beforehand.

Example: My experience with color has largely been with 100% opacity round brushes digitally. In other words, most colors on my pictures are picked directly. How I get details is via the aforementioned “shape-details”: I decide on what little triangles I’m going to make shadows beforehand. Problem: This doesn’t work for things like clouds or trees or anything with “organic” forms or “realistic” texture. It can’t do texture at all unless I really want to draw out every little detail. Counterexample: I saw a guy post his watercolor process for coloring trees and bushes. He said he used a sponge. He colored the thing with a sponge, something with texture itself, via watercolor, which naturally varies in amount of color somehow, rather than using a round brush with opaque paint. It probably wasn’t colored in one action, but however many actions it took him, it’s definitely under the 50~1000 it’d take me. It’s a lot less direct control, but how much direct control do we actually want? “But sponge brushes are available digitally too” Yes. And I have not used them.

“Cool” is a ‘language’. “Thing” is a ‘language’ ([10]). “Drawing” is a ‘language’. If you word it a different way, you may see a drawing as a combination of a different set of things.

I word it this way because this line is for remembering a certain thing.

“For thousands of years, people have scoured the earth looking for brightly colored materials to make into paint. Most intense colors in plants and animals fade immediately. An ideal pigment must be permanent, plentiful, and nonpoisonous.

[…] Since art’s beginnings, a few reliable color ingredients have been readily available to artists. Blacks, reds, and yellows were easy to find; that’s why they appear in all “primitive” art. Black paint made from charcoal or burnt bones dates back to prehistoric times. The brownish reds and oranges of iron oxides have been dug out of natural open pits. Siena, Italy, gave its name of ore-based pigments that were used burnt or raw.

Reliably violets, magentas, and blues were rare. The togas of Roman emperors used a pigment known as Tyrian purple, made from a color-producing cyst made from a whelk. It took 12,000 mollusks to make 1.4 grams of pure dye. The rarity of purple made it the color of royalty. The crimson used in the red coats of the British military, Catholic cardinals’ robes, and many modern lipsticks originates from a fluid in tiny insects that live as parasites on catcus plants. Those bugs were worth more than their weight in gold to the Spanish, and the processes were kept absolutely secret.

The most expensive pigment of all was a fine blue made from lapis lazuli, a mineral mined in Afghanistan. Getting a supply required a long voyage “ultramarinus”, or “beyond the sea.” For this reason, the old masters reserved ultramarine for the Madonna’s robes.”

Color & Light – A Guide for the Realist Painter
James Gurney

“One of my favorite stories about my wife and myself, when we were in New Jersey, our breakfast table was right next to some windows looking on the garden. We’re having breakfast prior to me going to work. And she says, “Dick, it’s raining.” I look at her and think “What’s wrong with her? She must know that I can see it’s raining”. Then I say to myself, what did she really say?

What she said was: “I’ve had my second cup of coffee and I’m fit to talk to.”

I spent much of that day at Bell Labs watching how much of what we say is not what it appears to be. And it is amazing. The enormous amount of how much of what we say is literally not correct. No way. So the language has a great deal of thing of things more than what you think; our natural language has a great deal of features, which in a language to a computer would not have to have.

Well we have not studied the problem. When I heard the Japanese were planning to write fifth generation computers, the speed was alright, but when they were going to do AI to do things, I thought they would not succeed. And they didn’t. Because they were not profoundly studying the nature of language. And until we do, we will get language like ADA, which are logically alright, but they don’t fit the human analogue to do the kinds of things that a human animal does with language.

Now I point out there are two languages: there is you to the machine, and the machine back to you. They need not be the same language. You want a terse one in, and you’re willing to put up with a rather verbose one coming out. Frequently what comes out is so terse you can’t figure out what it means, and you’re willing to settle with a lot more printout – but not too much. It’s a problem of designing language to communicate ideas to machines.

But unfortunately we don’t know what ideas are, so we don’t know how to do it.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

[30] details are not extensions, they are existant things.
[31] hierarchy to detail, beauty, and thus also care
[32] if you respect the details, the details will respect you.

There is an idea popular these days that all art has the same “fundamentals”: anatomy, perspective, color theory, etc. Pareto principle: 20 carries 80, fundamentals are that 20, if you learn fundamentals well your art will be 80% of the way there. Get the simple things right, they will pay off, the other stuff doesn’t matter or will follow through naturally on their own.

This idea, or this form of idea, is very attractive to me. This idea is wrong. 20/80 and efficiency concepts in general should be used carefully, especially because the current culture has efficiency as god you can overdo it without noticing it. The two broad problems with 20/80 is a) it’s not actually useful in the ways it’s generally thought of as useful and b) it’s recursive into oblivion.

A face takes up at max 1/2 the head, the head is 1/5~1/8 the height of the body depending on what you prefer, by area it’s let’s say (and this is generous) 1/20. The face is thus 1/40 of the body, or ~3%. Eyes take up some small percentage of the face. Of the body, eyes are therefore somewhere in the 0.1%~0.01% range. And yet, the eyes they carry most of the soul. Does this mean making the eyes larger means more soul? A bit. But you’re going to be doing it at the cost of other things. If you make the eyes a significant proportion of the body, like it is with chibis, you must shrink the fingers and hands. Fingers are a large part of emotion. There are certain things you can’t express with just a face. Chibis can’t use fingers, nor can they use the back, and they don’t have a center of gravity. Chibis have no boobs, so you “can’t” have “soul” and “sexy”. 20/80 is true on any given axis. But the other four 20’s in that 80 carry their own 80 on other axes. 20/80 is a pretty good thing to keep in mind for solving problems because usually even great problems have simple and small solutions, but it’s usually invoked for efficiency and cutting away “waste”.

The less remembered second half of the 20/80 story is the ant colony story. In any colony, 20% of the ants do most of the work, 30% carry their weight, and 50% are slackers. What happens when you remove the 50% that are slackers? 50% of the remaining colony automatically become slackers. Why? It doesn’t matter. What matters is this is the way the world is.

If you don’t respect the details, the details won’t respect you.

If you do respect the details, they will reward you according to the respect you give.

“Listen, Kousei. You mustn’t play so violently.

The piano is you.

If you touch it gently, it will smile. If you pound it with force, it will become enraged. Touch it like you’re caressing a baby’s head.

Alright, one more time.”

Arima Saki
Your Lie in April

[34] studying requires being ready for the thing in question, and looking for it at that time.

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

[35] stoppage is generally a constraints problem: either excess of irrelevants, or lack of necessities.

Version of “question properly formed gives the right answer” more specialized for flow.

[36] what you want is what you will tend to get. so want nice things.
[37] if you ask the big questions, you will tend to get the big answers.

The canvas is a mirror.

It’s said that the more people age, the more everyone gets the face they deserve.

Teleology is real.

[39] flow = mobility = attention = a river in the jungle
[40] getting to flow: have an idea strong enough that everything is followthrough
[41] staying in flow: keep the idea in mind, find a path to it through what turns out to exist.
[42] flow is probably “every action is important”.

There are drawings where no matter what I do or how long I spend, it still won’t be good. There are other drawings where I get to a certain point and don’t see anything else to do. Then, there are drawings where after a certain point, I could continue on it forever, and no matter what I do – and everything I’d do would be play – it will only get better. This is the highest state of flow: if in a drawing I get to and can stabilize flow, I know I have won.

Flow is the current crown prince to throne of “What constitutes a drawing”. More succintly:

“Flow” is the name of the king.

There are any number and types of things that are required for flow. I’m not sure what the first or most important step is, but I can say that something that came up repeatedly before flow was the idea that all of my problems had something to do with mental state. This is to say they weren’t technical problems in essence. Technical solutions are necessary but not sufficient. You are probably not happy if you are hungry, but being full will not make you happy.

The most important component of flow is probably teleology.

You have to want the right thing. There are actually right and wrong things to want. Maybe not in the “objective morality” sense, but there are patterns to things, and the more I pay attention the more the old religious texts sound correct, or at least have the correct forms that a correct answer would take (which suggests their answers are also more correct). There are things you want, “independent” of mood. You the conscious you are a mouse riding an elephant. The elephant is the unconscious you, there is something you live for, and the more you do what that is, the better you will be / at the thing. Finding out and putting a name on what that is is very helpful but not necessary, nor sufficient.

Opposing is the current popular “technology”, the idea that you can and should be able to do things without wanting to do them. I believe this is called “mechanistic philosophy”, or at least I heard that term in college taking a Renaissance to Enlightenment history class (note: I hate college. There’s like three ideas I learned there, and this was one of them). Once robots were compared to men, now men are to robots. As long as all the right objects have the right forces applied to them, the same results should be achieved. This is wrong. Technos is subservient to telos. It should be obvious enough that paychecks on time are insufficient just from looking at retail employee turnover rates. People don’t quit jobs, they quit bosses: if the leader doesn’t care or thinks poorly of his subordinates, they will know, and they will respond accordingly. People who work in politics or pornography look like demons. Why? Coincidence? Is life a series of unrelated events? That’s what technology says, and it’s clearly not true. Lest it be said that all this stuff I’m talking about is people and not technology (as if inb4 was a complete rebuttal- well, we can entrain it:), Africans have been buying Soviet military jets and tanks for decades, but no one one ever fears African militaries. Why? They can’t use them. They can’t do everything else in a military to get to a point that a jet or a tank would be useful. Similarly, Americans can’t use Japanese factories. And you probably can’t use most of the ideas I’ve talked about here. The technology rebuttal would be that Africans or Americans or you are just lacking some “prerequisite” technology. Africans are just lacking military doctrine or maintenance discipline. Yes, I agree. Those would solve their problems. Question: Assuming you get paid for it either way, is military doctrine and maintenance discipline something that can be given to them with a book, or a consulting gig? No, right? You can’t make the horse drink. How are these and other things obtained, then? Teleology: wanting the thing. I used to think it was ludicrous artists when asked for advice would say “just draw things you like” rather than anatomy or perspective tips or whatever. Now, I see they were right. Without specific knowledge of who they’re talking to, that is actually the best thing to say. Teleology is real.

The second most important is ideologos, which we’ve mentioned before. You need a logic to traverse your different ideas so you can recall the one you need the way you need it at the time you need it. I suspect it’s probably possible to do without an ideologos and I need it only because I am both ‘autistic’ and can’t remember anything. If you can hold a bunch of disparate ideas and use them all well without them tripping over yourself, you’re fine; that’s the purpose of having one anyways.

Beyond this there’s the idea of paying attention to how you feel, which has been a theme.

Each of items these is at least one dimension, and the number of dimensions that need to align to reach flow is higher than anyone can consciously conceive. In this space there is a territory, and the task is to find the path between the current position and the desired position that is enjoyable.

I don’t have that map. I can only tell a story or three and hope that I’ve done my part.

The map provided by psychology on the dimensions of “challenge” and “skill” I can explain a bit though. I don’t think all eight are important, the quadrants suffice. The solution – read: path to flow – to boredom is to decide to look more into the most interesting thing of the bunch, or peruse other people’s works and pick out whatever strikes you first. The solution to relaxation is adding more things to the picture and trying to keep the same feeling/balance. The solution to anxiety is exactly or thereabouts [20], [15], and [43].

The solution to flow is continuing to believe in yourself.

the flow chart

“A good player tries to read out such tactical problems in his head before he puts the stones on the board. He looks before he leaps. Frequently he does not leap at all; many of the sequences his reading uncovers are stored away for future reference, and in the end never carried out. This is especially true in a professional game, where the two hundred or so moves played are only the visible part of an iceberg of implied threats and possibilities, most of which stays submerged. You may try to approach the game at that level, or you may, like most of us, think your way from one move to the next as you play along, but in either case it is your reading ability more than anything else that determines your rank.”

Tesuji
James Davies

“There are two types of societies. This isn’t a theory of evolution, or about which is better than which.

There are societies that respect their relationship with nature, and others that do not. This is about how societies view change.

The native people of Canada tried not to break the bones of salmon they ate, and returned the bones to the rivers. Native people from eastern and western parts of Russia decorated the skulls of the seals they captured and dismantled, and returned them to the master of the sea along with their poetries. They thought fur and meat were gifts from the animals as a proof of their friendship, and they returned those gifts by adding spiritual values to the bones. They showed their respect towards nature through their meals. This is because they thought the true form of animals were gods who wore the skins of animals. Because they wanted the gods to visit them again, they served by giving back to them respectfully. There are similar beliefs in Northern Eurasian and North American cultures, and many myths remain.

But in modern day Japan, there probably aren’t that many people who still believe that animals are able to talk and that gods live inside of them. They’re looking down on nature. They see animals as something they can naturally steal from, and if they feel like they took a little too much from it – they can just start protecting them. That’s how they see it.

When did that kind of arrogant society form…?

The key factor is the appearance of technology.

Specifically, weapons made of iron.

After obtaining these excellent weapons, man’s respect towards animals faded. In the tales told around Sakhalin, there is a verse that says, “Swords that cut extraordinarily well were passed on from Japan, and after that, bears were killed easily”. A certain individual born in a heretical land one day realized: this is a weapon that god gave, but it is a weapon able to kill god.

The origin of the word technology is the Greek word “Techne”.

“Techne” means “to artificially draw out the blessings that an object is hiding”.

A good example is heating up a rock and taking the iron out of it.

The sword and technology stolen from god gave man power that even gods will fear. For them to visit again, giving back to them respectfully… there’s no need for such things anymore.

Now, we can simply take everything.”

Ch. 148 – “Human Society – The Grave of Bears”
Terra Formars

“You know, they never prohibited us from walking through the plant, understanding, even asking questions of some of their key people. I’ve often puzzled over that– why they did that. And I think they recognized, we were asking all the wrong questions. We didn’t understand this bigger picture thing.

All of our questions were focused on the floor, the assembly plant, what’s happening on the line. That’s not the real issue.

The issue is, how do you support that system with all the other functions that have to take place in the organization?”

Ernie Schaefer
This American Life #561: NUMMI 2015

“You build 3-dimensional things. The design space [however] is n-dimensional. You design in n-dimensional space, one dimension for every parameter you can adjust. Therefore it is not 3-dimensional space that matters in design, it is n-dimensional space.

And n-dimensional space is vast. Very, very large.

To convince you of this, I will start by your own experience. You think you know 3-dimensional space, but you really don’t. You are really familiar with 2 dimensions. In 2 dimensions, a random walk will come back to the same place: if you meet a person, there’s a good chance you’ll meet them again.

In 3 dimensions, that is not true. In 3 dimensions, say the ocean where the fish live, what do they do? They go around on the bottom, they go around on the surface, they go around in schools, they assemble at the mouth of a river. They cannot wander the open ocean and hope to find a mate. That’s how vast 3 dimensions is. You can wander around 2 dimensions and sure enough, you can get a mate. Probably. In 3 dimensions, not a very good chance.

In higher ones, forget it.

But that is the space of design. You’re out there in that tremendously vast space.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

[43] expectations without judgement: most important thing is to keep desire intact

Solution to anxiety.

[44] execution is a subset of search: start with what you know

Convergent evolution to ‘production vs research’ and ‘no such thing as provisional’.

Over time the idea that execution and search are different things has gone from obvious, to suspect, to ludicrous. There are things you simply cannot know before you do them. They are unknowable.

People think that “unknowable” or this sort of area means that it could never be figured out by anyone, but this is a very naive, useless, and probably dickstroking way of conceiving it. A knowable thing has to be knowable at the time it needs to be known. It’s fucking useless to literally everyone except anklebiting bootlickers to say that, at some point in the far future, it can be deciphered that this other path was actually a better solution. “Far future” doesn’t have to be 100 years, it can be 100 hours, or 100 seconds. If in the course of drawing, which itself is a matter of dancing through a number of dimensions you cannot hope to ever fully consciously conceive, you see a glimpse something, but the cost you have to pay to reach it is 100 minutes, guess what? You aren’t reaching it. Not this time. You will forget how to find it, and if you try to look for it again, you will ruin the whole drawing. What is the point in calling such a thing knowable? “Unknowable” requires only that sufficient analysis cannot be completed by the relevant actor in time to create the desired advantage from its results.

Many things can only be seen after you get to the step immediately before. As with most true things, this is fractal.

The question then is whether execution is a subset of search or if search is a subset of execution. I’m not a clean thinker so these sound about the same to me; I picked off of feeling. For production and research it was empirical: separate got me stuck, “production serves research” gives me something that makes some sense, and “research serves production” doesn’t (yet) make sense so I can’t do it.

It’d probably be better if I was a clean thinker, but this is what I have to work with. I’ve heard of some ways to clean up but it feels like it’s pretty costly and also mostly an error-fixing thing. It doesn’t offer new ideas. Throwing words together that ‘shouldn’t’ fit and getting ideas with the cost of tripping over myself in big ways now and again still sounds like the better deal right now, thanks.

[46] picture relies on you, not you on it.

If you are feeling bad about what you’ve done, you are the one that can fix it. It can’t fix itself. Drawings are your children. Accept them. They rely on you. You can take pride in them and love them more if they achieve something, but their mistakes are yours. If it can’t be fixed, then it can’t be fixed. That means that it’s something telling you how to make the next one better. It’s never something there for you to hate.

[48] internal search (what feels right) and external search (what looks right)

If there is one piece of advice I’d give to anyone, it is “copy more”.

“There are things you simply cannot know before you do them”: Other people have done things. They have taken paths. You may not understand or agree with all the steps and decisions they made, but their result is something that exists. My dad has a saying: “If I tell you, it’s simple. If I don’t, you can go your whole life not knowing it exists.” Other people show you what else is possible. If you copy these people, that is to say, attempt to replicate under your own logic those same results, you will find out just how vastly different and unknown the world is. This is true even if you copy someone under your skill level. This is true even if you trace. I believe the religious way to say this is “you will learn to fear God”.

People who denigrate tracing, or copying in general, are idiots. Do you really think that someone with no idea of lineweighting, who’s never thought about how they hold a pencil, can trace something and have it come out the same? If you do, you have no taste, no humility, you have given up on being better; stop having opinions. Sometimes I wonder if people were better at this before the prevalence of digital technology, but no, it’s ancient. Western civilization has the Ship of Theseus, one of the worst concepts bar none, and it is a question: Theseus has a Ship, and parts of it get replaced over time, when is it no longer the Ship of Theseus? Supposed to be like some deep philosophical trick question or some shit, but here is the Answer: It’s Ship of Theseus as long as we continue to try to keep maintaining it as the Ship of Theseus. Yeah at some point it’s no longer the same wood. So what? What’s the number of days it takes for your body to completely replace all cells? Don’t tell me, I don’t care. You shouldn’t care either. It matters only that that number is smaller than your life up to this point, which it is.

The reminder here is the proper domains of both. A drawing is a production, “not” an object. Internal search is “drawing from imagination”, external search is “drawing from reference”. A reference will tell you what looks right, but it won’t tell you how to get there in a nice way. Drawing from imagination will naturally be constrained by your habits and experience: you will find things that fit those, and not find things that don’t. Ideally something looks right after it’s made and feels right while it’s being made. In my experience this is not possible to any appreciable degree without doing both internal and external search each time.

“So it isn’t the original building?” I had asked my Japanese guide.
“But yes, of course it is,” he insisted, rather surprised at my question.
“But it’s burnt down?”
“Yes.”
“Twice.”
“Many times.”
“And rebuilt.”
“Of course. It is an important and historic building.”
“With completely new materials.”
“But of course. It was burnt down.”
“So how can it be the same building?”
“It is always the same building.”

Last Chance to See
Douglas Adams

[49] emotion, vision, tempo, technicals

This is the path that flow seems to require.

This is second in line to the throne.

This is also the current primary prototype. Verbalizing carelessly will damage it.

[50] shape-details separate from color, emotion-pose-proportions separate from composition

The first half I’ve talked about. The second half I don’t know how to talk about. I know what it is but for the purpose of explaining to outsiders rather than as part of executing a piece thinking around it is difficult. I think it’s one of the current understandings on how to approach a certain composition problem? Composition really is different from object-oriented thinking. Maybe it’s trying to export the shape-detail derivation to composition. That seems sensible.

[52] understanding < ability < reach

It is commonly understood that whatever your understanding is, your ability is less than that, and what you can do at any particular moment is within your ability. This is exactly backwards. Your reach is always beyond your understanding. In physical space this is counterintuitive since your ears see beyond your eyes and your eyes see beyond your hands. This is not true in thought space or drawing space.

If you try it out, you will find this to be self-evident.

— — — — — —

EPILOGUE

Things that probably belong here but didn’t fit above, and comments on things others have said and asked.

— — —

Things that probably belong here but didn’t fit the above:

Measuring

Measuring is the reason the relevant start date is 2014_12. At the time I had decided I’d had enough of competitive online games, wanted to do “something” with my life that was better than an abstract number in some game no one’s going to care about in a few years, and looked around for things to do. One of those things was drawing, and the most important thing I found of drawing was the concept of measuring.

The concept of measuring is that everything is made of lines and all lines have a length, an angle, and some distance and angle in relation to some other point or line. The stereotypical artist pose of holding a pencil up vertically at arm’s length between the eye and the subject is measuring.

Measuring is the point at which I started seeing art as a knowable skill. I’d always been told art was about “expressing yourself” or “feelings” or a number of these other mushy words. What the heck are those? Anatomy, perspective, contrast, composition, these and others were better, but felt impossible. Perfect, unbroken walls. How am I going to get all of that right? Measuring though, measuring is just lines at certain angles. I can do that. Bad result? Well, all the lines were right when I made them. This line’s length should be this proportion to that line alright. And so is that one. Hm. What if the problem is I connected them using the wrong idea? What if they’re in the wrong order? I mean, I don’t think measuring them in a different order should change anything, and yet it does. So maybe the eyes should be in relation to nose, and the nose should come first? What if the hair is in relation to the face rather than the head? What if, what if?

Hey, this is actually pretty fun and interesting. Always something new to find out, and there’s usually something nice at the end.

“What if?”.

Tempo Dreaming / Doodling

I somehow happened across the idea and the below mentioned videos and they introduced me to the concept of “tempo”. The idea as I have it is that speed, timing, and order of things appearing in the drawing is important, down to the second. If you try doing the same thing at the speed of, not “don’t lift your pencil from the page”, but “don’t stop moving”, you will make something different. You are not a machine, you don’t have a fast-forward button, doing things faster in the most real sense literally changes things. My intuition says faster means worse because there’s less control. This is true and irrelevant. One, you can maintain the things you wanted to control to perfectly comfortable levels while being a lot faster than you think you’d be comfy at. Two, the ideal isn’t full control, the ideal is beauty, and beauty is not a pure subset of control. The guy with the watercolor sponge didn’t make beautiful trees by planning out the placement of every shadow. Yet the painting still exists, and he is still the one who made it. I have difficulty accepting this when I’m going about details, and yet that is undeniably the case.

This is the third component in the study list’s second-in-line.

I’ve never been able to “doodle”. I think this is related to doodling. I can doodle a bit now.

Something I’ve been doing recently is starting off the day with this “tempo” drawing. First thing in the morning, before water but after stretches, draw. A long time ago I noticed reading the news made me feel not comfy. At some point I noticed the entire day was nicer if I simply didn’t open the world at the start of the day. This is an extension of that. I do this kind of drawing at the start of the day. It’s not productive in the old sense: I’m not learning or practicing or improving anything I can identify. I’m not working on any pieces. But it makes me feel nice and comfy. It feels like peace. Usually something pulls me down from there, but it’s an elevated starting point. I regularly hit flow inside it, so it seems plausible that it will be more likely to hit it any time the rest of the day. I think a common way of phrasing this feeling is “Everything will be alright”. I have not found another way to buy this feeling, not at anywhere near this price. “Setting the tone for the day” is real.

I think “Tempo” is the right name for it. I call it also “Dreaming” because that’s what it feels like. I don’t think it’s right to call it a “Technique” or an “Exercise”. I don’t think of it as a muscle or a tool. I think of it as making myself more worthy to receive gifts from the gods.

The videos are:
Sinix Design, “Tempo: The Overlooked Key to Improving at Art
Proko, “Meditation for Artists – The Automatic Drawing Technique

— — —

Comments on things others have said and asked:

A long time ago I asked an artist of some import on a server of not so much import that we were both on if he could introduce me to any art servers or communities. He said he doesn’t hang around art groups. The server we shared was themed for FGO, a gacha mobile game. I now understand the wisdom in this.

I spend time around other artists, but I don’t spend any time in art groups or art communities. There are several reasons for this, a few of which have been mentioned above and will be mentioned below. The problem isn’t inherently “artists shouldn’t talk with each other” as it is a lot of things that have happened to be true about the current ruling party. Is there some large conspiracy where everyone is on the same payroll? It feels that way. They all say the same things, and it’s definitely dead fish most of the time. Definitely a general recommendation against groups themed as ‘getting better at art’. Avoid those places. Same for watching videos. The above two are rare exceptions.

As such, some of this may be outdated. It’s probably not as outdated as either of us think though.

“If you’re just starting out” / “This is for beginners”

No.

Stop saying these. Stop listening to these. These are bad. Stop these words from entering your mind. If you don’t have the power to stop reading a sentence after starting it, now is the time to get it. I don’t know the logic but the pattern behind every instance of these words when it comes to art is has been associated with narcissism (streamers, youtubers, other leaders) or cope (fishing for empathy). I don’t know what “infantilization” is but it sure looks like the right word here. You will not get better around these words, you will only get worse.

Why is it bad? It makes everything provisional. And we know why provisionalism is bad [14].

The inherent concept, of masters as eternal beginners, of endless learning, is good. What’s not good is the fetishization of symbols, which includes words. There is so, so much god damn fucking “advice” out there for “beginners” that is nonsense. Could we have something uh not for beginners? Like for journeymen or something? Or maybe just offer it as an idea within some context rather than some kind of objective skill level. Everything has to be for “beginners”, or their opposite (which reinforces the dichotomy), “professionals”. There’s so many idea that are so, so good but so many of them are prefaced with “I’m not a professional, I’m just self taught, so” Why? What is the purpose of uttering these words? Does a real professional, whatever that is, saying “I’m a professional and” make his opinion better? What about a master saying “I’m just a beginner”? Who and what gains from such words?

Hint: It’s not your next drawing.

And what are we trying to do when we’re looking for new ideas?

The funny part of this is everyone these kinds of people point to are of an obviously different type. The common recommendation for anatomy is Andrew Loomis’s “Figure Drawing For All It’s Worth”. What does Loomis say? Loomis says the most important thing is courage to face the unknown and the rest of his methods on anatomy aren’t actually that important. A slightly less common recommendation is on gesture, to watch Glenn Vilppu. Gesture is line of action, ‘every drawing should start with life’, the first and most important thing. What does Vilppu actually say? He says if you don’t have a basic grasp of anatomy and perspective, go do those first, otherwise you’re just going to confuse yourself and get frustrated. Vilppu’s line I don’t remember which video, but the search was “vilppu gesture” and I heard the line in under 2 hours. Loomis’s line is from the introduction to the book in question, you can read it for free, its PDF is currently the first result on Google for “Loomis Figure Drawing”. Am I just lucky? Am I the only one who’s actually paying attention? Hm.

The broader version of this is “This is just my opinion, but” and yes, I have this same problem with the culture at large too. Stop uptalking. Stop asking questions that aren’t questions. Stop saying “sure”, start saying “yes”. It’s just my opinion? Of course it’s my opinion, it came out of my mouth.

Why should you trust me?

The correct answer is: You don’t have to.
The real answer is: Why are you asking other people who you should trust?

Realism

I think realism is bad, but it occurs to me the more real reason why people use it.

I don’t think realism is king. I think beauty is king. This is something that realists will admit in detail but not broadly. They will admit that even if the 3D model or photo says something, if it looks “bad” (but not “unrealistic”) you should change it so that it’s better. The obvious example here are still frames of sports people while in motion. More broadly the concept of a “flattering angle”. Realists will treat hairs as locks rather than as a billion strands, will use hard edges where things are round, will use lines even though “lines don’t exist in real life”. In the end realism is a fake king that’s only around to usurp the throne.

I think the real reason why people use realism though is because it’s the only ideologos available to them. I spend my time around anime artists, and so many reasonings behind things are pointed to realism, even though clearly they don’t actually care about it. At the very least they don’t use it anywhere near as much as they talk about it. Clothing folds are understood by thinking of gravity? All 30~50 of these shadow shapes on this jacket were from simulating gravity in your head? Do I believe that answer? I think the better explanation is this is just what they say when they’re asked, and they say it because that’s what they know how to say, in a way that fits together with everything else. [Art in the drawing] is a language that’s not the same language as [Art in public discussion] as a language, and it so happens that in our time and place, most art is said to be good or bad whether or not it’s “realistic”. In other words it’s a religion. An ideology.

They probably understand just fine what they’re saying and don’t have these problems I’m talking about. In the end all implorements are relative to some implicit premise. I haven’t said you should “draw every day” as advice because I already draw every day and have forgotten it’s something some people need to hear. I think “draw what you like” is important because I get stuck on technicals. I think “copy more” is important because I keep getting amazing ideas when I do it. People who keep referring back to realism even though they do little around it probably do so because they benefit from such a thing.

The thing realism says it’s opposed to is “symbol drawing”. Symbol drawing is a stick figure, or circles/lemons for eyes, triangle for nose, things like that. Coincidentally I don’t see a problem with symbol drawing. I think improvement is just getting better symbols. Everyone knows that eyes should be equidistant from the nose, and the nose and mouth should be in the center of the face. Only difference from there to me is I consider a number of other things. It’s a fairly large number, one I can’t consciously keep track of, but it’s not a difference in type. A circle doesn’t become not-a-symbol simply because it’s now a ball.

And besides, lots of symbol drawings are charming. Would you prefer something charming or something realistic?

What is the extent of power of the fundamentals?

Fundamentals are anatomy, perspective, color theory, some list of things you could google. Every major artist and school talks about this, it’s the curriculum. I don’t think these are the real fundamentals. “Fundament” means “bottom”, as in your butt, where you sit, so “fundamentals” by etymology is “the place where all ideas sit”. I believe the fundamentals of art are intent, vision, emotion, the things I’ve talked about here. For clarity of discussion I’ll give the word to the other party.

I believe fundamentals are best understood as the set of things which have happened to be found as independent of any particular artist’s “style”. It is accurate to call this post indicative of my thinking “style”. If every artist wrote out all that, no one would read anything. Fundamentals are a common language first. Second, they are concepts to understand visual reality. Artists lighting is not the same as physics lighting, artists anatomy is not the same as medical anatomy, and so on. They aren’t about “understanding the world”, but they are about “understanding the world as it can appear on the canvas”, which is what artists are after.

Said again: the artist’s fundamentals are first a language to communicate with other artists, and second a set of starting points to understand the craft’s commonly available tools. It is the lingua franca and the textbook. It is a question of taste as to whether these are actually the 20 that carry the 80. I am pretty sure it is just for sales.

“No matter who you are and what you want to do in the future we will tell you the things that will become most important to you!”

Hm. Press X to Doubt.

My list and interests are more like a map to the spirit. I don’t think of myself as spiritual. I had problems I wanted to solve, problems I refused to accept or give up on, and this was the solution I came across. Is it the only solution? Maybe not. But once you’ve found something, that’ll be the last place you look. At least, until it breaks. It has broken some times. It has not broken more often or caused more serious problems etc. than the previous holder, which is the real question. It has also opened a lot of things everywhere I never conceived possible.

The question is always “compared to what”.

The primary conflict here is what constitutes a drawing. I believe fundamentals conceive of the essence of a drawing as a bunch of technical components. I do not believe this. I believe it is flow and telos.

What is the purpose of a reference?

The primary conflict here is what constitutes creativity, or originality.

I don’t think creativity exists. Not on the broadest scale people are thinking about. It could be I’m a dumdum with no original thoughts, but that is my working premise. Creativity in drawing is largely exploring things you don’t understand and happening to find something that works, and misremembering things you understood at some point – that is to say, creativity is like dreaming.

Creativity is often thought interchangeably with drawing from “Imagination”. The etymology of “imagine” is Latin “imaginari”, “to form a mental picture”, which in turn has the stem of “imitari”, “to copy, imitate”. Imitation precedes imagination, or is imagination. This matches my personal experience, as well as both praise and criticism of other artist’s creations. If it is good, it is usually “inspired by” or “an homage” to something else, usually a lot older, that was in essence the same thing. In other words, copied.

Copying is a skill. “Mindless copying” is… what’s the word. It’s propaganda, but that’s not the word. It’s something made by the Creativity party to prop itself up. If people can’t properly appreciate, i.e. can’t tell, how extremely difficult high-fidelity copying is, every effect is beneficial for those who currently have the power. Denigrating copying means denigrating learning. Denigrating learning means both that people think less of themselves and others if they attempt to do it, and that if they try doing it it turns out significantly more difficult than expected, which applied again means they can’t accept the situation as it is and thus give up and do something else. If someone is labelled as a copier, all of those feelings are then projected onto him: he must be a lazy loser with no ideas of his own. A good copy takes a lot of skill, and a lot of humility. Most people don’t copy not because it’s against their morals, but because it’s hard, and doing it would reveal both that they’ve been following a lie and that their skill is not where they thought it would be. If copying were easy, things would be made in Africa by now. They’re not. They’re still made in China.

I do not understand why people want to think of themselves as original or creators of things so I cannot comment too much in that direction. I have tried and failed to fathom its internal logic. Its external logic though is obvious and boring: it’s dickwaving. “I made this thing all by myself”. Oh did you now. What did you create? A new color? It never gets to this step, the direction of play is always “no u”, but if it were played out it would reveal the concept as nonsensical. Apparently it’s copying if you copy other peoples work but remake it, but it’s not copying if you go to school, copy a bunch of exercises on anatomy (read: other peoples’ heads, torsos) or perspective (read: other peoples’ boxes), and then set out a composition, at which point you copy the 3D environment off of Sketchup and copy the poses off of some 3D program or took a picture of your own or someone else’s hand. Hm. Hmm hmm hmm. Or you could just admit copying is good and save all that energy for something fun.

The reason people don’t admit copying is good is politics.

I’ve written this up before on bibliographies and see no reason to recreate it so I shall copy it.

I have a taste for bibliographies.

I think saying the purpose of bibliographies is “to prevent plagiarism” is absolutely insulting.

A trick that can only be played on children. No, that insults children, I should be more specific: people with no understanding of the world. It’s the same trick with intellectual property. “If someone has done it before you need to give them credit”. Question: How am I going to know that? How are you going to know that? I’m going to search the whole library to see if someone did it before me? What if the library’s incomplete? What if the Library of Congress is incomplete? And it is incomplete. Even the Library of Alexandria was incomplete. Even 10,000 pages of Google is incomplete, and you’re not going to look past the first 10. Everything is a mountain in the jungle, and the jungle is infinite. Trying to find out if something has been done before you, ever, anywhere, is trying to search the entire jungle. You can’t do it. You are being sent on an impossible task. To make it exceedingly clear: You are being fucked with.

Plagiarism is really about who’s going to come after you for not giving them credit. That is to say: it’s about “who”. It’s power. If you’re small and they’re big, they can take whatever they want and claim it’s theirs. They can even claim they did it first and you stole from them (search: art plagiarism). If you’re really small though, you can take whatever you want, because no one cares about you. No one even sees you. In academia, we see the end goal of this anti-plagiarism device meets perfect information: citations absolutely everywhere. Everyone knows everyone, and everyone is looking for a slice. Names and titles and dates everywhere, every sentence, clogging up the flow of the actual stuff. It’s ugly.

I’m a nobody so it doesn’t matter. I do what I want.

I largely can’t be bothered because citations eat up my time: any time and energy I spend looking into who said what is time I’m not spending doing and finding out new things. All thinking, plus or minus, cites all the way back to the Buddha or Socrates. Guess who the Buddha and Socrates cited? And we want to be like those two guys, right? Not the academics?

It doesn’t matter if someone else found it before me (especially not if I don’t know who did it), I didn’t do it so I don’t get it, and when I do it it’s new to me. The most common thing is people say things that are too vague, the less common but still frequent case is they say things that are obscure; anything that is useful to me I’ve basically had to do myself anyways. So either I spend energy figuring out what people are talking about, and then do it myself, or, I just do it myself. It’s usually not a very hard choice.

But I like bibliographies.

Bibliographies help me remember things.

Other than being spatially gifted/verbally impaired, I have a really terrible memory. The primary reason why I wrote all this and do any thinking is because I can’t remember jack squat. Normal people with good memories, I imagine, are just fine with a bunch of disparate pieces of information. That’s presumably why they enjoy that trivia stuff so much. But I can’t do that. I can hold only a few things. So I need to hold the best few things. As it turns out, there are different types of things, and this type is better than the rest, because it is a single thing yet also multiple things. It requires thinking to produce, and is usually called a “principle”.

“Ideology” is what I’ve called a principle of principles. It’s usually called “epistemology”, but I don’t like that word too much. I like the sound of the word “ideology”. And I can see what it is: idea, logic. Logic of ideas. What the heck is an “epistem”? But back to book-graphing.

Good ideas are not randomly distributed. Someone who’s had a good idea before is likely to have a good idea again; someone who’s had multiple good ideas before is more likely to have good ideas in the future. The world is really big and there’s a lot of ways to see about and think around it. You can only see and do so much yourself. It’s nice to have people who you can use to do additional thinking for you and run into real problems “beforehand”. There’s still the minimum reverse-engineering and implementation costs stated earlier, and it is pretty hard to find someone who’s not just being deliberately obscure (for dickwaving purposes) – but that’s why bibliographies are great! Once you’ve found one good thinker, if he has a bibliography, it significantly increases your chances of finding more good thinkers.

As for the creation side of it, naming sources helps me remember the lineage of ideas.

Lineages are something that turns the dots of ideas into lines: it’s another type of principle.

Some lineages are very important. You need to know who said it and what it was used with etc. to figure something out. Other lineages basically don’t matter and external factors could be rederived offhand. I think it’s rather good practice to keep at least a couple of notes on lineage of each thing around. It tells you where the minimum domains on the things are: “at least according to this guy”.

The general purpose of (copying) references is to give you a window into what is possible. It is external search. The specific purpose of (copying) references is that it does the parts you don’t care to look into.

As much I’ve talked on about telos and flow, a drawing is indeed also a bunch of parts. An assembly. When you are drawing, you are assembling parts. You are largely not actually making those parts “from scratch”. I am not relearning how to draw a face every time I draw a face on a woman (that is not on the page yet), I am following my memory on what the technology/component of “drawing a face” is, which at time of writing had its last major revision on 05_01. Every face since 05_01 has been “the same” face, even if the final drawing doesn’t look like the same face, usually because I forget to do some thing, am sloppy, am feeling a certain way, thought of things in one order when it only really works in another, or because like all ideas/techs they’re incomplete. This applies to everything. Hair tech has one of the newest updates as mentioned a few times, color is constantly updating, legs are really really old and I should poke around it again sometime. I dilike programmer philosophy but they work with “information technology” so naturally their stuff that works tends to be useful as structures for ideas.

References are for assembling parts you don’t care to look into. If I don’t care about interior or environment design but want an environment, I will pull up a picture of some place and copy what I see. This extends also to problems with existing parts, caused for whatever reason, that you don’t care to look into to fix. I have some vague idea of how hands work. For some simple idea and angles I can make them just fine, or at least fine to my standards. However I don’t like constraining the composition stage to “only have hands I can draw”, so often they give me hands I can’t draw from imagination: I can’t copy from memory because it takes too much effort to figure out the sizes and angles of fingers and things. So I look at my own hands. And if I can’t get what I need from looking at my own hands, I open up 3D. “Handy Art Reference Tool” for android is what I use. In the past and for some other things I use Honey Select, which is ostensibly a porn game, but is really a skinned easier to use Unity engine. What does the body look like when posed this way from this angle, hmm, if we want we can find out. Some people simply trace these hands and bodies too, I don’t, because I prefer the feeling of copying by eye to copying by hand; I’m willing to pay for the drop in accuracy/quality. I’m aware other people use 3D or references for perspective/sizing, or lighting of scenes. There’s probably other ways too, but this is the principle. “There is a problem here but I would like to work over there”: references help “here”.

The notion that one might have to name all used references in a public court of opinion is what pushes many away from using references, and is exactly the same feeling as having to write up a bibliography in school. I can’t think up of the- oh right I remember now. The term used is “credit”. “Give credit” to the “original artist”, or “original model”, or whatever. I have a problem with this, not because I don’t like the idea of giving credit to people who have helped me, but because without a proper understanding that everything is copied and there is nothing new under the sun, the concept of “credit” and “reference” runs into the ground, and here there is no ground, it’s turtles all the way down.

Courts of public opinion are courts of villains. Recently I saw someone ask how he should comment/post a drawing of his, saying it was some scene from some anime, except he changed the character or the color or something I don’t remember. The response was that he should credit the anime, probably post the screencap he was working of, because otherwise people might think he was claiming it as his own original creation. These people are plagued by some phantom mob that has developed in the past 10 years or so. I remember a time when anime wallpapers were plentiful and made by people who made vector art tracing over screencaps. Literally no one cared, literally no one thought some guy on the internet was claiming his wallpaper of Senjougahara from Bakemonogatari meant that he was stealing or claiming it was an official Senjougahara from Bakemonogatari wallpaper from studio SHAFT. Apparently though that’s not the standard these days? We’re all in Disney Nintendo Blizzard land now? I refuse. Not in my domain.

Every person was born and raised by some family, that family had some income from some employer or customer, who got it from someone else, and so on and so in, all within a system of linguistic, social, cultural, legal and other laws, back and back in an unbroken chain of civilization to before the dawn of time. No man is an island. No drawing is an island either. Every drawing you do builds upon the last drawing you did, and the first drawing you did was built upon your life up to that point. There are always more references.

Only credit the most direct references? Who determines what is the most direct reference?

The concept of “credit” as it is common today is a brain virus. If these people had their way with the world, the living would forever serve the economy of the dead, forever paying 99.8% royalties because some minute thing today was found to be related in some way by some faceless unpaid bureacrat to something minute thing by someone else who came long before. The butterfly effect means the butterfly should be crowned king. Nevermind the butterfly’s butterfly, or the dead’s dead. Just pay up your “fair share”.

Of course, these politics people don’t actually think all this. They just make threats to get their slice of the pie, make up whatever casus belli sounds hip at the time (“protecting copyright”), and leave the mess for other people, usually the next generation or three, to figure it out. Unfortunately, I happen to be on the side that figures things out.

Fortunately, I also happened to figure this one out.

If you copy, you get to stand on the shoulders of giants. Coincidentally, you’re gonna need some humility. Watch your step or you’ll fall off.

Copy more.

“Centralization leads to complexity, complexity leads to crisis, attempts to fix the crisis have, because of complexity, unintended consequences, which escalate into further crisis, leading to further centralization, Hence Soviet Russia, Hitler’s Germany, Venezuela, and now America.

This is the crisis of socialism, explained in “I pencil”, which makes the point that no one actually knows how to make a pencil, hence socialist production of pencils will fail.

In order to manage complexity, you need walls, so that one man can make decisions without having his decisions mucked up by another man’s decisions. Hence, private property and local authority, the authority of the father, the authority the business owner, the authority of the CEO. And, not so long ago, the authority of the local aristocrat, who tended to be a high officer in the local militia, a major employer and landowner, and related by blood or marriage to most of the other high officers in the local militia.

Ideally all the consequences of a decision should be contained within those walls. Of course they never are, but if you try to manage all the externalities, things very quickly slide of control. Every attempt to manage the externalities has unexpected consequences, and attempts to deal with the unexpected consequences have additional unexpected consequences, because trying to control matters that have externalities connects everything to everything else, resulting in a tangle beyond human comprehension.”

Throne, Altar, and Freehold
Jim’s Blog

“Hmm? It is a staple of theater, though I am not so fond of it. I prefer an ending where the many plots are resolved, yes.

But without a god’s intervention, human animosity and love cannot easily be erased. The playwright must have reached the end of his rope. Most writers know the tangled web of human emotions cannot be undone by humans themselves. So, the deus ex machina is an expression of hope.

A last hope, to be sure, a mirage created by those on the verge of ruin, wishing for a savior.”

Nero Claudius
Fate/Extra

— — —

References

A Mountain in the Jungle
Magnum opus. Hub world. The fastest way to travel between any of my ideas is through here. It’s also 30,000 words, the second 15,000 of which are quotes composed to tell about the same story as the first. Up until this post, the most I’d written while remaining semi-coherent.

All of the links in here are to other things I’ve written. If you want pointers from my writing to things other people have written, it’s probably in AMITJ.

Peace
Something I wrote offhand once that keeps coming back.
Perhaps the most direct predecessor here.

The Lineage of Thought
It feels relevant.

Japan’s Karaage and Anime Industrial Policy 
This is from commentary on the pictures I uploaded after my trip to Japan. After having written the main post, the pictures’ comments ended up being longer than the main post, primarily because of thoughts on industrial policy and intellectual property. I had the seeds of all the comments I made at the time and place the pictures were taken, the length is only by extension. Seeing really is believing.

The Education Mythos
Reactions to looking into the manufacture of smokeless powder.
Happened to remember this while writing. Have not remembered it for some time. In retrospect, this was one of the big disillusionments with “knowledge”. Education is claimed to be many things, only the least important of which is you “learn how to learn”. Education is none of them. Education is one of the great lies.

World of Tanks, Rigging, and Its Defenders 
The things people will say to defend the state.

[Notes] NieR: Automata
Automata is an example of perfect art.

— — —

“I am considering writing something on drawing philosophy/psychology/thingy. Technical- and piece-independent. If I wrote this, do you have anything you would like me to talk about?”

“the part of drawing that isn’t about drawing
that is
how it changes how you relate to the world / by virtue of doing it, practicing, seeing with “its” eyes, etc”

“Yes, that is the general direction of everything. Anything specific?
Like did you want something like a worked example/chain of how drawing has changed how I look at politics?”

“YES
YES
YES
that would be amazing”

How can I do this without writing another 15,000 words? Hm..

What would worldy politics people find interesting that I don’t find uninteresting… I guess that’s the answer. Politics and worldly things are uninteresting to me. Even writing this is uninteresting to me, because I already knew what was in the original [53] lines, writing out 15,000 words helps me a bit but “compared to what” compared to drawing it fucking sucks.

That’s the big principle. I started drawing because I wanted to have something to show for my time at the end of the day. There isn’t time for this, and that, and drawing, no what I have each day is time, and the gold standard is if I am not drawing this minute I better be able to explain why that is better than drawing this minute. I started writing this because it kept popping its head up while drawing and I decided to feed it, but it is clearly a bottomless pit, and between seeing a poor little verbalization demon starve to death and getting back to drawing nice things, I am going to starve the demon. Maybe after it’s dead I can get some nice meat but as a live thing it has eaten up way too much of my time. Next time I am just going to kill it.

The activity that was most of my time immediately before drawing (before 2014_12) was a competitive online game called World of Tanks. Immediately before WOT was school. WOT was preferable to school because even as 1 player in a rigged 15 vs 15 game (which means 1 vs 29), I had more power than I did in school. I was interested in politics at some point but it waned over time. It’s not something I can do anything about. Having more interesting ideas on politics means being able to talk to more interesting people… about politics, which is still something I can’t do anything about. Something that’s helped a lot push this way is finding interesting people who have absolutely nothing to say on politics. These people you are not going to find by talking about politics. You have to have something to offer them. No matter how fringe or anti-establishment or whatever the words are, if you are talking about politics, the primary thing you are offering is ability as a propagandist for the state. That you are a propagandist for a foreign state or a future/past/imaginary state is a minor not major attribute. Just so it’s obvious, the ideas in this post have to do with making pretty things. These are ideas I use, and ideas you could use. The ideas of politics are for the usage of lords. I’m not a lord. You are probably not a lord. If you aren’t, you’re thinking for someone else. I hope you’re getting paid. I wasn’t, and it wasn’t fun, and once I got something better I stopped.

School/politics to videogames to drawing to ever more of drawing and ever less of things not drawing (more broadly: things I can’t do) was step by step. The question is always “compared to what”. If you really lay two options out in front of you and continually pick the one that is less bad (on the axis being desired) every time, you will eventually get to something good. This is not a trivial task. You are picking between which god to serve. The scales will tip one way, and you will think, because after accounting for NAXALT or Equality or Hardship Builds Character or any number of things that aren’t actually the thing in front of you that you wanted to find the result of when you started, the scales “actually” tip the other way.  Some of these failures will be costly. They are harsher than Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy.

If you are interested in politics, you are interested in other peoples’ business. You have no idea how much better life can be the more you mind your own business. Don’t bother with time management “apps” etc, these will save you hours but not minutes, and minutes add up while hours don’t. If you want to do something, you will find a way to do it. You need to want to mind your own business, and the best way is to show yourself how beautiful things can be by minding your own business. It may take some time. Trees take time to grow. Your soil might be better or worse than mine. But there’s not ever gonna be a tree if you don’t plant it.

Teleology is real. What you really want is always being revealed. Anything you see someone doing is the tamest version of what actually goes on in their head, which in turn is usually a tame version of whatever goes on in their “unconscious”. Recently I read an anon say MTSP, artist/author of one of the quintessential NTR (cuckoldry) doujins, has not made anything good in the 6-7 years since that doujin. ‘Making it has clearly broken him’. I believe it. I believe other stories like this. People who make grotesque things are/will become grotesque people, or will be broken because that is not who they are. There are no unrelated “random” “quirks”. Everything is connected to everything else.

This implies snap judgments are also real. There are ways to snap harder, faster, broader, and be even more right. By obverse, anything to do with evidence or peer review or analysis or reputation is too slow and thus fake. Inherently fake? Maybe not. But the slower it is the more time nonsense has to take over, and any time I spend filtering out nonsense is time I’m not spending actually making sense of things. I thought about filling this post in casually over time, but after I noticed it was a demon I decided to finish it as soon as possible.

This also means interest in divination and the occult. The point of knowing things is to reach a decision before the things occur. As said above there are limits to how much useful stuff you can actually know before it actually occurs, but the scope that divination can reach is also greater than expected. This is because what is allowed to be known is controlled by the state. Accurate geographical maps were once state secrets; it follows obviously that accurate spiritual maps would also be state secrets.

“But occult is kooky” It matters not if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. Who’s testing hypotheses and who’s not? Astrology as compared to what? Astrology talks about personalities, so as compared to MBTI. Does astrology read better than MBTI? Grant Lewi does. Is astrology mostly crap, sure, but why should I excuse science’s failures while not excusing astrology’s? Because the state is the patron of science. Everyone’s seen the ridiculous kinds of research that gets big government grants, the only difference is those are “funny” and “accidents” while teleology is recognized only when it’s time to point it at the enemy. How do the planets’ positions affect personality? The cat is black. Fundamentally occult and the bureaucracy are similar. Thus it is not so surprising some warnings against learning magic are because they will attract intelligence spooks. But there are other spooks too. Like the one that got to MTSP when he was making that NTR doujin. Or the one that’s on me right now writing this stuff out.

I call them gods and demons because object oriented thinking has uses. There’s not some fantasy-horror looking creature that I’m hallucinating on my shoulder. These are terms borrowed that originate from the religious and occult, just like “technology” or “updates” or other things are borrowed from scifi and programming. When ancient mathematicians or whoever said their idea came to them via an “angel”, I believe it was an illustrative way of saying “it occurred to me” or “I noticed”. These days you’re allowed to say you saw it in a dream, or noticed something when watching TV, or in a class, or etc. etc. The way simply no longer exists for spiritual visualizations. But to me it matters not if the cat is black or white.

No, that’s not entirely accurate. It does matter. I call them gods and demons they invoke certain things for me, and the associated visual imagery while not important does fit. I would refuse to use some neutered cuckold bureaucrat’s wording scheme, especially if they’re just a “reboot” of the real deal. This is why I don’t like programmer philosophy, everything they say feels this way. Every time I hear about “Roko’s Basilisk” I throw up a little. They should call it Roko’s Infinite Recursion or some programming thing and not go fucking around aesthetics that don’t belong to them / they don’t properly respect.

Finally, I’ve taken dreams vaguely more seriously. Drawing at its best, in flow, feels like a dream. I’ve always liked dreams and the stories they tell me. I don’t care if it’s random neurons firing or whatever, there are better and worse dreams, not in the sense that they are good or bad stories, but in the sense that there are books in good and bad condition; the librarian doesn’t really care what’s in the books, I don’t really care about what’s in the dreams. The biggest known problem for dreams is when I play puzzle or “real time tactics” or strategy games, the dreams are just playing imaginary scenarios of those games. I do not like this. It’s way too rigid. So I try these days to not play such games as much. The other thing is I think less of people who make an effort to lucid dream. Every night you are being shown a new story, and you want to step all over it? What’s wrong with you? I’d tried it before but I did not like it for this reason; yes I now have telekenesis, but the cost is the dream is now pointless. This judgment now extends to others. People who don’t know their place are not to be trusted.

“I’m curious when you are creating to have the image and idea for it mapped out beforehand, what you want it to be, does it sort of come to you and come together as you’re doing it, is it both, and I guess what inspires you?”

I don’t create anything.

I have no ideas. I copy, and do what makes sense at the time. Sometimes I lose sight of the essence I’m trying to copy, and copy only the forms. If the essence is not there at the end, I feel terrible; if it is there at the end, I feel I did my part. So far my stuff is mostly a copy of an existing picture, if not the picture then really close to the concept of the existing picture.

I think it’s interesting other people can make fanart of fantasy characters in casual modern clothing doing mundane things, or posing in bikinis, but I feel unwell when I do these. The essence of a picture to me is something like an emotion, a character, and an enviroment or situation. If my understanding is missing these, then it is worse. I imagine it’s possible to internalize this more, to imagine all that other stuff while only drawing a character, and then put them in a bikini, and be fine with it. But at the moment I can’t do it. It just feels so much better if I have a story, rather than drawing body parts with clothes in A-poses. To be more than just a technician I need essence. At least so far, the only essence I can carry to the end of a drawing is one I’ve copied. I have some of “my own” ideas, for whatever that means when there is nothing new under the sun, but they don’t survive the drawing yet. They don’t survive the other parts of me.

It is not possible to map everything out beforehand. There are things you can’t see until the immediately preceding step. Drawings for me are largely a lot of little steps like these, though I’m getting a better idea of what steps are going to appear it’s always more like a go game to humans and less like a math equation to computers.

As said most of my stuff is copies of existing pictures, but within and outside of these most of the steps are still the same, when “it comes to me” are still usually at the same stages. The stages I can think of are composition, shape-details, and highlights.

Composition is at the start, figuring out the major shapes/lighting and how much space / where they should be in relation to everything else. Copying means only that there’s an initial thing available to check. Generally, especially if it was done by a big name artist or is part of a big name story, there’s good reasons for what they did, and copying means I get to find out what those reasons are. Not copying… well, you’re always copying something, can’t cook without ingredients, can’t build without materials. But “not copying” means you are to find a combination of shapes with a less than existing known-to-be-correct guidance. Painting copying from a painting is the easiest. Painting copying from a movie or videogame is slightly more difficult: what the original did in motion and multiple frames, you have to figure out what the conversion is for that emotion/scene and capture in one. I shouldn’t say figure. This stuff isn’t found by thinking. You have to find the path.

Shape-details again are the shapes of shadows on things. Loose kimono arms or tight pants on legs both have possible attractive shadow shapes that aren’t going to be found by simulating gravity wrapping fabric around cylinders. When I am doing comps or shape-details it’s very different from drawing the face, or checking/fixing body part shapes/sizes, or anything else. In everything else the overarching feeling is I’m filling out a form, or a test. These three though it feels like play. Like what a non-artist imagines an artist’s imagination looks like. I would like all of drawing’s steps to be this way. I have a doubt it is actually true that “you have to put in the hours” of suffering to get e.g. an accurately pretty body, and then you can do whatever you want with it. There are things that simply happen. But maybe pretty bodies are just not one of those things for me. Different things do have different prices. Hopefully if there is a deal someday, I will be ready for it.

Highlights bring things to life. Shadow-details do too, but highlights are special. For the other two I usually don’t know where I’m going to put them before I do them, for highlights I know exactly where I’m going to put them, but still it is different before and after they’re there. In anime a common way of making a character depressed is to take the lights and highlights out of the eyes. I’d always thought this was a crude and simple way of doing things, like there should be a more refined and tasteful method. And perhaps there is, but lights and highlights are real. One should expect bright lights and saturated colors to have the effects they do as much as one should expect 1 + 1 to equal 2. I see things after I put in the highlights. Some highlights I keep on separate layers so I can toggle them on and off from time to time to see if I’ll notice anything else.

I would like to portray “the light of god”.

I’m not religious, but this is the obvious name for what I see. A2, Kaori, and maybe Haruka are examples of successes. Yuki and Kazusa are examples of failures. Coincidentally these all have strong directional lighting, but this is probably to be expected. It is definitely a “light”; I had no care at all for drawing this when I was working with only lines. I’ve always liked certain sorts of dramatic scenes in stories. In the past I had thought I liked “beautiful death sequences”. That’s certainly where the “light of god” appears commonly, but after copying some and inspecting a lot, I don’t think that’s the most common theme anymore. It has something to do with light.

I would like to do this all the time but it is exhausting just thinking about it. These feel like building a monument. Which I like, but I need some kind of counterweight. I know my limits, I can’t do it all the time. I need some teleological equivalent of a restful slumber.

I don’t know what that is yet.

But I have a few ideas.

DS 45 kaorithis exists solely because facebook seems to default to the final image of a post for its preview image. apparently you can control it by setting a html meta property, but that's not allowed in free wordpress. what is allowed though is putting down images in html and then setting them to not show up. so this technically is the last image - as far as facebook is concerned.

[Notes] NieR: Automata

8/8
Canon: Tier 1

a2 window ending e

First played to completion 2017_03_18~20.
Replayed to completion 2020_03_08~27.
Third game to be replayed twice, second game to be replayed for story/tone/emotion, first game where replaying it I saw something different, yet all of it was still the same.

This will probably be the first game I play to completion a third time.



> What is the purpose of this record?
> What is the purpose of a game?
> What is NieR:Automata?
> Why do I remember it well?

> — It’s beautiful.
> — No One Stops.
> — Framing
> — — Camera
> — — Music
> — All its stories are fundamentally about the same thing.
> — It’s simple.


— — — (album of images used in this post) — — —


What is the purpose of this record?

I write this as a way to remember the most important parts of NieR:Automata (“Automata”). I would like to re-experience this feeling again and again, but without having to play through the whole game each time. That I’d like to do again too, but in another 2~3 years. Something in this form, of a videogame of 30~40h and certain narrative structures etc., isn’t something that can be re-experienced more frequently than that.

This is not a review. The more I’ve done reviews the more pointless they seem.

I tried out a standard-form review before, but it was obviously more filling out a form than writing a review. It was obviously wrong. I’ve thought about what a review really is before, and at the time I came up with some rules, but the main point is to tell people whether or not it’s worth their time. But how many words do you really need for that? How long can you stretch “You don’t/need to see this for yourself”? Not much. And if you have seen it for yourself already, and you’re talking to other people who have done the same, what kind of person would you have to be to rate visuals, audials, story, mechanics, and other things separately? Why would you do that? Why would you want to do that? I looked into the deep end of that once, and there are ways to do it right, but it’s exorbitantly expensive. Thousands of words can be written analyzing one minute. Who wants to read that? I for one don’t want to write that again.

I have opinions on a number of things, but generally speaking I only really care about 1) story and 2) aesthetics. Here I am most developed and most interested. Making the active attempt to comment on every little thing is misguided. Paying attention to every little thing is not, but that’s also not the same thing. I was originally going to review Automata in 2017; soon after playing it I went back and started playing it again, taking caps and notes on everything that could be noted. I didn’t make a review then because I stopped replaying it. Capping and noting slowed the playing to a crawl. It made the game unfun. If I’m suffering making an homage to something that was wonderful, how well can I really hope to convey the point across?

I should note here because this is where it’s been historically: Automata on PC runs very poorly unless you have the free “Fix Automata Resolution” mod by Kaldaien. You should get that if you’re playing it on PC. This is 3-year old info, so perhaps you don’t need it anymore, but I remember hearing complaints that Square Enix “still” hasn’t patched it vaguely recently. For reference, I played 2017 on 900p medium, and 2020 on 1080p high. I played with a DS3 controller the first time and a DS4 controller this time; don’t use KBM.


What is the purpose of a game?

game creator having fun

“If it’s not fun, why bother?”

– Reggie Fils-Aime, Nintendo of America

Why do people play games? People do the same things for different reasons.

Automata perfectly fits my purpose. Why do I play games? I play games because I want a story. What is a story? That’s where the questions stop getting bigger; for me, Automata is the answer. Automata is not the “best” story, but it is the best “story”; the entry for “story” in the lexicon has Automata as the title example. It has the most well-executed fundamentals of a story I’ve ever seen.

The most common complaint I saw three years ago was that combat in this game is “shallow”. It’s “button-mashing”, “brainless”, “not a real Platinum game”. These are all true. The combat is not difficult. There’s even an easy mode where you can turn on auto-attack and auto-evade, making combat an automatic affair. The combat is simple, the puzzles are simple, there is little thinking about material gathering or inventory management, money is largely plentiful, leveling is not an issue. If you are into videogames for the reason of dexterous controller usage, you will not like this game. If you are into videogames for competition against peers, you will not like this game. This game is not for you.

Note that Automata’s DLCs contradict this purpose. I do not like them. They come with costume changes, which I feel I shouldn’t use, and three combat arenas, one of which requires fairly precise maneuvers. I do like that they come with material shops; there’s a fair abundance of money in this game without doing much (I feel they reduced fishing speed though), but materials aren’t, and these make upgrading some weapons easier, which is great because in Automata weapons have stories. I don’t regret getting the DLC because I like Automata, but I’m never going to play through them, for the same reason I’m never going to bother with the sidequest Reconnaissance Squad, or getting all 26 endings.


What is NieR:Automata?

A collection of short stories on the nature of a raison detre.



Why do I remember it so well?

It’s beautiful.

6O i love it all

The girls are beautiful.
The music is beautiful.
The environment is beautiful.
The movement is beautiful.
The lighting is beautiful.
The story is beautiful.
It’s beautiful.
Nothing can replace beauty.

Style is not substance. This is true.

Style is greater than substance.


No One Stops.

A2 devpop tower

Everything is taken seriously. Honestly. Sincerely. Earnestly.

I happen to already have a nearly complete written version of this idea by someone else in much fewer words so I won’t rewrite the entire idea. It’s about Ace Combat but 90% of it applies to Automata, and the opposites are the same as well. This was in a thread asking why a certain game is so bad, ‘even ace combat is better than this’, ‘actually why do people like ace combat’, this was the answer. It was also the post which got me from “What is this Ace Combat” to “I have now pre-ordered Ace Combat”.

ace combat doctrine

“Ace Combat’s stories have always had an extreme, almost noxious degree of sincerity. Characters can be extremely passionate about something or other, and the story will present that sort of passion as righteous and meaningful. They’re stories that believe in noble causes, and that most people deep down are just decent folk. They’re stories where children sing just because they’re happy. In short, they’re stories that believe very firmly in the story that they tell.

It’s not exactly an elegant approach, but it stands out because of one of the habit of many writers and directors to approach every subject with as much detachment as possible. Heroes treat threats flippantly because detachment makes them seem above them and thus cool. Characters don’t get invested in higher causes, and will wryly comment on existing tropes in the manner of “So this is the part where I’m supposed to do X, eh? Well I’m Y, and so I’m gonna do Z.” Isolated characters like this have been in media since forever, but recently a lot of popular media has become dominated by writers who are afraid to make any of their characters invested, or even make the tone of the story treat the plot with significance. Probably the worst, most relevant example is Mass Effect Andromeda. Nobody- not the heroes, not the villains, not the side characters, not the camera or the events of the plot- seemed interested in playing up the significance of anything that was happening. The game’s script felt like they spent a week writing the plot and six months writing character quirks. Anthem seems like only a slight backtrack in that regard.

By comparison, even the most absurd sort of sincerity can be engaging. Ace Combat gives all sorts of a shit about itself, and that’s at least a start.”

The other 10% is simply that Ace Combat is generally about pushing “high” and “fast” while Automata is about pushing “deep” and “impermanence”.

This tone, this principle, is somewhat difficult to see in the english translation. This is not particularly a function of the English language (though Automata probably does read a lot more smoothly in Japanese). We know this, one, because it shows through here and there.

A2 apology 1
A2 apology 2

Contrast this to the usual, which I have one example because it stuck out really bad, but it’s pervasive. I’m used to this terrible tone revisionism to some degree; I can understand basic anime conversation Japanese and ignore the text when I already understand what’s being said, but here it was really aggravating. 2B and 9S are talking about the machines down in the canyon looking for heaven and god. 9S says something like, ‘What are machines doing talking about such things? Are God and Heaven even real?’ 2B, ‘They’ll find out after they die [pause] …and so will we’. 9S in Japanese says “mm”. Like, not “Yes”, not “Yeah”, but “mm”. That’s another gripe too, in the same direction, okay whatever, what did he say in English?

“Okay, THAT’s grim.”

Whoever translated that should be caned in public. The editor who approved it too.

That’s one.

Two is because we know that translations can exceed the original. The best example I have is even from Nier – the original. NieR:Replicant for Japan to Nier:Gestalt for everyone else (“Nier”) made some changes, the obvious one being they changed the main character from from a brother anchored to his sister, to a father anchored to his daughter. But there were other ones too, and one at the climax. To its credit, I don’t think Automata changed any major lines at climaxes. Nier did though. And it wasn’t a blunder. It made Nier one of the most memorable lines anywhere, from anything, bar absolutely none.

Japanese:

“Popola, let’s stop this now.”
“Stop? “Stop”? You want to stop? You think there’s the freedom to stop? You killed Devola, and now you dare say such a line?”
“Please, stop! It doesn’t-”

“It’s too late!
It’s all too late!
I will kill you all!”

English:

“Popola, let’s stop this now.”
“You want me to stop? You think I have the luxury to stop? You cut down my sister like an animal and you tell me to stop?”
“Popola, wait, it doesn’t have to-”
no one stops

“No one STOPS!
It’s way too late to STOP!
NO ONE STOOOOOPS!!”

This is how Automata should be all the time. And is, in Japanese. It’s consistent, flowing, all the time, sometimes it’s calm, sometimes it’s rough and fast, but it’s always there, like a calm stream or a torrential falls and it’s always water. English has water, sometimes. It is calm, sometimes. Torrential, sometimes. Then other times it has piss, beer that smells like piss, and corn syrup claiming it’s fit for human consumption. It doesn’t have to be this way. It can be done in English. It just isn’t. Ace Combat does it. I’ve never played Ace Combat in Japanese.


Framing

whether or not you enjoy something simply depends on your own heart

Proper framing makes the world seem larger than it is. Making the world seem larger invokes imagination, and imagination means the original idea grows and lives on after its presentation ends.

Automata is a masterpiece of framing.

There’s a standard idea of what a modern videogame should be. The controls should control one character, the camera should tied to the character and where they’re looking, the world should have this and that kind of interaction, be this kind of size and shape, and a laundry list of other things. All of this is an impoverished conception. A poor way of framing the world.

— — Camera — —

forest king

Automata most notably changes framing by changing its camera. Ostensibly it’s a character action game, which means third person free camera in 3D space, but that’s not what it is. You don’t start off that way. You start off in a flight unit, being able to shoot up. No that’s wrong, you start off in a flight unit, *not* being able to shoot at all because you haven’t been authorized weapons free. Initial combat is “shoot-em-up”. Then it becomes a “twin-stick shooter”. Then the camera moves behind your flight unit, so you’re looking forward. Then it’s a side shooter. Then twin-stick again, and somewhere during twin-stick the map scrolling has changed from down-scrolling-up to up-scrolling-down, then back to forward, before finally giving you the “real” 3d 3rd person melee combat character action game. Fight a few minor enemies to get you into the hang of the controls, then instantly a boss fight. Neat. Then run for a little bit, fight some more enemies, and, oh it’s not 3d anymore. It’s a sidescroller now. By total hours of gameplay Automata is majority 3d 3rd person, yes. But I’d bet if someone counted up just by when the camera changes, 3rd person free camera instances amount to somewhere between 1/2 and 2/3. It is almost constantly shifting. If those who like “character action games” dislike Automata, fine – it’s an “environment action game”.

There is nothing wrong with this other than that I’m framing it in a socially nonstandard way. Some of these things, or at least their types, are established practices, even expected, out of good games. Those who dislike such things say it’s “taking control away from the player”. This is true. But the implication is it’s also bad, which is the thing in question. Is it so bad that the player can’t control the camera at all times? In many character action games it is expected that the game takes control away from the player during combat: it is expected that the game will assist in landing a hit, both in direction and range. A slight miss should count as a hit. Being slightly too far should mean the character automatically leaps or runs or strikes that additional distance. Enemies attacking should be onscreen, or if they’re offscreen have an audial cue instead. “Player control” and “Realism” are false gods. Would enemies in real life announce themselves? Should character action games be like those “physics based” games where cooking isn’t about selecting the dish to make and having the right ingredients in the right amounts, but rather, balancing the onion properly so it doesn’t roll off when you attempt to cut it, and then having a bunch of odd sharp chunks because you don’t have the controls to even imagine making vertical slices? Which one is better? That is the real question. I remember watching a video analysis/review of Automata, and at the climax of the first ending rather than talking about what was going on in the game or the story or thematics this guy was complaining about how cutscenes are bad because they take away player control, I should be the one doing this and that, let me look around at other things rather than be forced to look at the important and dramatic scene, let me press the button to do the thing so it feels real to me. Such people are lost. They do not know what they are talking about. Automata doesn’t think they do either. There are many times where things aren’t on rails, where you are allowed to not do the thing they tell you to do, to not continue the story and drama. If you do this, the game ends. You get a bad ending. Automata has 26 endings. 5 are story. 21 are for shepherding these lost souls.

The forced-camera is used to make Automata’s maps bigger. The memorable example here is Pascal’s Village; coming from the Amusement Park it’s a sidescroller moving left, then up a forward-scroll for a short bridge, back to a side-scroll moving right, all without the camera changing orientation in 3D space. Leaving the village, while on the bridge the camera shifts, to 3d free camera behind your character – a 180. The path straight forward is not back to the Amusement Park, but somewhere else entirely. The first time I played this I was confused and turned back; “I thought I was going backwards, what happened to the Amusement Park?”. That path was still there. It was just to the left now. The extensive sidescrolling sections had no meaningful depth motion so when the camera reverted to 3D I forgot it was a thing. Ladder to Forest King’s grave is also like this. There are also other ways it executes this goal, principle again being put things where people wouldn’t consider looking. Memorable examples here are the two desert YoRHa androids and two of the three entrances to the desert’s undreground: the former places somewhere you wouldn’t really consider looking up, the other, looking down. These I feel are proper ways to make things bigger. For a time, titles bragged about how large their maps were, how free the player was to do anything, in any order, go anywhere, ‘See that mountain? You can climb it’. These were not untrue, but they were also pointless, lit., without a point. Having a place for the player to go that is far away is not a virtue. Why would we want to go there? No reason. What is there to do on the way there? Nothing. If I can get there quickly and without much effort, like being able to fly at will, is it even interesting to go there? This is why “open-world” games have died. This is why they felt cheap. Finding things that were hidden, but no sort of not really, they were only hidden because you were looking at something else that was also new and wonderful, is a way to make things bigger. Bigness that matters is not measured in feet, or meters, or pixels.  Bigness is measured in wonder.

Forced cameras, or at least, cameras not involving focus on the player character, I think is significant. A camera that follows the player around and responds to the player paints a world where the player has power. What the player is doing is always what is the focus on-screen, what the player wants to see, is shown, when he wants it. Forced cameras depend on where they’re moved to, but in the context of making worlds bigger there are some obvious choices, and Automata made a number of them, two common ones being shrinking character size / pulling the camera back, and fixing the camera on the world so the character moves in the world, rather than the world moving around the character.

— — Music — —

fishing

I feel Automata’s music usage is unique. I say this mostly as a preface; I don’t generally pay specific attention to music, it’s not obviously unique to me in the same way it uses its camera. It might be unique, I don’t know. I do know what I like about it.

The music here is a sense of place.

The most common occurrence is its scaling up and down depending on the action happening on-screen. If you’re idling or walking around, the music is calm. If an enemy detects you, the music ramps up, once combat begins and until it ends, a stronger, vocal version plays, and once it ends, it goes back to calm ambience once more. The “same song” is playing the whole time (I don’t know music terms). It doesn’t use a different song, it’s just the same song with more or less “layers”. Generally the song only changes if you move across regions. This keeps the feeling of the place consistent – or at least, that “place” is independent of “whether combat is occurring”.

Outside of cutscenes and sequences, the music is changed out on emotion.

On the larger side, music is scaled by the plot. In City Ruins, for most of the game you can bring out vocals and percussion via combat, but you can’t in the very beginning. Fighting to get supplies for the Resistance Camp does not trigger vocals. Vocals/Dynamic starts for the first time, without combat, when you head out to the Desert for the first time. Desert theme is simillar: you don’t get vocals until you get to the Apartment Complexes.

On the persistent side, going into the menu reliably lowers the volume and dulls the feel. There might be a pattern to what gets softened out but I’m not sure which. Similarly, hacking mode generally turns the music to 8-bit. There are some which don’t, a couple I felt were budget issues i.e. there should have been an 8-bit version, a couple others I felt it would’ve been bad if there was an 8-bit version for the reason of avoiding the combat-specific music effect: the “place” being depicted at that time was less about the hacking and more about something else.

On the smaller side, some quests will change music at their completion. These come with some major revelation to the player/character about the person they just helped. At that time the “place” is not City Ruins, or Desert, or Amusement Park, it’s that emotion.

Emotion is a place.

These repetitions (“motifs”?) help tie things together, make them larger, and make them stronger. I haven’t checked (it is not the point to check) but I’m pretty sure there were no new song appearances after ending B. Maybe the Tower interior, but that’s it. Everything else felt familiar, like I’d heard it somewhere before – and it’d turn out I did. There’s also variations on the same song, I didn’t notice [3.02] “War and War” is the same tune as [1.02] “City Ruins / Rays of Light” on the first time through; this is great and well-used too but I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about using the same incarnation of the song, except maybe removing vocals. All songs used at moments of great importance are literally put right in your face except for the cherry on top, all long beforehand. They’re done across what feels like all quests they appear in, I won’t go into all the connections.

I’m going to point out three big ones because they demonstrate the principle.

1.

I liked 6O. She was nice. She was cute. I remember liking her more long after stopping interacting with her though, hmm that’s odd, you wouldn’t expect that right? 6O is primarily with 2B, but I liked her a lot more when playing as 9S. Why is that? It doesn’t feel like it’s just “you don’t appreciate what you have until you miss it”, because that’s everywhere in Automata, what’s special about 6O? 2017 couldn’t figure it out. 2020 noticed there was a really, really good song playing at the end of her quest “Find a Present”. Properly framed, this quest is the ending to her character arc, which is probably why I remembered it this as “The 6O song”. 6O’s cheerful and her largest concerns up at the Bunker are relationship problems. Outside of that she likes nice cute things, but there is no “outside” because she’s not allowed outside of the Bunker. The quest is finding a rare flower to send a picture of to her. The flower is the Desert Rose. The Desert has next to nothing in it but dunes. After you send it, she’s jumping with joy. This song, with vocals, plays while she is thanking you, saying she can only imagine how wonderful Earth must be.

The song played for the Desert Rose is [1.14] “Vague Hope / Cold Rain”.
This song is played when 2B kills 9S in endings A and B.

2.

This one I looked for after seeing the above in ending A in 2020. 6O dies offscreen. 21O dies onscreen. Why don’t I remember her song? What is her final song? What’s playing while I’m fighting her? I remember screwing up and being overlevelled for most of C/D and just hacking everything, so I probably missed out on a lot of dialogue. This time I didn’t make those mistakes. And it still wasn’t obvious what song was playing. But it fit anyways. Why did it fit? That’s odd. That’s not what you would expect.

21O is concise, reserved. Work work work. 2B’s “emotions are prohibited”, except 2B clearly doesn’t follow this by the end of the prologue. The facade shows cracks here and there now and again, until the end of her quest, which involves gathering old trivial things from the Apartment Complexes. She talks an unusual amount here, ending with another thing she doesn’t do: A speculation. A wish. (“Vague Hope / Cold Rain” plays here too.)

“If androids had a similar system of families…”

Her final lines are also a wish.

“A family to be with…
I just wanted a family…
I was… so lonely…
I wanted to be… with 9S…”

A2 kills 21O. Immediately afterwards is a fight with the formerly nonfunctional “big brother” robot, now a boss with unique powers and a lot of little brothers. One of these is same robot that opened route B, with 9S saying, and this is my translation edit because while “big brother” is what the machine says, it’s not what 9S says,

“It doesn’t matter how much oil you give him, little guy.
Machines having families is something that cannot be.”

The song played in the final fight with 21O is [2.09] “Wretched Weaponry: Medium/Dynamic”.
This song is the area theme for the Abandoned Factory.

3.

When I first finished Automata one of the things that struck me was how little attention the best girl got. It was all 2B 2B 2B but I was sitting in my own little corner (the correct corner), and thinking, A2 is better than 2B for sure, but the real best girl is Devola. Why do I like Devola so much? She has sex hair. She’s clearly up-front and straightforward. She has a deathwish for guilt and loyalty. But these are all A2 too. What makes Devola better?

Well, it’s obvious. A2 has “Weight of the World”. Which is fine, but not great (by Automata standards, which admittedly is off the charts across the board, but contrast is more real than absolutes), especially because The Greatest Song Composed By Man goes with Devola and Popola. It was the first song I looked for after completing 2017 the first time. It’s a great song. But beyond the song itself, why do I like this song so much? Why does it feel so familiar?

Then going back for the abandoned second 2017 it almost immediately smacked me in the face. It came up a handful of other times too, but those weren’t the most important things.

Devola and Popola’s final song is [3.07] “Song of the Ancients / Atonement”.
This song is the second song in the game in order of appearance. It appears in the prologue, right after you get warmed up with the 3d/3rd person layout, when the first boss appears.


All its stories are fundamentally about the same thing.

commander it's up to you to decide

It’s said 2B is not the main character of Automata, it’s 9S. I’m not sure this is a generally accurate statement. 9S has connections to the greatest number of threads in Automata, so in that sense he’s the main character, but he’s not the main character in any other sense.

The entire cast of Automata is a supporting cast. Including you.

All stories in Automata are fundamentally about the same thing. The primary tone/question for everything is fundamentally the same thing.

What does 2B want? What does 9S want?

What does A2 want?

What do 6O and 21O want?
What do Devola and Popola want?
What does Pascal want? What do Anemone, and pick any or all Resistance members want? What do any of the machines you meet want? What do all of the questions posed by Automata pass through at some point? And usually, that point is revealed at the end. Large and small through rise and fall is the same thing, everywhere. Where it isn’t – gameplay complexity, grinding materials and achievements – it is minimized in deference to this question:

“What does it mean to be?” / “What do you want to be?”

It’s not “if you’ve seen one you’ve seen them all”.
It’s, you see yet another, and yet again it turns out, “oh, so this is an answer, too”.

There is simply no character, story, or place which is an exception.

There is no open world. There are no non-themed repeatable fetch quests. There’s no variety of cars to steal, no variety of women to bang, no various hair salons and(!) clothing stores and(!) jewelry stores for customization, no variety of activities where you can, quote, “do whatever you want”. There are, admittedly, items to collect, and completionist trophies. But you don’t get anything for having saved up more collectables, the game will literally give you a place to go if you don’t have enough for a quest when you pick it up. As for completionism, Automata, and this is the first game I’ve heard of that has done such a thing, lets you buy trophies from a “secret” trophy shop which they tell you about where and who to ask, from a person located in the place you revisit the most in the game. There is no trick here. These trophies show up on your PSN/Steam achievments.

All this is extended from the “lack” of “world building”. There’s not so much “world building” as there is theme building. Things aren’t built except as foundations for a theme. Everything stated serves a purpose. Or perhaps, because there’s only one, ‘everything serves the purpose’.

Why are there zombie machines, machines can’t eat each other, they have no mouth? Because the point is the emotions relating to cannibalism, not the biology. It’s one rendition of the collapse of social structure, and surprise, other more and less standard renditions of that idea are also present. Why is hacking a twin-stick shooter and not lines of code? Well, what would be a simple representation of the insides of a “computer” that would also be combat and thus suitable for a videogame? A twin-stick would be one of the first things that come to mind. Why are the weapons floating on their backs? Loading screen says MP which usually means Mana Points. There’s talk about magic technology in weapon stories and the archives. Is it important to the story how they achieve antigravity? Then why talk about it?

Why are they androids and not people? Same reason why the respawn points are vending machines and not factory lines, or hospitals, or what happens inside hospitals. Tech-named and tech-shaped things are what we can relate to today, not astrology or reincarnation, these are the same thing, just reillustrated and reworded so it can get across today.

mumbo jumbo philosophy

This is serious. I don’t think I’m reading too deeply on this.

When all named major NPCs are some philosopher or another, the main characters are named after philosophical sayings – 2B is “To Be”, 9S is “Non Esse” i.e. “Not To Be”, and A2 is “Et Tu” i.e. “And you?” (The question is to the player) – it’s not such a stretch. There is a literal warning near the ending of route A that “You enter the domain of God!”.

What does 2B say in the opening monologue of the game again?

What happens after you enter said domain of God?

domain of god

The three resources that combine to make a make an “Ark” are from the “Meat Box”, the “Soul Box”, and the “God Box”. One of the questions highlighted multiple times in the plot of the main story is, supposing a “new” “body”, i.e. “again” “body”, i.e. “re” “incarnate”, without the old memories, is the same person or not? These and many other things are laid out explicitly.

“But really, astrology?”

The first mail you get is from tech support.
The second mail you get is from Commander about your dead body.
The third mail is regular scheduled correspondence from the Council of Humanity.

The fourth mail is from 6O,

“2B! Have you heard of “Jupiter Fortune Telling”? It’s all the girls over in R&D have been talking about lately! They say you can examine the color and shape of Jupiter’s Great Red Spot to learn about what kind of luck you’ll have with health, work, and love! Sounds amazing, right? I’ll try it and let you know what I find out!”

Wow, and would you look at that, here’s the idea that there are set personality types, there’s the idea that personality type is independent of profession, and even that names and personality types are the same thing. What a coincidence…

and we need a god worth dying for

…Is that the right answer? What is a coincidence?

Is the name of the main characters a coincidence? Is that the position people want to take? If you pull a weed you will get the garden; it doesn’t matter if not all of these were intended from the onset fully formed in one mind before work began, because they all fit together now at the end. Do you think life is a series of unrelated events? Are you content to drift through a life of isolated incidents? People who are, do not like philosophy, or religion, or real science, or the occult, and will probably not like this game. I feel though the main reason people do not like to find or admit these things is because they think it makes them lower status for not seeing them beforehand – the more explicit, the bigger drop in status. Modulated by the status of the speaker and his position to the viewer of course; if you’re a big enough YouTuber you can say the most obvious things and everyone will Like you. I have no status. I am also not interested in such games. I am interested in how a story is made and how a story works. Automata does these things, among others.

devpop clever/cruel

I am not inclined to think I or social standards know better, neither of which have produced anything of note, than masters which have made things that look like they’ll resonate forever.


It is simple.

silly little things

Automata is simple and straightforward in its structure.
Not just gameplay, not just story, it’s all the way down.

There are hidden things and subtleties too, but they’re all in order: that which is more subtle, more hidden, harder to understand, are also the things that matter less. The things which appear early, appear often, with no frills and no talking in circles: these are the ideas this is about.

A writer who will amount to nothing spends untold time and energy trying to be subtle, coy, complex, thinking things like, “Hmmmm how can I reference philosophers I like and show them as giants influencing culture without being too obvious”,

Then along comes Yoko fuckin Taro and hey you can’t do that

engels and pascal

This path is not obvious. There are a lot of stories today, a lot of writers and audiences today, who have a tendency to go for the complex, to look for something “original”. If it’s simple, it’s not good. If it’s a boring premise, then it must be a boring story. Thus, start everything off “”in media res””, the whole shebang, always be doing something, always be moving, always be crying or exploding, stuff is happening! Aren’t you excited? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here? But you won’t remember it. And if you do remember it, it won’t be because it was complicated. These kinds spend so much time on crafting and playing cute little tricks that they never get around to doing anything else, and so the balance of everything (which includes “anything else”) comes out as a mess. It can be felt. It’s obvious. And if it isn’t obvious at the time, it’ll be obvious 10 years from now.

Automata is the other way around: everything is orderly. The big things happen the most frequently and the most loudly, the small things only now and again. Where there are holes, it’s never the big things. There are a few holes, but they are few, and they’re vastly outnumbered by the number of little things I didn’t notice last time, and in all likelyhood still more things I’ll find next time. The creators cared about things in the right order. It shows. And it helps: because everything is simple and internally consistent, when the slightest effortless change is added, a wonderful fluorish appears: “Wow… I wonder what else this could be?”

As above, so below. Simple is complex.

Less is more.

you did great 2b
thank you for all you've done

this exists solely because facebook seems to default to the final image of a post for its preview image. apparently you can control it by setting a html meta property, but that's not allowed in free wordpress. what is allowed though is putting down images in html and then setting them to not show up. so this technically is the last image - as far as facebook is concerned.

Bricking a Computer, Search, Decisions

“Good to see you again, son.”
“Hello, Doctor.”
“Everything that follows, is a result of what you see here.”
“What do I see here?”
“I’m sorry, my responses are limited. You must ask the right questions.”

I, Robot

This is a linear recollection record of experience. This is not a technical guide.

On 2020_02_15 I decided to get around to doing something I’d wanted to do: put a Tweeter repost bot on my Discord server. Had looked into an RSS bot previously, didn’t do it, forget reason. First google result at the time was QTweet by Tom’, added bot, after fiddling around with Discord permissions, worked, but said it couldn’t function the way I wanted to because something about Twitter developer limit 5000 something something, what are options, one was host your own QTweet bot. I have a friend who knows some more things about computers than I do, I didn’t understand what I was looking at too much, hey how difficult would this be, looks really simple, ok handhold me. Get Tweeter developer token thing, Discord app token thing, follow the instructions laid out by Tom’ except for here and there where it was marginally different because everything gets update way too often, ok bot set up. Works perfectly.

Then I BSOD’d.

It was immediately obvious what the cause was: I was starting up Nox, and Nox failed to complete its loading bar. Did it again, BSOD’d again. Okay, what if I turn off Docker, run Nox, BSOD, ok so Nox just doesn’t like Docker existing. What does google say about running Nox and Docker (the thing hosting the bot on my machine) at the same time, there was some guy that said some thing 2 years ago about Hyper-V, turn it off, okay, turned Hyper-V off in Windows Features and SVM in BIOS, Docker says it won’t start, ok that’s fine, what about Nox, BSOD. At some point it BSOD’d twice and I got sent to the Recovery Environment (RE), that place with Startup Repair, System Restore, Command Line (CMD), and like two or three other things. I believe I picked Restore or something, booted, checked Docker, it was gone. Okay, I guess I won’t be hosting a bot, start up Nox, that was the last time I was able to get into Windows 10 (W10).

Now I was stuck in RE. Okay… so how big is this problem? I had built this computer and moved from W7 in 2019_12 and at the time I was adamant about having a W7 dual boot, Ryzen can’t do W7 unless you have a PS2 keyboard, I have a PS2 keyboard, still had to press weird (not the expected) buttons in order to select enough things to complete installation, then move files while in W10 to make USB3 functional, in any case I had a fully functional but bare W7; RE had a boot menu option alongside the other things, would you like to go to W10 or W7, W7, hey everything here works just fine. “Everything” meaning a beautiful 85% nude woman stretching across both monitors. And of course the Aero taskbar. So it’s not a hardware issue.

Started trawling google. Went through a lot of pages.
These are some of those things.

CRITICAL_PROCESS_DIED
boot safe mode
fail to boot to safe mode
Windows 10 Startup Repair
Windows 10 bootrec /fixboot
FIX bootrec /FixBoot Access Denied
error 0x0000001
fixboot acceess denied
bootrec /rebuildbcd dual boot
What Is System Reserved Partition
system reserved partition
Quickly Fix – SFC Scannow
windows resource protection could not perform the requested operation
windows 10 assign system partition
error 0x0000098
BCD Boot error 0xc000000f
UEFI: USB OR JUST USB?
cannot boot eufi usb

Not a representative sample. Total pages opened corresponding to this episode are 132 on the phone. Doing anything on a phone is exceedingly difficult, though some of it is definitely how some of the way we do things is set up, I’ll get into that later. But for the first half of this episode that’s what I was on, a 7″ screen going through a hundred pages of things.

At some point doing one of these things caused RE to no longer load and thus inability to get into W7. Had been doing things through CMD, but having to use a USB-based CMD and being aware I couldn’t get into anything even if I wanted to now was a change. Friend who helped me set up bot had gone to bed. Another friend tried pointing me to a few things but I’d already seen those, they couldn’t do anything because they only had a phone for the long weekend. Tried remaking USB for an old W10 ISO that was pointed to in some 2-year old post, that page no longer existed, ok whatever update USB to newest W10 build. Had tried to go to bed earlier, now 5AM, can’t stay awake anymore, go to bed.

Up 9AM. A third friend said this stuff was beyond him, sent me to reddit’s buildapc Discord, a guy there almost immediately said reinstall windows, came back in the afternoon, asked again, same guy, this time explained a bit and had a convo about what steps i did and already looked through, same conclusion.

Friend who helped me set up bot spent the majority of the day with me attempting to get W10 to boot.

We gave up in the end. Reinstalled W10.

That – is the boring part that doesn’t matter.

I say things like “ok whatever” because it’s a real cheap way to change direction in writing, not because that’s how I felt at the time, this isn’t a movie either, I don’t have an interest in conveying those details, this is just a linear recall record. Suffice to say: I was real bored on the afternoon of 02_15, and by the Gods did I get what I fucking asked for and I got fucked real fuckin good.

The interesting parts are why this or that part happened, and why they went the way they did.

Because they could’ve went a lot differently. This was evidently true with the friend who helped set up the bot, because by coincidence, he wasn’t just reading the instructions and translating, he was doing it too. He found out Nox and Docker BSODed. No “hmm I wonder if it’s because I’m on Windows 10 build 5555”, no “Have you tried turning it off and on again”, ok it’s Nox and Docker. He said, roughly, he decided he’d deal with it tomorrow, dealt with it before joining back up the next day. Did some reading before executing, executed -removed Docker- and then Nox worked just fine. Apparently uninstalling Docker the standard way isn’t sufficient, you have to do some extra fiddling. So Docker is Bad Civilization. But in any case he didn’t go through all this same crap, even though roughly speaking he started in the same place. Well, maybe not. He has different attitudes towards everything. And he knows computers a lot more than I do. But that’s Beyond The Scope Of This Paper and The Proof Is Left As An Exercise For The Reader.

Similarly, I probably could’ve not fucked up as much as I did, as well as fucked up a lot more than I actually did.

Sometime on the night of 02_15 I got real irritated of going through so many pages on a phone, as well as just some of these pages were near-unreadable on such a scale, and remembered I have a couple old laptops around. Took one out, booted, aah so much better. It’s not 2×24″, but 17″ is alright, and a full flat keyboard isn’t a daskeyboard Ultimate, but it sure fuckin beats swipes. I wonder what the average swipe typing speed is? Maybe it’s faster for some people I suppose, but my WPM is 110 and my phone speed is definitely a lot lower than 110. Anyways that’s all nice and good, except I can’t use web Discord because this browser is too old. Actually I can’t go to a lot of pages because this browser is too old. Also svchost.exe burns up to 90% RAM for no good reason (out of 4GB), went through generic msconfig and services motions of clearing out stuff I don’t recognize, down to 50%, okay that’s fine I guess. Then I got Discord and Chrome up and, aside from keyboard feeling bad and no mouse, it was pretty good.

Being on a laptop rather than phone also helped me think more clearly. I had started taking notes earlier but the physical fact of a 17″ screen at 30″ distance interacted via KBM is significantly different from 7″ at 12″ touchscreen. No, I suppose distance from eyeballs isn’t the right measurement. There’s a difference between doing something with your hands out in front of you, versus close to the chest. Like how you can tell a lot about someone’s personality from how they walk. Or what they look like for that matter. 10-1 odds fat guy doesn’t have any initiative. “But genetics” I’ll tell you what, feel free to bet on the 1, your money will be safe with me.

Shortly before getting out the laptop (which I opened a total of 88 tabs on for this episode) (oh yeah its battery never charged above 0%) I started taking notes. Perhaps, in a certain sense, I was trying to understand what was going on, but I’m not sure that’s the way I would put it. I would say it’s more that I was frustrated and, supposing I don’t give up and do something else, what I do at a certain stage of escalation is enumerate everything to figure out what is going on. A long time ago I thought I was interested in computers, but the more I deal with them I think it has nothing to do with computers. What I like are things that work and things that respond in ways that make sense. That sounds more emotional than physical, and I would agree; I think the emotional is more real than anything else. I saw a line browsing /g/ around the time I moved from W7: “People are nostalgic when the frustration came from something not working as intended, rather than today when the frustration is from it working exactly as it is meant to.”. Computers for end users don’t have that property anymore.

I had some understanding of what I was looking at since I’d read bits and pieces of CMD stuff before. Fluency measurement is always a question of what you’re looking for, but just imagine, someone looking for solutions to the scale of fixing boot-level problems, and not knowing what “cd” and “dir” do. Just follow what the nice guy in the video on the first result on google says. Pay attention now, he’s telling you to “format c: /fs:fat32”. Type that into the black box, just like he did, press enter, and then press enter again. What’s the worst that can happen? That’s not the problem I had, but looking at the comments on some of these pages, there are actually people out there who met that fate. The problem I had was different: I had no idea why the instructions I were given didn’t work. Or rather, some of them sometimes worked, some of them always worked, some of them never worked, and overall the problem wasn’t solved.

One commonly recommended sequence was

bootrec /scanos
bootrec /fixmbr
bootrec /fixboot
bootrec /rebuildbcd

/scanos Sometimes worked. It always detected W7, half the time detected W10. Formatting system reserved would always reveal W10. /fixmbr always worked. /fixboot never worked. /rebuildbcd worked if /scanos worked, except sometimes after detecting but before executing it would say “requested system device cannot be found”, and sometimes setting the relevant partition in diskpart to be active, it’d find it. Also after /rebuild it would never find W10 again.

I started drawing out a map for this and other logic nets because lined paper is for plebs and I am a noble peasant, I need to figure out what in god’s name is going on where so I can reproduce results that make a lick of sense. I would have no problem being a pleb if I was given a map, but maps either do not exist or are real hard to find. Searches are fucking broken and everyone in this society is alone.

Why did I go through 132+88 pages in attempting to fix this problem? Is it because the problem is 132+88 of difficulty, no, because less than 1 in 10 of them said anything about how anything worked and more than 9 in 10 were just repeats of each other. Not only were they repeats, they were bad repeats. Putting aside for the moment the problem W10 is bringing upon itself by having such frequent updates, I have a serious doubt as to how much any of these guys writing up guides know what they’re telling people to do. Why are all the how-to’s today all presented in linear steps 1-10, or 5 different ways to get the result? In a sense, you don’t need to know how a car actually fuck cars I hate cars. In a sense you don’t need to know how a computer works if you’re just going to use it, but these sorts of things messing with system configs are Not “just going to use it”. Random nobodies like me shouldn’t be touching stuff or asking questions like this anyways. But answering questions that you don’t know how to derive the answer to is a significantly bigger sin. At time of writing, the first result on bing and the second result on google for “Windows Won’t Boot”  is an article from MakeUseOf titled “Windows 10 Won’t Boot? 12 Fixes to Get Your PC Running Again”. Do you think the guy who wrote it has a clue how windows boot works? By the way, just a reminder: your money will be safe with me.

Page after page after page of result says do this do that but next to none of it says anything about any of it works.

“How does it work” is a real simple difference from a “How To”: how-to’s are linear and how-does-it-work aren’t, “aren’t” meaning, supposing this doesn’t work, it might be these other things. “5 Ways To” type things are like five fingers on a hand, understanding how something works is like five twigs on a tree, which ones, the answer is yes.

A good representation of this is code documentation (Unity and W3Schools are good ones I know of), currently at least the common format is a left-side bar menu that expands and collapses (it’s called a tree), main panel has a bunch of text explanations as to what commands exist and what variables you can change, what they mean, and 1 in 5 words is a link to some other place in the documentation to read more. It’s not everything of course, you still have to have some fundamental understanding of certain things at some point, but it’s fundamentally different from “5 Ways To”. Do people not see this? I have to imagine they don’t because that’s what’s in front of me. A great non-code example of excellent explanations is from IRS. The taxmen are really competent with this sort of thing, no surprise, “code” is an ancient word for “set of laws”. I once converted an IRA to a ROTHIRA and the brokerage man asked beforehand something like ‘and you have consulted with a tax expert on this already’ or something to that effect and I said yes, even though I hadn’t, simply because I was confident in what the IRS had written in 590-A, 590-B, and 1099-R. Every paragraph had at least two or three references either to another paragraph in that document if not a specific paragraph in another document, and it was clear words were chosen and said carefully. I had read all the paragraphs every paragraph I read pointed to until I ran out of relevant ones to read, and followed all the instructions. The only thing left was to sign the dotted line. “5 Ways To” can never instill such confidence. It’s the blind leading the blind until it happens to work, upon which there is a gushing of THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU SAVED ME, not so much because solving the problem was important, which is a ridiculous notion anyways, there exist no problems you don’t have to solve, but because they had no idea what was going on, and now, they still have no idea what’s going on. From desperation, to desperation. In the end nothing changed.

Which is fine, if that’s what you want. The cost/risk is that if everything goes wrong, as was the case with people who did format c: /fs:fat32, not being aware that c: was referencing the system volume rather than boot volume, that using a recovery disk switches around the letters on things – you will be fucked, and still you will have no idea what went on. This isn’t sarcastic, because the other choice is being aware to some degree, which is much more costly. In my case I did format the system drive correctly, reloaded it with bcdboot c:\windows /s s: but it didn’t end up making W10 or W7 bootable. I spent a day trying to fix this problem. If I had just tried “5 Ways To” and just skipped ahead to the Final Solution of Just Reinstall Windows, I would’ve saved that time. But that wasn’t important to me. I did reinstall windows so it’s not like Winning was the point either. I wanted to not reinstall, sure, but if I couldn’t, I wanted to know was *why* I had to reinstall. Why does /scanos detect W10 sometimes but not others but always detects W7? Why does /rebuildbcd make W10 disappear from /scanos after executing? Why does /fixboot always result in “access denied”; what are these other solutions to that problem supposed to be doing in attempt to get around that? For these and many others I got some answers to. I wish I got more. And maybe there are more, but I had spent ~16h already and couldn’t be bothered anymore. In the 15th hour or so the search results finally pointed me to Microsoft Documentation, which cleared up some things. Why weren’t these referenced in *any* of the 132+88 pages I went to? I don’t know. Why does typing out 10 words of the title of a fanny pack on Amazon into the Amazon search not put that item in the first page (56) of results, by putting those same 10 words + Amazon into Google give it as the first result? I don’t know. I don’t care anymore.

I wonder whose fault it is. Maybe I shouldn’t look for someone in particular because it’s obviously quite a few.

Then reinstalling was extra smooth and fast because I had prepared a majority of things beforehand.

In setting up W10 I did what I had some inkling of when I first built W7 in 2011, which was “put windows on its own disk”. At the time I tried putting it on an SSD, for reasons I don’t remember I didn’t, good thing too because the SSD went into “panic lock” some time later, a really retarded concept on old SSDs, don’t look it up if you like brain cells, tldr everything on that drive was lost. So I only had to recreate my porn folder, oh no. Anyways 2019_12 the setup was: NVME W10+W7, SSD programs, and bringing over the two HDD’s from W7, using the old W7 boot drive as a storage disk. Other than W10 being fucking ugly as all hell goddamn I hate flat design, the major unknown was only in figuring out how to “take ownership”, that’s the correct term, of all the files under Users in the old W7 drive. Minor problems after that included some things weren’t transferred because I didn’t think of them as transferable. Other than that all files were already present, and programs I had put together a Master Install List spreadsheet/checklist of names of things, category of purpose, names of files, and put them in a folder together, so all I needed to do was check off all the boxes.

Reinstalling W10 changed contents in the volume W10 was on. Chose “Custom Install”, which moved the broken W10 to a “Windows.old” folder inside the new W10, in other words doubling the space occupied on the volume, but that was fine because I had set the volume to 150GB, W10 itself takes up 40, again all my programs and files are elsewhere, so it took up 80/150 from 40/150. “Custom Install” meant I theoretically had access to those things that last time “weren’t transferred because I didn’t think of them as transferrable”, generally speaking, user configurations. Example from my case: brushes, colors, shortcuts and menu configuration in Clip Studio Paint. These sorts of things are generally found in the User\Appdata folder. Copied those over to the new W10 location, no need to take ownership because same volume, theory here is actually practice and, after the usual reinstall etc., suddenly everything’s back to the way I like it. Some of them I didn’t even have to reinstall, but I don’t know the logic there.

The problems I thought I would encounter with licenses all turned out not to be the case. Microsoft Office 2010 license key worked fine, though I don’t remember if I had a spare license or not. DisplayFusion and NitroPDF I only had 1, my impression was I have to un-assign them from one computer before I can use them on another, which was because of the above not available to me; they worked fine. Nitro even asked me after installation, not for the activation key, but if I wanted to *deactivate* and remove the key. Why? Maybe because I put them on a separate drive beforehand and was just re-registering with Windows? I don’t know. Do I care? Yes, but not enough to wade through 132+88 “5 Ways To” again, fuck that shit. Clip Studio Paint was fantastic, logged into my account, what license would you like to use, I only have one license, click, welcome back. They apparently have cloud backup of user settings and you can set it to update every time the program closes, didn’t know that before. Have not ever considered using cloud backup till this point, now I see its value. Cloud means you Don’t Own Your Data, but the question is always “compared to what”, and the comparison here is, for most people who don’t have desktops or any understanding of even manual copy-paste backups, or CTRL+C/CTRL-V at all, 16h of 132+88.

16h of 132+88 is correctly interpreted as “impossible”.

Oh yeah all my browser tabs transferred with no effort on my part because something something google, presumably. I use Iron, which is some ‘privacy-minded’ chromium build, but chromium is off chrome, and I believe it had all my history and tabs and bookmarks because I have this “sync” thing on, which means cloud, which means You Don’t Own Your Data. Which sounds Evil, and perhaps it is. But on the scale of “Things Work” to “Not Evil”, I am Lazy and this stuff is Good. Not a fan of “This is old and not supported!!!”, one would imagine that the oldest things should be *the most* supported, but that’s not the world we live in. Or if it is (it probably is), we can’t find them. Microsoft Documentation is page No One Cares of Google when you search for how to fix your stuff.

Are you really fixing your stuff? That’s something I pondered a decent amount.

“According to a survey, it seems that a majority of people have answered that they feel reluctant to be more than 50% cyborg.”

“I do understand the reluctance that those people feel. In the end, it’s a matter of degree. For example, you… You’re quite the cyborg, too.”

“But I don’t use artificial arms, artificial legs, or artificial organs.”

“But you do have some form of portable information terminal, right?”

“Well, yes… but doesn’t everyone?”

“A costume device, too?”

“Of course.”

“And, at home, you probably have home automation and an AI secretary.”
“Yes.”

“What would happen to you if all the data in those devices was lost due to a disaster or accident?”

“Well… I wouldn’t be able to do any work until it gets restored.”

“When you entrust so much of your everyday life to those electronic devices, the argument that you aren’t a cyborg isn’t very convincing. To you, those portable terminals are already your second brain. Isn’t that right?

It can be said that the history of science is a history of the expansion of the human body’s functionality, in other words, the history of man’s cyberization. That’s why it’s a matter of degree.”

Psycho-Pass

If you are following a “5 Ways To”, how much are you really doing it? If I am going through my problems with a friend who’s looking stuff up for me to try out as well as just having his understanding to pick through in general, how much am I really doing it? If I am reading through IRS documentation and following their instructions to the letter, am I making decisions, or am I a temporary apparatchik? If I store my stuff on some cloud service, is that data that I can retrieve really less “mine” than the data in my old panic locked SSD?

Things really don’t work the way we think they do.

Sometimes they do though. I was a bit afraid at some point I might’ve screwed up the W7 install since I couldn’t get into it anymore. At first it was confusing, but early on I unplugged all the other drives and only had the NVME, so there were only ever 4 volumes that showed up: USB, W10, W7, and System Reserved. I was careful to not touch the W7 volume the whole time, at least, I never targeted it with any command. No way to check if that meant nothing happened though. Just had to hope.

After reinstalling W10 and setting up EasyBCD again, which is just a simple reskin of the built-in Windows bootloader, chose W7 at startup, booted.

Everything was just as I’d left it.

Most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.

[Review] Your Lie in April

8/8

original form as tweeter thread here

Shigatsu wa Kimi no Uso / Your Lie in April was a religious experience for me. I would not have seen what I did had I not seen it at the time I did. Reading over some of its criticisms I feel compelled to illustrate an alternative way to look at it.

YLIA is a parable. It takes the form of a “story” because that’s what is ‘allowed’ today. “So many characters are flat plot devices!” Yes. That’s the idea.

YLIA is not a dramatic romance about music. The closest anime I can point to is not White Album 2, but Over Drive.

What is the point of a story? If your answer is “to accurately simulate events”, you will not like YLIA. But neither is YLIA for you.

Tone > Themes > Characters > Plot > Lore

This is my personal preference. I graft this upon YLIA. Is it right? Maybe not. But it fits great.

Something I’m not used to is symbolism, but I saw it here. For the first half, it was difficult seeing characters and settings and artstyle etc. What’s king in a drawing? It’s not anatomy. It’s not lighting. It’s composition.

For the first half of YLIA all I saw was the king.

Kaori is the Lord, or Master.
The Piano is God, or Truth.
Music is Intent, or Imagination.
The Stage is Life. You are there, you are alone; Everything outside it is dark because you are in the light; What you do every second matters.

YLIA in one line:

Act sincerely with a beautiful image in mind, and you will embed yourself in the heart of the world forever.

“Kaori is the Lord, or Master”: I’ve been rereading Hagakure. The first half of YLIA is Hagakure in modern anime form. Kaori is a girl because male bonding is rarely depicted today. Kaori is Kousei’s Lord. Most similar anime relationship is Iskander-Waver of Fate/Zero.

How is archetypal Kaori depicted? Golden Backlit. Backlit is when you are looking towards the light. Light is visual for Ideal. What is Gold?

Kaori is in front, Kousei is following, this is the same of their emotional dynamics, what is this relationship, it’s Lord and Retainer.

“A king […] must exemplify the extreme of all things, good and evil. That is exactly why his subjects envy and adore him. Why the flame of wanting to be like the king can burn in the hearts of every civilian.”

– Iskander. Iskander is a king. Sounds like Kaori though, right?

“As a king, it is my duty to present a dream.
And as one of my subjects, it is your duty to see the dream to the end and speak of it to the future.”

-Iskander

“Do you really think you can forget? No. Not a chance. You live for that moment too. Because you’re a musician, just like me.

Unprecedented. One mishap after another.

Even so, the people here will never forget us.”

– Kaori

That’s the first half. The second half I couldn’t see well. Less familiar territory; I had originally guessed OP1 was a final ED/insert, so YLIA is “After the End” for me. Given the lyrics of ED2, I imagine it’s “After the Death of the King”.

This is the core of YLIA. The rest of is the same thing with tweaks and lower amplitude, e.g. Kousei is the Lord for Emi and Aiza. Minor details are just to break up the monotony or other expediency reasons.

Kousei looks to Kaori. Kaori looks to “Elohim”.

What is Elohim?

In the second Iskander quote, he said “kousei” somewhere in that ‘tell this to posterity’ half.

YLIA’s Kousei is 公生, which means “Public Life”.

I am not inclined to believe the name of the main character is an accident.

All this implies 1) This is the right track 2) There is more.

“I know we can do it.”
“There was resolve in your eyes. So what was it that you saw in me?”

“You have me. Look up, and look at me.

Look at me.”

YLIA kaori archetype backlit

Japan’s Karaage and Anime Industrial Policy

LAWSON FGO Campaign Banner

A LAWSON in Kyoto

The contents of this post were, with a few exceptions, written last year.

2018 November 16~22 I visited Japan, primarily in the interest of inspecting land usage and public space. I wrote up what I expected to be the majority of my thoughts on that here, but in commenting through the uploaded 562 pictures there turned out to be a few things where there was a lot more to say.

The end wordcount of the “main” post excluding the references section was around 12k.

The end wordcount of the “comments” on the pictures exceeded 26k.

One idea in the comments I’ve found myself revisiting on multiple occasions: the text composing the main body of that idea is what is presented here. I’m not sure it’s the most important idea, but its prevalence along with the anniversary seems to desire a reformatting into a more legible post. Imgur albums aren’t really easy to read, and I had put everything in chronological order. Perhaps blog posts aren’t the easiest to read either, but that’s the next step up that is available to me.

The idea has to do with the anime industry, or rather, the social structure that builds off of it, and the same social structure it pulls its talents from. The closest concept I know to describe this is “Industrial Policy”. It seems to fit with what I’ve read from the MITI book (which I still haven’t finished). It may not be industrial policy per se, but the spirit is the same – and the Code matters less than the Hammurabi anyways. That’s discussed in the main post, which again can be found here, but reading that is not a prerequisite. If anything, this post poses the question that the other one answers.

This post has two parts. They are mostly independent and mostly reach the same destination, but take different paths. “Karaage” is more about the environment and negative space, whereas “Anime” is more direct and builds the actual thing.

There are two images near the middle which have fully italicized text; those were added with this post. The rest of the text is original, changed only to add a few links.

The image album containing all the images used in this post can be found here.

Further thoughts on Japan can be found here.


> Convenience Stores, Road Signs and Karaage
–> Konbinis
–> Onigiris
–> Mega Don Quixote
–> Karaage and Road Signs
> Doujinshi, NicoNico, and the Anime Industry



NOV 17, DAY 2

LAWSON FGO Campaign Banner-stand

awwwww yeeeeeeeeeeaahh

i have no idea what it reads though (“kyanpen”? camping?? did i screw up “n”/”no”/”so” again?) so i wasn’t able to figure out what FGO deals LAWSON had until accidentally stumbling upon an employee doing something the next day.

my sister visited FamilyMart, LAWSON, and 7-11 and said the specializations that she could tell were “7-11 has more daily specials and LAWSON is for weebs”.

i know at least that last one is correct. i stuck to LAWSONs simply because i saw anime out front.

LAWSON Copy Machine

a waist-sized copy machinery!
unmanned!
in a convenience store!
right next to puddings, an atm, and the microwavables!

(and porn mags!)

LAWSON center aisle

the FGO “campaign” can be seen in this picture.

i didn’t notice because of the endless variety of stuff they managed to stick in such a small place.

(it seems like i didn’t take a picture around the time i noticed the next day, so it’ll come later.)

LAWSON refrigerated open section

you can really have quite a lot of types of things if you don’t try to make them unnecessarily big, or insist on having an unnecessary quantity of each type of item.

i don’t know anything about food supply chains, but here’s one about cars:

“Finally, space utilization at NUMMI (California) showed a modest improvement (7.0sqft/unit/yr) over Framingham (8.1) and GM-Fremont (7.9), but was still far from the Takaoka level (4.8). This reflects that fact that the GM facilities, including Fremont, were all designed to stock several weeks of parts. NUMMI parts inventories averaged two days.

This inventory level was still above the two hour level prevailing in Takaoka, primarily due to difficulties in running true Just-In-Time from Japan and the U.S. Midwest.”

something else that probably helps is some items aren’t… what’s the right word here? “guaranteed?” to the left here a few of the microwavable meals can be seen, and on more than one occasion i was able to see the employee restock them. and the items were different. like rather than a shelf spot being a specific product, it was a certain range of products, and if you got there at some point in the day versus another, depending on who bought what before you, what’d be available to you would be different.

this was definitely true for the microwavable meals. i’m not sure how far the principle extends.

LAWSON magazines

friendship broken with porn mags
now anime girl campaign banners are my best friend

LAWSON hot drinks

these are actually hot.

these are also right at the end of a refrigerated section (that TEA at the left is cold).

LAWSON wines, rice products, canned food

LAWSON rice products 1/2

LAWSON rice products 2/2

LAWSON canned food


NOV 19, DAY FOUR

LAWSON FGO karaage front
surprise! convenience store karaage! this is what the campaign was about. included is a toothpick.

i happened to notice this because the employee had just finished frying the chicken and was putting it in the display or whatever it’s called (if you look at the earlier picture, there’s rows and rows of it). there was a frier in the back, and not rows and rows of friers, a single one, and not american “in the back”, maybe three or four steps away from the cashier spot, and maybe zero to one steps from that little door they use to go in and out. clearly visible to the public – if you looked in that direction.

i wanted to take a picture of it and everything on the employee side of the counter, but he told me no. which is unfortunate. that convenience store was my happy place.

riyo art made it better. god’s gift to the world. god bless riyo.

LAWSON FGO karaage rear

“but was the chicken good tho”

yes.
it was.


NOV 17, DAY 2

LAWSON canned food

these were the best. rice balls. for about a dollar. this was one of the more expensive ones, probably because of the non-rice filling in the center. they’re opened by pulling (hard to see here) a tab from the top down the middle, which separates the two halves, then you pull the two remaining parts out. and they’re filling. one of these makes you not hungry, two of these make you stuffed.

it took me a few of these to finally not screw it up, because the wrapping isn’t just on the outside, but between the seaweed and the rice too (so the seaweed stays dry and the rice stays wet).

how did they manage to do that?

apparently (read) it’s done by machine too, not slave labor or something. and it’s not like those crappy “edible” plastic either, the plastic between the rice and seaweed was the same type – and connected! – to the plastic between the seaweed and the outside. how is this even possible? can machines even do something so intricate? would such machines be pointed to making plastic origami on dollar foods?

i mean. apparently the answer is yes. i held it in my hand.

but i’m still going to ask the question.


NOV 19, DAY FOUR

LAWSON canned food

fourth day, 6:40 on a monday, early enough to see what a fully stocked meal section looks like.

i didn’t drive here. i walked here. like maybe five minutes. and not an american five minute walk either, it was nice and comfy the whole way. walk down one big road, turn right on a corner, walk down another big road. and not an amer- you get the idea (i’m still going to repeat in other comments). though if i drove here it’d be easy, there’s a bajillion tiny parking lots nearby.

google says 300m, estimate of 5 minutes.

this reminds me, all these items actually have expiration dates on them. or more accurately, expiration times. some of them have it by hour, others by half( or third)-day. at least for all the times i looked, they all expired on the same day sometime in the evening. i imagine if i was here to see japan at night, those times would move to the early afernoon instead.

this also reminds me, i found that the food here was better than the food at the chain restaurants. and so for all three of my dinners in Tokyo, i ate convenience store food. also because my feet hurt. i really wanted to eat at a conveyer belt sushi place once, and Tsukiji Outer Market another. it was just a short way away too. but short distances become enormous when you can’t do them easily.

like how people don’t want to go anywhere in america even though they’ll all defend the ultimate virtue of their Personal Freedom Machine. that i believe is the real reason behind amazon’s rise in america. this one-click order or that free two-day shipping is next to inconsequential. two days? why not two years? i could get nice things here in almost two minutes, and i was having a good two minutes the whole time.

LAWSON canned food


NOV 18, DAY THREE

konbini onigiri

the photo timestamp is 2018 Nov 18, 05:55:42. breakfast. i had gotten this the previous morning, Nov 17, purchased around 07:40 or so, but i’d been in there for 10 minutes and it wasn’t being restocked at that time. it spent the whole day in my (unrefrigerated) backpack.

the numbers there are clearly about 18 Nov 17, and the one after that says “11 hours after noon”.

admittedly, i don’t know what the four characters at the front of that line say. but it seems clear enough.

it tasted great by the way. would recommend.


NOV 19, DAY FOUR

konbini spaghetti

the photo timestamp is 2018 Nov 19, 06:59:02. breakfast. i got it that morning. i don’t remember if it was hot or not. it was in the refrigerated section and the store attendant definitely asked me if i wanted it heated up (they have microwaves behind the counter), but i don’t remember if i said yes for this one.

the numbers on this one say 18 Nov 20, “5 hours before noon”.

i just noticed that the meaning changes in translation. it’s not “noon minus 5”, but more like, “the 5th hour on the half of the day before noon”. same after, but there the error is benign.

The numbers below that say microwave 1500W for 25s, or 500W for 1m15s.

“wouldn’t it be fucking amazing if, given that every microwaveable food in the world gives a baseline wattage its cooking times were designed for, there were a single microwave oven on the market whose wattage was visible anywhere in front of it

“Actually true in Japan. Wattage listed on the front, and paxkages have two wattage/times so you have an idea if yours doesn’t match.”


NOV 20, DAY FIVE

odaiba karaage donburi

this was the best part of Odaiba. kaarage donburi – fried chicken rice bowl. also comes with a lot of lettuce, or something, and free miso soup, which seems to be standard next to water/green tea. the ??dressing packet?? and the little bowl of ?? sauce came with it. the drink did not. i want to say under 1000, but i don’t remember. couldn’t have been higher than 1400. there’s a food court right as you walk in Diver City, i got this from the one in the back at the far-right. there were two karaage shops, i think i chose this one because the menu was easier to read.

that karaage was good.

it was eating this meal that it dawned on me that it was possible for fried chicken to be a delicacy.

i was probably supposed to use the packet sauce on the lettuce? and the bowl sauce on the chicken. but i didn’t notice the packet at first and poured the bowl over the lettuce. 3coins ooops.

then Odaiba returned to being crap.


NOV 21, DAY SIX

mega don quixote storefront

this place plays the dunkey theme song!

everything was really cheap here. or, that’s my impression.

basically the first thing i see coming in, which is the second box on the rightmost visible row, the yellow bottles, were CC lemons, like double the size of the ones i’d been getting from vending machines. vending machines sold them for like 120. here the label says… well it says 29, but i read the 69 next to it because 29 is just impossible.

right? it’s impossible right? like it’s 29 after you buy a certain amount of them or something right?

they can’t possibly be selling such a big bottle for 29Y right??

???

Mega Don Quijote.

mega don quixote shoplift warning

did you know shoplifting is a crime?

this is in front of the elevators.

mega don quixote elevators/directory

for reference, this felt like an unusually messy map/schematic wall. whether it is or not i don’t know, because i didn’t walk into any other place like this.

then again, there aren’t many places like the Mega/Shibuya branch of Don Quijote.

mega don quixote interior non-panoramic

mega don quixote interior panoramic

i didn’t even notice the ceiling was undecorated, i was so busy looking at all the stuff around me.

i felt like goddamn Boris Yeltsin when he walked into an american supermarket.

“At JSC, Yeltsin visited mission control and a mock-up of a space station. According to Houston Chronicle reporter Stefanie Asin, it wasn’t all the screens, dials, and wonder at NASA that blew up his skirt, it was the unscheduled trip inside a nearby Randall’s location.

Yeltsin, then 58, “roamed the aisles of Randall’s nodding his head in amazement,” wrote Asin. He told his fellow Russians in his entourage that if their people, who often must wait in line for most goods, saw the conditions of U.S. supermarkets, “there would be a revolution.” […]

Yeltsin asked customers about what they were buying and how much it cost, later asking the store manager if one needed a special education to manage a store. In the Chronicle photos, you can see him marveling at the produce section, the fresh fish market, and the checkout counter. He looked especially excited about frozen pudding pops.”

“When they got into the store, as one of the guys remember, the manager appeared and helped them to see the store in detail. “Yeltsin asked how many different goods are in store. The store staff answered that there is around 30,000 different things for sale now.

Yeltsin then said – did I get the number correctly? Does my interpreter misheard the seller?”.”

oh, so this is the feeling i have about convenience stores. i just didn’t recognize the connection because i knew the Yeltsin story was about a supermarket, and neither FamilyMart nor LAWSON had stuff like fresh produce or raw meat, so it just missed the cut. i don’t remember if i saw fresh produce here. but there was definitely a meat section. so here, it connected.

this is a walmart. except cheaper. and it’s filled with more stuff, with none of it being made of shit.

and it does it all without imposing a black desert upon its surroundings or being one itself.

oh. oh, this is the feeling i have about trains and land use in japan.

“You cannot learn a thing you think you know.” – “America #1!”

oh, and just so i don’t forget, there was this one picture i really regret having missed. i was on some other floor and, forget what was in the front and back, but down the middle was an aisle, and some old ladies were walking the opposite way. to the right was bicycles. to the left….. was Tengas.

someone really had their priorities straight.

mega don quixote toilet

discount store means continued high quality toilets!


NOV 20, DAY FIVE

tokyo road signs

it struck me as odd that there were 6 separate signs here. i don’t think i’ve ever seen more than one in america, except maybe at airports, which sort of don’t count.

i was telling myself some stories about how in america, the buyer (DOT obviously, but bear with me) wants to save money because there’s probably a flat cost per item, so he buys one big one rather than multiple little ones, and so the suppliers started revolving around that, and “invisibly” charging more and more for each sign, because there’s fewer suppliers there’s less reason to do better work, so the signs become more crap, and because there’s few suppliers and few big signs, any time there’s any work it’s either replacing the whole thing or (not) carefully changing parts of it, so either it’s expensive and/or it doesn’t look good… unlike here, where if something changes they can just change the direction part. the name part probably isn’t going to change. Tokiwabashi is probably newer so that’s why it’s separate.

that was all off of looking at these signs. i don’t know how much of that is real, of course. i was pulling stuff out of my * walking along this path (Tokiwa bridge is actually probably the oldest thing up there) i hadn’t planned to go down because i exited the wrong exit of a really long station and my feet were killing me so onwards it is. but that’s the feeling i had when i saw it, given everything i had seen so far.

why do convenience stores, in america, sell industrial waste labelled as food? because at some point, someone was selling chicken, and someone else sold worse chicken for cheaper, and enough people went to the latter that the former could no longer run a business.

and you know the words that came out of their mouths too:

“but it’s still chicken. it’s the same thing, just for cheaper”.

and if they were politically inclined: “it’s just competition. same price higher quality or same quality lower price wins. this is how the free market works man.”

repeat ten thousand times and you get chicken “nuggets”.

generalize in various directions to get other true results: why is everything so big in america? “because if you buy more it’s cheaper”. 1) no. “less per unit if you spend more money in total” is not “cheaper”. 2) you can’t use that much anyways. mom once bought barbeque sauce for me, two containers at the size i’d call jars, and it expired before i used half. the one i had opened, i mean. “spend more save more” is a literal religion in america. “but some bigger people can eat that much” no. no, they can’t.

“but small businesses can use that much”

then where are all the stores in america that sell real things to regular people?

based on things like convenience stores, no free parking, and signs like these, along with an infinite number of other things in the way they exist, i don’t think that way exists in japan. sure it’s “more expensive” to get an 100Y onigiri or 550Y meal at a LAWSON than making something yourself. but probably not. not after factoring in the time you spend going to a grocery place probably further away, the electricity/gas to cook, the time cooking and preparing the thing, etc. convenience stores mass produce the things, but also have all their logistics cost and things like rent, their margins probably aren’t that high. it’s not like they’re trying to rip you off. and the food is pretty good. probably better than you can make yourself with no experience in anywhere from the shopping for materials to cooking. so why not? on the matter of just cost, which is what we’re talking about here, it’s a pretty good deal.

it appears to me a society that goes that way results in “pretty good deal”s becoming even better deals over time, as suppliers that can survive can allocate more time and resources, or simply gets better because of having done it enough times to get ideas for improvements. LAWSON meals were legitimately better than the two chains i went to, Nakau and Matsuya. like not even close. convenience stores in Japan closed, nay, reversed the culinary gap with low tier restaurants. if i were to go to a Nakau or Matsuya over a LAWSON, it wouldn’t be because their food was good, but because they provided an air-conditioned seat and served the meals on plastic thicker than 1/16”. or because i could choose my meals specifically rather than it being up to whatever happened to be available on the shelf at that moment. not because the food is better there. it isn’t.

the FGO karaage from earlier was 220 or 240Y. somewhere between 5-8 ~1.5″D ball-ish shapes. crispy skin, juicy meat. it’s fried chicken. but i’ll call it karaage, not because i’m a weeb, but because it’s different.

what can i get at american convenience stores? chicken “nuggets”.
what can i get at wal-mart? more chicken “nuggets”.
what can i get at costco? even more chicken “nuggets”.
and none of them are hot or fresh even when i get them.

“but you can go to a specialty chicken place”

LAWSON isn’t a specialty chicken place. it’s a convenience store. and the number of “specialty places” in japan is unbelievable. it’s basically a misnomer. it is the exception that a place offers more than one kind of thing. but yes, in the american sense: basically everywhere in japan is a “specialty place”.

“but they can do that because it’s denser over there and they all live closer together”

but WHY did they do that? HOW did it get to this point?

i give only slightly more than two shits about the state of affairs as it currently is. obviously everything today is tied to everything else today. duh. the salience is in the lineage of thought, the philosophy which permeates everyday actions that paints how today came from yesterday, and what sort of things today will create for tomorrow. that’s what’s fucking important.

“what does this world want to look like tomorrow?”

there’s a famous picture with four panels, it compares two cities. one: Hiroshima. here’s what it looked like after it was flattened by the atomic bomb, here’s what it looks like today. two: Detroit. here’s what it looked like in the 1940s, here’s what it looks like now.

“Detroit’s a world-class city, it’s been growing in recent years, haters gonna hate!”

chicken nuggets.


DAY SIX, NOV 21

animate shibuya main

Animate Shibuya.

animate shibuya, kizuna ai gachapon

i should’ve recognized it with the Kaguya Luna in the crane game, but this one hit closer to home.

animate shibuya, niconico 1/2

here is where it really started hit home.

animate shibuya, niconico 2/2

this is the music album section. or something. vertical shot of the previous horizontal.

Nico Nico Douga is the Japanese equivalent of YouTube. or so that’s what i’ve always heard, but just as next to every single other word so far, “equivalents” have turned out to be extremely far from equivalent. this is a music section in a store. selling things including but not limited to music. and they have at least one and a half shelves dedicated to “As Seen On YouTube”.

can you imagine that?

random people are making music. and when they become popular enough for it, they start trying to sell albums. and maybe, just maybe, they’ll get noticed by bigger people – or just become really big themselves. “that’s just capitalism and the free market, people offer products other people want, america has that, america’s the best at it!” is it? is it really? does america have a middle class? do american stores have a “As Seen On YouTube” section? if you look up world statistics on small business and self employment rates on different countries and you want in with that mindset, you’re not gonna like what you see. america arrests kids putting up lemonade stands because it violates city health ordinances, japan – well, i don’t know if any of these are made by kids. but i’m going to guess there’s at least a few. i know america doesn’t let kids go to school by themselves. i know in japan, they do.

and that’s where it starts. everything starts at where you can grasp the world.

if you don’t let people understand at the level they do understand, they will never understand. they will never themselves automatically build a structure and path themselves, referencing the people before them and showing the way for the people behind. there’s only “get good and hope and maybe some big studio will hire/acquire me”. and that’s here too, but those basically never happen. it’s like your parents always said, how many people get to work in hollywood? don’t dream of becoming an actor/actress, it won’t happen. and that’s right. if it’s all or nothing, you probably should do something else.

but here, it’s not all or nothing.

there’s a ladder with steps toward the top. a real ladder, one you can see and understand yourself.

animate shibuya, fate 1/4

i’ve mentioned FGO a few times now, and i definitely took these pictures because it’s what i like, but it fits into this story too. even now this picture fits into the story.

americans who realize this problem blame it on capitalism and globalism and how everything competes with every other thing today. are these americans the same americans claiming that america is the land of small businesses and free market competition? i don’t really care about free or not free markets, i care about aesthetics, but even in their jargon lexicon, i don’t think the problem is “competition” (which i think leads to chicken nuggets), but about “intellectual property”.

the way i think about it: “killing off the future”.

everything that exists has a pathway it took to get there. everything starts, in at least a few important senses, from nothing. i think aesthetics is inborn somehow, but having a “taste” doesn’t mean you will make the next big franchise. there’s the the well-treaded things on having a ‘real’ job and the ten thousand technical hours of practice, but the important part is there has to be a pathway up. how many big things in the history of big things have happened because they were doing nothing and then one day the hand of god reached down and anointed them? that’s the standard model in america today. the startup model. which we talked about in the previous picture. the question is why don’t people become big themselves? without the hand of god?

because in america, the hand will flatten you.

it will sue you into oblivion for “stealing”, saying you’re using their image/stuff to make money, they should get a cut, if they don’t sue then the courts will have a precedent and then other people will also do it and all hell will break loose and then nobody will make anything anymore because if you don’t give people exclusive rights for their ideas they’re just not going to have them.

and so they kill off all these people. whether they cause bankruptcy is only the minor point, the important part is they break the heart. why would these people want to make things anymore? do you believe that all the big creators are fueled by inspiration and passion and all the small creators are fueled by greed and money? all people start by copying someone else, and what better to copy than something everyone already likes and appreciates? and so they don’t. and even if this feeling doesn’t spread, the fact that the people disappeared does. all those people that spent all that time learning not only the intricacies of their craft but forming connections to all those other people who spent all their time specializing in something else so they could come together and make something greater, that lineage of creation, the history of community, the real supply line of civilization –

that’s gone now. cut down like a dog.

did you think hollywood has been using old superheroes and remaking old movies because it makes more money? if it’s about money then it’s about china, and they make plenty of things china doesn’t like, like making characters black or gay, no nevermind anything about equality, you thought it was about money. and it is about money. the problem is that they can’t make it. progressivism is something they are trying out because they thought it’d make more money. nostalgia is what they use when they don’t have progressivism, not because it makes “more” money, but because it makes money.

because they don’t know what else to do, and what section of those makes money.

and they did it to themselves.

they killed off all the other people who would have otherwise been there to show them what could be possible. they killed off all the other people who would have been there, either as someone else in the field with even just another set of eyes, or someone off on their own, doing something that is yet to even be recognized as a field. killed off all the people that’d provide free real both technical and creative intelligence. they killed off the rest of the world, leaving them finally alone, with superfluous syllables like “competition” or “property” on one side, and “salaries” and “opportunities” the other. those aren’t real.

what’s real is they killed off the future.

animate shibuya, fate 2/4

how does this relate to FGO?

every book in the previous picture is not official.

the bottom half of this picture is all official, the next picture is mostly nonofficial, i don’t know about the split on the last one. also not sure about the top half here. except the one at the top left, ChanxBox, which is definitely not official because it’s not even about FGO. i would know, i have the book, i bought it long before this trip because i like the artist and heard he was releasing it.on the cover are 18 characters. the number of them that are FGO: 4.

this isn’t some kind of back alley black market place. it’s Animate Shibuya. this is how anime works, and granted, i don’t know much about how the rest of japan works, but given what i’ve seen here and how it fits together with what i have read (about how the rest of japan works (need to finish reading MITI)), it’s not the same picture. the narratives are all wrong, and the colors are not even wrong. japan ostensibly has draconian IP laws. but here’s a place that exists. for a more famous example, japan has censorship of genitals written into their constitution, but everyone knows what that really means.

one of Fate’s biggest spinoffs is called Prisma Ilya. Prisma Ilya started off as a fanfiction, probably selling doujins (literally meaning something like “hobby”, but standalone refers to fanmade books). at some point it got really popular. what did the head guys of Fate do?

recruited and canonized them.

that’s a story i know fairly firmly, but i’ve heard it’s true for some of the others as well. it would last appear to be the case. Fate/Apocrypha and Fate/Prototype here don’t have the same artstyle. i unfortunately don’t know as well behind the story of Fate’s rise, other than it was called Fate before the current popular iteration of FGO, that currently the Sony group is doing poorly everywhere and FGO singlehandedly brings one of them into profit, and that the original guys behind Fate, with art worse than the worst you can find in these pictures, are still helming all major operations.

i’ve done some reading on the past on intellectual property and have seen probably the majority of american standard discourse on it. for it is basically stealing is bad, and against has stuff from classical composers composed more than anyone else and treated imitators as praise, to online piracy talking about how it’s free advertising. that was all well and good but it was never quite clear what was real. of course it couldn’t. it’s text on a screen.

it could never have hoped to compare to seeing something physical in front of your space.

animate shibuya, fate 3/4

fitting right along into this story is anime’s actual presence in japan: it’s not that big. the pictures i’ve taken are largely exceptions. that anime girls aren’t everywhere could be because the japanese are traditional and demure and don’t want to be plastering cartoon titties everywhere could be a reason, but it’s not necessary. a much more concrete explanation is that it doesn’t have that much economic value.

the customer base for anime proper, the 12×24 minute episodes, ranges in the thousands.
as in, 1,000~9,000. not 10,000, not 10,000,000. 1,000.

if you can sell more than 10,000 per volume it is basically a nationwide phenomenon.

https://www.animenewsnetwork.com/feature/2012-03-05

anime is not big. it’s a small piece of life. Shibuya is a fairly popular shopping center. Animate Shibuya is… in the back. i was expecting it to have its own building, but it’s just some floor. the next place has a fancier sign out front and some decorations, but it’s like 3 floors down in the basement. and that’s it for anime in the area. in the grander scheme, it’s just not that important. perhaps Akihabara is special because it’s one place where it’s large enough to take over an entire street. but even in Akihabara it’s the same as it is here: a bunch of ever smaller groups making ever smaller things.

what i saw in japan was a different model of the world. convenience stores, road signs, building widths, parking lots, toilets, construction cranes, demolishers in nooks and crannies, anime, demolishers painted with anime in nooks and crannies…

it was a world where the parts worked together.

Prisma Ilya, the popular spinoff mentioned earlier, doesn’t appear in any of these pictures. one possible reason is it’s basically lolicon. perhaps that’s important to this store, but it’s not important in the broader sense – it got a full-length film in public theaters. if you look at old articles about the TPP, you’ll find japanese arguing “the definition of pornography in the legislation is vague and poses a threat to Japan’s pop culture.”

which basically means: what’s real comes first, and what’s on the book comes second.

and what’s real?

this is what’s real. people doing their part to bring beauty into the world is what’s real.

animate shibuya, fate 4/4

i think i’m done with my tome of economics now. is it economics? i don’t think very highly of what “economics” commonly refers to, but at least in etymology it seems like that’d be the name. i didn’t come to japan intending to think about such things, only about trains and land. i didn’t upload these pictures expecting to comment on them either. i thought i had talked about the big things i wanted to talk about in the main post. but the total number of words here now easily exceeds the “main post”. maybe these things were important to me after all. i do think it’s downstream of the stuff over there though. i don’t think these things are a matter of having the right law or the right number of dollars or the right amount of land or whatever. i think it’s a matter of aesthetics. but i’m done now. i’ll stick to just comments.

well. maybe. i’m definitely done with economics though, or whatever it was.

i didn’t think this while standing here taking this picture, but i think i better understand the idea of “supporting creators”. it’s a phrase used on an american site called patreon, which many flock to because it’s the only obvious way to monetize things available. they don’t have a local store with “As Seen On YouTube”, or a “As Seen On Deviantart”. i didn’t connect the dots before. i thought it, or Gumroad or Redbubble or wherever it is streamers and artists and whoever sell stuff, was a matter of whether they were offering something worth the price. “supporting creators” was a really odd way to phrase it.

now i see the problem. i was buying chicken nuggets.

the problem is they’re “content creators” selling “merch”.

the problem is the commodification – that is to say – universalization of everything.

Electone Super Live

Kyoto Station, Grand Ampitheatre

 

this exists solely because facebook seems to default to the final image of a post for its preview image. apparently you can control it by setting a html meta property, but that's not allowed in free wordpress. what is allowed though is putting down images in html and then setting them to not show up. so this technically is the last image - as far as facebook is concerned.

Beautiful World [A Trip to Japan]

Yasukuni Shrine

Tokyo, Yasukuni Shrine

> What was the original objective?
> Where did I go?
> What did I find in Japan?
> What did I find having traveled?
–> What is the value in travel?
–> Planning and Decisions
–> Where can information be found?
–> What does having information mean?
> References and Other Rulesets


What was the original objective?

The main thing I wanted to see was how the Japanese use their land. I’ve heard and seen a lot of things about Japanese zoning, public transportation, and how everything was walkable and human-scaled, and that’s what I wanted to see for myself.

Other than that, what I wanted changed wildly as planning progressed.

The original suggestion was to go on a bus tour. I outright rejected this idea. Bus tour? In Japan? Why not stop only in expat enclaves while we’re at it?

I’ve never had a good experience with group guided tours. Granted, all (2) of them have been Chinese bus tours in America, but even theoretically removing all the Chinese and American parts I don’t like the idea of being corralled into certain timeframes on someone else’s schedule. What if I like this place more than that other place less? What if I don’t care about shopping for hours on end at globalized fashion chains so you can get your commission money because the type of people that would sign up for such tours are mentally lazy and financially stupid? What if I don’t want to have “how many minutes did someone else say I have left again” lurking in the back of my head? Which I don’t. I’ve had 12 years of that already thank you. I think 20% of my life expectancy is enough of that.

Tourist attractions are not specifically interesting, i.e., “a lot of people have been here and want to come here” is not a good reason to care, but everything is even more uninteresting if I don’t expend mental energy to obtain it. As far as I’m concerned, Times Square is a place on on a bus. Times Square is not a place in New York, or, if it is, New York isn’t a place in reality. Guided tours are like dreams – after unending nothing, that is to say, going past places you don’t spend a moment thinking about, places you have heard of will magically and suddenly appear in front of you. Then it will disappear, for another indeterminate length of time lots of nothing will happen again, and then another thing will appear. Rinse and repeat. It will not have value when it appears, it will not have value when it goes away; the only difference is someone else stopped the passage of space for a few minutes so you can take some pictures.

I wanted Japan to feel real.

So planning it myself it was. Well, myself and my sister. My mom would be travelling with us too, but she had little input on planning, outside of some travel agent she regularly used to book tickets and hotels, and saying how long she was willing to go. Which was important.

Time was the greatest limiter – or rather, the greatest organizer. We started off with a self-guided tour template of 1 week, suggesting Tokyo, Hakone, and Kyoto. The plane tickets we had went the opposite direction, but in any case, Hakone was fairly quickly cut out, as there was only one or two things theoretically interesting in Hakone, and the big one – a traditional inn and various traditional things – seemed rather expensive. Things were first blocked out in 2~4 hour chunks with ideas from tourism sites. At some point after deciding on hotels, we detailed it further, adding more major and minor places, finding what bus numbers or train lines and transfers would be taken between points (and tallying up their fares), getting a list of potential places to eat we were certain had english menus, and eventually, discovering Google has something currently called MyMaps (probably because Maps and Earth are now integrated), specified the exact routes to walk the whole way, planned down to the minute. It was no longer “Kyoto” and “Tokyo”, but “these specific places in this specific order in this specific route in Kyoto and Tokyo”.

The number of places I wanted to specifically go were not many. Honnoji was conveniently placed so I wanted to go there for the memes. Akihabara because I’m a weeb. Other than that, it was more important that I saw at least one item of each type: big train station, varied land usage, walking around places places that were popular for non-tourist (i.e. local economic) reasons… I think that was it. If the trip length was longer and I was alone I’d probably spend most of my time in those, maybe some no-name cities and villages, but since I wasn’t, I settled for a small potential set of suburb-y places and routes close to Kyoto, taking the same importance in the schedule as the big-name attractions.

That was the original idea.


Where did I go?

I planned for a lot, but got to probably less than half of it.

As sorted by names of major places. Days 1-3 in Kyoto, 4-6 in Tokyo; 2018 Nov 16 ~ 22.

1 Honnoji
Nishiki Market
Potoncho Area
(nothing)
2 Potoncho Area
Keage Incline
Eikando
Gion/Higashiyama
Tadasu no Mori
Nijo Castle
Arashiyama
Randen Rail
Potoncho (ltd)
Keage Incline
Gion/Higashiyama
Yasaka
Honnoji
Nishiki Market
3 Nara
Kyoto Station
Fushimi-Inari
Yasaka
Toufukuji
Mukaijima
Arashiyama (ltd)
Randen Rail (ltd)
Fushimi-Inari
Kyoto Station (ltd)
4 Shinkansen
Asakusa
Akihabara
Tokyo Tower
Shinkansen
Asakusa
Akihabara (ltd)
5 Kyu-Furukawa
Rikugien
Ichigaya
Yasukuni
Imperial Gardens
Tokyo Station
Odaiba
Akihabara (ltd)
Yasukuni
Imperial Gardens (ltd)
Tokyo Station (ltd)
Odaiba
Tokyo Tower
6 Atago
Tokyo Metropolitan Government Building
Shinjuku Station
Some Cat Cafe
Harajuku/Takeshita
Shibuya
Shibuya (ltd)
Akihabara (ltd)

Planned routes: [1][2][3][4][5][6]
Actual routes: [1][2][3][4][5][6]

There were a few problems executing the plan.

  • The first day was plagued with problems, one being upon landing in Osaka I’d been awake for about 30 hours. The other one was enough to give me what I think people call a breakdown, which I’ll get to later, but it was solved and after a night of sleep everything was okay.
  • About halfway through the second day, my feet started hurting. Near the start of the third day, they started killing me. The other three days were the same way: about one hour of alright walking, then death. This pain was probably also a big factor in the significant decrease in the number of pictures I took. In total I took 1728. Of those, 656 were taken after the third day – 38% of the total, or, 68% less than the other half (technically more, since the first day didn’t start until noon, and that was before landing. 152 were before reaching the hotel). 68% reduction in interest is probably an accurate number. 68% reduction is probably also accurate about my walking speed.
  • I didn’t plan for eating time.
  • Or shopping time. I think it should be called “browsing” time, because that’s the real problem.
  • Or time to take pictures.
  • Because it bears reiterating: how much my feet were killing me. If you are looking to visit Japan, and are also an overweight American who doesn’t walk as a fact of life, this will probably be your biggest problem. Forget about saving up money for a trip. Get fit first. Or you’re going to waste a lot of time.

I’ve uploaded 562 of the pictures I took [1][2][3][4][5] including 92 panoramics. I’ve also uploaded 19 videos, including 30 min of Shinkansen through Nagoya.

Other than one image at the top and one at the bottom, they will not be found in this post. This post is not about “travel” in the current standard meaning. I’m not particularly interested in “travel”, it’s merely something that had to be done to achieve the objective.

I don’t have any real “travel” things to say about Japan – except about Gion, which was amazing, and about Odaiba, which was not. I stayed at Kyoto Rich in Kyoto and Mitsui Garden Shiodome in Tokyo. The former felt cheap, but it was cheap, and its location was good. The latter did not feel cheap, was cheap, at its location was similarly central. And the 72-hour Tokyo Subway Ticket (Metro and Toei) was a real moneymaker: put 1500Y in, got 2610Y out. Probably would’ve been more if my feet didn’t hurt. The pictures too were not about “travel”. I have put some comments on them to help illustrate their meaning, which is the important part.

— Having finished now, “comments” is no longer an appropriate description. This was supposed to be the “main post”, but I suppose, just like Japan itself, I spent more length visiting ideas that “don’t matter”. The words in the final album alone are more than what I wrote here. Maybe I’ll put them in their own post one day. For now, they rely on the pictures to convey their premises. It’s related, but probably not the same topic. If you read both, which comes first is probably not important, but it’d be best to leave the final section of this post for last.

This post is (was) the attempt to capture the larger ideas.


What did I find in Japan?

Beauty.

Everywhere.

It is beautiful everywhere.

I had originally dropped into a bunch of places on Google streetview to try and find specific sites that were interesting and pretty, like here’s a shrine or park, look at how it’s surrounded by modern buildings, and planned to walk 137 meters from the station and then turn left. But I didn’t need to follow my planned points and path to see it. It simply presented itself to me. Now, if I wanted to see specific points, then of course I would still need to obey the laws of physics in order to arrive within visual range.

But beauty? In Japan, you don’t need to obey the laws of physics to find beauty.

It was because beauty was everywhere that I was able to make myself put one foot in front of the next to continue moving from point not-hotel to point not-hotel twelve hours a day. It was because beauty was everywhere (and because my feet were killing me) that I forgot to eat (until my feet were killing me enough that I decided that I’d pay to sit down, and paying to sit at certain places just happened to come with complimentary food). It was like magic… except it wasn’t magic, because the materials and designs were obviously human. Man made this. Man made Japan. Specifically, Japanese Man made Japan. Are the Japanese magical beings? I was told that visiting Japan would make me realize that it’s not anime fantasy land. And it’s true – but only about the anime part.

How did they make everything so beautiful?

I have some guesses, a few of which I’ll name, but I don’t think any of them are sufficient – supposing a place fulfills all the requirements I specify to the letter, it’s probably still going to be ugly. It might be pretty to someone else, I suppose. Do you find those european replica towns in China beautiful? Is a zoo is a budget safari? Would you visit a ski slope if it was in a hotel? You can say yes, but I won’t.

A magical place naturally implies a magical cause: it sounds magical, but I think the best answer to say Japan is beautiful because of the Japanese. If some country and Japan switched populations, I imagine it’d start looking like Japan in less than 20 years, and feeling like Japan in less than 2. It at least seems to be plausible. Put Brits in Africa, you get a Britain (Rhodesia). Put Japanese in an American car factory, you get Japanese cars (NUMMI).

But back to Japan. And the longer, more incomplete answers.

The term I’m familiar with is “human scale”. I think this name is the right idea for a label from the American standpoint, but I’m going to be talking back and forth between the denotative “human scale” and the more important thing I feel the phrase stands for.

Japan isn’t beautiful because it’s “both traditional and modern”, it’s beautiful because everything is in its proper size and place. Things aren’t big or new or whatever just because they can be, they are whatever size and form serves their purpose. This takes any number of forms, the most famous of which is that traditional-and-modern thing, the slightly less famous being narrow buildings and narrow streets. But it’s everywhere.

“Convenience store” in America means “the thing next to the gas station that sells “edible” industrial waste”. In Japan I felt they were competing with Walmart Supercenters in variety, with Starbucks in frequency, and… I don’t think there’s an equivalent concept in America for their slot in quality. There were a lot of things they sold for next to a dollar / ~100Y, but to say Lawson or FamilyMart are part “dollar store” would be a grave insult. They served a variety of needs at a convenient price and place. They slotted in where they could; a Lawson here could be twice as large as the Lawson there. And this concept just fractally repeats all the way up and all the way down.

In Kyoto I saw a number of buildings that had bridges across little creeks. Creeks whose width was maybe one american car length. And these bridges were super simple. They weren’t some over-engineered “This passes Safety and Environmental standards and was made by an Equal-Opportunity company that Supports Womens Rights” thing. It was “My property can only be accessed by crossing this creek. So I need a bridge. To cross this creek”. I’m pretty sure more than a few of those bridges would not survive a car load in an earthquake, but who cares? And so bridges appeared. One of the things I ended up taking a lot of pictures of were parking lots. I hate cars, and I hate parking lots, but I had to appreciate how even parking lots had their place: Is your empty spot big enough for two cars? Put a sign with a light on it and lay down those contraptions, you’re open for business. Is it not big enough for two cars? Put a vending machine on it. Is it bigger than two cars? Construction will be here tomorrow to make something, if not a shop or other business, then a manned parking lot, or a parking tower.

Just to give some idea on sizes, here are the numbers I was able to measure. I probably should’ve measured more, but like with the pictures, these were dependent on what I found different enough to notice at the time, and by the fact it was a handheld tape measure (and by the pain in my feet).

6″ – steps height (probably in Kiyomizu-Gojo station)
8′ – ceiling (probably also in Kiyomizu-Gojo station)
6’6″ – ceiling height low end (?)
31.5″ – door width (probably hotel room)
73.5″ – door height

100″ – bridge single lane width (across the river from Kiyomizu-Gojo station)
218″ – double lane street width (across the river from Kiyomizu-Gojo station)
34″ – handrail height (probably the barriers on the street west of Shijo bridge)
15.5″ – vehicle limiter (i don’t know the proper names for these: they’re the interlaced barriers that indicate only pedestrians are allowed. this was at Potoncho Park. the measurement is the width between barriers.)
46″ – bridge guardrail height (probably Sanjo)
7″ – old step height (leading away from Keage incline)
5’4″ – hello kitty store entrance covers (Higashiyama)

46.5″ – pedestrian path width on a bridge (next to Toufukiji station)
7.75″ – new step height (unnamed park on Kamo River)
5’3″ – bottom of train rings height (the things you hold onto)
7′ – small inari gates inner height (at Fushimi-Inari)

21.5″ – shinkansen legroom (this measurement is from the edge of my seat at seat level to the back of the seat in front at the same level. it is not the same number as the number you see on airlines, which measures the distance between the same points on two chairs.)
7′ – metro-shimbashi station ceiling height

5′ – imperial palace wall, single block height

9.75″ – step length (no idea)
7′ – tunnel height (no idea)

81″x48″ – bed size (the length at the first hotel was shorter)

Next to everything was human sized.

I remember hearing some complaint once about how portion sizes for Japanese food are small. I didn’t feel this way (but I also don’t get Big Gulps). Granted, I ate mostly like a commoner, but given commoner food, I felt it was too large for a meal when I did ask for bigger portions. I ate slightly more expensive than commoner twice, once for something like 2200 and the other for… 2800? And it was like they stopped adding volume at the correct point and then just changed out the remaining cost for better materials. Which seems like the right approach. You can’t eat more than a certain amount anyways (Japan does have buffets, but all prices come with time limits). My favorite meals were about 100 – convenience store onigiris, rice balls wrapped in seaweed with a few flavory goodies inside. They fit in the palm of my hand. Turns out that’s about how much I need to not feel hungry. And I’m an overweight American, so it’s probably a meal for a human at a proper size.

The few things in Japan I didn’t like were all because they were improperly sized.

– There’s a stretch of about 300 meters between the Hijiri and Shohei bridges, north of the Kanda river and east of JR-Akihabara Station, that I felt bad walking up.

I think it’s because it’s a single row of short and narrow not particularly impressive buildings, on a road with a narrower than average sidewalk (and fairly wide bushes), backdropped/shadowed by a wide skyscraper.

– The entirety of Odaiba.

The whole place felt like it was designed by an American. Wide roads, giant parking lots, and the only streets in Japan I found trash on.

I had gotten off at the Fune-no-Kagakukan stop for the Sora Yori memes, then after seeing the ship walked to Diver City. That first ~200m walk was terrible. Nothing but a wall of bush on my right, and a road and elevated busway on my left (Yurikamome is not a train). It had its separated pedestrian and cycleways, but I didn’t care. No one was there, and nothing was interesting. Still better than a walk in American suburbia, but that’s not a very high standard. Then I crossed the street and walked another ~550m, most of it next to a parking lot. A giant, American-sized parking lot. That I couldn’t cut through because they were walled because free parking doesn’t exist in Japan. Which is fine enough I suppose, it’s not like it would’ve been better if I could.

Diver City was just a mall. Like, an American mall. The spacings and everything. The arcade level was not worth coming here instead of Akihabara (unless you choose a hotel here, which I don’t recommend), though it was interesting seeing random candy bars and food in UFO machines I suppose. There’s a giant Gundam outside and a level of the building just for gundam inside, but I don’t particularly care for gundams. Other than that it’s a mall. Clothes and more clothes everywhere. Maybe it’s good clothes? Even if I was interested in clothes, I can’t imagine I’d do it here.

The one good thing here was the karaage. I didn’t know it was possible that fried chicken could be fit for human consumption, but there go the Japanese, proving me wrong again, by turning every conceivable thing into a delicacy.

Except, apparently, Odaiba. This place sucks. Skyscrapers and landscrapers and trash on wide empty streets: everything you could possibly want to piss a pedestrian off. It really is as if it was designed by an American. There’s even a replica Statue of Liberty.

God bless America. I mean, Odaiba.

– Arashiyama. But this one’s probably fixable by not going there early Sunday afternoon.

“Crowded” means different things to different people, two common ones are lack of personal space and people getting in pictures. I didn’t mind these so I thought crowding was alright, but it turns out it isn’t – depending on what the place is. It’s a matter of having the appropriate people density. Higashiyama being crowded was fine. Arashiyama’s bridge being crowded, not so much. The Grand Staircase at Kyoto Station felt a lot more comfortable during the best thing I’ve seen in a very long time, than the same place the next morning before anyone had woken up. Taking Tokyo trains during off hours was alright, but seeing how many people can really fit into a single car during the morning rush hour without any particular discomfort? That was beautiful. Not the kind of beautiful you can take a picture of. Not that it’s not allowed; you simply won’t be able to do it.

– Kansai and Narita airports. I mean, they’re not the worst (hi Houston). Given that even the Japanese don’t have likable airports, it could be that it’s just impossible to make such things. But, for sake of completeness, I mention that here. You do need to follow the laws of physics to at least escape the airport before you can find beauty.

Everything else was properly sized. And because everything was properly sized, everything could be integrated and arranged into a social order.

Order: that was my feeling in Japan.

Beauty is order, order beauty, that is all I know on this earth, and all I need to know.

Most things (outside of the anime girls) weren’t particularly pretty. But they didn’t have to be. Most were probably ugly things if looked at alone, but they fit in with everything else, at their proper size, with proper boundaries – if I had to tally up all my pictures by type, gates would rank at the top – and the rest was taken care of… by everyone and everything else doing the same thing. Almost none of it was done for artistic reasons, too, There were some potted plants and a shrine here and the very occasional anime girl there, but most of it was just economic (i.e. making money) usage of space. An advertisement. A restaurant menu. A door. A vending machine. A coin locker. A parked bike. A parked car. I think it’s appropriate to call this beautiful in the usual sense of the word, but also because I think it’s a beautiful sounding word to apply to the concept that english doesn’t have a word for, the opposite of “boring” (“interesting” has been compromised), which is almost always the real problem with “ugly” buildings. I don’t think I ever saw anything one would normally call “art” on any building. I did see anime girls, but they were there because they were advertisements in Akihabara, not because it was an art piece. Not because the building was too big and they needed to put something else on it to make it less ugly. Buildings were just the size they needed to be.

Granted, I didn’t go into any skyscraper districts. But if you aren’t up to speed yet: Japan isn’t made of skyscraper districts. It’s not “overpopulated” or “hyperdense”. It’s pretty easy, or maybe more accurately, you have to put some effort in to get specifically to the skyscraper districts or other boring places. I think Akihabara has quite a few buildings that would classify as skyscrapers, but I never noticed such a fact while I was walking around in it. There was simply an endless variety of shapes and sizes everywhere I could possibly imagine to look – both in weeb heaven land, and (nearly) everywhere else.

I wonder if order is the way to build a beautiful city. It at least seems to be the case.

I find Las Vegas and Dubai ugly. Places like these are terrible because there’s only one strip where all the interest is, it’s all at the wrong size and frequency, and the moment you step out of that it’s a wasteland. I don’t care how fancy your light shows are, I don’t care about five stars this or millions of people have been to that, give me some lively streets with real people where I can wander around – again for the slow: that means on foot – stop at any time, any random place, and still be able to see nice things, and maybe, even get nice food. All the interesting non-point places I’ve found in Japan are also strips: Nishiki Market, Akihabara, etc. Suppose none of these compare, and Vegas or Dubai are better. The problem is, around Vegas and Dubai, are… Vegas and Dubai.

Around Nishiki is Kyoto, and around Akihabara is Tokyo.

It’s like buying a home. You’re not buying “a” ‘house’: you’re buying the neighborhood, you’re buying the city, you’re buying the local politics and economy. Now, given that, is it more important that beauty is on your house? Or is it more important beauty is on all that other stuff? Model it as a woman: big tits, or manages everything about home life well?

In America, it’s the former.

Americans have some pretty funny ideas, which I’ve ranted on at length before so I don’t intend to retread everything, but I’ll note a few things just to provide contrast.

Using the big keywords I’ve said here it’s very easy to journalist your way into a negative summary of Japan fitting into existing American ideas. If there’s parking lots everywhere and everything takes every possible open space at every size, then it must be extremely crowded, we’re America we have a lot of space, we don’t need to do that. If everyone follows everyone else and makes buildings that are somewhat boring and don’t stick out too much, then it must be because everyone is a drone, we’re America land of the free, we’re individuals we won’t do that. And so on and so on. I will respond to just these two, and indicate a pattern between them. I will also suggest that this pattern is the American mindset, and a countering pattern that appears to me to be the mindset of the Japanese.

“Japan is small and America has a lot of space.”

“[A]s if all the acreage in, say, Wyoming makes an ounce of a difference to people trying to live and work in, say, Boston. Or for that matter, all the acreage in WESTERN MASS vis-a-vis the people trying to live and work in Boston.”

That America the nation-state has political boundaries that are large is utterly inconsequential to land usage of cities. There’s a joke around political circles that Russia is a gas station masquerading as a country. This is alluding to the idea that outside of St. Petersburg and Moscow, Russia is a big country with next to no one in it. It’s a true idea. It’s also true of every country on the planet except for Singapore, the Vatican, Monaco, Lichtenstein, depending on your definitions Macau and Hong Kong, and a few other city-states I might have forgotten about. Think about any “crowded” country in your mind, go look at it on google maps, you have free satellite view of anywhere on the planet (did I mention it’s free?), no excuses (if you haven’t looked around Las Vegas or Dubai before, now would be the time to do that too). You’ll find there’s a lot of space everywhere, and most cities aren’t that crowded outside of a small area. India, it’s a whole lot of farmland. Bangladesh, same thing. China, China doesn’t even exist outside its eastern plain. And what is America? America is Los Angeles, San Francisco, Seattle, Chicago, Boston, New York, Washington, Miami, Atlanta, and Houston. Add or change the list if you like. That’s 10 items. Suppose I was wrong by half there’s 20. 20 cities. Over a lot of space. You know what that makes America?

That’s right: A corncob stand masquerading as a country.

If we’re looking at just the cities, everything is too large. American highways are too large. American suburbs are too large. American houses are too large. Big Gulps are too large. Everything is too large – or nonexistent, because it’s “go big or go home”, and “or” means both. So we get 1) really big things, and 2) nothing. Strip malls, parking lots, skyscrapers. Endless fields of single-family homes. Nothing larger, nothing smaller. Everyone has to get in their car to go to the Supercenter. No, that’s not entirely correct: they go to the parking lot at the Supercenter. Not a Japanese parking lot. An American parking lot. From one vast desert to the next.

Japanese cities are interesting from large scale to small. In Japanese art, anime, and movies, they straight up lift scenes and places from real life Japan. And why not? This also explains how this place churns out so much good art. The modernists on staring into blank pages being inspirational were wrong; you need to have seen something to draw it. So if you’re constantly surrounded in beauty, it’s going to be much easier to create it. Or just copy. And why not?

American cities are the interior of one car and the rear end of the next.

That’s what’s shown and that’s what’s remembered, because that’s more real and more beautiful than what is actually out there.

The other argument is that “America is sparsely populated”. Which in context of the other one makes it hard to keep a straight face. I understand why these lines are said: it’s status signalling. Americans all learned in elementary school the narrative of Manifest Destiny: America the Beautiful for Spacious Skies something Amber Waves of Grain or other. Which is fine and all, if you realize that’s what you’re doing. But those ideas are why America is actually for Spacious Cars and Black Plains of Boring, why your commute is 90-120 minutes a day one way, and why it’s not even constantly moving at any predictable speed: First, build big and far apart because there’s a lot of space. Second, say any suggested improvements can’t work because everything is too spread out. Then, say things don’t have to be close together because there’s a lot of space…

Ideas have consequences. If you think Las Vegas / Dubai is the correct model, one where people go from oasis (home) to desert (everything else) to oasis (supercenter), that’s fine.

I don’t think anyone who’s thought it through actually agrees with that.

“Japanese are mindless collectivists and Americans are innovative individualists.”

One of the big narratives about Japan is it’s always pushing the state-of-the-art on automation.

This was one that I found to be completely wrong. Beyond a doubt. Whether Japanese universities and companies at the top when sorted by automation is completely inconsequential. I’m commenting on daily life and culture as I was able to see it on the streets, and my thrust is we know for sure that’s the real Japan, and whatever things up in the clouds they’re doing, it’s based on and a result of the stuff right in front of us. People have a tendency to map what they know onto what they don’t know, they hear Japan makes the highest tech, that must mean the rest of it is also higher-tech, and this isn’t helped by journalists or their imitators. “Japan is super automated” in the American understanding is not just false, but wrong, actively wrong, like you have to make up shit and enthusiastically remove what’s in front of your face in order for the image to be true.

Rather than pushing automation, what I saw suggested Japan actively attempts to stick a person into every possible place where there might be public conflict. So many that it’s as if they only stopped sticking more people in places because they couldn’t find more people.

I was in Akihabara and noticed there were four cops standing around, hmm wonder what they’re doing, but wasn’t particularly interested so I was going to walk past – but then they stopped me. And everyone else. All four of them got in some formation.

Then a car appears out of nowhere, disappears onto the street. They all say something, bow, step aside, and pedestrian traffic resumed.

I should’ve went into the store and bought something right there. That was a show.

It was the entrance to a parking lot in the middle of a big building, Yodobaishi Camera (sells discount electronics). Maybe those four had some other purpose too but their main job, as far as I could tell, was just to prevent people from getting hit. Four men. I’m going to say it again because it was just so amazing to me: Four men. Four men, hired for purpose of making sure no one got hit. That was in the late afternoon so there were a lot more people, but you can drop into google maps and see for yourself what it looks like in the middle of the day. They’re still there. Three rather than four, but still there. Standing at attention.

There’s probably a better way to phrase it than “Japan is designed around paying attention”. Both automation and attention at least in their Japanese and American iterations both could easily be said to represent the other way. In a sense, the pedestrians’ and driver’s collision detection is “automated” by those men. In another sense, if the men were removed, then the parking entrance would be designed around “attention” because if you don’t pay it, you’re screwed. It is my intuition and choice to map the Japanese way onto “attention” and the American way onto “automation”. There is an upper limit on what you can pay attention to, so you have to pick and choose what’s important to you. Detailed in obverse: what do you want other people to pay attention to with regards to you?

A matter of what decisions are important: Do you want drivers to have to stop and wait for an indeterminate period of time before they can enter/exit your building, and pedestrians to watch out so they don’t get maimed? Or do you want to put uniformed people there to take care of that decision they don’t care for, for them, and bow after their task is complete?

I can tell you I wouldn’t have applauded for a convex mirror.

Not that there weren’t any convex mirrors. There were. And those too were in much higher frequency than I expected. Mirrors, signs, attendants, so many things were everywhere for the purpose of ensuring quick and clean expected results for the public in such excessive amounts I was beginning to suspect the Japanese Department of Transportation must be the most powerful arm of the government. Then I noticed another extension: convenience stores. Can you imagine one of those giant waist-sized copy machines? In a convenience store? Well they had it. Unmanned. Right next to the porn mags and microwavable meals. Which they will ask you if you want it microwaved for you. They had that right there too.

And everywhere I looked the principle continued. I haven’t seen the Energizer bunny in twenty years, and now I know where he went. He’s here. Running Japan.

Even the famous meal ticket machines struck me in the same way. After seeing a few, it was obvious its primary purpose was a matter of removing potential money conflicts. The cook/waiter doesn’t need to handle the money, only the meal. And if money can neither be swiped by the employee nor argued with by the customer, then you don’t need a manager on site – or if there is one, his meaning is different.

The American idea of automation, on the other hand, is specifically about reducing the number of people. Nevermind whether the public is satisfied with it, just reduce the number of people. The current popular example is self-checkout machines. No one likes them. No one. You are going to get “Unexpected item in the bagging area. Please remove item”, and you are going to stand and wait for the single employee assigned there to get to you, after he gets through the other five machines having the same problem. But it’s good, because it’s automated. Self-driving cars are killing people, and we’re “debating ethics” like “should a car kill pedestrians or its passengers”, rather than suing the company, or banning the technology, or reducing their maximum speed, or hitting the brakes. Or going back to drivers. It’s good, because it’s automated. The real problem is that the technology is just a little imperfect today. This is the future. This is the march towards enlightenment.

The reason why I map the American way onto “automation” is because I doubt Americans think. Thinking itself is treated as a sin. Americans mechanically seek automation because they mentally seek the reduction of syllogisms to points. Preferably, to a single objective point: one True narrative to rule to them all. Are the Japanese “collectivist”? Perhaps. But if I were to choose either Americans or the Japanese to call “automatons”, the Japanese would not be it.

In writing this I had to stop for two days because a neighbor’s dog was yelping at a rate of about once a second for a length of six hours and driving me insane. When I try to talk to them, they pretend they’re not home. When I talk to the police, they tell me a complaint is not real until I get five neighboring homeowner signatures. When I talk to my family, they tell me people have a right to raise dogs. These answers – don’t change the fact that there’s sound pollution emanating from that dog, and it’s been happening for the past five years. When I look at what others have said about similar situations, people have responded from “just live with it”, to “throw poisoned meat over the fence”, to “send endless legal paperwork at them”, to “spend tens of thousands of dollars to soundproof your room”, to “buy super bright lights and a big amplifier and send it right back at em”.

In short, they said: “You go do something about it”.

Or as I phrased it last time: “Fuck you, got mine”.

I even read one comment saying something like this was a good thing:

“I’m surrounded by neighbors with barking dogs and the sound of gunshots. I’ve never been a big fan of the wanna-be dictators that live in cities so it actually brings pleasure to my ears to hear the report of liberty ringing through the woods and my fellow freedom loving country dwellers don’t mind it either.”

Maybe I didn’t go into the Japanese countryside enough, but it was quiet. That stereotype was on the money. Everywhere I went was quiet. People were quiet. Cars were quiet. Toilets flushing were quiet. Even those hot air driers you stick your hands in were quiet. The loudest things were trains (if you weren’t inside them) (correction: arcades were the loudest), but both rails and highways had sound walls on them. Anywhere they were close to housing, soundwalls. Miles and miles and miles of soundwalls and more soundwalls. It is difficult to imagine a Japanese neighborhood ever having a noise problem, first because probably no one makes much noise to begin with, and if they did, they’d be cooperative and come to some agreement, and if they weren’t, the cops would come and help work something out. “Help” not being sarcastic. Cops are everywhere in Japan, by the way. And these aren’t American cops. There’s no equivalent American concept for them. I would maybe compare them to class leaders, but that only makes sense if you’re a weeb; class leader also has no equivalent American concept. I would also maybe compare them to having a big brother, but “Big Brother” also has absolutely nothing to do with how Japanese police integrate into their social fabric. I would know. I saw people casually walk up to talk to Japanese cops. And Japanese cops casually walked up to talk to me. (That story is in the panoramics.)

The Japanese actually have a social fabric. That doesn’t exist in America, because regardless of how many “community center”s you build, everyone’s attitude is “fuck you, got mine”. No matter what kinds of things I or the police can do about that neighbor’s dog, it’s their dog. That’s not a statement of legal rights, that’s a statement of ontology. A court order means nothing if that person doesn’t care to do it. The law doesn’t protect people, people protect the law. The Japanese people protect the law. The American people say “fuck you, got mine”.

Ideas have consequences. Everyone knows America makes crap cars, and that’s because everyone making those cars only pays attention to their own little bubble and exercises whatever arbitrary authority over others the piece of paper says they have, fuck if there’s consequences, “fuck you, got mine”. Change the approach, change the consequences.

Earlier I talked about a Japanese car factory in America – it was new Toyota management over what a recently closed GM plant manned by, as the union phrased it, “the worst workforce in the automobile industry”. The day it re-opened, the world’s best cars were coming down the line. And it wasn’t because of some fancy automation. Take it from the workers themselves. Turns out you need people to make cars, and human relationship structures are also a technology. One of the things they did was instantly reduce total man-hours to produce a car by half. They achieved this because Japanese managers decided the line will be stopped any time anyone – any line worker – thinks there’s a problem. Turns out stopping the line for something minor when it appears is cheaper than finding out after the fact and having to undo, and then redo, everything that’s piled on top later.

Just like how it’s cheaper for a neighborhood for an owner to pay attention and train their dog than a neighbor buy soundproofing materials, or big speakers and bright lights. “You can’t say that, that’s their dog!” Yes. It is their dog. That’s the point.

Japanese pay attention to their place in the social fabric to achieve desired consequences.
Americans talk about freedom and innovation.

Japanese make cars people want.
Americans talk about how scrappy tinkerers in Stanford garages made DARPA self-driving cars.

People tour Japanese tourist attractions, cities, suburbs, and charming rural villages.

People tour American tourist attractions, not the cities, definitely not the suburbs, and not rural villages, not because they’re not charming, but because they don’t exist.

Ideas have consequences. Change the approach, change the consequences.

Perhaps the overarching idea is manners.

There was a lot of manners everywhere. The most obvious ones being bowing and uniforms, some less obvious ones being quietness and a certain simplicity and cleanliness in dress, and not obvious at all if you don’t understand the language, how many politeness suffixes there are on every word public attendants say. Somewhere along the way occurred to me it wasn’t a coincidence that Japan is both a land of politeness and a land of proper and beautiful walls and gates. Walls and gates… are just the building versions of manners. Or more illustriously:

Manners are just the human behavior version of walls and gates.

When you encounter a building or a person, you basically have no idea what’s going on inside it. If that building is properly defined though, with a slight bit of flourish on its entrance, you’ll feel it’s slightly more important – because it shows it understands its borders with its neighbors, and that it treats the people who enter it with respect. If a person is properly defined, with a slight bit of flourish where it’s important, say, a clean blue suit, with white-gloved hands, then you’re more likely to go to such a stranger to ask for help, and, finishing with a bow, feel slightly better going off about your day.

Whatever is going on inside your house or your head, how you present is how others will treat you and interact with you. How you present yourself is what your “manners” are.

A lot of American political activism, downstream of which is the general culture, has the central idea of “Don’t judge me by my looks”. Well what else are you giving people to judge you on? They’re not going to read your book. “You can’t judge me” Sure I can. I have to know how to interact with you. “You don’t know anything about me” I know at least that your gate is ugly and your walls are crumbling. There’s certain types of things I can reasonably be sure are true from those facts, just as sure as I can be that a tree fallen in a forest at some point made a sound. “I’m trying to raise awareness” Yeah. You’re doing that alright.

“I do what I want!”

Does such an idea lead to a better world? Ideas have consequences.

The American phrasing for Japanese dress code is “conservative”, and in terms of the physical references, it’s pretty accurate. In Tokyo it was more or less a sea of black suits. In Kyoto there were quite a number of kimonos instead. But “conservative” (in Americanese) more generally means “old fashioned”, as in “done because it’s always been done this way”, and I’m not sure that’s so true. It may be true at the individual scale, like parents telling kids what to do, but I doubt that’s what’s happening on a broader scale. I don’t think it’s the general principle. It does not seem to be possible to build and maintain society so beautiful and so clean and so peaceful with just the idea, “because it’s always been done this way”.

Proper manners have an importance for the person doing it. The act of performing a ritual reinforces its mental importance. I once had, and this is not normal, a co-worker who made sure to say “good morning”, every day, to everyone, the first time he saw them that day. I didn’t understand it then, even when reciprocating the gesture, even when he left and it didn’t happen anymore. I lacked (the ability to construct) a frame of reference on what a world built on that principle would mean. But now I have an idea. “In Japan not saying grace before eating something is considered the absolute pits of rudeness and sure sign of retarded manners.” It’s technically not ‘grace’ because it’s not the Christian God, it’s saying thanks to the people who worked to prepare the food. But technically, that’s as unheard as praying to a god, because most of the people who prepared that food aren’t around, and actually no one is around if you’re eating alone and the waiter has left the table. Yet it happens. Not because of materialism vs spiritualism, but because the act of doing it reinforces its mental importance.

What would it mean if everyone and everyones’ behaviors had proper boundaries? What would it mean if everyone’s interactions with each other were properly defined? What would it mean if people paid attention to others, and saw that everyone has their share in shaping what the world will look like?

What would such a world look like?

Japan gave me some ideas.

No, that’s not accurate.

A week in Japan induced me to ask, “What would such a world look like?”.


What did I find having travelled?

What is the value in travel?

I believe it is to adjust your senses.

I consider this the first real time I’ve been to another place. In all the other times, it was basically a dream. I had no say in anything, and nothing affected me. The only decisions available were to follow or not follow the tour group (whether this be a Chinese bus tour or family), to get on or not get on the vehicle in time, and to wake up or not wake up on time. In travel as well as other domains, I’ve found where you make decisions is where you pay attention is what becomes important is what you remember. This time, it was somewhere I wanted to go. Nevermind that “it’s the land of trains and anime!!!” isn’t a very good reason, it’s my reason, which means it’s better than someone else’s reason. That’s how decisions work. So I wanted to make all the decisions I could come up with.

At the beginning I said my interest was “how the Japanese use their land”, but what I really wanted to see was how they live. To fully see how another people live is probably an impossible task, though you can presumably get pretty close by speaking their language and working in their economy for a few decades. Short of such an intensive and extensive ethnography, I was content to wander about the places just slightly more mundane than specifically designed tourist attractions. I have a few opinions on the tourist attractions, which I list in the albums, but most of them were not particularly here nor there.

In the end, the parts of Japan I enjoyed the most were watching people do things and inspecting places designed for more reasons than just mine. How do these foreign people live their daily lives? Well, here’s at least how they live some of their public parts of it.

Planning and Decisions

The most important purpose the tourist attractions served was anchoring during the planning phase – which turned out to be fairly different from what I imagined before I did it, and doing it showed me why it is travel agents and tour guides exist. That stuff takes time. A lot of time. I can understand why some people don’t want to do it (though I think it also entirely defeats the purpose of travel). There were some decisions too, though not so much on decisions between tourist attractions. It’s comparing this (web)page to that (web)page: hard enough telling which part is better even with detailed specsheets, telling worthiness of tourist attractions based off of fuzzy language written by people you don’t know is intractable. Hiring people who have (ostensibly) been to places – tour guides and travel agents – would have a much better idea. (No surprise, those types are the ones writing these (web)pages.) Taking it a step further, such people would have been much more important before the internet. In such times, where else would you get a map? How would you read the signs? I imagine if I had unlimited money and power, a personal travel guide would be ideal. Someone who knows all the stuff, but is at my beck and call rather than the other way around.

The other decision was only slightly less intractable: how much resolution should the planning have? “Kyoto then Tokyo” was obviously not good enough, but where should the detail stop? I imagine this one isn’t as difficult if you’ve travelled before and have a sense for this sort of thing, but I hadn’t a clue. It might also be something approaching personality: I hate not having any ideas, so I planned things down to the minute and meter – not so much so there was a plan to follow to the letter, but to have a letter to return to in case things go wrong. This cost a lot more time, but I felt better having done it.

When did I stop? When I burned out.

That being said, a lot of planning ended up being next to superfluous. Like looking for restaurants: I was worried about places not having english menus, but this is basically not a concern. They’re fairly common. Some will even indicate it on a sign outside. At first I was using japan-guide.com and similar, but they all listed the super high class exorbitant stuff which I didn’t care for. Then I used tabelog, something the Japanese actually use, but it turns out it’s not particularly important to the Japanese whether a place does or doesn’t have an english menu, so they don’t go and mark that detail on a review site. Then by the time I got there, I magically found myself magically okay with places not having english. I wasn’t a food tourist. I had some plans to be one, but because beauty was everywhere, lines at a lot of places were long, and my feet hurt, I skipped meals or ate at convenience (stores).

This extremely detailed planning, or rather, the expectation of having an extremely detailed plan, ran into two major problems:

  • I didn’t have a specific spot to get a SIM card.
  • “Don’t travel with family”.

These appeared at the same time at the very beginning after something like 16 hours of plane and transfer and 30 hours of being awake, which gave me what I think people called a breakdown.

The former was an oversight based on how exceedingly simple and cheap it was to do in Hong Kong. A little 7-11 or something right at the exit of customs had SIM cards for like 10 USD for 7D unlimited calls/text/data. I was caught by surprise at KIX when mom said “don’t get it here, it’s cheaper in the city”. So I’m like, okay mom. Of course, it wasn’t okay. Because now you don’t know where to go to get a SIM card. They aren’t just lying around on the streets “in the city”. We take the limo bus to Kyoto station, and wander around the south side until we find some convenience-looking stores, one (or two?) of which had english instructions on laminated sheets on their SIM cards for sale. They were something like 4500Y minimum for 30D, 1.5GB data, no calls no text. Which seemed like a bad joke. Then we take a taxi to our hotel, except the taxi didn’t drop us off at the literal doorstep, I don’t have a map because I was expecting to have google the whole time, and neither of them have maps of sufficient size or detail either, so we walk around like headless chickens for an hour until one stranger responded to mom’s asking random people for directions with a google maps search and tells us we had walked in the wrong direction. Turns out the taxi dropped us off about 300m from the hotel, and we had extended that distance by about 200m. Somewhere along those 500m we stop by a FamilyMart, which may or may not have had a SIM card. I say “may or may not” because there were definitely things labelled “phone”, but none of them had instructions were in english – which is pretty important to someone who can only read english (“I know my kana and a few kanji” = “can only read english”). I was delirious at this point, but my sister saved the day by searching up “kyoto sim card” or something on google using the hotel wifi, said we could get it at a BIC Camera next to Kyoto Station, and so that’s where we went and that’s what we got. Or rather, that’s what I got. Apparently neither of them found such a thing was all that important. I was ready to shell out the 4500 at that point, but BIC Camera had the same offering for 2000, so 2000 it was. Looking it up now, apparently KIX has SIM cards for around 4000. In retrospect, I should’ve just paid the 2000 extra and gotten that half a day of time back. 20 USD for a few hours of time and peace of mind? Next you’ll tell me you have a deal for self enlightenment.

(There’s a lot of signs saying “free wifi” everywhere, but I don’t trust such things (in America), one because it’s unreliable reception, two because my main usage would be GPS which means moving around. My sister said she had success with ward/station wifi in Kyoto and Nara, but in every Tokyo attempt they required at least an email, and her yahoo email gave some consistent error message. Free wifi on the limo bus also required some similar details. On the same topic: the SIM card asked for passport details.)

“Don’t travel with family” I’ve heard now and again, so it seems to be some sort of idiom. Having done it now I have some ideas as to why it is. It doesn’t have to be true, but some things will make it more true than not. I think it comes down again to decisions, but since I’ve been talking about decisions a lot already I’ll use a slightly different angle.

The problem with travelling with family is the former is unknown unknowns and the latter is set knowns. Under normal conditions, when this or that happens, this or that person takes care of this or that part. In travel, any number of things can change, most importantly the things you didn’t even consider, and it’s now unclear who can do or who is responsible for what. When mom contradicts me, usually she knows both what I want and what she’s talking about. But generally she only deals with and I only consult her on certain things. SIM card acquirement methods in foreign countries not being one of them. And if it’s on a tight timeline even the decision of whether to stay in this area for a little longer or not can be a strain. Everyone has different interests, and different ways to approach unknowns – how do you deal with those differences in your family? What that dynamic is determines how much you will enjoy what level of travelling with them, or any arbitrary thing with any arbitrary group. Between getting off the limo bus and getting the SIM card four hours later I blamed mom in a variety of colorful ways for preventing us from having a navi, and somewhere in there she said “You could’ve not listened to me”. Which at the time just made my mouth even more colorful. But finally getting sleep after 40 hours of being awake, and then running into coordination problems again that first real day, I decided to do just that afterwards. Our interests didn’t correspond to begin with. She found Gion “boring, when are we going to see the actual stuff” when I found every step I took there much more interesting than the “actual stuff” we later arrived at. She later spent an hour in a Shinjuku cat cafe. I was happily wandering my way from Shinsen to Shibuya doing “nothing”. Does everything need to happen together with family? Is it a magic word? Good fences (and good gates and good manners) make good neighbors; everyone prefers cubicles over open offices; rooms have walls for a reason. I never had trouble with family on all those other trips because I knew who was in charge and I was fully satisfied – or at least, not unsatisfied enough to conceptualize it – being pulled along doing whatever it was the others were doing. This time, that was not the case.

Next time I go somewhere I’m going to print out some maps beforehand. Yes it’s more convenient if everything is on the phone, even more convenient if it’s on the cloud, but I think having a lower level tech backup is good (google does not offer downloadable/offline maps in Japan). Having thought about it beforehand is also a type of backup, and regardless of how superfluous a lot of it turned out, I’m glad I did that: “you fall to the level of your training”. I was able to quickly rearrange the order of things because I didn’t need to look details up again, which would’ve taken longer because mobile is not the same as a desktop. And of course, I had an idea on what places of interest existed. No tourist booklet could have given me ideas on the visual value of what this or that non-tourist area would be.

I think I’d like a lower level backup of everything, but that’s probably not feasible at some point. The lower level of GPS is just asking for directions. Rather than cross-referencing three paper schedules you should just take a taxi, which mom is fond of, but actively exited my considerations. Similarly, there’s an upper limit to how many and what kinds of decisions you can make. Taking a train is more real than taking a taxi, but only in that 1) regular people use trains more than taxis and 2) trains have stations, which in Japan are absolutely charming. The actual ride of a train and taxi have basically the same decision weight.

Unless you take a taxi that drops you off somewhere you didn’t tell it to.

Where can information be found?

Perhaps it’s just me, but it seems like the internet has severely warped my understanding of where things can be found. I thought I had understood the concept with regards to driving and GPS – I look at the map beforehand, and I try to achieve what I visualize in my mind, only consulting the phone if I start doubting the correlation between what I see and that image. It was obvious to me that following a disembodied voice by the nose that only tells you what to do 15 or 30 seconds ahead of time would paint a similarly disintegrated world. But the problem was much bigger than that.

In Kyoto Station there was a visitor information center or some similar name. Mom wanted to go take a look and pick up some brochures and booklets, so I follow her in, but I was thinking: gee, what a fancy and pointless display. It’s not like people are going to come here and then plan their trip.

And then I thought – where else would they put it?

How much sooner could the City of Kyoto and the Japan National Tourism Organization get that information sooner into the hands of those who would be interested, by what methods could they have done it, and in what forms could it possibly take?

Sure it’d be better if you knew beforehand, but that’s not what visitor centers are for. If you’re looking for information beforehand, maybe the Japanese Embassy in your country has something. But you’d still have to travel to the Embassy, which they probably don’t have in your specific city (I don’t know anything about embassies). Other than that, where would it be? Who would spend their time and/or land providing such a service? And it is a service. We refer to searching on the internet as “looking up”, as if the man in the sky himself is handing us an apple – and that’s exactly right. What’s not right is thinking that’s how information works. The Google god hands you an apple, but that’s dependent on what Google will give you, and there are things it won’t, either because it chooses not to, or because it doesn’t have it (or because it’s on page 10 and you don’t look past page 2). You can use japan-guide.com or anywhere else, but their information is also limited. Their scope is not infinite, and the real thing is. An obvious limit: how are these sites funded? They are funded somehow. Perhaps that’s why all the restaurants in the first place I looked were of the exorbitant type?

One of the reasons I told myself I didn’t like American cities is because it’s not clear where anything is. Everything is too spread out, everything’s spread out, if a place doesn’t have one of those hundred-foot-tall towers with a huge logo on it, you won’t know it’s there. And in a sense that’s true. Tokyo was marvelous with sticking huge maps (with english!!) on what seemed like every other street corner (infinite budget: how do you do that for cars?). But it’s still not holy revelation when everything is close together. You still have to find one and walk to it.

There’s always some work/cost involved.

And there’s always the possibility that amount is too high.

This other example is even sillier than the last one: I started with the idea that I could shop around to save money on souvenirs. Now, this wasn’t entirely untrue, but it was false. How much could you possibly save? These sorts of things are usually discussed between the sellers beforehand, and even if the cost was a big difference, you are probably not going to be the one to exploit it. There were differences, but I don’t think I saw any more than 300Y difference for the same >2500Y item in the same district. And if it’s not in the same district, or if the more recent district simply doesn’t have the thing you wanted: are you going to go all the way back to the other one? Is this what you want to be spending your time on? How many days are you here? Oh yeah, remember this is all while your feet hurt.

Related is the concept of a “tourist trap”. At least in Japan, I feel a more appropriate wording is “tourist nest”. Here is an area where you can see what you came to see, buy things you’d expected to buy, and there’s plenty of things in english and people who can speak english. Sure there’s some other district where you can get things for cheaper, or see something interesting that most people don’t see. But there will be less english. And the people there won’t be prepared to handle you. Imagine being randomly placed in an airport with no signs and no maps, no attendants and no telephone booths. With videogames as a metaphor instead: imagine no minimap. In the same sense, it’s like being deployed at an embassy or a(n American) military base. Yeah you’re in another country. But your actions mean very different things when you’re inside versus when you’re out. Or in a much darker sense, human trafficking. You’re in a foreign country, but no one knows you, you can’t communicate with anyone, and you have no papers. After escaping, finding your way to the nearest “tourist trap” is probably your best bet. But how will you know where that is? In a much more mundane example, suppose you live near a big city and some friends visit you and ask you to show them around or introduce them to some famous places. If you didn’t have the internet and weren’t a tour guide or taxi driver by profession: how would you do that?

The difference in mapping of what physically exists versus what goes on in people’s heads is significant. And it seems like the difference is getting larger – that or something related, like peoples’ ability to cross or even recognize that gap is rapidly diminishing.

What does having information mean?

When the printing press was first being deployed the majority of production went towards novels, and the criticisms were that people would not be able to distinguish between fiction and reality. There’s the famous story about a radio reading of a book that made people believe aliens really had landed on earth. More recently, video games are said to cause violence in children, and porn to cause a variety of changes in relationships between women and men.

I think all of them are right. Not in their specific claims, but in their general direction.

The principle is whatever you train for is whatever you will expect. Training in “the real world” is not an exception, as there’s quite a few “the real world”s out there, and they’re all wildly different from each other.

The more specific principle is man-made environments are very low on dimensions. If it’s text, whether it’s fiction or nonfiction, you are taking in information from a single type, literally one font, it’s linear, and it’s uninterrupted. Spend a lot of time reading text, and you’ll start thinking the world comes in one type, operates linearly, and will be forever continuous. If it’s a videogame there’s a few more parts to it, but you’re still looking at a rectangle of light, and probably using a standardized interface with limited inputs. If it’s a job, again, there’s just a few more parts to it. Major difference from the other two being you have to leave your house.

There are so many more information types in the world.

That there’s probably more types than any one can ever directly handle is only a vaguely important revelation. The more important one is there’s some arrangement of types that probably works a lot better for you than whatever you have now. This is the real reason why it’s said there are things you can’t learn from schools and books, not because they’re not discussed thoroughly in schools and books (though there’s that too), but because the types they use aren’t designed to be compatible with you.

Perhaps there’s someone that could gain a substantial understanding of Japan based off of going to tourist attractions. I doubt it. Perhaps there’s someone that could gain it off of going to museums. This requires being able to read Japanese, but it’s more plausible. I needed to wander the streets I picked out myself off random google maps streetview drops. I should have done that even more; I gained next to nothing going to the actual attractions.

But no one was going to tell me about that.

No one could have imagined to tell me about that.


References and Other Rulesets

I

“Training deals not with an object but with the human spirit and human emotions.”

The Tao of Jeet Kune Do
Bruce Lee

“I don’t care where you read it. I don’t care who said it. Even if I said it. If it doesn’t fit with what you believe and your common sense, then it is not so.”

The Buddha
as relayed by Richard Hamming

II

“Beauty is truth, truth beauty, that is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.”

John Keats

“You can get away with staggering amounts of ugliness in a city as long as it is held to a human scale and balanced with the sacred.”

Wrath of Gnon

“The wasted space (and its contribution to overall impoverishment) in our stagnant cities is definitely on my mind a lot–but it’s not surprising that high real estate costs in other cities haven’t changed things for them, mainly because they’re just too far away to benefit from places which are still thriving–they only *work* when they have functional economies of their own.

It’s like that tedious cliche about “why do Americans need to build dense when we have S P A C E” as if all the acreage in, say, Wyoming makes an ounce of a difference to people trying to live and work in, say, Boston.

Or for that matter, all the acreage in WESTERN MASS vis-a-vis the people trying to live and work in Boston.”

Alex Forrest

“Mechanical innovations, including mechanized cities, can add to our experience and stimulate our perceptive capacities, but they do not eradicate the mechanisms of human physiology.

The proper size of a bedroom has not changed in thousands of years.

Neither has the proper size of a door nor the proper size of a community. If cities have become immense, so much more is the need for subdividing them into comprehensible sections. Transportation systems may render the outlying parts of the city more accessible, but communities must remain individual entities whose size and appearance are comprehensible. The physical fact of scale must also be visually apparent. When these principles are violated the results are cities without human form, cities without sympathy, cities without pride. Worse still are the effects on the spirit and human sensitivities of its people.”

Paul D. Spreiregen
Wrath of Gnon

“The immersive ugliness of our everyday environments in America is entropy made visible. We can’t overestimate the amount of despair that we are generating with places like this. And mostly, I want to persuade you that we have to do better, if we’re going to continue the project of civilization in America. By the way, this [smiley face on a water tower] doesn’t help. Nobody’s having a better day down here, because of that.

There are a lot of ways you can describe this. I like to call it “the national automobile slum”. You can call it suburban sprawl. I think it’s appropriate to call it the greatest misallocation of resources in the history of the world. […]

The salient problem about this for us is that these are places that are not worth caring about.

[…] The public realm has to inform us not only where we are geographically, but where we are in our culture. Where we’ve come from, what kind of people we are, and by doing that, it needs to afford us a glimpse of where we’re going, in order to allow us to dwell in a hopeful present. If there is one catastrophe about the places we’ve built, the human environments we’ve made for ourselves in the last 50 years, it is that it has deprived us of the ability to live in a hopeful present.

The environments we are living in, more typically, are like these. This happens to be the asteroid belt of architectural garbage two miles north of my town […] If you stand on the apron of the Wal-Mart over here, and try to look at the Target store over there, you can’t see it because of the curvature of the Earth.

That’s nature’s way of telling you that you’re doing a poor job of defining space. Consequently, these will be places that nobody wants to be in. These will be places that are not worth caring about.

We have about 38,000 places that are not worth caring about in the United States today. When we have enough of them, we’re going to have a nation that’s not worth defending.”

How Bad Architecture Wrecked Cities
James Howard Kunstler

“America’s the best, if you really treasure your freedom, you’ll put up with 60 minutes every day each way to go 20 miles, a distance which might as well be in the middle of nowhere because it’s all single family detached residential around here. Stop complaining already. Everyone else has to deal with it too. If you don’t like it why don’t you leave? I just suck it up like a real man. I’m proud of my country. I don’t like it either,

but look at me,

I don’t complain.

This attitude is why I hate Americans. “My country, right or wrong” – except worse, because it’s not about foreign vs domestic, it’s about “Fuck you, got mine“. There’s no reasoning going on, there’s no considering of alternatives, there’s no constant seeking for improvement, it’s “eh, who cares, fuck you, got mine”. American gamers say those who are better than them “have no life”, and say those who are worse than them “casuals”. Americans who are more successful than them are “lucky or “talented”, but when they taste success themselves it’s because they have “passion” and achieved it through “hard work”. It’s so prevalent everywhere it’s would almost be funny, except they get really serious when the shit hits the fan and still refuse to believe that any of this is related.

People want housing to be close to jobs and shopping. Higher population density means more people are closer to the same amount of things. Metro systems, which have guaranteed right-of-way on their rails, connect speedily and reliably even more people to the same amount of things. This speed simultaneously connects those people to more areas than before, meaning there’s more areas competing with each other, driving the price down of, among other things, rent. All of these things are objectively desirable. All of these things are required in an ideal city.

But the people don’t care. And the city planners don’t care. The public transportation workers don’t care. The public transportation leaders don’t care. No one cares, until it looks like it might be time for them to get their cut. Then it’s not in my backyard, not my job, sorry the project was more complicated than expected, it’ll cost twice as much and take three times as long, man that janitor worked really hard this year, he deserves a raise. And then it’s back to not caring. Maybe once every five years we’ll do a week’s worth of work. Maybe once every four years they’ll pay attention. And we’re the world police superpower anyways, it’s always going to be better to live here. If those slanty eyed chinks start getting uppity we’ll just nuke them. Time for a nap.”

BART, Americans, and Attitudes, vs The East
Korezaan Su

“In most North American communities, police takes the curious form of clearly identified vehicles basically prowling the streets in search of violations (most often traffic violations). The analogy of police being predators hunting for prey is a bit too easy to make. This doesn’t help police-community relations at all, because the isolation of private vehicles means that police will rarely be in contact with the community except when intervening, so police may come to see the community they’re policing (especially if they don’t live in it) as made up of only two types of people: law violators/criminals and victims begging for help. That’s not a great way to develop a great relationship: “that community is full of criminals and people who flout the law all the time and hate us, but when they’re in trouble, suddenly it’s ‘please mr policeman, save us!!!'”.

[…] The reason for this type of policing is easy enough to understand. With people dispersed everywhere over a large area, how can a few dozen policemen provide effective surveillance if they’re not constantly on the move, at a speed that allows them to cover enough ground. This is a model that is also needlessly applied to dense neighborhoods which could have an alternative mode of policing.

Another unpleasant result of this is that policemen develop severe windshield perspective syndrome, since they spend their jobs at the wheel, they adopt the point of view of drivers, being more lax towards casual traffic violations by drivers and more likely to enforce jaywalking fines or the like on pedestrians and cyclists (and also, disrespecting bike lanes).

And what alternative mode is there? Well, again, Japan shows an interesting contrast.”

Police box: policing a walkable city
Urban kchoze

“Why are you going that far to obey the law when that law can neither judge a criminal nor protect people?”

“The law doesn’t protect people. People protect the law.

People have always detested evil and sought out a righteous way of living. Their feelings… The accumulation of those peoples’ feelings are the law. They’re neither the provisions nor the system. They’re the fragile and irreplacable feelings that everyone carries in their hearts. Compared to the power of anger or hatred, they are something that can quite easily break down. People have prayed for a better world throughout time.

In order for those prayers to continue to hold meaning, we have to try our best to protect it to the very end.”

Kogami Shinya, Tsunemori Akane
Psycho-Pass

“They spent about two weeks, and they worked in a Toyota plant.”

“Hooked up at the hip with a counterpart in the Corolla plant, someone who did the exact same job you’d be doing back in Fremont.”

“And they start to do the job, and they were pretty proud, because they were building cars back in the United States. And they wanted to show they could do it within the time allotted, and they would usually get behind, and they would struggle, and they would try to catch up. And at some point, somebody would come over and say, do you want me to help?

And that was a revelation, because nobody in the GM plant would ever ask to help. They would come and yell at you because you got behind.”

“Really, we wanted to give them a chance to see and experience a different way of doing things. We wanted them to see the culture there, the way people worked together to solve problems.”

“Then, the biggest surprise was if, when they had those problems, afterwards, somebody would come up to them and say, what are your ideas for improvement so we don’t have that problem again?

They couldn’t believe that responsiveness. I can’t remember any time in my working life where anybody asked for my ideas to solve the problem. And they literally want to know. And when I tell them, they listen, and then suddenly they disappear, and somebody comes back with the tool that I just described. It’s built, and they say try this.”

Jeffrey Liker, John Shook
This American Life #561: NUMMI 2015

“Just because something is on the internet does not mean it’s a “public space”.”

“Yeah so what? We need to make sure large companies aren’t able to control who can go where and do what. You can’t kill somebody just for being in your house. So obviously there’s a line that needs drawing.”

“You’re forgetting that another entity could provide the well for the other demographic, seeing as there’s money to be made there.”

“It’s an example of there being limited availability in resources. In the example of the water, there’s no time to wait for the market to dig another well to save the person. Any excuse can be made, but the end result is the person dies, not that property rights have been saved. The same thing is happening with social media. […] If it’s the greater races at stake. The future of civilization at stake. Then there’s no length we shouldn’t go to to save it. Property becomes less important. It’s a hierarchy of needs for civilization to survive.

[…] The entire premise is virtual or not, private or not, when something dominates how we live our lives, we need to look at how we can update those areas to reflect our values. Those values conflict with private property every day and we have to make hard decisions. Private property is an ideal just like freedom of speech, belief, etc. […] Property rights are incredibly important, but there are times they hinder civilization. If it allows us to get run over and civilization destroyed, and property rights destroyed as a result, then they weren’t very good ideals. This is why libertarians have mostly become fascists of some sort. At least until we get control of things like borders and universities.”

“There is no comparison between forcing a company to manage it’s website a certain way and border control.”

“It’s not a comparison. It’s about taking every ground we can to support the existence of civilization. Property rights are good at that, but only to a point. We also need to think in terms of collective property rights.

We can’t just wait until something reaches our doorstep. Collective power always has and always will matter.”

Arman, Unknown

“When was the first time you ever pulled an andon cord?”

“1984.”

“Where did you do it?”

“In Japan.”

“Were you at all nervous, because you’d been taught for so many years never to stop the line?”

“Yeah. And it was really exciting.”

“What got me was the fact that they had a cross bolt, and they stopped the line to repair it […] which is take the bolt out, ream the hole, put the bolt back in, instead of sending it on and putting all the other junk on top of it so you have to take it off and repair it. And whoever puts it back isn’t skilled in putting trim back, so they’re going to mess up. That impression, I said, gee, that makes sense. Fix it now so you don’t have to go through all this stuff.

That’s when it dawned on me that we can do it.

One bolt.

One bolt changed my attitude.”

Frank Langfitt, Earl Ferguson, Rick Madrid
This American Life #561: NUMMI 2015

“To grasp the essence of a political culture that does not recognise the possibility of transcendental truths demands an unusual intellectual effort for Westerners, an effort that is rarely made even in serious assessments of Japan. The occidental intellectual and moral traditions are so deeply rooted in assumptions of the universal validity of certain beliefs that the possibility of a culture existing without such assumptions is hardly ever contemplated. Western child-rearing practice inculcates suppositions that implicitly confirm the existence of an ultimate logic controlling the universe independently of the desires and caprices of human beings. This outlook, constantly reaffirmed in later life, inclines Westerners to take for granted that all advanced civilisations develop concepts of universal validity, and they are therefore not prompted to examine the effects of their absence.”

The Enigma of Japanese Power
Karel van Wolferen

“Centralization leads to complexity, complexity leads to crisis, attempts to fix the crisis have, because of complexity, unintended consequences, which escalate into further crisis, leading to further centralization, Hence Soviet Russia, Hitler’s Germany, Venezuela, and now America.

This is the crisis of socialism, explained in “I pencil”, which makes the point that no one actually knows how to make a pencil, hence socialist production of pencils will fail.

In order to manage complexity, you need walls, so that one man can make decisions without having his decisions mucked up by another man’s decisions. Hence, private property and local authority, the authority of the father, the authority the business owner, the authority of the CEO. And, not so long ago, the authority of the local aristocrat, who tended to be a high officer in the local militia, a major employer and landowner, and related by blood or marriage to most of the other high officers in the local militia.

Ideally all the consequences of a decision should be contained within those walls. Of course they never are, but if you try to manage all the externalities, things very quickly slide of control. Every attempt to manage the externalities has unexpected consequences, and attempts to deal with the unexpected consequences have additional unexpected consequences, because trying to control matters that have externalities connects everything to everything else, resulting in a tangle beyond human comprehension.”

Throne, Altar, and Freehold
Jim’s Blog

“The emperor listened intently to Zhang’s tales of exotic plants and animals, including horses that sweated blood. Most intriguing were the reports of nations that dwelled in fortified cities. They were said to be adept at commerce but “poor in the use of arms and afraid of battle” – standard characteristics of the walled and civilized. Zhang described “large countries, full of rare things, with populations living in fixed abodes and given to occupations somewhat identical to those of the Chinese people.”

People who lived like the Chinese? Now that was welcome news. In a flash, China’s alleged isolation was swept away. The Chinese had retreated behind walls only because they knew the world to be hostile and barbarian. Now they knew otherwise. Wu sent great expeditionary forces to open a lifeline to the newly discovered brethren in the fraternity of wall builders. At the time, only massive armies dared cross the terrain of the Huns, so Wu endeavored to make the route safe for travelers. He ordered the construction of a new wall – the reed-and-dirt wall discovered by Stein – to defend China’s thin link to the civilizations of Central Asia and beyond.”

Walls: A History of Civilization in Blood and Brick
David Frye
Wrath of Gnon

“Entrances have everything to do with what we feel about what we are entering. All buildings until the birth of modern architecture knew this, and you can see it in church doors, temple gates, shop entrances, and cottage doorsteps. Now the doors of a modern building are likely to be a continuation of the same hostile slab of glass or steel that makes the rest of the building sterile and aloof. There will be no place to rest for a moment, inside or out, and no shelf to rest a burden on, and no decorative details to declare, “This is not just any place you are entering, but this honorable place.” I believe even criminals feel different about the judges they encounter inside an old courthouse than inside a new one.

My wife and I walked under the Gates and beneath the curtains. Thousands of others were doing the same. Many of them no doubt made the same journey daily, scarcely thinking of it. Certainly our walk was enriched by trees, grass, shrubbery, ponds, views. But now the Gates, by framing those sights, gave them a new aspect and importance. Not “grass on a hill,” but this view of a grass hill. Not a pond, but look at the pond. A frame of any sort values what it encloses. And as we walked, we felt subtly ceremonial. We were not walking, but walking through the gates. People walked a little more slowly, and sometimes had little smiles, and talked less on their cell phones, and perhaps felt more there.”

Roger Ebert
Wrath of Gnon

“In Japan not saying grace before eating something is considered the absolute pits of rudeness and sure sign of retarded manners.”

Wrath of Gnon

“The essentials of speaking are in not speaking at all. If you think that you can finish something without speaking, finish it without saying a single word. If there is something that cannot be accomplished without speaking, one should speak with few words, in a way that will accord well with reason.”

Hagakure
Yamamoto Tsunetomo

“Footnote: Some people whose parents didn’t love them enough to teach manners, has objected to this thread thinking it is about style because I mention the International Style in the opening. Note the capitals. It is not aesthetics, it is an actual thing.”

Wrath of Gnon

“The Japanese have understood that what people are largely pursuing in the workplace is not so much money as the respect of the people around them, and therefore maintain a sophisticated – indeed, bizarrely over-elaborate to the Western eye – economy of respect in addition to the economy of money. They have understood that a large part of what money-seeking individuals really want is just to spend that money on purchasing social respect, though status display or whatever, so it is far more efficient to allocate respect directly.

Did you really think people as obviously intelligent as the Japanese were doing all those odd-looking bows for nothing? Sure, these behaviors are derived from tradition, but there’s a reason they kept these traditions and the West hasn’t. Interestingly, this understanding on their part of the need for unapologetic status differentials contradicts the emphasis in Western socialism on a culture of equality.

It also follows that if society is to maintain status differentials without suffering withdrawal of social cooperation due to the resulting resentment of low-status individuals, society must contain these status differentials within strong overarching sentiments of social unity.

Naturally, the Japanese are famous for this, too. It all fits.”

Japan, Refutation of Neoliberalism
Robert Locke

III

“I’ll go ahead and download it.”

“Why don’t you buy paper books? E-books lack character.”

“Is that right?”

“Books are not something that you just read words in. They’re also a tool to adjust your senses.

“Adjust?”

“When I’m not feeling well, there are times that I can’t take in what I read. When that happens, I try to think about what could be hindering my reading. There are also books that I can take in smoothly even when I’m not feeling well. I try to think why.

It might be something like mental tuning.

What’s important when you tune is the feeling of the paper you’re touching with your fingers, and the momentary stimulation your brain receives when you turn the page.”

“I feel kinda discouraged. When I talk to you, I feel like I’ve been missing out on something all my life.”

“You’re reading into it too much.”

Choe Guseong, Makishima Shougo
Psycho-Pass

“McLuhan provides a definition of hypnosis as: “one sense at a time.” Print is a uniform and repeatable commodity that creates a hypnotic superstition of the book as independent of and uncontaminated by human agency.”

Zero HP Lovecraft

“Philosophy appears to be expansionist. It needs to learn to stop.

China has to reboot every ten generations, but since the Chinese aren’t expansionist, they don’t overreach nearly to the extent that philosophical civilization has been prone to. The reboots succeed.

[…] Aristotle taught Alexander, and then Alexander decided he needed the entire known world. Then Rome did the same thing. And England. And America. Philosophy’s thing is kind of getting the one right answer to all the questions. When Christianity absorbed this, they decided that, since they had the one right answer, everyone needed to know it.”

Alrenous

“the Chinese, their colossal national self-regard notwithstanding, have no faith in the permanence of their political arrangements. All Chinese people, including the rulers, have internalized the dynastic cycle.”

“I wonder how much of it is genetic and how much of it is word of mouth.

When I hear others talk about the cultural revolution and the opium wars it’s always in terms like “China Was Absolutely Ravaged”.

When my dad mentions it instead it’s “Oh Yeah That Was A Thing Too”.”

Spandrell, Korezaan Su

“[O]ne trait of Asians I really like, is just how cynical and goal-oriented they are. To a large extent, discussing politics is just not done at all in Asia, unless you happen to work in politics or the media. That was boring, but also refreshing, coming from a European environment where everybody feels they must have a strong opinion on everything, from the price of bread to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Any abstract discussion of politics or philosophy in Asia is usually derided as a sophomoric attempt at showing off. Try to talk about anything not involving immediate money or gossip and you’ll soon get interrupted. “So what?”, “Your point?”, “What’s it to you?”. A common Japanese quip when you use some uncommon word is, 言いたいだけでしょ“you just want to say that word”, implying your vanity makes you feel good at using weird words that make you feel superior or high-status, but they’ve got you all figured out.

And they’re right. It got me thinking. What’s the point of all those conversations which don’t concern personal, immediate interests? It didn’t take long from that realization to finding signalling theory, and suddenly it all made sense.

Note that most of what we call Asian “philosophy” is also very down-to-earth, preoccupied with how to run a government, or how to live a good and content life. That’s just how the people are, and I still believe that they are genetically incapable of caring about metaphysics and the pointless abstraction it so often encourages.”

Spandrell

“A good player tries to read out such tactical problems in his head before he puts the stones on the board. He looks before he leaps. Frequently he does not leap at all; many of the sequences his reading uncovers are stored away for future reference, and in the end never carried out. This is especially true in a professional game, where the two hundred or so moves played are only the visible part of an iceberg of implied threats and possibilities, most of which stays submerged. You may try to approach the game at that level, or you may, like most of us, think your way from one move to the next as you play along, but in either case it is your reading ability more than anything else that determines your rank.”

Tesuji
James Davies

“I think talent is the ability to take chances, and the calm to learn from your mistakes. Skill is second to that. I’ve seen plenty others with much more skill miss great opportunities because of extreme self-consciousness or some mistaken sense of discretion.”

Sugie Shigeru
Shirobako

“Why… Why did you do such a reckless thing?!”
“This is about finding the truth behind people’s deaths! If we want to uncover such a thing, naturally we must risk our own lives!”

Tsunemori Akane, Kogami Shinya
Psycho-Pass

“There are things I just can’t do.”
“Because you never try.”
“I do the things I can as best I can.”
“And so you never accomplish anything new.”

Phosphophyllite, Antarcticite
Land of the Lustrous

“A trap is for fish: when you’ve got the fish, you can forget the trap. A snare is for rabbits: when you’ve got the rabbit, you can forget the snare. Words are for meaning: when you’ve got the meaning, you can forget the words.

Where can I find someone who’s forgotten words so I can have a word with him?”

Zhuangzi

Electone Super Live

Kyoto Station, Grand Ampitheatre

this exists solely because facebook seems to default to the final image of a post for its preview image. apparently you can control it by setting a html meta property, but that's not allowed in free wordpress. what is allowed though is putting down images in html and then setting them to not show up. so this technically is the last image - as far as facebook is concerned.

Indecision is Good [Valkyria Chronicles 4]

I hate Claude Wallace.

iron will

This guy is awful. I don’t remember the last time I was angry enough at a protagonist to scoff at the emotional climaxes and conclusion of a plot.

Valkyria Chronicles 4’s writing is bad. But mediocre writing has occurred in other games and stories without pushing me to actively hate it. Generally speaking, so long as there’s a token effort to hit all the basic requirements, I’m willing to give things a pass. Valkyria Chronicles 1 did this quite well: simple characters, simple plot, a little bit of political intrigue, and the bigger portion of writing going to setting up the world and gameplay mechanics: ragnite means industrial revolution means power means war, ragnite means radiator means weakspot, etc.

I don’t remember much of what would be called the “plot” of VC1. Which means it probably wasn’t amazing. This is fine. It was simple, and it worked. VC4 has this too, with its new addition of Squad Stories, where each of your minor characters in groups of three get their own short narrative. It also does this for a few of the supporting antagonists. But it doesn’t do any worldbuilding. And it doesn’t do this for the main characters. It even makes some really odd choices in pacing, like following up a big reveal not with an explanation, but with an entirely unrelated flashback. But these are minor problems. Many a bad story has been saved with a good protagonist.

The major problem is VC4 has Claude Wallace for a protagonist.

At first I couldn’t imagine this would be a controversial position, but after spending some time arguing on /v/ it appears there is a social duty for a literary dissection of VC4’s man with the fancy haircut. Claude Wallace probably isn’t the worst character ever in a big or semi-big name series, but he’s the worst one I’ve seen. I say this in the sense that I usually drop stories if the plot or protagonist doesn’t get it up within the first few episodes or hours – and VC4 fit very neatly in that category. VC4 is a character story, about a character that does nothing.

I thought about stopping several times. But VC4’s gameplay was fun enough, a few of the Squad Stories were entertaining, I like Raita’s designs, and Steam’s refund window closed after 2 hours, so I thought I’d give it a shot. Maybe I could be wrong?

I wasn’t.

Claude Wallace is a piece of shit.

And I am here to tell you why he’s a piece of shit.


> The Ideal
> Overview of Claude Wallace
> Claude’s Decisions and His Character
> The Counterarguments
> The Finale
> Epilogue
> Meta / On Rhetoric


Continue reading

The Lineage of Thought

A few days ago I watched the first official Elder Scrolls Legends tournament. ESL is a card videogame, and one I had basically no idea about anything in it about up until I opened the twitch stream. I have little interest in card games, but I have some general ideas about the styles of play. Partly because people play card games and I have some ideas about people, partly because a friend of mine likes card games and tells me the ins and outs of things. This friend was interested in ESL. This friend was why I was watching the tournament – he was playing in it for $20,000.

In card games there are two styles: “aggro” and “control”. Aggro is whittling down the opponent’s health at every opportunity possible, “control” is about “card advantage”, having more cards than the other guy does, which generally also means playing slower and doing more concentrated moves near the end. Whether aggro or control style is stronger depends on the mechanics of the particular game and the cards in it. New cards can move the overall favor of everything available (you can only bring a certain number of cards), and with the advent of the internet and “balance patches”, old cards can be made to do the same.

I largely stopped playing online competitive games because of these “balance patches”. I don’t like having to relearn the entire game every time something changed. Reading the “patch notes” which say this or that changed by this or that much in this or that way isn’t enough, even when they aren’t hiding changes (something else that’s made possible in videogames), because you don’t know what that number means until you play it. Many field shifts have arisen from changes that look small on paper – shifts which might not even arise until much later. To say nothing of things which look large on paper. Games have died on the spot because of such changes (Blacklight Retribution, “Recoil Update”, Jan/Feb 2013).

Not that anyone admits it at the time. The most common defenses can all be distilled to “git gud”, which means “just adapt to the changes”. There will always be a most competitive strategy, the good players will find that and use it. And if there are multiple competitive strategies, then it’s good because the game is balanced among many different styles. The problem is not with the game, it’s with you, etc.. Everything I said that was technical would be refuted, and I never had anything much to say that could be generalized. So I just stopped playing things I stopped liking. And then stopped playing changing games in general.

Watching this card game tournament I had no idea about gave me an idea. It’s not so frequent I spend a decent chunk of time with something I have no technical knowledge of. And while I did catch onto a few things, I largely relied on the casters and the twitch chat to tell me what was going on. Showing the board and even the players’ hands meant nothing to me. The only part of the video that was useful was the face-cams, showing players’ reactions.

The faces told me that the decks are extensions of the players.

A couple of people I couldn’t read, but for the majority, I couldn’t see them playing in a different style than the way that they actually played. Perhaps professional players decide on which style or cards to play based on whatever happens to be strongest at the moment. But I imagine those players think of the game the same way a regular person thinks of their job. They wouldn’t feel at all.

These players didn’t play certain cards and styles because they were good. They played cards and styles because it fit them. Certain cards and styles being good was the cause of these players being here.

If other cards and styles were better, different players would have been here instead.

(There’s also luck of the draw and life circumstances and all the other things that change results that can’t ever really be accounted for; we’re talking about what can be here.)

The idea that this or that thing becomes stronger or weaker through balance patches is true, but only from the game’s point of view. It assumes the game’s existence. It assumes you are already going to play it, and will play whatever happens to be the wining strategy. This perspective is useful to the creators and the media, but not much to anyone else. Whether this or that thing is strong is a large part of why people play things in the first place. It’s probably the only thing that has any staying power – after 10 or 20 hours, the pretty music and beautiful art or big name is not going to matter as much as how the game flows.

What flow is right depends on the player. A competitive player doesn’t become competitive because he uses something that everyone already knows is strong. He is competitive because he thinks and plays a certain way, found something in this game that fit that existing way, and demonstrates through winning that something in the game happens to be stronger than the rest. If he doesn’t find it, he’s not competitive. If he does, then he is. The information available presents a certain story, which needs to be filtered backwards through survivorship bias. If a man is playing a card game and he dominates, the inclination is to think it’s because that card is strong. But that’s only the visible part of the equation. That’s the “card” part of card game. The players of the game existed long before the cards came into existence.

This idea was demonstrated at the Elder Scrolls Legends tournament. In one of the highlight plays of the event, my friend failed to use a card effect to deal the finishing blow to the opponent, opting instead to do something that would increase overall survivability. He lost the round right after he did that – but that’s not the point. The move probably did increase overall survivability. He played that move because he’s always looking for increasing survivability. This is what the redundant “winning by not losing” and “winning by just killing the other guy” and similar sayings mean. Personofsecrets is a control player: he favors “winning by not losing”. And that means not seeing “winning by just killing the other guy” things.

Once the casters explained the technical details of the card effect, I thought it made sense just fine. But that’s because I know how this guy plays games. I have an idea of what this guy is capable of. People “can” do things that they “aren’t” capable of, but generally, they can’t.

“I’m not sure why there is a theory that I would be deliberate and not go for a win if I see it. To clear up the wrong theories, if I had ever targeted my own creature with Black Hand Messenger, then that would have been the very first time.

“My tendencies as a player likely leave me with some blind spots when it comes to trading versus pushing damage. Maybe if I was a little more well rounded, then I wouldn’t have made such an error. One other thought is that perhaps a reason that I got to where I got to has to do with such idiosyncrasies and focus on making trades that I have.

It’s a blindspot.

Managing them is a skill, but that too requires a method, and any method has its blindspots. There will always be blindspots, because you can’t see everything, and you can’t keep everything in mind. One can say players are good because they win and bad because they lose. That’s one way of looking at things. I don’t think it’s a very useful one; it’s pretty clearly circular. But it’s how many people think about it. Including game developers, who often are only looking at overall win rates.

The important part of balance patches isn’t that they change the game.

It’s that they change who plays it.

You are attracting, and repelling, certain kinds of people, by “balancing” the game in certain ways. Players come and go depending on what the balance of the game is, and that “balance” they are looking at and feeling through isn’t the four sigfigs percentage on some spreadsheet.

It’s obvious enough when comparing one game to the next, this game is good and that game is bad, why, because “I don’t like it” i.e. ‘It doesn’t fit me’, or “It’s toxic” i.e. ‘I don’t fit in with the other people who play it’. It’s still obvious when comparing a game to itself from one year or title to the next. The realm of confusion grows the smaller of a scale it goes, but it’s still the same pattern. One person only has one mindset to bring with them everywhere – from life, to that game, to this game. If they’re going to play this game, that mindset will have to work there too. If it doesn’t, either they change the mindset, or they stop playing. The normal outcome is they stop playing. There’s so many other things in life that mindset is used for.

And it is “one person” that plays the game. Not “the fans”.

“Git gud”? Yes.

But that is also how a game dies. Getting good at something is finding out how to make something work for you – and some things won’t. People have their tendencies, people have their limits. Personofsecrets left Hearthstone because it was or became too favored to aggro. It so happens Hearthstone is still king of card videogames – but that’d be because aggro is “right”, not because it’s “balanced”. Balanced doesn’t mean anything unless you know what it’s balancing against. I left Blacklight Retribution because it stopped being about strategy. Blacklight was an FPS that favored mid-range thinkers, not long-range campers or short-range twitchers. It balanced that. So the people who were there for strategy left. With that, Blacklight not only had a small playerbase, it also had little to differentiate between it and any other FPS.

And so it died.

It’s a principle.

Why do companies succeed or fail? Not because they’re profitable, but because they have a structure behind it that happens to survive and succeed with how the world works at the time.

Poke it here, poke it there, whether it’s already in “the” law or not; make it do things it normally doesn’t in enough ways, it will die. Balance patches, or “forcing innovation”, doesn’t mean that whatever desired will actually happen. The government or “public” may want something to happen, but other than the laws of physics and other limits of technical implementation, the structures of companies also determines whether something will exist. Or whether the company exists. Which, the more you look into history, you’ll find that’s frequently the original intent; the technical details are just followthrough.

But, just like with games, these presume that civilization will still exist after the change. And, just like with games, people won’t admit it if it so happens that it doesn’t.

Why do people succeed or fail?

Not because they get a big job with big money, but because they have a structure behind it that happens to survive and succeed with how the world works at the time.

Liberalism is the currently popular paradigm that “everything can be discussed”. This idea excludes anyone who thinks there’s some things that can’t be discussed. There’s actually quite a few things many people don’t think should be talked about. When they’re forced to say and believe they can, they naturally respond with depression, drug addiction, and any number of delusional contradictory ideas.

Recently there was also a theft of a plane from the Seattle-Tacoma airport. The guy ended up doing “nothing“: he killed only himself. There’s a lot of words going around, like “we need to talk about mental health”. But what does that mean? What does it mean to anyone?

Nothing. Nothing is what it means. It’s a replaceable line with “we need gun control” and all the other ones is what it means. To say bad mental health causes suicides is like saying bad players don’t get wins. It means nothing to anyone, it’ll be forgotten in a week, because that’s what things on TV mean, and TV is the only thing that exists outside of toiling to get money. People don’t have the correct lineage of thought, or even the idea of a lineage of thought, so they can’t predict anything, nor can they figure out why it happened after it has happened. What’s probably going to happen, if anything is going to happen, is some nonsense thing like mandatory checkups with a psychiatrist for anyone that’s around planes. No, it’ll probably be cheaper, like annual rewatching a couple of hours of training videos. Why? Because that’s the structure that exists in companies today. And that’s the structure people have put up with.

But they don’t have to. That’s what the SeaTac guy did.

Is life under an existentially disgusting structure better than quitting?

The game assumes its existence. The game will change its players so that only “fans” will play.
Those that disagree, stop playing the game.

So yes.

It is.

A Mountain in the Jungle

nier automata 2b in forest facing forest king


NieR:Automata

Let us start with the proposition:
So long as you attempt to understand the world, it can be understood.

What do we have at hand for such a lofty goal?

The materials as a whole can be called “experience”. Whatever you experience is the only method of information input you have from the world. It does not matter if it’s through your own senses, by someone else’s words, or through reading text and looking at pictures: that is experience. Without experience, you have nothing to work with. You must experience in order to understand.

The tools as a whole can be called “thought”. With thought we remember; compare one past event to the next. Perhaps notice patterns here, perhaps guess causes there. We assume meaning and connections so they can be found, and hopefully, when one is found, it allows us to gain an understanding of the world; that is to say, to predict the future.

The final category, of the plan on what to build, can be called “decisions”. The world is vast. The world has many things, and even more relationships between. Which of them do you want to understand? In what way do you want to understand them? These are not given through experience, nor will you find them in comparisons through thought. These are not about the world. They are about you. Just as you must decide to build an understanding, you must also decide what form that understanding will take.

This is where I decided to start writing my understanding of human thought and human civilization.

This is where the enemies number the most. Those that number against the above tenets – the principles that say that knowledge is possible – are vast. They are so vast it is useful to think of the world as consisting of two kinds of people: you, and everyone else.

Everyone else will lie to you. Everyone else will gaslight you. You might lie to yourself too, but you are also the only one who can build your understanding. Everyone else can only and will only tell you that knowledge is impossible and you are delusional.

Among them are:

Utopia/Equalists: They will say you can’t separate people into different groups.
Bigotry/Womanism: They will say you can’t think things because someone might feel bad.
NAXALT/ESID/Platonism: They will say you are wrong because you are not perfectly consistent.
Studies/Experts/Numericism: They will say you need the fancy letters and tabled numbers.
Management/Authoritarianism: They will say you don’t know all the details.
Straight Up Lying/Journalism: They will fabricate things simply to contradict you.
Bootstraps/Americanism: They will imply only the lazy embark on your endeavor.

It is not possible to respond to all of them, much less to any particular point.

Thankfully, it is also not necessary to respond. We’re after an understanding of the world… and they don’t have it. Not only don’t they have it, they aren’t looking for it. Not only aren’t they looking for it, they don’t even understand the concept of looking for something. These enemies are not an opposing army; it’s not your red team versus their blue team. It’s your red team against the insects, the animals, the trees, the flow of the river, the rain from the clouds, the sun in the sky. They’re fighting you, but not on the same level. They’re fighting you on something else entirely.

A concept that generally explains their behavior: they are talking about their dick. How long and how wide it is. How long they can go, how long they can… and so on. They usually don’t use the exact reference, but all in all it’s the same sentiment. For example: why does it matter that some idea I come across or decide to build might hurt someone’s feelings? Unless the objective in question involves other peoples’ feelings in some way, why would such a point be relevant? Because people with big dicks care. And if you don’t agree, that’s because you have a small dick. Hey everyone! This guy has a small dick!

Traditionally this was called “morality”, more recently it’s been called “signalling”. I generally prefer modelling it as dickwaving, because that’s usually about as much as they can be bothered to prop up their concerns. Womanism, Platonism, Journalism, all of it can be approximately reduced to “My dick is thiiis big!”. It’s about them and their superiority. The moment you start talking about problems and solutions, they go away. Or they repeat themselves ad nauseum. Occasionally they violently shut you down. In any case they will never respond to your points.

The points they bring up might be right. They may even be useful. But whatever you do, never bend to the people behind them. They number so many and the motivation behind the words is so obvious and overwhelming, you will, from time to time, forget the desire that started you off in the first place.

You must not lose that desire.

The desire and the understanding are not so much two separate things as they are cause and effect. You must believe that something is there before you can conceive of even the idea to look for it. The common criticisms to this logic are that the thing may turn out to not exist at all, or that you may mistakenly start seeing things that aren’t there. These are valid concerns. But they’re secondary. They only matter after you’ve set off on your journey. Whatever the idea might be, it will not be there if you don’t think it is possible, it won’t ever appear in front of you on its own. This is not true of physical objects, which are there whether or not you believe it. Ideas are different from physical objects in a number of ways. This is one of the important ones: the answer to “If all you have is a hammer, everything starts looking like a nail” is “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”

You must desire an understanding if you are to have one.

So we start with the proposition: so long as we attempt to understand the world, it can be understood. And when we forget, which we will, this is where we will begin again.

We begin, with the blind faith and belief that it can be done.

“There has to be an answer. You must not doubt that.

If you can’t believe that, why don’t you cry yourself to sleep, and then just give up and die?”


> Intro / “There is Only One Game”
> Technical Implementation “Capturing the Essence”
> Human Thought Space / “All Else is Halation”
> Gnostic Technology / “The World Beyond Words”
> A Mountain in the Jungle
> Epilogue / “References and Other Rulesets”


Technical Implementation

All things are built on technical implementation.

If you want to buy something, someone else has to be selling it. If you want clean clothes tomorrow morning, someone has to wash it. If you want the light to turn on, you’re going to have to walk over and flip the switch. If the switch is going to turn the light on without burning the house down, the wires can’t be frayed. If your dishes are going to be clean, the water lines must be clear. If someone else is going to sell to you, they need to trust that your money will go through.

We have generally lost the concept that things have requirements outside of time and money. This has been true for a while for bureaucrats of all sorts; the rest of us have gotten closer to them with globalization and internetization. Everything is run by accountants and managers now. When all you have is a spreadsheet, everything looks like a cell; when you have that and consistently get what you want, those few things which fit in cells will appear to explain the world. It doesn’t matter that we call it “information technology”, it’s reduced our understanding because we haven’t thought about what its existence means. Such words evoke the visual imagery of an immaculately clean environment with crisp blue water, clipped green grass, clean white walkways, and towering glass skyscrapers. It doesn’t call to mind anything about how such a world would function in achieving its goals, much less its maintenance, or how it’ll arise in the first place.

You need a map of a place to get there. You need a plan of a place to build it. Today we have only a picture and think that’s enough. Worse, we think it’s a picture of the present. This is not so bad so long as we achieve what we want – and there are an endless number who will talk about how we have things so great today; how nearly everyone has a refrigerator and we live better than medieval kings’ wildest dreams. If a refrigerator or some other modern amenity is enough for you to be happy about life, then that’s great. Good for you. God’s in His Heaven, All’s Right with the World. If you however notice that federal programs that set out to plant refrigerators in poor households don’t really seem to change their nature, or in any other matter don’t think the world is just fine and dandy, regardless of what the television priests say, then there’s more to it. The spreadsheet mindset is obviously insufficient. The understanding of the world has holes which require something else to improve. There is more to the world than employment rates and GDP. There exists more fundamental materials than just man-hours and dollar-quantities.

And we can find out what those are.

If it was built by man, it can be understood by men. Rearranged: If it is to be built by man, then however it will be built must be understandable by men. Once upon a time, every place everywhere was the hypothetical “desert island”. Anything any of us have beyond that was built at some time by some man, through some complicated, but necessarily comprehensible, set of technical implementations.

In the case of the literal desert island, we have the story of Robinson Crusoe. In the case of the modern version with the zombie apocalypse, we have a whole assortment to choose from.

My personal favorite is the story behind the Transatlantic Cable.

In a sense it’s not as grand; it’s neither building everything from nothing nor about societal collapse. But I feel it illustrates the most important principles. It’s a story about how to take a single step, where the details clearly serve the goal, rather than the all-too-common obverse. It’s also far enough back in time and thought that it’s obvious that they lived in a different world, yet not so far we doubt our ability to relate to them – we’re able to see the fishbowl, yet still properly empathize with the fish.

The plan was to lay a cable to connect Europe and America.

The cable would be for the telegraph, the era was the 1850s, the approximate speed change on message delivery between the two continents from a matter of weeks to a matter of minutes (though a full message would still take hours to fully transmit). Ships were run still on coal and propelled by paddles, and the only reason it was possible at all was because Britain had colonies in the tropical East which happened to have certain kinds of trees which happened to produce a certain kind of material. That material had been used almost since antiquity as toys for children; more recently it was discovered to remove pencil marks off paper. As electrification of cities had not yet occurred (~1880+), this would be the first large-scale usage of the material ‘rubber’. Telegraph lines are electrical, you need to protect them from water along their entire length – in this case, it would be the length of the Atlantic Ocean.

The first cable laid worked only for a few weeks.

It turned out the knowledge of electricity and cable design which had been tested and used at the time were not sufficient to achieve acceptable results over the new 2000-mile system. As it only lasted a few weeks – less than two cycles of communication between Europe and America – many did not believe it was even real, public support was negligible, and it took another five years before enough capital was gathered for another attempt.

The second cable was lost.

Halfway along, in the middle of the ocean, it snapped off the end of the ship. The cable had been designed to resist much tensile force, but for one reason or another, it wasn’t enough.

The next year a third cable was laid with no problems. But this time the mission was not just to lay a cable. It was to also finish the other one. The one that they had lost the previous year.

This was 1866. Long before the age of GPS. They had sextants and chronometers to be sure, so one could know his location on the endless sea to some approximation. GPS has an accuracy of around 5m. Sextant accuracy, depending on the navigator using it and a number of other things, is on the order of 500m~5000m. It was with sextants and paddleships that they would have to use to find a cable in the middle of an ocean. Beyond that it was a matter of throwing a hook off the back, running out the several miles (1mi=1600m) of rope for a few hours for it to hit the bottom, and then sailing around until they found it.

So that’s what they did.

They went to where they lost it, and threw a hook off the back.

Then they sailed around until they found it.

They found it.

It took them two weeks, but they found it. And then, just as they managed to get it above water, it snapped and they lost it. It took them another two weeks to find it again.

This time they did not lose it. Once they brought it aboard, much more carefully than before, they tested it. Who knows if a year at those depths had not caused something to occur to the material? Who knew if, somewhere else along those thousand miles, several miles down, something had not disconnected the cable from its station in Ireland? The general understanding was that the world would eventually erode into the sea, which had a featureless, sandy bottom. This was 1866. Plate tectonics will not be proposed until 1912. Deep-sea vehicles that can look at what’s actually going on down there will not exist until 1960.

In any case, the cable of 1865 happened to be functional.

They spliced it with the cable they had on board, and ran it back the thousand miles to Newfoundland.

The time it took them to lay the cable on their first journey that year took two weeks. They spent a little over a week in port to load up on supplies and eight thousand tons of coal. Their successful return happened four and a half weeks later.

There were now two working transatlantic lines.

The amount of money and time it took to do what they did wasn’t “because” they were using “older” technology. To them, the stuff they were using wasn’t old at all. The ship used in 1865 and 1866, called the Great Eastern, had a screw propeller, fairly new technology at the time, along with paddles and sail, which were the standard. A vessel less than 10 years old, she was upon completion the largest ship ever built, doubling the previous record in both length and in width. Again, mass electrification wasn’t yet a thing, so telegraph cables, especially these ones, were the cutting edge of technology that only the richest and most powerful could afford. Sextants weren’t so new, but what were they going to use instead?

So they threw a hook off the back.

You do what you want with what you got. If you have GPS, use that. No GPS, use a sextant. No sextant, use star charts. No star charts, remember where on the horizon the sun rose that day the best you can, remember where you came from the best you can, sail in that direction, and pray to god you reach port before you run out of supplies.

World War 2 had very few vehicles in it. The majority of logistics and supplies were on horse-drawn wagons. The car had been invented for a while, but those were expensive, and a lot of car companies were building planes. Germany in particular had no oil production of its own and was blockaded from all sides, so they were pressed for alternatives. Economies pre-war were mostly agrarian, i.e. most people were farmers and there was a bunch of farm land. Hence, horses.

In the Cold War, there was a spy plane called the SR-71. This plane leaked oil on the ground. Flying at thrice the speed of sound makes things hot, hot materials expand; the parts were designed to fit together correctly at speed. These and other spy planes would then fly over other peoples’ land and take pictures. On film. The first spy satellites also used film, and dropped canisters with parachutes after completion.

Today, missile interception largely does not exist. One attacking intercontinental ballistic missile can launch several warhead: you cannot do the same with a defensive interceptor. This “cost-exchange ratio” was discovered before missiles became commonplace, and it was clearly cheaper to just fire back. The concept of intercepting missiles was known in World War 2 when only the Germans had them, but it wasn’t possible. There was no computer strong enough and fast enough to figure out how to intercept the target. Computers at the time were mechanical, with gears and shafts. There was also no weapon with enough range or speed to intercept: anti-aircraft guns could not hope shoot down something going that fast. Today, with modern digital computers which we can literally stick in the missile (minus all the support structure, e.g. satellites in space watching for launches), an interception missile still takes years to design and incur costs so large they’re noticeable to world powers. World powers can’t just throw infinite time and money at it. They have multiple things to deal with at any given point in time.

Everyone has multiple things to deal with at any given point in time.

It’s just that almost no one pays attention to what that means.

Perhaps people in the past didn’t understand this sort of thing either, but they definitely don’t understand it today. Through “information technology” everything that actually occurs is reduced some nonsense non-technical non-actionable value, because that’s the kind of thing that fits on a spreadsheet. Dollar values and opinion polling statistics fit on spreadsheets. “Leak oil on the runway” and “Throw a hook off the back” doesn’t.

But “Throw a hook off the back” is what actually does the work. Do what you want with what you got: all things are built on technical implementation. Today and tomorrow, just as it was yesterday and the day before, no matter how many white lab coats with large flat screens there are or how many clean and sleek white unibody high-tech machines roll around, whatever is being done, at the level of things being done – if things are being done – those people are doing their equivalent of throwing a hook off the back.

Let us start with the proposition:

So long as you attempt to understand the world, it can be understood.

Start with what you know, the results are not the structure.

Throw a hook off the back. And we’ll see what we can find.


Human Thought Space

Knowledge has certain properties.

There are things it can and can’t do. There are places it can and can’t go.

Put another way: our usage of knowledge has certain properties. Or, if you prefer: human knowledge has certain properties. These appendages (among other possible examples) can’t actually be separated from knowledge “itself”; there’s not really such a thing as knowledge that exists outside of our using it, nor is there knowledge that isn’t human. So in a sense it’s all logically equivalent to just “knowledge has certain properties”. But the different phrasing helps gives us an idea on how to approach it. For all the boasting about being in the information age and having access to everything, people have an exceedingly poor understanding on the technical details of what it means to know anything.

About the only thing everyone knows is fact versus opinion. The classical version used on children is ice cream, which is better chocolate or vanilla; the answer is an opinion not a fact. It’s also a complete and utterly useless distinction. What does having these categories accomplish?

Suppose I said vanilla is better. Guess what flavor scoop I’m going to get?

Extending the question makes it even more obvious: if you leave the room and come back, the ice cream disappears, and I say that kid over there stole and hid the buckets, what are you going to do? “Fact or opinion”? Suppose a kid did steal and hide the buckets, and you bring it up to their parents picking him up. Are they thinking, “fact or opinion”? Ridiculous. Fact and opinion are non-actionable categories thought up of by dickwavers. “That’s just your opinion” Of course it’s my opinion, it came out of my mouth. The question is, do you believe it? I make a claim; what is your response? Those two categories don’t help you make decisions. They’re not technical. They can’t be used.

We are interested in what mental processes help us inform action. “Fact”, “opinion”, belief, theory, knowledge, understanding; these and others are approximately the same thing as far as we are concerned, and we are concerned with technical implementation. Technical implementation: out of all those words, for reasons that aren’t important, people seem to have the highest affinity for “knowledge”, so that’s the one I opened with. I don’t think it’s very illustrative, but general-purpose widely-used words and phrases are mostly about signalling and rarely illustrative. Illustrations, as with technicals, are specific first. Here, I like the combination of “human thought space”.

“Human thought space” has certain properties.

There are things it can and can’t do. There are places it can and can’t go.

Some things may have an effect on how quickly you can navigate through the space. Other things may have an effect on how large the space even is. None of these properties or items are properly appreciated today, so it is the obvious result that their understanding is so poor. They’re treated like superfluous decorations, lifestyle choices at best (“opinions”), and easily reversible errors at worst (“oops”).

For example: mental clarity is affected by sleep. If you are chronically lacking in sleep, you are not going to think as clearly. The less you sleep, the more mistakes you will make. You will eventually cause major problems and forget things that would, if you slept well, be perfectly obvious. But you didn’t.

The average response is somewhere along the lines of “just get more sleep”, as if anyone and everyone who happens to be in question is equivalent to an irresponsible carefree college kid. This lack of appreciation for the technical details which determine the conditions of human thought space is what causes people to get “unintentionally” and systematically deprived of sleep in the first place. Which is fine if it’s brushing off someone you’re never going to see again, but – as would be expected – those who are chronically deprived of sleep are common in socially and physically critical positions. The two I’m aware of are doctors and air traffic controllers. I’m sure I could guess accurately at a few more.

There’s also a lot of other of these external affectors (like nutrition), but the probably really long list of those is not particularly important here. We’re not after any list, at least, not one beyond what can sufficiently help us with the specific yet large problem we want to solve.

It so happens the list can be reduced to one item – an internal affector. Something inside human thought space that changes what else is in there, and how we get around inside it. An idea that changes other ideas.

An idea that gives order to other ideas.

Wikipedia has a long list of “Cognitive Biases”; “bias” means “arbitrary personal preference toward error”. These include items which should be at least vaguely familiar to everyone, like the bandwagon effect, dunning-kruger effect, confirmation bias, and hindsight bias, along with quite a few other things, and the expected description then dismissal of each. There’s even a section at the bottom called “Common theoretical causes of some cognitive biases”, linking to a number of other pages of various lengths, some even including math and symbols. All in all, the equivalent of a bunch of D&D role-playing board gaming bespectacled nerds getting together, using long complicated words read from manuals and paired with dice rolls, and the campaign title is “The Quest to Find Out the Reason Why Stupid People are Stupid”. I mention them for the same reason I used the word “knowledge”: everyone has a decent affinity for them.

The other reason is they got pretty close.

At this time on that page there exists a graphic which lays out the hundred or so items in a circular arrangement, with some number of subcategories, and then four large categories which encompass them all. The four categories are:

“Need To Act Fast”,
“Too Much Information”,
“What Should We Remember”, and
“Not Enough Meaning”.

Speed, Sorting, Recall, Usage: these are not just causes of biases.

These are primary dimensions along which human thought space lies.

“It doesn’t matter what you know. It matters only what you can think of in time.”

And there are limits to this. Obvious limits. Individual limits.

Your limits.

What you can think of in time at the time is what matters, not the sum total of all things you’ve think you’ve ever learned or heard of. Not what some dickwaver wants to claim at some other time. Did you get enough sleep? Have you been eating well? What were you thinking about, what were you paying attention to? Did you bring enough rope for the hook to hit the bottom? Did you bring enough coal for the trip back? These are what matter.

These are what’s underappreciated today.

There’s a number of ways you could effectively arrange and order the human thought space; this is the one I prefer, and I think it’s the most important one of them all. It’s not so much because it contains all that much in itself, but because it intuitively connects many other important things.

“It matters only what you can think of in time.”

This line for me calls: What do I know? How do I know? When did I know it? Who did I hear it from? What detail do I know it in, and what paths did I take to arrive at that point?

It turns thoughts from nebulous not-seen not-objects into things that are-spatial and are-physical, thus, even if I don’t really get it at the time, I understand viscerally that it has its boundaries. They might not be height length and width, or even temperature and weight. But they’re something, on some dimension. They’re things that exist, so they’re finite, and finite things have properties which can be found. If things can be found, they can be understood; if things can be understood, they can be grasped.

And if things can be grasped, then they can be implemented for grander purposes.

All things are built on technical implementation. This is how I model ideas so they can be implemented. I can’t know or see everything at the same time, or even remember all the things I have known and have seen, so I need a system. A system of ideas. An idea of a logic that connects and recalls one idea to the next.

An idea-logic. An idealogos.

An ideology.

These are not superfluous decorations or lifestyle choices. These are the fundamental dimensions on understanding, the equivalent of the laws of physics for thought. Human thought space has certain properties. This ideology will help us remember some of it.

When I was thinking and figuring out the problem, I didn’t spend too much time on this step. It was a thing I came back to after getting lost more than anything else. The line I’ve been quoting is from The Book of Five Rings, which, along with the Hagakure, are called ‘the books of the samurai’. They’ve been around me for a while so I’m intuitively familiar with the properties of the tool/model, even if I wasn’t clear where or how specifically beforehand it’d be used at every point on a project of this scale.

In writing, I felt “It matters only what you can think of in time” needed to be specifically explained at some length. A number of things I will say, including at least a few critical ones, have the risk of causing an unconscious flippant dismissal because the words will seem to form tautologies.

A “well duh”. Or a, “yeah, I knew that”.

But it doesn’t matter what you know.

And there are ways of getting to the right idea. Faster, more reliably, and more ahead of time.

It is true that each thing could simply be extended so that each is a path rather than a step, but for many of the ones ahead I decided to only explicitly note it here beforehand instead. Certain things are much better quickly and in quick succession, and only have certain effects when presented in that way. In this case, I desire those effects. But I also want their component parts, completely foreign to common discourse, to be properly grounded. If the best I can get is isolated and in simple contrast beforehand so that eventually and unconsciously the principle may be discovered, then that’s what I’ll take.

The technical implementation of my understanding – as far as my ability in writing can go and how much time I’m willing to spend and so on – means that this plane will just have to leak oil on the ground.

For me, it’s been leaking for a long time. For you, hopefully not so much.

Hopefully, it will all fit together now at speed.


Gnostic Technology

The world has certain properties. There are things it can and cannot do. There are places it can and cannot go. Let us start with the proposition: so long as you attempt to understand the world, it can be understood – specifically, human civilization. If all things are built on technical implementation, then civilization too has parts which we can examine and use to reconstruct the nature of the whole.

A thing is defined as how it behaves and operates – that is to say, what it does.

What does civilization do?

Throw a hook off the back: let’s say civilization gets together for a single simple yet large project. This is a knowable step which definitely (i.e. “by definition”) contributes to the whole, and being a large project, it would involve theoretically the largest proportion of people, thus being more fitting to help determine what civilization is. You may replace my example with any particular one you prefer and fill in your own details;

I will pick the building of a battleship.

Not only are they large projects, battleships are the greatest moving mechanisms ever built, the single most glorious monument to its creators’ capabilities.

Question:

Who exactly is the creator of a battleship?

A battleship is generally recognized as a product of a country. What is a country? A country is generally recognized by the two-dimensional shape of its political borders as they hit natural coastlines, centerlines of mountain ranges, historical treaties, and so on.

Does this two-dimensional shape covering vast amounts of space build battleships?

No.

Then what is the use of this two-dimensional shape in regards to building battleships?

There isn’t one.

This kind of problem will be frequent and reoccurring.
We will largely choose to chase our objective.

Countries are mostly empty – empty of people. There is only civilization where there is people, and people tend to be together. Usually, they congregate near water. Better yet, where fresh water meets the sea. These don’t exist everywhere, and if another group is already in the area, for water or for any other reason, people will usually either join that one, or go somewhere else, far away. What they don’t do is get a census and map, calculate the average, then some other math to find what coordinates and what size plot is theirs. There is a number of actual reasons; none of them have geographic uniformity in mind.

As for everything else a country is made out of: they don’t matter. The trees, the grass, the sand, and the fish. It can be said that having a nice climate with nature to relax in or an ease of access to various materials is related in some way. But we need to start somewhere. For me it’s obvious, if not just take it as an arbitrary assumption; we’ll say for now that only people matter in building a battleship.

When a country builds a battleship, it means only the parts of that country that can help in building a battleship, build the battleship. The rest of the it may serve any number of other purposes, or perhaps not at all and are even a nuisance; in any case it’s not all the land or the people, not even if you count up the farms including the food supply chain that keeps everyone alive. There are more people doing more things than just your battleship, even if it’s a total war economy and even if you are literally only fielding battleships – someone has to be making pencils and paper, utensils and clothing – farms keep those other guys alive too.

So which parts build battleships?

Shipyards, for one. So that part would be near a body of water, preferably one that connects to the oceans and isn’t some isolated lake. I imagine really large steel forges would be needed, along with iron supply, so unless the shipyard is also near some mountains or wherever iron is mined, the “building” will occur in at least two places. People who are familiar with manufacture of ammunition in some way would be recruited. A university or some place that has engineers and knowledge would be needed to make firing control computers. The navy would probably be consulted as to what kind of design they’d prefer depending on their doctrine. A whole number of bureaucrats would be needed to keep track of information going here and there. And of course, the food supply chain and all the other basics.

I’m probably missing some things.

But it’s not too important. We have an idea on what to look for now.

And we have a grasp on the general principle we came for.

A country is not monolithic, it is its civilization. A civilization is not monolithic, there is only civilization where there is people. Even when a civilization comes together for a great project, it isn’t everyone in it doing all the same things, it is specific people doing specific things. It’s a really different picture of civilization, a much more detailed one with parts that can intuitively be understood, compared to the extremely well-defined shapes on a map that in totality cover every square inch of land above water on the entire planet which appear arbitrary and opaque. That “political” map is what normally comes to mind when we think of “the world” – that is to say, that map is the world.

Or, was the world. Now we know there can be something different. A map of civilization, one that’d look a lot closer to a map of population density, where things are few and infinitely far between, where borders on a world map would look very poorly defined. Rather than lines running latitudes, longitudes, coasts, and mountain ranges, nearly all of which no one lives in, much less sees… borders are now always people. Borders between the parts of a civilization building a battleship, and the parts that aren’t. Borders between one civilization and the next.

Borders between one civilization and the savage beyond.

And there is a savage beyond.

If you are driving on and then fly off a cliff, it doesn’t matter that, on a map, you go only a distance of five minutes walk from the road. Five minutes walk on a well-lit well-cleaned named street in a city is very different from five minutes walk in nature’s wilderness. It doesn’t matter if that spot on the road is only twenty minutes drive from a decent sized city. You go off that cliff, you are no longer in civilization. You may bring things that civilization made with you, but you are no longer on it. If no one saw you fly off that road, if you weren’t expected that night, or the next morning, or whoever was expecting you next decides it’s not worth looking into; if that cliffside road didn’t have a guardrail that broke to show evidence that something abnormal happened; if under that cliff was a forest and your car didn’t burn, or if something did burn and the park ranger decided to not pay attention that day – the more of those and those kinds of things happen, the further from civilization you get.

The spectacle, generalized: at any moment, if you are alone, you are outside civilization.

Civilization is not out there. Civilization is not some independent abstract entity.

Civilization is here, between you and me.

Everything that civilization has, needed to be built, and everything that’s built needs to be maintained. These are done by people. Us. If we want civilization to be a certain way, then it will become that way. Everything starts with us.

That being said: “we”, too, has certain properties.

There are things “we” can and cannot do. There are places “we” can and cannot go. All things are built on technical implementation – and we already know that human thought space has its limits. Human action space imposes more limits. Human cooperation space…

And if things have limits, they can be known.

What exactly is this “we”?

We know that it’s not everyone. It doesn’t matter if it’s building a battleship or sealing/dealing with a hole in the ozone layer, there is no such thing as something that involves everyone. In at least the current standard usage of the word, even the word “everyone” isn’t everyone: it refers to only all people who are currently alive. What about the ancients? What about posterity? Are they not people too? In quite a number of analyses and decisions, to say that those groups can be “pretty important” would be quite the understatement. Yet, neither the past nor the future is included in “everyone”. Even as it is, just everyone on the planet today is unwieldy. It’s impossible to understand.

We know when something exists, it is specific, and the result of specific people doing specific things. “Everyone” was sufficiently specific when contrasted to nature, but it’s not good enough anymore.

What does civilization have?

Running water, stable food supply, in this age electricity, in any age material search, procurement, and processing. Language, culture, markets, policy and conflict resolution, some kind of future to look forward to.

“Everything starts with us”: Who exactly is doing what?

A handful of people “do” almost everything.

All the things above are largely the results of large organizations, each comprising of hundreds to hundreds of thousands, which do approximately what one or two people say. Running water isn’t a bunch of people standing in line each handing the other a bucket with everyone being equally valuable. It wasn’t like that when it was wells and aqueducts, it’s not like that today, and it’s not like that for anything else, names like “free market” and “democracy” or not.

There are people who make decisions that affect more people, there are people who make decisions that affect less; it so happens that it has and will always be true that a handful of people make decisions that affect almost everyone. These people are called the elite. They are elite because they make significantly large decisions – while we have tools like hammers and computers, their tools are companies. They de jure own large chunks of “the economy”, and by extension, de facto own large chunks of everything else. Civilization does what the elite wants…

…if they do their part correctly. All things are built on technical implementation. The elite, too, need to wield their organizations in a certain way in order to get what they want. Fail that, and they may eventually find themselves no longer elite. Fail enough, and eventually there’s no longer a civilization.

For a tool like a hammer, the technicals are in materials science, physics, and ergonomics.

The technicals on how to design an organization of people achieve an objective is: how “management” treats its “workers”. Organization. Policy.

“Culture”. “Teamwork”. “Quality”.

While these and similar ideas are shamelessly wielded by flagrantly distasteful people today, they are distasteful rather than silly because there is something valuable behind it. We know these are important. Somehow we know, even if we haven’t experienced it ourselves. Even if we can’t recall any specific example.

I now provide a specific example.

“The story of this factory is a famous one among car people–
it’s taught at business schools.”

In 1982, General Motors closed down its assembly plant in Fremont, California. At the time, GM was the world’s largest car company, and it closed down this plant because of its constant production problems. It was also manned by “the worst workforce in the automobile industry”. It wouldn’t be surprising if those words came out of GM, but they didn’t. Those words were from United Auto Workers, the union.

Drinking on the job, sex with hookers in the parking lot, average of one in four people not showing up on any particular day, deliberately sabotaging this or that part and whatever happens happens – and that’s just from the records available today. If you can imagine it, odds are, they probably did it.

Around that time, GM was having trouble with smaller cars. They had to build them due to government emission requirements, but those cars were always at a loss. Coincidentally, Toyota was also running into government issues. They were small, but rapidly gaining enough market share that Congress was pondering import restrictions. So Toyota was looking into building cars in the US. But they wanted some help. Toyota had only manufactured in Japan, specifically, in a city named after them: of their 16 plants in Japan today, 13 of them are in or near a city that changed their name to indicate the company’s local relevance.

Toyota looked to GM. Toyota would handle the factory side of things, GM would handle marketing and the rest; GM would learn how to make cars more cheaply, Toyota would get around import restrictions. For the plant, GM offered up Fremont Assembly. UAW for their part said they wanted the joint-venture to rehire the same people. Toyota agreed, and they ended up rehiring somewhere around 90%. Fremont Assembly was renamed to New United Motor Manufacturing Incorporated. It began production December 1984.

And the day NUMMI opened, the world’s best cars were coming down the line.

That’s not hyperbole.

NUMMI made cars at the Japanese standard, the highest standard, that is to say, way above GM’s. Number of man-hours spent per vehicle halved: it literally took half the manpower to make the same amount of stuff, and that stuff was made was better. In defects per hundred vehicles and basically any metric you can think of, there were similarly massive improvements.

And it was done with people who were drinking on the job and having sex with hookers in the parking lot. “Were”: they stopped doing that. They showed up, and they built cars. “Several told us they enjoyed coming to work for the first time.” The worst workforce was, suddenly, making the best cars anyone could find.

How did they do it?

“Several told us they enjoyed coming to work for the first time.”

They built better cars by changing how the people felt.

A car is made up of many parts, but aside from being a product made of metal, it is also a product of human emotions. Cars are built by men, and just as it was with the doctors who get no sleep, a man’s emotions is not an unrelated item to the outcome of his task.

When a car is moving down the assembly line at a rate of one a minute and the line is three miles long, no one knows exactly what is happening. No one worker can see all of what’s going on. No one manager can see all of what’s going on. No one mortal can see all of what is going on, even if he isn’t sitting down in an office in a different building. But each worker can see his part. And each worker further down the line has a chance to see some of the results of all the other workers that came before him.

If a worker doesn’t like his job, his team leader, the management, or just spilled his coffee that morning, he’s going to do a poorer job. Some of those actions may be said to be a result of intentional reasons, others, written off as “having a bad day”. But all of what they can do is within their thought space, and the thought space shifts based on emotions. Better emotions, better thought space. Better thought space, better results. If you feel a certain way, you will start seeing things that you wouldn’t if you felt another way. It doesn’t matter what a camera sees. It doesn’t matter what someone else sees. It matters what you see – in this case, what the worker sees.

Cars don’t get made in a car factory just because “that’s what car factories do”. Cars don’t work just because “they should”. All of those things come together, or don’t, due to human action. Human action is a result of human thought space. And human thought space is a result of, among other things, human emotion.

NUMMI imported the philosophy of Toyota, which stressed first and foremost the importance of continuous improvement and respect for people. In an organization, these two are the same thing: one is the cause, the other is the effect. People naturally want to perform well at their jobs. People want to do better every day. People especially don’t like making mistakes. But that’s working alone. With organizations, this also depends on how people treat each other.

All accounts of “labor-management relations” in Fremont Assembly describe it as “war”.

NUMMI put everyone on the same team.

The most famous symbol of the culture shift was the andon cord, “andon” being a loanword from Japanese now standardized due to NUMMI’s success. The andon cord is a cord above every worker’s station that, on a pull, would call a team leader over to help. If the team leader was unable to resolve the problem in time, or otherwise decided that it was serious, he would let the cord’s timer run out, and stop the entire line. Quality came first: that is to say, it was more important to get each car done right, than to get more cars done. Which led to more cars getting done, because errors weren’t being fixed later.

The andon cord was for the workers to catch errors. And the management supported the cord being pulled. They put it there. GM had red buttons that stopped the line too, but they were placed up to 75ft away. Walking 75ft is quite something when the line is moving at a car a minute. Its placement reflected its meaning: You weren’t supposed to push it. Sure, it’s there for a reason. There’s also a reason it’s all the way over there. Toyota replicated their own system at NUMMI brought the button within arm’s distance of everyone. It also was no longer a button, no longer something you had to look for specifically and hit it. Just reach up to the approximate height, and pull down: the point became a line. That placement and shape reflected its meaning, too.

Error-catching was part of a larger ideology.

Everyone was expected to inspect what they could in every car as they passed, solve problems, and note improvements that could be made – and in turn, management would do what they could to implement suggestions, make life easier, and make cars better. All things are built on technical implementation: this means that there’s always more details. Humans make mistakes. Machines make mistakes. Everyone and everything makes mistakes. “Mistake” simply means deviation from the idea in mind, which will always hyper-defined in one area and nebulous in the next. What we can do is do what we can now with what we have, and improve what we can the next time. In an organization, a continual project with multiple people working on multiple things, none of which are independent, this means “teamwork”. At some point in time, the andon cord didn’t exist. It, and many other things that we won’t go into here, was created because people thought and found it’d make doing things correctly, easier.

“People” – probably the worker doing it. The management and engineers listened, brainstormed some things together, and implemented a solution. While certainly there’s outside research going on in new materials, new aerodynamics, new more efficient engine design, the assembly and the running of a factory is technology that goes into the car too. All things are technology. All things can be improved.

Better cars are made by changing how people feel, change how people feel by putting them on the same team.

How did NUMMI put two sides of a “war” on the same team?

Same lunchroom. Same parking spaces. Division 1 classifications reduced from 80 to 1, skilled trades reduced from 18 to 2. Everyone on the line knows every other job on the line, everyone is allowed to do repairs. No seniority benefits. Organization was by teams rather than by skills. Bonuses for suggestions that get implemented. To counter drinking on the job, they even paid extra if you didn’t leave for lunch.

Before it opened, it flew all management and all 450 team leaders (about 1/5 of all line workers) to Toyota City for three weeks of training, including working on the line as a team member with the Japanese already familiar with the system and ideology. When it opened, and throughout its duration, Japanese management was present. They moved to California to oversee operations personally – including Tatsuro Toyoda, one of the founder’s grandsons.

It’s easy to say you care. It’s also easy to show you care.

It’s different to always and continuously go the extra mile because you give a shit.

That’s what GM didn’t do. They didn’t bother with the system behind it.

“Workers could only build cars as good as the parts they were given. At NUMMI, many of the parts came from Japan, and were really good. At Van Nuys, it was totally different.

The team concept stressed continuous improvement. If the team got a shipment of parts that didn’t fit, they were supposed to alert their bosses, who would then go to suppliers and engineers to fix the problem. All the departments in the company worked together.

But Ernie’s suppliers had never operated in a system like that. If he asked for fixes, they blew him off. And if he called Detroit and asked them to redesign a part that wasn’t working, they’d ask him why he was so special–

they didn’t have to change it for any other plant, why should they change it for him?”

“There was no vocabulary, even, to explain it. So I remember, one of the GM managers was ordered, from a very senior level– came from vice president– to make a GM plant look like NUMMI. And he said, “I want you to go there with cameras and take a picture of every square inch. And whatever you take a picture of, I want it to look like that in our plant. There should be no excuse for why we’re different than NUMMI, why our quality is lower, why our productivity isn’t as high, because you’re going to copy everything you see.”

Immediately, this guy knew that was crazy. We can’t copy employee motivation, we can’t copy good relationships between the union and management. That’s not something you can copy, and you can’t even take a photograph of it.”

“You had asked the question earlier, what’s different when you walk into the NUMMI plant? Well, you can see a lot of things different. But the one thing you don’t see is the system that supports the NUMMI plant. I don’t think, at that time, anybody understood the large nature of this system.

General Motors was a kind of throw it over the wall organization. You know, each department– we were very compartmentalized, and you’d design that vehicle, and you’d throw it over the wall to the manufacturing guys.

And they had to deal with it. And, I mean, you’re in there. You’ve kind of put your heart and soul into making this whole team concept work. And now you’re the messenger that has to go out and say, look, guys, even though this is the way the system’s supposed to work, and these are my issues, I’m not going to be able to solve them, and you’re going to have to deal with it.

And it was destructive. It was detrimental. I mean, no question about it.

You know, they never prohibited us from walking through the plant, understanding, even asking questions of some of their key people. I’ve often puzzled over that– why they did that. And I think they recognized, we were asking all the wrong questions. We didn’t understand this bigger picture thing.

All of our questions were focused on the floor, the assembly plant, what’s happening on the line. That’s not the real issue.

The issue is, how do you support that system with all the other functions that have to take place in the organization?”

When NUMMI opened, GM was seven times the size of Toyota.

That changed because Toyota paid attention to the problems of human technology: how to get organizations of people to treat each other, how to get individual people to believe the right things and act well on their own. It’s the result of taking human cooperation and human action space seriously. “Everyone” doesn’t exist, you and I do, and that means you and I need to do our part if “everyone” is going to achieve the objective.

This general concept behind “teamwork” is how you technically make people work together.

I use the phrase “make people” deliberately to illustrate an idea. It has a negative feeling to it. As if people are objects to be used and thrown away. But it’s important to keep that model in mind. People can be made to do things. People can be manipulated. A doctor that doesn’t get sleep will perform poorly. An assembly lineman who believes they can do better and will be supported by everyone from their foreman to the president will consistently try to find ways to exceed expectations. Humans have limits, limits mean there are certain properties, and properties can be manipulated with to create different results.

In an organization, these results are largely not a function of what you and I do. It’s not nothing. But it’s not everything. Organizations invariably have some kind of division of labor, a hierarchy, and idea behind it: a “culture”. A company culture, or a civilization’s culture, more or less rests on the shoulders of what the elite do. Do they just say things? Do they just do things? Or do they technically implement what’s necessary to get what they want?

GM had terrible human technology: Fremont Assembly made garbage cars.

Toyota had better human technology: NUMMI couldn’t stop getting quality awards.

“Maybe they don’t say explicitly “Don’t tell me,” but they discourage communication, which amounts to the same thing. It’s not a question of what has been written down, or who should tell what to whom; it’s a question of whether, when you do tell somebody about some problem, they’re delighted to hear about it and they say “Tell me more” and “Have you tried such-and-such?” or they say “Well, see what you can do about it” – which is a completely different atmosphere. If you try once or twice to communicate and get pushed back, pretty soon you decide, “To hell with it.””

One can say NUMMI treated the workers “more like human beings”. But that’s also just the opposite of the negative “make people work together”. They’re not wrong. They could be, that’s not important. What’s important is they’re not technical statements.

It wasn’t all sunshine and roses after Toyota took over day-to-day operations; one common complaint under the new system was favoritism. And so what? What was any worker going to do about that? Nothing. Or at least, close to nothing. Nothing that’d change the system. Nothing he could easily do would be equivalent to upper management descending from the heavens and smiting whoever was doing the thing in question.

Revolutionary rhetoric (and rhetoric reflects ideas) invariably has lines like, “If we all rose up tomorrow and” this or that or something or other. But “we” don’t exist. You and I exist. You know what kinds of things you and I will rise up tomorrow for? No water. No food. That’s called a riot. Beyond that, it’s not happening. There has never been and will never be a “we all rise up tomorrow”. Revolutions are always a result of extensive cooperation, usually coordinated by a small group, headed by an even smaller handful of people. Those people are called the elite. Revolutions are that way, corporations are that way, civilization is that way. And the rest of us largely do what they want, not because it’s right or wrong, it could be right or wrong, that’s not important, but because human action space exists. It’s implicitly admitted anyways: suppose something is bad. Why do we need to rise up? Why don’t you take care of it?

Because there are things you can and cannot do. There are places you can and cannot go.

It’s true of civilizations, it’s true of organizations, it’s true of you – and it’s true of your mind.

You can’t go just anywhere anytime with your mind. Remember that?

“It doesn’t matter what you know. It matters only what you can think of in time.”

Sleep, nutrition, emotions, what ideas you were raised with, what situations you’ve encountered, how other people treat you, what you want to do with your life: these influence what you can think of in time. And there is always a time. It takes time to think, it takes time to remember, it takes time to go to a friend for a second opinion and go even just, “oh yeah, I knew that”. The purpose of thinking, that is to say, envisioning how things works and what you are going to do in your next few steps, is to come to accurate conclusions quickly so the correct technicals can be enacted and get the results desired before the world has turned, and the situation has changed. Sometimes, it’s the wrong conclusion. Sometimes, bad technicals are used. Sometimes, there is no tomorrow, and the right answer arrives too late.

There exists a human cooperation space, a human action space, a human thought space – and each has their limits. In each, there are things you can and cannot do. There are places you can and cannot go.

“There are places you can and cannot go.”
There’s a “can”.

Where can you go? What can you change?

Well, there’s all the obvious stuff. Obvious doesn’t mean it’s therefore wrong.

Your business. Your team. Your family. Your room. One habit. A single good deed every day. Did you look into their eyes, stop for a moment, and say thank you? Did you pay attention to something you wanted to change for once and do something about it? Did you eat dinner at the table, making sure everyone was there? Did you find out something a teammate needed done, and do it for them? I don’t know anything about running a business, so I probably shouldn’t list any specific examples. But I could guess. You could too.

It’s not nothing. There’s something you can do.

There are outside influences too of course, from those on the situation to on your mind. But whatever control you have on your decisions – which isn’t nothing – is up to you. There are things you can do.

Industrialized society in the information age has a lot of rules and a lot of managing, but it’s not a monolith. It can’t control everything. It exists: therefore, it has limits. It thinks it doesn’t, and everyone thinks it doesn’t, and that’s why everything sucks. Not just the vast majority that the elite control, everything sucks. People think things should magically i.e. by invisible magic and naturally i.e. by the leaves of nature perform the way they’re supposed to, without a care in the world as to what they can and could do. So they do nothing. Or, they think you can do anything you want, all you have to do is put your mind to it, just start a multi-billion dollar business or run for office if you don’t like it so much, sum total of which, surprise, is absolutely nothing. Or, and this is the worst of the three, they believe “the truth is always somewhere in the middle”. As if you could take two things, any two things at all, and the best option is always to throw the two things into some fuzzy goodness-maker that does ????? and out comes exactly what’s perfect for the situation. It’s garbage. All of those are garbage. They’re dickwavers. They don’t tell you anything useful. They can’t even conceive of what it means to do something.

Where you can really go: depends on how you do it.

First, you’d need to believe the place exists.

You need to decide this place is somewhere you can go.

Then, you need an idea on what you’re going to do to get there. The technical implementation. “But how will I know?” That’s the wrong question. Start with what you know, the results are not the structure. Do what seems reasonable. It doesn’t have to be great. It doesn’t even have to work. It just has to do something you can already understand, and from there you get results and it can be improved. If you need to find a cable on the bottom of the ocean and all you have are sextants and a hook, that’s what you’re going to use.

Then it’s a matter of whether or not you happen to get there.

If you don’t get there, but can try again, then first you’d need to still believe it’s possible. Try changing up your technicals somehow. Then take another shot.

Of course, there’s also the possibility that you can’t try again, because you’re dead. Either literally dead, or lost hope, or decided it was impossible – any of these things informs action, namely, to stop, which means that it will no longer happen. If, for whatever reason, it comes to you, you wouldn’t be able to recognize it. It’s gone. Because you stopped believing in it, the place is no longer there.

There is a world outside of you, a world outside of your organization, a world out there outside of civilization. No one knows the future: no one knows what is going to happen next. We can make some guesses, some of them pretty good guesses. But no matter how good they are, they are 1) guesses, and 2) not actually the future. So they’re probably going to be wrong at one point or another. Once upon a time, Rome ruled the world. Then, it was Mongolia. Then it was Britain. Currently it’s the United States of America. Yesterday the biggest car company in the world was General Motors. Today, it’s Toyota.

Each time something changes, it was due to things that didn’t exist – until they did. They were causes that could’ve probably been found out, but “no one” believed them, and if you don’t believe in something, it doesn’t exist. And there’s always something you don’t believe in. That’s why there’s change.

It’s not wrong. That’s just how it is. Human thought space is limited. You have believe some things and not others, focus on some things and not others, if you are going to get anywhere. You can only think and know a few things. It’s impossible for anyone to know all what’s really going on in a civilization, in an organization, in a building, in their own mind. People can spend their whole life and not get a hold on a single one of those, let alone do all of it “in time”.

There’s always more things.

Always more unknowns. Always a greater, savage beyond.

What we can do is recognize where our knowns end and the unknowns begin.

What I can do is help you remember where your knowns end and the unknowns begin.


It’s easy to have the right idea. It’s hard to keep it.

Having the right idea is as simple as someone giving it to you. There are details there too, like discovering the person with the right idea to begin with, but more or less that’s as hard as it gets. All you need to do is hear or read it, and then you have it.

But you only have it for that moment. You may have spent a couple of minutes, a couple of hours, a couple of days, a couple of years, or even your whole life hearing about it. Some people go their whole lives without learning anything. Being given something means it can only stick for so much. There’s the time part: even if you’re a live-in apprentice, the master only spends an amount time with you. It’s some amount. It’s not like he’s actually there watching literally everything of every step of every second.

Then there’s the complexity. If you tell a kid that thing over there is a tree, what do they understand out of what you said and did? They could’ve seen the pose. They could’ve seen the forest. They could’ve seen the tree. Or, they might’ve seen the color green.

Let’s suppose that the master did actually hold your hand everywhere, did the parts for you, put food in your mouth for you, and so on. Imagine something like watching a livestream of someone’s life through their eyeballs, except you can also feel the heat, your muscles get exhausted from exertion, and all the other experiences in life. Suppose the master shows you literally everything. That still doesn’t mean you understand any of it, much less understand it the way they wanted you to understand it. The world is complicated, there’s an infinite number of moving parts. What parts relate to which other parts? How do they relate? How should they be simplified and understood? Words and experience can only point out a limited amount of things – the rest is up to you. There has never been an apprentice that fully copied his master, and if there was, and the next apprentice did the same, that’s where the tradition died. There are always more unknowns, and you have to constantly fill it in.

And you can only do things in your own way.

Keeping the right idea involves doing things your own way.

An idea is a piece of equipment. It has certain requirements, takes up a certain amount of space, and has certain uses. Your mind has some sort of environment to it; presumably, you’re familiar with a decent amount. That’s where all your other ideas/equipment are. If you are to keep an idea, your new equipment must integrate properly with all your other equipment. If you don’t integrate it, and instead put it “somewhere over there”, it’s probably going to get lost, and you’re going to forget it. It doesn’t mean it’s gone, it’ll just take a while to find it. That’s a “oh yeah, I knew that”.

How to integrate your new idea with your old ones is up to you. You could just jam it in and hope for best. You could find out that it does basically the same functions as one already existing, throw out the old one, make slight modifications and you’re set. It could turn out to be the case that, while it sounded nice, you picked up the idea for reasons you don’t really understand yet, you don’t really know how to integrate it, and you really do have to just put it “somewhere over there” for now.

The ideal case is the new idea fits neatly and easily into the old ones.

The ideal method of organization of ideas maximizes the ideal case.

How you organize ideas is an ideology.

Throughout this piece I have repeated myself a number of times. I did do some of it intentionally, most of it wording for rhetorical effect. The rest of it is because it’s what I found. I started off trying to understand the world, and everywhere I looked, this is what I found, connecting all the parts.

“All things are built on technical implementation”.
“Start with what you know, the results are not the structure”.
“Human thought space has certain properties”.
“It matters only what you can think of in time”.

It was true at the top level, it was true at the bottom level, it was true at every level in between – and more. There turned out to actually be a top level, civilization does actually stop at very obvious points. But the bottom turned out to not exist.

It’s easy to say people only have sight in a some-degree cone which can see to such-and-such size details at such-and-such distance, have hearing that can only detect this amount of pressure/decibels, beyond this it’s a matter of what they hear or read from other people etc.. But there was more than that. People don’t really know or control themselves either. Just because it’s in your vision cone doesn’t mean you see it. What you see depends on what you’re looking for, how well you’re looking for it depends on how you feel, and a whole number of other things, things that cannot be discounted.

And I knew all this. But that’s not the point. I never thought of it in time.

And suddenly, I was thinking of it in time. Suddenly, a single principle could toke me from the heights of what civilization can do all the way to the depths of a single man’s emotions. No longer was it this “physics” this and “psychology” that. No “well [that saying] is true but what about [this other saying]”, no “oh yeah, i knew that”, no “duh”. This was true everywhere I looked, and it took me anywhere I wanted. It covered everything that was possible to know, from the start of discovery, to the recall of memory.

It’s a transportation system across ideas, and it itself is an idea with the same properties.

It’s fractal.

Usually my problem with new ideas is I forget.

This idea was the opposite: I couldn’t stop seeing it.

I know that that means it’s better than a lot of the ideas that came before. But I also know that I will eventually stop seeing it everywhere. It has to be that way. People forget. People try out new things, and when trying out new things you have to, to some degree, let go of existing methods. There’s also all the things already discussed ad nauseum about the human thought space. Even now, there’s probably areas and things where I’m not actually applying the principle to, I just don’t know it.

For when I forget, I’ve come up with something that recalls the idea.

I felt the “think of in time” line could be improved. Like the red button vs the andon cord, it was invoking things in ways that weren’t as useful as they could be. Perhaps it’s because I really liked, read, and reread the books around the principle. Hagakure is a bunch of short stories and morals about honor, involving cutting down people like this or that. The Book of Five Rings – the actual source of the line – was huge chunks about the literal techniques on how you go about the swinging of the sword cutting down of people like this or that. Perhaps it’s because I’ve run into a bunch of “oh yeah I knew that” types, and I really don’t like invoking those kinds of people when trying to understand anything.

The line is a good line, for acting in the moment. And life is always in the moment. A very good line on which to build a decision theory. But the concept behind it can be used to do more.

Like make a map of the territory.

A map that recognizes that it is a map, and not the territory, and reminds you that when you go out into the territory, it’s more than you can ever see.

A good line recalling this concept needs to carry its fracticity. It’d need to talk about the qualities of what you know and what you don’t know, and how one becomes the other. It’d need to talk about you, in such a way that you’d naturally and willingly – you want to – insert yourself into the idea. It’d need to talk about how all knowns have limits and all unknowns have no limits, without doing things like inflating or squashing egos. It’d need to be short; long things are hard to remember. Preferably, it relies on as little technical knowledge as possible so it’s not field-specific, removing resistance against generally using it.

Preferable, it doesn’t rely on the words at all, but calls some image, with feeling, from instinct.

These and other similar conditions are ones I believe I have largely fulfilled. I’ll tell a short story now, but other than the first few paragraphs and unlike basically the rest of this piece, I didn’t plan what was going to be in it. I’ve never known an oral tradition, but I imagine it’s something like this: made of small yet important bits consisting of how to start and how to expand, and then expanding it.

I call it:

“A Mountain in the Jungle”




The jungle is the unknown. The jungle is endless. You can stop anywhere in the jungle, look at something, and the more you look, the more you will find. You can’t see very far; twenty steps any direction and it’s all different again. You have to be careful, or else you’ll get lost. And who knows what’s out there savoring for a taste.

The mountain is your home. There’s only one, but it’s high up, and it’s clear. When you’re on it, nothing can hurt you here. You still can’t see an end to the jungle. But at least here, all things are known. Everything works exactly like it should. And every day, you build the mountain, larger and taller. Up towards the sky.

The mountain has existed since before time began. You remember bits and pieces of the past, when the mountain was smaller here or there, but there was always a mountain, and you have always been building it.

Given that all you know how to do is build and how large the mountain is, it’s probably true that the mountain was started a long time ago. Your parents built it, your parents’ parent’s built it, all the way back, everyone was building. That’s your best guess, because you can’t talk to them about it. You can’t talk to anyone about it. You see many people on the mountain, usually they’re building it too, but they don’t know what you’re talking about. Occasionally they say some things that makes sense, most of the time it’s just words and sounds that don’t amount to anything. Once, every couple of ages, you happen to stumble upon someone in the jungle that seems to understand what you mean. But when you bring them back to the mountain, they don’t recognize that anything has changed. As far as they can tell, they’re still in the jungle. They say you must be tired and confused; they’ll bring you back to the *real* mountain. And once you’re supposedly there, you don’t see anything either. About the only things you can really talk about is what’s in the jungle. Which you both agree is very dangerous and full of things no one knows.

And the jungle is always expanding. Every day the jungle is expanding. It’s probably expanding out there somewhere too; as far as you’re concerned, it’s expanding up the mountain. Or the mountain is being eaten down by it. It’s hard to tell. It also doesn’t really matter, what matters is that the mountain gets smaller every day, unless you work hard chopping away at the jungle, go out for materials, and build the mountain higher. You’ll always remember the one time you decided to take a break, see what happens if you just don’t do anything. You stayed right on your spot on the mountain. How long it was isn’t clear anymore. What was clear: the jungle came up the mountain. Frighteningly fast. That was scary.

But some time later, you did it again. You forget why you did it, but you didn’t intend to do it. It might’ve been overexertion after building too hard for too long, might’ve been going on a long journey and failing to find a new place to mine for stone and other materials, might’ve been that one time you followed some guy who said he’d show you a new plant and got lost for a while trying to come home. In any case it happened again.

That time, you decided to measure it.

You placed a few rocks where the mountain stops and the jungle starts. It’s not clear where exactly the boundary is, but it’s as good as you can make it. Did nothing that day, checked back tomorrow, sure enough it was in the jungle now. But it wasn’t gone. The rocks were still there. And it wasn’t that far either. Just a few paces. Did the same thing again, waited another day (that day you remember – you played with really pretty butterflies) and again the rocks are still there. The rocks from the first time are still there too, though toppled over and spread out a bit. Maybe some animal tripped over it? But where they were was just a few paces from yesterday’s rocks, which in turn was about the same few paces from the mountain – and more importantly, the same number of paces you found the first time!

It was a revelation:

The jungle could be known.

Or at least, its border with the mountain could be known. And approximately which way from where the sun rises relative to the mountain you get your building materials, which in turn was about this way from where you got water, and… hmm.

You tell some people about it, most responded in their usual basket of assorted syllables, the rest, as far as you could tell, said, “you are crazy”.

Nevertheless, you start getting ideas.

You do it over and over again (not all back to back; have to keep clearing the jungle and finding food and all the other things) and every time, you find the same result. Well, almost every time. The usual amount is such-and-such number of paces per day. Sometimes it’s a bit more, sometimes it’s a bit less. One time you tried measuring by finger lengths instead to be more accurate, and that worked too. But every once in a while a tree falls down and it expands faster for a while, and sometimes for reasons you couldn’t quite figure out it expanded slower. It was more easy to screw up the finger measurement, and the pace count was about right anyways. Such-and-such number of paces per day. Assuming the sun crossed the sky in the same amount of time every day. And you’re the same size. Seemed like safe enough assumptions. The number of paces wasn’t always the same, but it wouldn’t off by very much, and when it was, there was also usually something obvious that showed why it had changed.

One day you decide to do something different.

You decide you’ll clear a path to the mine.

(Or was it the river?)

You reason, perhaps rather than just clearing the mountain, perhaps other things could be cleared too. Yesterday trying to get a lot of berries you cleared a fairly large area in the middle of nowhere, and, today, when you finally found it again… it was there. It had shrunk, the jungle expanded here at a rate somewhat differently than back home. But it didn’t just disappear. Or at least, you think you found it. It’s probably the same patch though, it was in this direction about this amount of time’s walk from the mountain.

The sun is great and all, but sometimes it’s cloudy, and sometimes, you don’t wake up until the middle of the day. If only you could see in the jungle like you could on the mountain… then there wouldn’t need to be any wondering about where to go, and how to get back. If it’s a straight path, anywhere on the path there’s only two ways to look, one of them is going to be the mountain. If it’s not a straight path, then at least there’s a guide, again with two directions, and one of them is going to head to the mountain.

And it worked. Or it did, after some adjustments.

As discovered earlier, the jungle expanded differently out here, some places really fast, and that meant that some paths were simply not viable. While one place worked just fine with a straight path, most others needed to include a number of funny turns and workarounds. You didn’t know where to go to get around the problem beforehand, but you knew there was a problem, and you knew where it was you needed to go, so you tried this or that and eventually one would get through. Usually. Sometimes it was too much of a bother and there’d just be a patch of jungle inbetween.

For a few of them that were too far, you eventually decided to just build mini-mountains instead. And why not? You know how to build a mountain, the jungle has some height; building a small mountain, one that’s tall enough to see straight from the one back home sort of serves the same purpose. Would still need to trek through the jungle, but it could save a lot of trouble. Smaller mountains have a smaller area that needs to be maintained, which also means a shorter amount of time required to climb and build…. it seemed like a good idea. And for some of them, it was. Others, it just didn’t happen. Tree canopies happened to be too tall, jungle expanded abnormally fast, too far from the mines; the reason was different for each.

But some paths were cleared. And some new mountains were made.

And of course, the real meat and the original objective:

Your mountain is bigger and better than ever.

Some people believe it. Most people don’t. They all seem to make more sense now… maybe something to do with all the new things you’ve been doing? Fewer grunts and yells, more comprehensible signals. It’s still not really how you’d do things, when they say some word they usually don’t mean what you say it to mean, but you’ve gotten more accurate at guessing what they’re saying. And that’s better than before.

Those random guys that came around once every forever, some of them see your mountain now. And you see some of theirs, too – one day they just popped out, like they’ve been there the whole time. You’re able to discuss how to build this or that part, this or that way, this or that material. There’s also those mini-mountains, some of which people have started clearing and building themselves. A couple of them have gotten quite large. So have some of your paths, which some of the people you try to talk to insist are mountains. They could see what was going on for such a long way – how could they possibly be in the jungle?

Just the same – some of your creations could not survive.

As some got built, others got destroyed. The faster you built, the faster some died. On rare occasion you’d see someone take material from one mountain to build another, but often it just disappeared – you’d follow them in the jungle and then at some turn, they’d be gone. It was as if people were making the jungle grow faster than normal.

As if people were becoming the jungle themselves.

Where you could get an answer, through as best you could figure out whatever symbols and sounds they used to mean, they would always say the same thing. As you asked more and more, it turned out, it really didn’t change, whether it was someone who was building or destroying. Now, as you harken back, back when it was just one mountain in the jungle, you remember and see, they have always been saying the same thing:

“I’m building the mountain.

What are you doing?”




Epilogue / References and Other Rulesets

All things have a domain. This is where the domain of this piece ends.

In college I once asked an English grad student a question. She was the TA for the writing class I was in, which covered stuff I learned in fifth grade. At some point it was mandatory to make an appointment with the TA to discuss our writing or something, and I wanted to come up with something to impress her (she was hot. those were some big titties). Something good has to be something I was interested in and knew something about. My problem around that time was I didn’t know when to stop writing. The question I asked was, I forget the words, but it was something along these lines:

“A thesis is supported by an essay. An essay is supported by paragraphs. Paragraphs are supported by concrete details. Presumably, concrete details are supported by further concrete details.

How far down am I supposed to go?”

She failed to give me a good answer.

And I continue to have that problem today.

My first iteration of this piece went 17,500 words in the wrong direction. This piece is written in a file titled “setup6d” (there’s also about that many “collection” .txt’s), and I had a lot planned for this final section. But it’d be too long. Length matters. It’s “all related”, but these technical details matter. So it’s time to stop. It’s time to pull up the hook.

And all the miles of rope.

Over the years, I’ve come to understand a little more about the nature of the problem.

Ever since I started taking drawing seriously, many things not in drawing have simply revealed themselves to me. Drawing is spatial, and I have always thought spatially. “I have always thought spatially” is currently in words, but I didn’t discover that until I took drawing seriously. “Taking [anything] seriously” too. Etc., ad infinitum. Basically anything regarding learning, I learned through drawing. And all things have to be learned – learning just means “input”. Which for me makes sense if I think of it as “seeing”. That’s why all examples I used highlight seeable things.

Drawings can be measured into correctness. You know that one pose artists in movies do? The holding up of a pencil? That’s measuring. This amount of space on the pencil is this amount of space as it appears in reality. You don’t need to know what the ruler says, just how big this looks in proportion to that. Plus or minus 10% is fine, so long as it’s the right 10% – choose what you’re measuring and in what order wisely. Art may be harder to grasp, but drawing is a technical skill. You need eyes, hands, a pencil, and paper: the rest is followthrough.

When I started, all I did was measure.

But one time, I measured my way into something better than the original. It looked good, I overlayed it with the picture I was copying from, but it didn’t match. Traced the lines myself, overlayed with the measured version, still didn’t match. But one was obviously better than the other. My eyes weren’t lying. Photoshop wasn’t lying. And one was better than the other. So the measured one had to be better. That was a breakthrough. That gave me confidence.

Obviously real artists don’t measure everything. That’s not what they do. But that doesn’t matter. Measuring is extremely slow; that doesn’t matter either. What matters is results. And doing something I could do, doing something I understood, I made better results.

“Something I can do and I can understand can make better results.” That was the breakthrough.

I called it,

“Capturing the Essence”.

I never encountered anything that worked like that for writing. In drawing I not only learned how to draw, I learned how to export learning to other things. Now, I at least think of writing as something that can be improved, a skill that exists independently of any ideas that are talked about inside. Make this section longer, make that section shorter, rearrange the sections, change that word out for one that’s more memorable, change that word out for a couple of sentences that would smooth things out… and so on.

Does that make for better writing? I imagine it does. I hope it does. Taste I couldn’t really port over. I couldn’t port over tracing either. Nor my lack of care for intricate detail.

But I do have some taste, here and there. Including one for bibliographies.

I have a taste for bibliographies.

I think saying the purpose of bibliographies is “to prevent plagiarism” is absolutely insulting.

A trick that can only be played on children. No, that insults children, I should be more specific: people with no understanding of the world. It’s the same trick with intellectual property. “If someone has done it before you need to give them credit”. Question: How am I going to know that? How are you going to know that? I’m going to search the whole library to see if someone did it before me? What if the library’s incomplete? What if the Library of Congress is incomplete? And it is incomplete. Even the Library of Alexandria was incomplete. Even 10,000 pages of Google is incomplete, and you’re not going to look past the first 10. Everything is a mountain in the jungle, and the jungle is infinite. Trying to find out if something has been done before you, ever, anywhere, is trying to search the entire jungle. You can’t do it. You are being sent on an impossible task. To make it exceedingly clear: You are being fucked with.

Plagiarism is really about who’s going to come after you for not giving them credit. That is to say: it’s about “who”. It’s power. If you’re small and they’re big, they can take whatever they want and claim it’s theirs. They can even claim they did it first and you stole from them (search: art plagiarism). If you’re really small though, you can take whatever you want, because no one cares about you. No one even sees you. In academia, we see the end goal of this anti-plagiarism device meets perfect information: citations absolutely everywhere. Everyone knows everyone, and everyone is looking for a slice. Names and titles and dates everywhere, every sentence, clogging up the flow of the actual stuff. It’s ugly.

I’m a nobody so it doesn’t matter. I do what I want.

I largely can’t be bothered because citations eat up my time: any time and energy I spend looking into who said what is time I’m not spending doing and finding out new things. All thinking, plus or minus, cites all the way back to the Buddha or Socrates. Guess who the Buddha and Socrates cited? And we want to be like those two guys, right? Not the academics?

It doesn’t matter if someone else found it before me (especially not if I don’t know who did it), I didn’t do it so I don’t get it, and when I do it it’s new to me. The most common thing is people say things that are too vague, the less common but still frequent case is they say things that are obscure; anything that is useful to me I’ve basically had to do myself anyways. So either I spend energy figuring out what people are talking about, and then do it myself, or, I just do it myself. It’s usually not a very hard choice.

But I like bibliographies.

Bibliographies help me remember things.

Other than being spatially gifted/verbally impaired, I have a really terrible memory. The primary reason why I wrote all this and do any thinking is because I can’t remember jack squat. Normal people with good memories, I imagine, are just fine with a bunch of disparate pieces of information. That’s presumably why they enjoy that trivia stuff so much. But I can’t do that. I can hold only a few things. So I need to hold the best few things. As it turns out, there are different types of things, and this type is better than the rest, because it is a single thing yet also multiple things. It requires thinking to produce, and is usually called a “principle”.

“Ideology” is what I’ve called a principle of principles. It’s usually called “epistemology”, but I don’t like that word too much. I like the sound of the word “ideology”. And I can see what it is: idea, logic. Logic of ideas. What the heck is an “epistem”? But back to book-graphing.

Good ideas are not randomly distributed. Someone who’s had a good idea before is likely to have a good idea again; someone who’s had multiple good ideas before is more likely to have good ideas in the future. The world is really big and there’s a lot of ways to see about and think around it. You can only see and do so much yourself. It’s nice to have people who you can use to do additional thinking for you and run into real problems “beforehand”. There’s still the minimum reverse-engineering and implementation costs stated earlier, and it is pretty hard to find someone who’s not just being deliberately obscure (for dickwaving purposes) – but that’s why bibliographies are great! Once you’ve found one good thinker, if he has a bibliography, it significantly increases your chances of finding more good thinkers.

As for the creation side of it, naming sources helps me remember the lineage of ideas.

Lineages are something that turns the dots of ideas into lines: it’s another type of principle.

Some lineages are very important. You need to know who said it and what it was used with etc. to figure something out. Other lineages basically don’t matter and external factors could be rederived offhand. I think it’s rather good practice to keep at least a couple of notes on lineage of each thing around. It tells you where the minimum domains on the things are: “at least according to this guy”.

This section, apart from the bibliography, was originally going to be more detail about me. All things have domains; “of course [A Mountain In The Jungle] is my opinion, it came out of my mouth“. But what do I mean to you? Earlier when I said I wrote 17,500 words in the wrong direction: that was an autobiography. Mostly about the two months that were the primary impetus for this idea. But I don’t think the particular details of that are important anymore. The final theory survives just fine without it – as it was intended to. As for what purpose that served, that is to say, giving you some idea about me, I think what actually appeared in this section is sufficient. More than enough self-referential stuff.

Okay, maybe a bit more. Since I have written them already.

I picked some fights at the beginning. Here are a few of their illustrations before the end.

Utopia/Equalists: They will say you can’t separate people into different groups.

Equality is mostly a useless concept.

Equal enough isn’t, but then it gets into details, technical details, which these people don’t want to talk about. Is it IQ? There’s literal apes with no whites in their eyes that have higher IQ than some africans and aborigines. “Can function in society” If you ask me, 10x the murder rate and (infinity)x the riot-and-loot-stores rate is a disqualifier. “You’re just a racist” You will find that anyone you ask, from any angle, once you get down to these technicals, will have a different answer for what is equal enough. It’s a fact of life that different things are different. It only becomes a pressing problem when you emphasize this impossibility. That’s why non-“racists” have the “the progressive stack”: they’re always finding more inequalities.

The technicals will get you eventually.

The jungle will get its fair share.

Here’s the bottom line for me: children born from the same parents, raised in the same household, and fed the same food, turn out different. Even the lengths of your fingers are different. Suppose equality is good and you have infinite power (which, I’ll remind you, you don’t). Is it good enough to change that? Go in there and replace parents with government employees? Finger surgeries for everyone? I don’t think equality is good enough for that. I don’t think it’s good enough for basically anything. There’s science men on TV who like to say things like “we’re all made of the same star stuff”. Are you going to start treating cabbages like people? Equalists don’t even treat racists like people, let alone cabbages (which they tend to treat more poorly than cows/chicken/pigs/fish, also made of “star stuff”). Granted, they’ve recently stopped eating cabbages and started eating “Soylent”. That just makes my opinion easier.

Equality is mostly useless.

Using useless things in important and critical ways will get you the obvious results.

Bigotry/Womanism: They will say you can’t think things because someone might feel bad.

I once passed by Forever21 fairly regularly. Forever21 is a women’s clothing store, presumably the idea is wearing their clothes will keep you forever 21. Now one day I was passing it a thought occurred to me,

“When does a lady become a woman?”.
Or maybe it was “When does a girl become a lady?”.

The answer came fairly quickly: It’s long after it’s already happened. Thirty year old females are girls. Then they’re ladies, and have been ladies since they were twenty. Sixty year old females are ladies. Then they’re women, and have been since they were forty. They are whatever they say they are, whenever they say it. Which naturally extends to: things are whatever they say they are, whenever they say it, and whenever they change their minds. I wasn’t able to truly generalize this at the time. But this was also before the current iteration of MeToo and Rolling Stone.

These people are very skilled manipulating your thought space. And the less in control you are of your thought space, the less understanding you will have of what’s going on, the higher the probability you are going to help cause results you are not going to like. There’s a reason why the Greeks made up the concept of Sirens.

Keep your wits about you around these types. Choose your actions wisely.

They don’t have your best interests in mind.

NAXALT/ESID/Platonism: They will say you are wrong because you are not perfectly consistent.

ESID is a version of NAXALT used among those who move to Japan to teach English. ESID stands for “Every Situation Is Different”, and it’s used to remind people that, whatever idea they had about Japan before, whatever they had heard, isn’t therefore going to apply to them. NAXALT is fairly popular, “Not All [X] Are Like That”; generalized version of “Not All Women Are Like That”.

I believe the purpose of ideas is to help gain understanding about the world. So, NAXALT/ESID, if it’s a good idea, helps expand understanding. Start with principle, find exception, re-evaluate new possible general case, expand principle.

I ran this idea backwards and I found it didn’t work.

It just permanently destroys principles.

We’ve already done race and women, so let’s use this travel one this time.

Suppose you moved to Japan. You don’t move to “Japan”, you move to a house on such-and-such street in such-and-such city, probably with people to help you with everything being Japanese, and a job doing such-and-such things with Japanese clients… you get the idea. Suppose you do that for a day. ESID, you don’t know everything. Fine. What can you know in a day.

But no matter what you do, it’s the same result.

A week. ESID. A month. ESID. A lifetime. ESID. You know what it means to live in that house, that street, etc.. What about another house on a different street? A different city, a different province? A different job, seeing different people, being in different networks? ESID, ESID, ESID. You can’t say Japan means this or that because ESID. You’re just talking about you.

Someone else though can say things about Japan, because ?????, then it’s not ESID.

“But I wouldn’t say things like that, I’d say it’s because you hadn’t” Exactly.

The jungle is infinite. We can’t clear the jungle. We can build the mountain.

So build the mountain.

All you need to do is keep track of who’s saying what, and know that all these limits also apply to the other guy. If someone says you can’t say something about your experience in Japan, just know he has some background too.

Studies/Experts/Numericism: They will say you need the fancy letters and tabled numbers.

I fucking hate science.

“Exact science” isn’t an exact science. Even rocket science isn’t rocket science. I would know, I’ve taken some rocket science. There’s some really fucking inane shit in there. “But you haven’t taken all of rocket science” Fuck you.

For example, they have tables for making decisions. That sounds neat you say, make decisions as objective as possible. But tables aren’t magic. All things are built on technical implementation. Tables only say what you fill them with, and you can only fill them with what you have ideas for. What do rocket scientists know about decisions? Not much more than you, because our philosophical tradition doesn’t take decisions seriously, it only talks about “facts”. Rocket scientists know plenty about tables, but when they have to measure the importance of having this feature versus that feature or measuring budget against quality, guess what they do? They say this feature has an importance of 0.3 and that feature has an importance of 0.5.

How did they do that?

It felt that way.

No really, that’s the extent of it. Experienced or not, they pulled it out of their ass, and if the tables end up saying something they don’t want, they change the tables or the numbers until it says what they want it to say. Which is invariably going to happen because people don’t feel or think about those things in fucking numbers. At which point you might as well have just chosen something “subjectively” the first time and written an essay instead. But no. It has to be science. Which means it has to look like science. Which means dickwaving tables.

Doctors are the same way. “On a scale from 1 to 10, how much pain are you feeling?” My chin is detached from my skull and blood is spilling from my hands, what the fuck do you think? Am I talking to someone? Is this a person? Hello in there??

Human thoughts and experience don’t fit perfectly in numbers, believe it or not. They don’t fit perfectly in words either. There may be uses framing things this way or that, but how they’re framed is of utmost importance. And no one pays attention to this.

In highschool AP Statistics the first time p-values were brought up, I asked, “What does it mean to be 95% confident?”. No good answer. Then I was told to assume things are normally distributed, and I asked, “Why would we assume things are normally distributed?”. No good answer. I got the department award for statistics that year. Perhaps that was a coincidence. Perhaps getting a 5 on the AP test was also a coincidence. I wouldn’t know. I still don’t take statistics seriously.

Or maybe, I take it seriously, and no one else does.

But words mean what people use them to mean, and people use science and statistics etc. to mean ^that kind of shit, and I have no particular attachment to the word, so if that’s the name the enemies desire, that’s the name they will get.

Management/Authoritarianism: They will say you don’t know all the details.

They don’t know all the details either.

Transatlantic cable, SR-71, ABMs, battleships, NUMMI…

Actually, let’s wrap those two big stories up.

The Transatlantic Cable eventually became part of a greater system. The British Empire repeated the feat, pulling a cable across Canada, the Pacific Ocean, Australia, Hong Kong, Singapore, India, South Africa, and back to the homeland. The system was completed, half a century later in 1911, and was called, “The All Red Line“.

In World War 1, British worldwide communications went uninterrupted.

German connections were cut immediately.

NUMMI produced the world’s best cars until 2010.

In 2009, after nearly three decades of failing to improve its quality and under the 2008 recession, General Motors filed for bankruptcy. Among other things, it pulled out of the NUMMI joint venture with Toyota. NUMMI had a no-layoff policy, one that it demonstrated its commitment to shortly after opening in 1987 and 1988, when slowed production and slowed sales meant 264 workers were technically not needed. Most of the workers were assigned to “kaizen” projects.

Kaizen is another japanese loanword made famous here, meaning “continuous improvement” (“改善”, lit. “change line”). Kaizen was the philosophy of Toyota and NUMMI: everyone can always improve. It was the philosophy my dad taught me. My dad worked at NUMMI. I’ve heard the song of kaizen since before I could speak.

Toyota offered to keep NUMMI open in exchange for some pay cut. I forget the number, but it was a rate that, as my dad said, if anyone had heard about it at the time, “everyone would raise their feet in agreement”. But UAW was “the sole bargaining agent for the NUMMI labor force” by the original contract.

And UAW wanted more.

Toyota pulled out, and opened a few more elsewhere in the country. NUMMI was the first time Toyota had closed down a factory in its 70+ years of existence.

From a business perspective it wasn’t particularly a good idea to begin with. Toyota didn’t specifically need to do a joint venture – at the time, such a thing was unheard of. It was big news. Apparently one headline announcing it read, “Hell Freezes Over”. Especially using a plant known to be sin city. But they did it. Because they wanted to, in their words, learn what working with Americans would be like. It was about learning. After thirty years and now running multiple plants in the country, perhaps they decided they had learned enough.

And yet, they gave huge severance packages.

Every year you worked there, you got one week’s pay. On top of some amount of bonus. And 20,000$ cash – to buy health insurance while you look for your next job.

No one got a penny when GM closed Fremont Assembly down.
Hell, no one got a penny from GM when it pulled out of NUMMI either.

Toyota also did some things under the table – “They told me, “What we are talking about now is not in black in white. There will be no records of this. You talk about this to no one. Not your boss, not your coworkers, not even your wife””. One by one they went behind closed doors with that man in the suit and talked about ?????. (The water cooler ran out a lot that day.) I have no qualms talking about it, but my dad said not to, so out of respect for him I’m cutting out most of it. But I think the concept of it is important. You can guess what was occurring, a hook off the back is mostly sufficient.

The end result: Some people took it. Some people didn’t.

My dad didn’t.

Toyota gave it anyways.

Straight Up Lying/Journalism: They will fabricate things simply to contradict you.

Fake news is not a problem. I have long since learned not to take them seriously. I keep track of who says what, and if anything comes from “CNN”, or “NBC”, or anyone of the fourth estate, I know what that information means. It’s not a problem.

Does it cause problems? Yes. But it’s a known quantity. I know what to do with it.

In this case: minimize my exposure to it.

All this discussion about how you need to give us a second chance, we check our facts now, you’re taking things out of context, when things are always changing there’s bound to be mistakes, our job is hard, blah blah blah. I don’t care. I could care. But that’s clearing out the jungle. That’s called buying Hanlon’s razor. That’s called not learning your Aesop’s fables. When have these guys shown they cared? Do you know what happens when you turn your back to the enemy?

NUMMI and some other jungles are fun to look around in; this one just sucks. It fucking sucks. There’s not a single thing I can point to like with NASA, “oh we had to time our mars landing at exactly the right moment” fuck you, it takes 7 minutes for a signal to even reach mars and “exact” is a measurable amount of time, either larger than 7×2 minutes (data signal here, command signal back), in which case, fuck you, or it’s smaller than 7×2 minutes, in which case, you’re trying to trick me, fuck you. I’d be amazed if you just told me what kinds of difficulty you were dealing with instead of directly talking about how big your dick was. But journalism is worse. There’s no reference point. Or rather, there’s infinite reference points. And it is all dicks.

Easier to just tell them to go fuck themselves. Which achieves approximately the intended results anyways, and results are what matter. Only people who don’t like it are journalists.

Who can go fuck themselves.

Bootstraps/Americanism: They will imply only the lazy embark on your endeavor.

These are the kinds of people who say things like, “If you don’t like Amazon or Facebook or Google, why don’t you start your own business?”. Or, “I pulled myself up by my bootstraps, I paid my own way through college working part-time in the summer”.

I hope I’ve impressed upon you by now what the problem with this is.

More importantly, I hope I’ve impressed upon you now how its solution begins.

I’d like to do more. I could go on forever.

But I have other things I want to do.

And you have an approximate idea. So long as you know about where to look, have the some resources, and you start looking, you’ll get approximately what you want.

Throw a hook off the back.
Start with what you know, the results are not the structure.
All things are built on technical implementation.
There are things it can and can’t do; there are places it can and can’t go.

Start with the proposition:

So long as you attempt to understand the world, it can be understood.


I

“Mastery does not normally cross fields.

Epistemology is the exception. Every field of inquiry involves epistemology.”

Alrenous

II

“There are at least three psychological reasons for why most people are deterred from finding the true theory of history. The first is that the vast majority of people only have an implicit theory of history.

(Which is to say: most people do not even have the concept of a theory of history.)

Here’s the problem with relying on your implicit theory of history: it’s wrong, without a doubt. The world is complex, and your theory of history has to explain how everything in the world works. So, without explicitly trying to improve your theory of history, there is no hope: there will be countless things that you have not had the time or the psychological freedom to take into account. Improving your theory of history implicitly is not systematic enough to work.”

On Building Theories of History
Samo Burja

“One of my favorite stories about my wife and myself, when we were in New Jersey, our breakfast table was right next to some windows looking on the garden. We’re having breakfast prior to me going to work. And she says, “Dick, it’s raining.” I look at her and think “What’s wrong with her? She must know that I can see it’s raining”. Then I say to myself, what did she really say?

What she said was: “I’ve had my second cup of coffee and I’m fit to talk to.”

I spent much of that day at Bell Labs watching how much of what we say is not what it appears to be. And it is amazing. The enormous amount of how much of what we say is literally not correct. No way. So the language has a great deal of thing of things more than what you think; our natural language has a great deal of features, which in a language to a computer would not have to have.

Well we have not studied the problem. When I heard the Japanese were planning to write fifth generation computers, the speed was alright, but when they were going to do AI to do things, I thought they would not succeed. And they didn’t. Because they were not profoundly studying the nature of language. And until we do, we will get language like ADA, which are logically alright, but they don’t fit the human analogue to do the kinds of things that a human animal does with language.

Now I point out there are two languages: there is you to the machine, and the machine back to you. They need not be the same language. You want a terse one in, and you’re willing to put up with a rather verbose one coming out. Frequently what comes out is so terse you can’t figure out what it means, and you’re willing to settle with a lot more printout – but not too much. It’s a problem of designing language to communicate ideas to machines.

But unfortunately we don’t know what ideas are, so we don’t know how to do it.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

“The story of this factory is a famous one among car people-
it’s taught at business schools.”

This American Life #561: NUMMI 2015
Ira Glass

III

“There isn’t really a problem of induction.

There really is a problem of intentionality. How the fuck do things refer to other things?”

Alrenous

“Suppose you have two theories, A and B. Both completely different psychologically, different ideas and so on. But all the consequences they computed are exactly the same. They may even agree with the experiments. The two theories, although they sound different at the beginning, have all the consequences the same. […] Suppose we have two such theories: how are we going to decide which one is right?

No way. Not by science. Because they both agree with experiments there’s no way to distinguish one from the other. So two theories, although they may have deeply different ideas behind them, may be mathematically identical, and usually people say then in science ‘one doesn’t know how to distinguish them’. And that’s right.

However, for psychological reasons, in order to get new theories, these two things are very far from equivalent. Because one gives a man very different ideas than another. By putting a theory in a certain kind of framework you get an idea what could change. Which in theory A would talk about something, you say I’ll change that idea here, but to find out what corresponding things you’re going to change in B could be very complicated. It may not be a simple idea. In other words, a simple change here makes maybe a very different theory than a simple change there. In other words, although they are identical before they’re changed, there are certain ways of changing one which look natural, which don’t look natural in the other. Therefore psychologically, we must keep all those theories in our head. Every theoretical physicist that’s any good knows six or seven different theoretical representations for exactly the same physics, and knows that they’re all equivalent, and that nobody is ever going to be able to decide which one is right – at that level – but he keeps them in his head, hoping that they’ll give him different ideas.”

The Character of Physical Law
Richard Feynman

“There has to be an answer. You must not doubt that.

If you can’t believe that, why don’t you cry yourself to sleep, and then just give up and die?”

EVA-Beatrice
Umineko no Naku Koro Ni Chiru: End of the Golden Witch

IV

“There was no vocabulary, even, to explain it. I remember one of the GM managers was ordered from a very senior level– it came from a vice president– to make a GM plant look like NUMMI. And he said, I want you to go there with cameras and take a picture of every square inch. And whatever you take a picture of, I want it to look like that in our plant. There should be no excuse for why we’re different than NUMMI, why our quality is lower, why our productivity isn’t as high, because you’re going to copy everything you see.

Immediately, this guy knew that was crazy. We can’t copy employee motivation. We can’t copy good relationships between the union and management. That’s not something you can copy, and you can’t even take a photograph of it.”

Jeffrey Liker
This American Life #561: NUMMI 2015

“Managers tend to believe that if they only knew what was going on, they would know what to do.

It’s called micromanagement.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

“The foreman, Mr. Fichtel, said he wrote a memo with this suggestion to his superiors two years ago, but nothing had happened yet. When he asked why, he was told the suggestion was too expensive.

“Too expensive to paint four little lines?” I said in disbelief.

They all laughed. “It’s not the paint; it’s the paperwork,” Mr. Fichtel said. “They would have to revise all the manuals.”

The assembly workers and other observations and suggestions. They were concerned that if two rocket sections scrape as they’re being put together, metal filings could get into the rubber seals and damage them. They even had some suggestions for redesigning the seal. Those suggestion weren’t very good, but the point is, the workers were thinking! I got the impression that they were not undisciplined; they were very interested in what they were doing, but they weren’t being given much encouragement. Nobody was paying much attention to them. It was remarkable that their morale was as high as it was under the circumstances.

Then the workers began to talk to the boss who had stayed. “We’re disappointed by something,” one of them said. “When the commission was going to see the booster-rocket assembly, the demonstration was going to be done by the managers. Why wouldn’t you let us do it?”

“We were afraid you’d be frightened by the commissioners and you wouldn’t want to do it.”

“No, no”, said the workmen. “We think we do a good job, and we wanted to show what we do.””

What Do You Care What Other People Think?
Richard Feynman

“While this is THE classic book on lean production […] They give short-shrift to the real key.

The original researcher for this study was John Krafcik (he later became the President and CEO of Hyundai Motor America). In his own report of the data he pointed out that the skills and motivation of the work force has the greatest explanatory power of assembly plant performance.

Yet this is given remarkably little attention in this book. Had the authors look beyond the automobile assembly even as nearby as the turnaround at Harley Davidson this focus on people might have gotten much more attention. In the case of Harley, there was no way to miss that the key was the people in every factory floor function.

Get the people environment right, and everything else will sort itself out.”

Bill B.
Amazon reviews for “The Machine That Changed the World”

“One thing I really like about the Toyota style is that they’ll put in a machine to save you from bending down. The Toyota philosophy is that the worker should use the machine and not vice versa. Not like some of these plants you read about where it’s automation for automation’s sake.

I visited a plant a while back – they had robot sealer guns but they also had workers who had to check that the robots had done it right and to redo it manually when the robots screwed up. It would be fine if the robots worked perfectly – and the engineers always seem to imagine they will. But they don’t and so the worker ends up being used by the machine.

At NUMMI, we just put in a robot for installing the spare tire – that really helps the worker, because it was always a hell of a tiring job. It took a while, and we had to raise it in the safety meetings and argue about it and then do some kaizen. But they knew. They understood. And they came through. Same thing with installing batteries – they put in a machine to help the worker do a better job. That would never happen at GM-Fremont – you never saw automation simply to help the worker.”

George Nano
The ‘Learning Bureaucracy’
Paul S. Adler

“Maybe they don’t say explicitly “Don’t tell me,” but they discourage communication, which amounts to the same thing. It’s not a question of what has been written down, or who should tell what to whom; it’s a question of whether, when you do tell somebody about some problem, they’re delighted to hear about it and they say “Tell me more” and “Have you tried such-and-such?” or they say “Well, see what you can do about it” – which is a completely different atmosphere. If you try once or twice to communicate and get pushed back, pretty soon you decide, “To hell with it.””

What Do You Care What Other People Think?
Richard Feynman

“Ted Holman, a Team Leader in the body shop, argued this way:

“I don’t think IEs are dumb. They’re just ignorant. Anyone can watch someone else doing a job and come up with improvement suggestions that sound good. But they don’t usually take into account all the little things that explain why, from the worker’s point of view, they couldn’t work. And it’s even easier to come up with the ideal procedure if you don’t even bother to watch the worker at work, but just do it from your office, on paper. Almost anything can look good that way. Even when we do our own analysis in our teams, some of the silliest ideas can slip through before we try it out.

There’s a lot of things that enter into a good job design. Little things can make a big difference, like how high or low the stock is placed or how the tools are organized or where the hoses are. The person actually doing the job is the only one who can see all those factors. And in the U.S., engineers have never had to work on the floor – not like in Japan. So they don’t know what they don’t know.

In the typical U.S. plant, you never even saw the IE – they stayed in their cozy offices upstairs. They never talked to workers about how to improve their jobs.

Today, we drive the process, and if we need their help, the engineer is there the next day to work on it with us.”

Smith put this contrast in a broader perspective:

“In most plants, management assumes the “divine right” to design jobs as they see fit. And in the U.S. auto industry, workers have historically agreed to that in exchange for higher wages. Management was willing to pay a ton of money to the workers to preserve its prerogative.

But in practice, the old way of setting standards was just ridiculous. An Industrial Engineer would shut himself away in an isolated office and consider how long it took for somebody to twist their wrist and move their arm in such and such a way, and calculate from some manual and try that way to come up with a task design. The IE would take this “properly” designed job to the foreman. The foreman would not his head, but then said “screw you” to the IE’s back and redesigned the task to his own liking. Then he’d take his task design to the worker and said “Do it this way or you’re out.” The worker would not but would pull the same trick on the foreman. In the end, the job got done however the worker could. When the boss walked by, the worker might pretend to do the job the way the foreman had told him. Everybody involved knew this was going on but no one cared to do anything about it.

Multiply that game by the number of shifts and the number of different people involved and you’ve got a process you can’t control. You can’t build a quality car like that. You can’t even go back and improve the process, because the IE lives in dream world, doesn’t have a clue how the job is actually done, and doesn’t have any impact. The foreman’s impact is also zip. Nobody talks to the worker even though he’s the one guy who can do something about the problem. Nobody wants to listen to him. That’s basically how most of the auto industry operates even today.

So you can see why standardized work is so revolutionary.

And why most IEs are pretty uncomfortable with it!””

The ‘Learning Bureaucracy’
Paul S. Adler

“I said, “In order to speed things up, I’ll tell you what I’m doing, so you’ll know where I’m aiming. I want to know whether there’s the same lack of communication between the engineers and the management who are working on the engine as we found in the case of the booster rockets.”

Mr. Lovingood says, “I don’t think so. As a matter of fact, although I’m now a manager, I was trained as an engineer.”

“All right”, I said, “Here’s a piece of paper each. Please write on your paper the answer to this question: what do you think is the probability that a flight would be uncompleted due to a failure in this engine?”

They wrote down their answers and hand in their papers. One guy wrote “99-44/100% pure” (copying the Ivory soap slogan), meaning about 1 in 200. Another guy wrote something very technical and highly quantitative in the standard statistical way, carefully defining everything, that I had to translate – which also meant about 1 in 200. The third guy wrote, simply, “1 in 300.”

Mr. Lovingood’s paper, however, said.

“Cannot quantify. Reliability is judged from:
– past experience
– quality control in manufacturing
– engineering judgment”

“Well”, I said, “I’ve got four answers, and one of them weaseled.” I turned to Mr. Lovingood: “I think you weaseled.”

“I don’t think I weaseled.”

“You didn’t tell me what your confidence was, sir; you told me how you determined it. What I want to know is: after you determined it, what was it?”

He says, “100 percent” – the engineers’ jaws drop, my jaw drops, I look at him, everybody looks at him – “uh, uh, minus epsilon!”

So I say, “Well yes; that’s fine. Now, the only problem is, WHAT IS EPSILON?”

He says, “10^-5”. It was the same number that Mr. Ullian had told us about: 1 in 100,000.

I showed Mr. Lovingood the other answers and said, “You’ll be interested to know that there is a difference between engineers and management here – a factor of more than 300.””

What Do You Care What Other People Think?
Richard Feynman

V

“You build 3-dimensional things. The design space [however] is n-dimensional. You design in n-dimensional space, one dimension for every parameter you can adjust. Therefore it is not 3-dimensional space that matters in design, it is n-dimensional space.

And n-dimensional space is vast. Very, very large.

To convince you of this, I will start by your own experience. You think you know 3-dimensional space, but you really don’t. You are really familiar with 2 dimensions. In 2 dimensions, a random walk will come back to the same place: if you meet a person, there’s a good chance you’ll meet them again.

In 3 dimensions, that is not true. In 3 dimensions, say the ocean where the fish live, what do they do? They go around on the bottom, they go around on the surface, they go around in schools, they assemble at the mouth of a river. They cannot wander the open ocean and hope to find a mate. That’s how vast 3 dimensions is. You can wander around 2 dimensions and sure enough, you can get a mate. Probably. In 3 dimensions, not a very good chance.

In higher ones, forget it.

But that is the space of design. You’re out there in that tremendously vast space.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

“Imagine you knew a guy. Imagine this guy was willing to say for you, “Yeah, if she has her tits chopped off, she’s totally a man now.” Like, doesn’t that give you a warm fuzzy feeling? He must really like you to be willing to lie that flagrantly to help you out.

Problem is if you make too many friends, the lie will become a thing. Is he lying for you, or just because everyone is doing it? So now you have to come up with an even bigger lie, and see if he’ll still say it.”

“#pointDeerMakeHorse”

“But would you be willing to ride the deer?”

“If you’re not then it shows that you don’t really believe it’s a horse, no?”

“The future is fucking a man to signal you think he’s a woman, forever.”

Alrenous, Covfefe Anon, Parallax Optics

“So Zhao Gao brings a deer into the palace. Grabs it from the horns, calls the emperor to come out, and says “look your majesty, a brought you a fine horse”. The Emperor, not amused, says “Surely you are mistaken, calling a deer a horse. Right?”. Then the emperor looks around at all the ministers. Some didn’t say a word, just sweating nervously. Some others loudly proclaimed what a fine horse this was. Great horse. Look at this tail! These fine legs. Great horse, naturally prime minister Zhao Gao has the best of tastes.

A small bunch did protest that this was a deer, not a horse. Those were soon after summarily executed. And the Second Emperor himself was murdered some time later.”

The Purpose of Absurdity
Spandrell/Bloody Shovel

“No idiot, it’s the opposite. How you mouthbreathers are let loose in society is beyond me”

“The premise of democracy is to let loose all the mouthbreathers.”

Unknown, Alrenous

“What percentage of people do you estimate believe democracy should be valued for its innate value and not simply its ability to on average deliver better results than authoritarian states?”

“So this economist here means to tell us that “value” and “results” aren’t the exact same thing.”

Unknown, Spandrell/Bloody Shovel

“Can you imagine an ethnologist observing gorillas for years only to conclude that their behaviour is “wrong” and that they ought to do something else instead? How ridiculous would that be? Now consider our humanities and social studies professors who supposedly study human nature.”

Unknown

“We need to be subject to critique by people who know what they’re doing.”

“This is hard when the West largely rejects the idea that some people know what they are doing better than others.”

various/Unknown

“Primogeniture, inheritance of the family fortune by the firstborn. This practice has since been replaced by the more humane system of inheritance by lawyers.”

Samo Burja

“the CDC performs a very important function, which is to render legible that which the government wishes to define as disease”

Literal Banana

“It’s increasingly clear, if it wasn’t already, that the “Rule of Law” that is supposedly the core of Western society is in reality just Rule of Lawyers. Or Rule of Judges, who by far have the largest discretion of any power holder. They can ban and overturn anything.”

Spandrell/Bloody Shovel

“It’s amazing. You have all of these oppressed brown people – excuse me, let me use the worshippable, sacrilizing term – people of color.

And by color, I mean the color brown.

The people of color brown, they’re constantly trying to get into these places, these white spaces, white organizations, white institutions, that are oppressing them!

Imagine if the Armenians in Turkey had some march in Istanbul, demanding to be served by Turkish diners, or staged sit-ins in Ankara. They would be killed, and the government would look the other way. Or if the Kurds marched into Baghdad and demanded equal funding for their schools, and that the people of Baghdad should pay for it because Baghdad has more money, that this was their right, equal rights meant that the Baghdadis had to pay for their schools, to pay for their stuff.

Actually oppressed people don’t behave this way.

In the United States, who is trying to gain access to the other? Who is trying to escape the other? Who would rather have an hour commute than live in a neighborhood predominated by the other?

Is it called “Black Flight”? Or “White Flight”?”

Ryan Faulk/The Alternative Hypothesis

“It’s *after* you apologize that you get in trouble. People smell weakness. They detect the difference between an action caused by principles and one driven by fear.”

Nassim Nicholas Taleb

“The wasted space (and its contribution to overall impoverishment) in our stagnant cities is definitely on my mind a lot–but it’s not surprising that high real estate costs in other cities haven’t changed things for them, mainly because they’re just too far away to benefit from places which are still thriving–they only *work* when they have functional economies of their own.

It’s like that tedious cliche about “why do Americans need to build dense when we have S P A C E” as if all the acreage in, say, Wyoming makes an ounce of a difference to people trying to live and work in, say, Boston.

Or for that matter, all the acreage in WESTERN MASS vis-a-vis the people trying to live and work in Boston.”

Alex Forrest

“Well, ok, but why? How did this mistake happen? He of course does no attempt at explaining. Because his job, the job of Pat Buchanan is to be a conservative, and the job of conservatives is not to understand a thing. The job of conservatives is, and has been for decades, to state their confusion with a tone of strong indignation. I don’t understand this! Hmm! I am angry, yes I am, this makes no sense, and that makes me angry. Join me in my indignation, oh and buy my book. Hmph!

[…] if you don’t get something, that’s a statement about the limits of your intellect rather than about the nature of the problem. If you don’t get something, the problem is with you, not with the issue. Go try and understand it, and then come back. Your indignation solves exactly nothing.“

Mistakes Happen for a Reason
Spandrell/Bloody Shovel

“Slave ownership has traditionally taken very curious forms. The best slave is someone you overpay and who knows it, terrified of losing his status.

Multinational companies created the expat category, a sort of diplomat with a higher standard of living who represents the firm far away and runs its business there. All large corporations had (and some still have) employees with expat status and, in spite of its costs, it is an extremely effective strategy. Why? Because the further from headquarters an employee is located, the more autonomous his unit, the more you want him to be a slave so he does nothing strange on his own.

A bank in New York sends a married employee with his family to a foreign location, say, a tropical country with cheap labor, with perks and privileges such as country club membership, a driver, a nice company villa with a gardener, a yearly trip back home with the family in first class, and keeps him there for a few years, enough to be addicted. He earns much more than the “locals”, in a hierarchy reminiscent of colonial days. He builds a social life with other expats. He progressively wants to stay in the location longer, but he is far from headquarters and has no idea of his minute-to-minute standing except through signals.

Eventually, like a diplomat, he begs for another location when time comes for a reshuffle. Returning to the home office means loss of perks, having to revert to his base salary – a return to lower-middle-class life in the suburbs of New York City, taking the commuter train, perhaps, or, God forbid, a bus, and eating a sandwich for lunch! The person is terrified when the big boss snubs him. Ninety-five percent of the employee’s mind will be on company politics…

…which is exactly what the company wants.

The big boss in the board room will have a supporter in the event of some intrigue.”

Skin in the Game
Nassim Nicholas Taleb

“If you have ten loyal, conscientious workers, the advantage over having ten sullen nihilists is easily destroyed by having one truly bad hire who you can’t fire without invoking a lawsuit. Some (enough) companies have responded by making working conditions bad enough that everyone wants to leave, then trying to entice good ones to stay on the sly.

[… M]anorial nobles offered good working conditions because if you really pissed them off they could have you executed. Work is terrible to the extent it is protected. See also: communism.”

Alrenous

“I find it very disturbing how people can casually recommend working two or three jobs as a long-term solution to life’s problems, because it demonstrates the reality that in the post-industrial west, you are no longer a citizen of a national body or a society with a clearly defined identity and culture. You are a citizen of an economy, and your life’s purpose and value is reduced to being a menial laborer in a larger body whose sole ideology is simply production for purposeless expansion. You are a cog in a machine, and exist for that purpose only to be discarded when your utility to the religion of production has exhausted itself. For fuck’s sake, your value as a person is literally measured by your economic productivity and the money that you accumulate from it.

A fucking peasant in the twelfth century has led a more meaningful life than the majority of the machinated zombies that call themselves “people” we are surrounded by today. Contemporary society is too focused on work and not focused enough on living. In prior historical epochs work was viewed as a means towards living. It is a sacrifice to be done and gotten over with in order to realize a goal. Today, it is conflated WITH living. Post-industrial society views the act of work to be the very essence of life. You work, and therefore you live. We have built the ultimate materialist society.”

Unknown

“16th century: They promised us religious freedom and tore up the commons, slaughtered the monks and crushed the statues of our saints.
18th century: They promised us political freedom and exchanged our village councils and manor courts with a vote for a distant parliament.
19th century: They promised us financial freedom and led us into dark and noisy factories and crowded slums rife with disease and debt.
20th century: They promised us national freedom if only we would stand up to be counted for the draft, learning to bayonet our brothers.
21st century: They promised us the freedom from identity, from family and descendants, if only we gave up all that our ancestors left us.

And here we are today: with nothing left to offer and nothing left to take.”

Wrath of Gnon

“Part of being a historian is that you quickly learn to become a hater of all things.

And you realize we’re on a small boat in a world of shit and there’s a leak.”

Jason Scott

“If you can’t plan or make decisions, you will have trouble with everything you touch.”

[But this is ridiculous! He got hit in the head with ten pounds of steel, and then less than a minute later he went at it again! This is a professional handyman?!]

“People can live their whole lives without learning anything.”

Dad

“It’s not a problem. It’s a predicament; it has no solution, only outcomes.”

The Real Reason Your City Has No Money
Strong Towns
Charles Marohn

VI

“You’re thinking, “I don’t want to hear about how everything is interpretable through the artificial paradigm of narrative structure–” as if it was me and not your god who made it this way, as if I was better able to invent a convenient fiction that happened to apply to you rather than describe a process that’s been used for millennia. You think you’re the first? You think no one but you has lived your life? Do you think you are so unique? Do you think I just took a guess? This isn’t the first time this game has been played, there’ve been over 100 generations of Guess What Happens Next and it is the exact same answer every single time. All of this has happened before and it will happen again.

But you want “why”, you’re drawn to “why” like you’re drawn to a pretty girl in the rain. Let me guess: she has black hair, big eyes, and is dressed like an ingenue. “Why?” is the most seductive of questions because it is innocent, childlike, infinite in possibilities, and utterly devoted to you.

“Why am I this way? Why do I do what I do?” But what will you do with that information? What good is it? If you were an android, would it change you to know why you were programmed the way you were? “Why” is masturbation, “why” is the enemy, the only question that matters is, now what?

But you want “why”.  Ok, here we go.”

Amy Schumer Offers You A Look Into Your Soul
The Last Psychiatrist

“Whenever anything unexpected happens, the programmed role has to be dragged, kicking and screaming, into the future, and when it isn’t, Rome falls.”

Alrenous

“It doesn’t matter what you know. It matters only what you can think of in time.”

The Book of Five Rings
Miyamoto Musashi

“It is a principle of the art of war that one should simply lay down his life and strike. If one’s opponent also does the same, it is an even match. Defeating one’s opponent is then a matter of faith and destiny.”

Hagakure
Yamamoto Tsunetomo

VII

“But I didn’t prove it for the skater. The skater uses muscle force. Gravity is a different force. Yet it’s true for the skater.

Now we have a problem: we can deduce, often, from one part of physics, like the law of gravitation, a principle which turns out to be much more valid than the derivation! This doesn’t happen in mathematics, that the theorems come out in places where they’re not supposed to be.

In other words, if we were to say that the postulates of physics were this law of gravitation, we could deduce the conservation of angular momentum, but only for gravitation. But we discover experimentally that the conservation of angular momentum is a much wider thing. Newton had other hypostulates by which he could get the more general conservation law of angular momentum. But Newtonian laws were wrong. There’s no forces, it’s all a lot of baloney, the particles don’t have orbits, yet – the analog, the exact transformation of this principle about the areas, the conservation of angular momentum is true with atomic motions in quantum mechanics and is still, as far as we can tell, exact.

So we have these wide principles which sweep across all the different laws. And if one takes too seriously its derivation, and feels that this is only valid because this is valid, you cannot understand the interconnections between the different branches of physics.

Someday, when physics is complete, then maybe with this kind of argument, we know all the laws, then we can start with some axioms, and no doubt somebody will figure out a particular way doing it. But while we don’t know all the laws, we can use some to make guesses at theorems which extend beyond their proof.”

The Character of Physical Law
Richard Feynman

VIII

“Modernism did its immense damage in these ways: by divorcing the practice of building from the history and traditional meanings of building, by promoting a species of urbanism that destroyed age-old social and, with them, urban life as a general proposition; and by creating a physical setting for man that failed to respect the limits of scale, growth, and consumption of natural resources, or to respect the lives of other living things. The result of Modernism, especially in America, is a crisis of the human habitat: cities ruined by corporate gigantism and abstract renewal schemes, public buildings and public spaces unworthy of human affection, vast sprawling suburbs that lack any sense of community, housing that the un-rich cannot afford to live in, a slavish obeisance to the needs of automobiles and their dependent industries at the expense of human needs, and a gathering ecological calamity that we have only begun to measure.”

The Geography of Nowhere
James Howard Kunstler
Wrath of Gnon

“[…C]ommunities are not for justice, peace, defense, or traffic, but for the sake of the good life, the Summum Bonum. This good life has always meant the satisfaction of four basic social desires, desires to which earlier designers have always given material and structural shape. These desires are conviviality, religiosity, intellectual growth, and politics. […] If a new region is to be successfully developed, decentralized, and open-ended to many possibilities, some interventions are simple. What will be needed is the construction of focal points at primitive crossroads: a sidewalk cafe, a restaurant serving excellent meals, a little concert hall or theater, a charming church, a well-designed meeting hall.

To sum up the success of old and the failure of modern community design in one sentence: ancient planners, recognizing the invariable Aristotelian purpose of why people live in communities, put all their talent into the building of the communal nucleus […] The rest of the settlement then followed naturally.

In contrast, modern designers are forever building the rest of the city.”

The Idea of Design
Victor Papanek
Wrath of Gnon

“You know, they never prohibited us from walking through the plant, understanding, even asking questions of some of their key people. I’ve often puzzled over that– why they did that. And I think they recognized, we were asking all the wrong questions. We didn’t understand this bigger picture thing.

All of our questions were focused on the floor, the assembly plant, what’s happening on the line. That’s not the real issue.

The issue is, how do you support that system with all the other functions that have to take place in the organization?”

Ernie Schaefer
This American Life #561: NUMMI 2015

“You’re going to find within your lifetime, but not much within mine, that you have moved more than you would have expected from L2 to L1 or Linfinity, and you will find that statistics does not support you. The chi-squared test is a good example of this: an L2 fit. They haven’t bothered to work out the L1 or Linfinity qualities of it. The mathematics are a little more ferocious. It’s a little more difficult.

But with modern machines, who cares about how difficult math is, we just let the machines grind away, they can do a few billion operations a second, what do I care.

It is better to get the right problem solved a little bit slowly, than to rapidly solve the wrong problem.

I announce that as a very general theorem. The tendency is to try to solve the wrong problem elegantly and rapidly. And I have seen that enormous times in my life; grabbing something I can cope with and solving the wrong problem, announcing the exact answer to the wrong problem.

Generally speaking, I would rather have an approximate answer to the right problem. And that is where the difficulty arises: identifying the problem. The greatest step in creativity is recognizing that there is a problem. The second greatest step is identifying the nature of the problem.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

“I think the best definition of politics is one I found in an American dictionary, which said, ‘the art or science of governance of a country, and how it runs its internal and external relations’.

Translated in real life, it means “How is my life affected by the government?”. Do I have a job? Do I have a home? Do I have medicine when I need it? Do I have enough recreational facilities? Is there a future for my children? Will they be educated, will there be a chance to advance in society?

If you do not have any of these things, you are going to find agitation.

You have no recollection of this because you were not born, but in the 1950s and 1960s, Singapore was in a state of agitation every day. You look up your old Straits Times and [other newspapers], archives. Look at the riots, the strikes. Why? No homes, half the children were not in schools. 14% unemployment and underemployment. Pirate taxi drivers. No job, so I take a car, pay no license, no insurance, come in I give you a ride. 50 cents, 20 cents, so on. Hookers all over the place.

Today, over 40 years, we have transformed it, because assiduously we attended to the politics of life.

That’s what it’s about.

‘What is the future?’.

If I can have another political party, you can have another political party, to look after you, the way the PAP has, I say, my job is done, finished. I can go home, and sit back, and read the books I want to read.”

Lee Kuan Yew

IX

“Mechanical innovations, including mechanized cities, can add to our experience and stimulate our perceptive capacities, but they do not eradicate the mechanisms of human physiology.

The proper size of a bedroom has not changed in thousands of years.

Neither has the proper size of a door nor the proper size of a community. If cities have become immense, so much more is the need for subdividing them into comprehensible sections. Transportation systems may render the outlying parts of the city more accessible, but communities must remain individual entities whose size and appearance are comprehensible. The physical fact of scale must also be visually apparent. When these principles are violated the results are cities without human form, cities without sympathy, cities without pride. Worse still are the effects on the spirit and human sensitivities of its people.”

Paul D. Spreiregen
Wrath of Gnon

“Authoritarian systems have many problems but pork isn’t one of them. The guys who gotta eat aren’t that many, and you don’t need an elaborate faith argument to set up a system for pork distribution.

Say China.

China makes their high speed rail system, spends untold trillions on it, trillions paid by public debt which will probably never pay themselves. 90% of the stations built 30km out of the main cities, many in the middle of rice paddies where proper roads haven’t even been built yet. How many billions were skimmed of it? I don’t know but the Railway Minister is in jail and the Ministry itself was abolished, which means even the Chinese government is embarrassed by it. But hey China now has a pretty cool high speed rail network which they sorely needed, works like a charm, and out of the hugest budget in human history they only had to pay off some local officials and the railway minister. I’ve seen estimates of 5%.

The waste on pre-K education is 100%.”

Pork and Hamsters
Spandrell/Bloody Shovel

“The fact that it’s large is why censorship matters. Nobody cares about small forums censoring people.”

“Just because something is on the internet does not mean it’s a “public space”.”

“Yeah so what? We need to make sure large companies aren’t able to control who can go where and do what. You can’t kill somebody just for being in your house. So obviously there’s a line that needs drawing.”

“You’re forgetting that another entity could provide the well for the other demographic, seeing as there’s money to be made there.”

“It’s an example of there being limited availability in resources. In the example of the water, there’s no time to wait for the market to dig another well to save the person. Any excuse can be made, but the end result is the person dies, not that property rights have been saved. The same thing is happening with social media. […] If it’s the greater races at stake. The future of civilization at stake. Then there’s no length we shouldn’t go to to save it. Property becomes less important. It’s a hierarchy of needs for civilization to survive.

[…] The entire premise is virtual or not, private or not, when something dominates how we live our lives, we need to look at how we can update those areas to reflect our values. Those values conflict with private property every day and we have to make hard decisions. Private property is an ideal just like freedom of speech, belief, etc. […] Property rights are incredibly important, but there are times they hinder civilization. If it allows us to get run over and civilization destroyed, and property rights destroyed as a result, then they weren’t very good ideals. This is why libertarians have mostly become fascists of some sort. At least until we get control of things like borders and universities.”

“There is no comparison between forcing a company to manage it’s website a certain way and border control.”

“It’s not a comparison. It’s about taking every ground we can to support the existence of civilization. Property rights are good at that, but only to a point. We also need to think in terms of collective property rights.

We can’t just wait until something reaches our doorstep. Collective power always has and always will matter.”

Arman, Unknown

“No one rules alone, thus when the King attempts to gather all power in his own hands, he finds he has in fact gathered all power into the hands of dangerous powerful people dangerously close the throne. To fix this problem, the official Church need to remind the people that the God who commanded obedience to Kings, also commanded that Kings, like other men, should refrain from coveting that which belongs to someone else.

Repeating: Freehold means that the peasant in his hovel possesses Kingly power under his hovel’s roof, which Kingly power the King has no right to mess with, even if the peasant abuses it. That power is not the King’s to interfere with, even if the peasant is arguably mistreating his wife and his children. If the lord stops that peasant from mistreating his wife and children, pretty soon King George the Fourth gets cuckolded, as he cuckolded others. […]”

Throne, Altar, and Freehold
Jim’s Blog

“Even compared to other ancient societies, Roman law and culture gave the head of household extreme power over their family. For example, children did not have separate property, including unmarried adult children, and a patriarch faced no legal punishment for killing his own children or slaves.

Practices of this type, combined with the feelings people naturally have for their immediate family, made households internally coordinated to a ludicrous degree. For instance, you didn’t have to worry about your second-in-command leaving to work for a competitor, because law and custom were on your side if you physically drag him back. Thus, a skilled patriarch would have a power base that was effectively immune to most attacks short of murder. This greatly lessened the Problem of Local Focus, making the household much more formidable.”

Production of Elites in the Roman Republic
Ben Landau-Taylor

“Centralization leads to complexity, complexity leads to crisis, attempts to fix the crisis have, because of complexity, unintended consequences, which escalate into further crisis, leading to further centralization, Hence Soviet Russia, Hitler’s Germany, Venezuela, and now America.

This is the crisis of socialism, explained in “I pencil”, which makes the point that no one actually knows how to make a pencil, hence socialist production of pencils will fail.

In order to manage complexity, you need walls, so that one man can make decisions without having his decisions mucked up by another man’s decisions. Hence, private property and local authority, the authority of the father, the authority the business owner, the authority of the CEO. And, not so long ago, the authority of the local aristocrat, who tended to be a high officer in the local militia, a major employer and landowner, and related by blood or marriage to most of the other high officers in the local militia.

Ideally all the consequences of a decision should be contained within those walls. Of course they never are, but if you try to manage all the externalities, things very quickly slide of control. Every attempt to manage the externalities has unexpected consequences, and attempts to deal with the unexpected consequences have additional unexpected consequences, because trying to control matters that have externalities connects everything to everything else, resulting in a tangle beyond human comprehension.”

Throne, Altar, and Freehold
Jim’s Blog

“Hmm? It is a staple of theater, though I am not so fond of it. I prefer an ending where the many plots are resolved, yes.

But without a god’s intervention, human animosity and love cannot easily be erased. The playwright must have reached the end of his rope. Most writers know the tangled web of human emotions cannot be undone by humans themselves. So, the deus ex machina is an expression of hope.

A last hope, to be sure, a mirage created by those on the verge of ruin, wishing for a savior.”

Nero Claudius
Fate/Extra

X

“If you go to India, you’ll find sadhus, holy men, people who abjure the world, who go around giving land away or begging from the rich to give to the poor. It’s a totally different culture. There’s the sort of Gandhi saintliness.

It’s not the model in China. In China, the model is either Three Kingdoms or Shui Hu Zhuan, Water Margin, the kind of hero who forms a robber band and kills off wealthy people. You don’t go begging from the wealthy to give to the poor. You just kill the wealthy and take from them.

So it is a completely different philosophy to guide a man in life.”

Lee Kuan Yew

“To grasp the essence of a political culture that does not recognise the possibility of transcendental truths demands an unusual intellectual effort for Westerners, an effort that is rarely made even in serious assessments of Japan. The occidental intellectual and moral traditions are so deeply rooted in assumptions of the universal validity of certain beliefs that the possibility of a culture existing without such assumptions is hardly ever contemplated. Western child-rearing practice inculcates suppositions that implicitly confirm the existence of an ultimate logic controlling the universe independently of the desires and caprices of human beings. This outlook, constantly reaffirmed in later life, inclines Westerners to take for granted that all advanced civilisations develop concepts of universal validity, and they are therefore not prompted to examine the effects of their absence.”

The Enigma of Japanese Power
Karel van Wolferen

“There are two types of societies. This isn’t a theory of evolution, or about which is better than which.

There are societies that respect their relationship with nature, and others that do not. This is about how societies view change.

The native people of Canada tried not to break the bones of salmon they ate, and returned the bones to the rivers. Native people from eastern and western parts of Russia decorated the skulls of the seals they captured and dismantled, and returned them to the master of the sea along with their poetries. They thought fur and meat were gifts from the animals as a proof of their friendship, and they returned those gifts by adding spiritual values to the bones. They showed their respect towards nature through their meals. This is because they thought the true form of animals were gods who wore the skins of animals. Because they wanted the gods to visit them again, they served by giving back to them respectfully. There are similar beliefs in Northern Eurasian and North American cultures, and many myths remain.

But in modern day Japan, there probably aren’t that many people who still believe that animals are able to talk and that gods live inside of them. They’re looking down on nature. They see animals as something they can naturally steal from, and if they feel like they took a little too much from it – they can just start protecting them. That’s how they see it.

When did that kind of arrogant society form…?

The key factor is the appearance of technology.

Specifically, weapons made of iron.

After obtaining these excellent weapons, man’s respect towards animals faded. In the tales told around Sakhalin, there is a verse that says, “Swords that cut extraordinarily well were passed on from Japan, and after that, bears were killed easily”. A certain individual born in a heretical land one day realized: this is a weapon that god gave, but it is a weapon able to kill god.

The origin of the word technology is the Greek word “Techne”.

“Techne” means “to artificially draw out the blessings that an object is hiding”.

A good example is heating up a rock and taking the iron out of it.

The sword and technology stolen from god gave man power that even gods will fear. For them to visit again, giving back to them respectfully… there’s no need for such things anymore.

Now, we can simply take everything.”

Ch. 148 – “Human Society – The Grave of Bears”
Terra Formars

“So it basically all goes back to when a gay kiddly fiddler named plato once foolishly agreed with some sophists that the senses were unreliable, setting up 2000+ years worth of fanboys who took him seriously after to fruitlessly retread the same ground over and over and produce schizophrenia in written form attempting to make systems of thought around taking such an assumption as a given. Blunder of the millennium really.

But anyways, skipping a lot we arrive at Descartes, who could perhaps be considered a seminal example of the needless handwringing brought about by taking the athenian pederast seriously. Like many of his unfortunate fellows (and unfortunate countrymen who had(and have)to live in a society subjected to the (ostensibly)intellectual output of such unfortunate fellows), he made an attempt to produce an epistemology while assuming the premise that senses are essentially unreliable as a given. His attempt at a solution to this intractable thought exercise (for intractable, and a thought exercise, it both is) was what some might recognize as ‘categorically imperative’ avant la letre, before Kant himself gave the irascible mode of thought its name.

In the most simplest terms, the ‘enlightenment project’ basically comes down to the desire to produce a system, that is wholly atemporal or universal, which can be used naively to calculate any possible knowledge, wholly separate from any particular user agent. The ultimate failure mode of all this was, of course, the fact that the capacity of any given system is necessarily contingent on the capacity of its creator; no being within Being could create a system that fully encapsulates being; for if it did, then it already does.

It was the ultimate failure of such a project that gave rise to the oft misunderstood post-modernist schools of thought, particularly the french continentals. Who, while claiming to be overturning the modernism typical of Descartes and those inspired by him, ironically retained the same modernist/enlightenment standards of evidence; standards that dictate that any valid proposition must be universally valid; that any proposition with an exception anywhere is just as worthless as any other; standards that, if you were to actually take them seriously and apply them consistently, would imply that knowledge itself is impossible.

Which means naturally, of course, that noone (least of all the baizuo lumpenproles) ever actually applies them consistently, but instead in selective, tactical manners, to rhetorically dissolve Things They Don’t Like in the acid of nominalism, while leaving their own conceits overlooked.”

Wowexuberant

“There’s an entire field of the arts that’s missing because logic isn’t sufficiently appreciated. Namely -actual- psychology, the study of the soul, starting with enumeration of all qualia. Wikipedia has a list of biases. It does not have a list of cures for those biases. Further, it’s rather half-hearted. There’s a whole nosology of thought that’s missing because philosophers have let humans believe they’re normally rational. The Greeks had four or more words for love. English has one. People might experience love differently, but, like, who cares? It’s just fee-fees.

Oh, but it turns out qualia are the basis for all life goals, and also the foundation for all knowledge.

So, uh, oops.”

Alrenous

XI

“Mathematics is a way of going from one set of statements to another. It’s evidently useful in physics, because we have all these different ways we can speak of things and permits us to develop consequences and analyze the situations and change the laws in different ways and to connect all the various statements, so as a matter of fact, the total amount a physicist knows is very little, he has only to remember the rules for getting from one place to another, and he’s able to do that. In other words, all the various statements about equal times forces, the forces in the direction of the radius and so on are all interconnected by reasoning.

Now an interesting question comes up: is there some pattern to it?

Is there a place to begin, fundamental principles, and deduce the whole works?

[…] Because all these theorems are interconnected by reasoning, there isn’t any real way to say, ‘well these are the bottom, and these are connected through logic’. Because if you were told it was this one or this one, you could also run the logic the other way if you weren’t told that one, and work out that one, like a bridge with lots of members and it’s overconnected. If pieces have dropped out, you can reconnect it another way.

[…] The Babylonian thing that I’m talking about is to say, I happen to know this and I happen to know that, and maybe I know that, and I work everything out from there, and then tomorrow, I forgot that this was true, but I remember that this was true, and I reconstruct it again, and so on, and I’m never quite sure where I’m supposed to begin and where I’m supposed to end, I just remember enough all the time so that the memory fades, and the pieces fall out, I put the thing back together again every day. […]

The method of starting from the axioms is not efficient in obtaining the theorems. In working something out in geometry, you’re not very efficient if each time you have to start back at the axioms. But if you have to remember a few things in geometry, you can always get somewhere else. It’s much more efficient to do it the other way.

What the best axioms are are not exactly the same, in fact are not ever the same, as the most efficient way of getting around in the territory.”

The Character of Physical Law
Richard Feynman

“The voyage of the Great Eastern was ended. Twice had she been victorious over the sea. Twice she had laid the spoils of victory on the shores of the New World, and her mission was accomplished. All on board, who had been detained weeks beyond the expected time, were impatient to return; and accordingly she prepared to sail the very next day on her homeward voyage. The Medway, which had on board the cable for the Gulf of St. Lawrence, remained two or three weeks longer, and with the Terrible, whose gallant officers had volunteered for the service, successfully accomplished that work. But the Great Eastern was bound for England, and Mr. Field had now to part from his friends on board. It was a trying moment. Rejoiced as he was at the successful termination of the voyage, yet when he came to leave the ship, where he had spent so many anxious days and weeks, both this year and the year before; and to part from men to whom he was bound by the strong ties that unite those embarked in a common enterprise—brave companions in arms—he could not repress a feeling of sadness. It was with deep emotion that Capt. Anderson took him by the hand, as he said, “The time is come that we must part.” As he went over the side of the ship, “Give him three cheers!” cried the commander; “And now three more for his family!” The ringing hurras of that gallant crew were the last sounds he heard as he sunk back in the boat that took him to the Medway, while the wheels of the Great Eastern began to move, and that noble ship, with her noble company, bore away for England.”

Recovery of the Lost Cable
presented by Bill Burns

“1791 to 1871 – Babbage was minor nobility, he had an idea of building a machine. He had been using tables [for integration and derivation], and the tables had errors. And he said, “If only a steam engine would make them, they would be accurate”.

So, he set out to do it.

[…] Babbage wanted to print out the numbers so that there was no possibility of human error. Well, the technology to do this was beyond his abilities. He greatly improved manufacturing and engineering techniques of building this and that, but he never got it done, in spite of government support.

[…] Babbage never completed it because what happened to him was what happened to a great many people: he no longer was well into one and he had the realization of a better machine. He had the idea of a general purpose computer. Why bother with this difference machine that can only do simple things, when I can build a general purpose computer? So he started doing that, again with government money, and again he did not complete it. It was not his fault, probably, although he was a bit irascible, perhaps with a better temperament he might’ve got it done. But probably not. The technology was not equal to him.

However, somewhere in the 1990s, the British, at a museum where some of the parts were, completed the design, not using heavy gears made out of brass but plastic gears. And the machine ran just as Babbage had designed it. It was, to great extent, a Von Neumann type machine. It has a mill, which you call the arithmetic unit, it has a store, which is typically called memory, it had branching; it had all the features.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

“Fire control computers solve fire control problems.

Their solutions depend on own ship’s course and speed, target range, target bearing, target’s course and speed, wind speed and direction, initial shell velocity, and other factors up to a possible total of twenty-five. The factors occur simultaneously, and many are constantly changing.

But the computer continuously and instantly solves the problem, and sends the answer to the guns as train and elevation orders.

A computer cannot do this without men.

For example, men operate the director, which sends target range and bearing to the computer. And here at the computer, other men set in other information. Obviously computer accuracy depends on the quality of information it receives.

And that depends on the skill and understanding of the men.”

Basic Mechanisms in Fire Control Computers
United States Navy Training Film, 1953

“Why are you going that far to obey the law when that law can neither judge a criminal nor protect people?”

“The law doesn’t protect people. People protect the law.

People have always detested evil and sought out a righteous way of living. Their feelings… The accumulation of those peoples’ feelings are the law. They’re neither the provisions nor the system. They’re the fragile and irreplacable feelings that everyone carries in their hearts. Compared to the power of anger or hatred, they are something that can quite easily break down. People have prayed for a better world throughout time.

In order for those prayers to continue to hold meaning, we have to try our best to protect it to the very end.”

Kogami Shinya, Tsunemori Akane
Psycho-Pass

“I am not trying to elicit sympathy. I am providing the backdrop of how this plan of mine came to be so that you can FEEL it, from one human to another. After all, that is what this is all about.

Civilization does not exist externally. It exists between you and I first.”

Patrick Ryan

“Lastly, in a certain sense, this is a religious course. I am preaching a message, that with one life to lead, you want to do more than just get by. There are a great many religions, and I don’t want to get involved in one or the other too much, it is however an emotional matter I’m really appealing to.

It’s very frequently said that a happy life is one which has some goals achieved. Well, studying the matter over, and reading about it and talking to people, everybody pretty much agrees that it’s not the achievement of the goal that really is the best part. It’s the struggle. The struggle to success is what makes you what you will be.

Remember, at old age, you’re gonna have to live with yourself. There’s no escape living with yourself in your old age. You’re stuck. And at old age, you can’t change as much as when you were younger; consider what kind of person you wish to be in old age.

And start now, being that kind of a person.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

XII

“In the famous tale by Ahiqar, later picked up by Aesop (then again by La Fontaine), the dog boasts to the wolf all the contraptions of comfort and luxury he has, almost prompting the wolf to enlist. Until the wolf asks the dog about his collar and is terrified when he understands its use. “”Of all your means, I want nothing.” He ran away and is still running.”

The question is: what would you like to be, a dog or a wolf?

The original Aramaic version had a wild ass, instead of a wolf, showing off his freedom. But the wild ass ends up eaten by the lion. Freedom entails risks – real skin in the game. Freedom is never free.

[…] A dog’s life may appear smooth and secure, but in the absence of an owner, a dog does not survive. Most people prefer to adopt puppies, not grown-up dogs; in many countries, unwanted dogs are euthanized. A wolf is trained to survive.

Employees abandoned by their employers, as we saw in the IBM story, cannot bounce back.”

Skin in the Game
Nassim Nicholas Taleb

“Above all, don’t overestimate your own power as an individual. Founders are important not because they are the only ones whose work has value, but rather because a great founder can bring out the best work from everybody at his company. […]

To believe yourself invested with divine self-sufficiency is not the mark of a strong individual, but of a person who has mistaken the crowd’s worship – or jeering – for the truth.”

“Zero to One”: Notes on Startups, or How to Build the Future
Peter Thiel

“I ignore polling as a method of government. I think that shows a certain weakness of mind. An inability to chart a course – whichever the way the wind blows, whichever way the media encourages the people to go, you follow.

You are not a leader.”

Lee Kuan Yew

“We have to find our way back to a definite future, and the Western world needs nothing short of a cultural revolution to do it.

Where to start? John Rawls will need to be displaced in philosophy departments. Malcolm Gladwell must be persuaded to change his theories. And pollsters have to be driven from politics. But the philosophy professors and Gladwells of the world are set in their ways, to say nothing of our politicians. It’s extremely hard to make good changes in those crowded fields, even with brains and good intentions.

A startup is the largest endeavor over which you can have definite mastery. You can have agency not just over your own life, but over a small and important part of the world.

It begins by rejecting the unjust tyranny of Chance.

You are not a lottery ticket.”

“Zero to One”: Notes on Startups, or How to Build the Future
Peter Thiel

“Normally, those people would never wake up from their fantasy worlds. They live meaningless lives. They waste their precious days over nothing. No matter how old they get, they’ll continue to say,

“My real life hasn’t started yet.”

“The real me is still asleep, so that’s why my life is such garbage.” They continue to tell themselves that. And they age. Then die.

And on their deathbeds, they will finally realize:

The life they lived was the real thing.

People don’t live provisional lives, nor do they die provisional deaths. That’s a simple fact. The problem – is whether they realize that simple fact.”

Tonegawa Yukio
Gambling Apocalypse Kaiji

“I want to tell you another thing, a story which I’ll use several times: the story of the drunken sailor.

He staggers a couple of steps this way, he staggers a couple of steps that way, this way and that way, this way and that way. In n steps, typically, you’ll get the square root of n distance. In a hundred steps, you’ll get about ten. In ten thousand, it’ll be about a hundred. He may be right where he started, he may be further away, but that’s typical.

On the other hand if there’s a pretty girl over there, he staggers like this, back like this, over like that – he’s going to get a distance proportional to n.

If I can create in you a vision of where you are headed, you will make progress proportional to n.

If you do not have a vision, you will wander like a drunken sailor.

[…] Now you’re gonna say to me, “But Hamming, how do I know the future?”.

It doesn’t matter much, from what I’ve examined in life, what goal you set. Whether you want to march that way, that way, or that way. If you have a goal, you’ll get somewhere near it. If you don’t have a goal, you’re a drunken sailor. My problem is to make you form your goals, and to some extent, try to achieve it. To make you something important rather than just drifting.

It’s comfortable to drift through life. And a great many people when questioned closely will assert that they’re perfectly content to drift through life.

I don’t think too good an idea of that whole thing.

[…] Those who do something generally have some kind of goals and see where they’re headed, and their lives add up. Those who don’t are just a bunch of isolated events.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

“The great thing about standardized work is that if everyone is doing the job the same way, and we run into a problem, say a quality problem, we can easily identify where it’s coming from and fix it. If everyone is doing the job however they feel like, you can’t even begin any serious problem solving.”

Rick Madrid
The ‘Learning Bureaucracy’
Paul S. Adler

“Write psychological rather than logical.
Write so that it can be followed.
Write so that you, five years later, will know what you were doing.
Don’t do some cute trick. You won’t remember.”

Learning to Learn
Richard Hamming

“I don’t care where you read it. I don’t care who said it. Even if I said it. If it doesn’t fit with what you believe and your common sense, then it is not so.”

The Buddha
as relayed by Richard Hamming

“Of course it’s my opinion. It came out of my mouth!”

some Halo 3 machinima
Unknown

“Just because it’s obvious doesn’t mean it’s wrong.”

Evan

nier automata do you think games are silly little things

NieR:Automata

All things have a domain.

This is where the domain of this piece ends.


this exists solely because facebook seems to default to the final image of a post for its preview image. apparently you can control it by setting a html meta property, but that's not allowed in free wordpress. what is allowed though is putting down images in html and then setting them to not show up. so this technically is the last image - as far as facebook is concerned.