If there’s one thing I think that can be said repeatedly and never gets old, it’d be “I’ve learned a lot”.
I’ve said things along the lines of having bad luck or fortune hasn’t favored me recently but that comes and goes – talking about it isn’t particularly interesting, and reading about it definitely isn’t interesting. Even if it does end up being a bad streak, at the time it’ll only sound like pity-fishing and complaining. That kind of stuff goes into things which are single-item and told once (like biographies), not continual update things (like blogs). What you learned though… I think that’s the kind of thing that can always go into writing, even if you “learn” the same thing over and over again. Your blog simply becomes less a facebook page or a twitter, and more of a journal which revolves around some topic. This blog didn’t start as a focus on discipline, but after writing for a bit I found I kept returning to this point automatically. Though I do like writing about it, it was always kind of dry.
There’s a major difference between “I am learning” and “I have learned”. I have been doing the former, but not the latter.
A friend sent me an interesting reddit post, on a thread titled “How do I become normal?”. While I don’t particularly care for being normal (what is the purpose? whatever the purpose is, it is better achieved elsewhere than attempting to become “normal”) , the advice on this comment specifically was intriguing. In short, it says that you have to value your own experiences – you need to see your own life as worth remembering and worth sharing. This attitude not only builds confidence and happiness in yourself, it shows that you believe your life is amazing and gives others a much more tangible reason to be interested in anything you.
I had always believed that as long as you learn the process, or connection between two ideas, you could discard of the origins afterwards. Since it was possible to retain the perspectives while forgetting which exact event led to it, I thought it’d just be fine to free up the mental space for more ideas. It never occurred to me that this almost-pure meta discussion, with no links to stories, would end up just draining me in the end anyways.
A friend of mine (the same fishing friend I’ve talked about) told me that he lives for the memories. After what’s happened these past couple of months, I think I’ll start treating specific stories as more important – whether they be someone else’s, or my own. While I think there are still many important things one can see only from a disconnected and general point of view, I don’t think my presentation of any of those “higher” ideas will be very interesting at all – to me, much less you – if I don’t take care of more the background stuff first. I need to remember I too am human, and there is a person that is writing every word that ever comes into existence on this blog. Being a better man requires not only the “better”, but also the “be” and the “man”.
I have several stories to tell, but I think I’ll break them up into other and shorter posts. If I tried to put em all in this post it’d be too long and might not even get done.
Regardless of all I’ve said about constant movement for motivation, it’s great to get a break. Summer is fabulous; it’s great to be back.